Disclaimer : All characters in Harry Potter belong to J.K Rowling . Only this plot belongs to me .
A.N : This fic is dedicated to all fans of Magic and to this great fandom !!!
This my first attempt at a L/J relationship . I don't how much I have succeeded in doing the afore mentioned desire but may be you all can let me know through your REVIEWS !!!
Summary : This fic is about Lily and James . It is set in the final half of their seventh year . It is a mixed bag of a little bit of fluff , romance , drama and angst .
LOVE me forever !!!
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" Lily "
" Lily "
" Where are you ? "
Lily heard the voices calling for her . But she didn't want anyone to see her at the moment . She was tired of everything and wanted to recompose herself especially after yesterday's events .
She had sent a letter to Prof . Dumbledore and had asked permission to stay out on the grounds for the evening after class . Obviously he allowed , otherwise she wouldn't be here . She was the Head girl and was supposed to be the last person to break the rules . Though this didn't apply to a certain messy black haired boy she knew .
' Oh God ! I want to forget everything that happened then why am I constantly reminded of him ? 'she thought grimly.
' O.k , Lily calm yourself and forget , simply forget about that person . Think about your past years at Hogwarts school of Wizardry .'
She looked back on her years spent at Hogwarts . It was filled with lots of memorable events . To begin with , she was a muggle born and hadn't expected the Hogwarts' letter . Her parents were sweet about it and were really proud of having a witch in the family . Her main goal was to make her parents really happy so she worked very hard and concentrated on being the best student in her year . So instead of making friends , laugh , joke and play around she dedicated her time for studies .
If it had not been for Felicity , Emma and Eliza she would have been alone . She knew they were real , sincere friends who were there for her always . She had accidentally made friends with them and now they four were the inseparables ! They called themselves ' the Queens ' They were best known for their kind and helping mentality rather than pranks exactly opposite to the Mar......
' Again why I am I thinking of that person's group ?
Lily take a hold of yourself and forget about him and his what so ever ! '
She went back to that accident .
It was her first year and she had come back late to her dormitory because she had been deeply absorbed in the book she had been reading . When she entered she saw already every one was in bed except for the bed nearest to her own . It was of a girl named Emma . She had never cared of talking much with her dorm mates except for civility needed . But some how she was sure that one of them had fallen in trouble . So she left her dorm and went out of the common room . She asked the portraits about the missing girl and went to find her.
Then she saw Emma lying on the floor in the corridor . She was having fits . She had read about fits and she knew medical assistance was urgent . She ran back . Fortunately , she ran into Prof. Dumbledore who immediately took Emma to the Hospital wing .
Lily hoped that the girl would get better and wanted to stay in the wing but Madame Pomfrey sent her back to her dorm . Prof. Dumbledore was impressed and had given her 15 points . She didn't care much about the points but rather wished that Emma would get well .
Next evening after the classes she went to visit Emma who had now recovered her consiousness . When she reached there , she saw two other girls busily talking with Emma . She didn't want to interupt them so she slowly decided to withdraw but at that instant Madame Pomfrey came in and said , " I see your back , Lily ! "
The girls stopped talking and looked curiously at her .
Madame went on, "Emma , I guess you know Lily . She had found you yesterday and helped you here otherwise you would have been in a more worser condition . "
Lily asked quietly , " So how are you feeling now ? "
" Much better , thank you . " Emma replied politely.
Soon Madame Pomfrey took the patients' temperature and checked her properly . But before leaving she warned the three visitors not to overstrain their friend . As soon as Madame Pomfrey left Lily wanted to leave . So she said ," O.k then bye , I got to go . "
The other three looked at each other and nodded . Emma shifted slightly on her bed and said , " Lily just wait a sec , I wanted to thank you for saving my life . Since I was a child I have had this problem . Yesterday was one of my worst attacks , if it wasn't for you I don't know what would have happened . "
Lily smiled gently and said , " I am glad that I was there . I didn't do anything much , besides anyone in my position would have done the same . "
The other girl whose name was Eliza added , " Lily , why do you run away from us ? We want to be your friend ."
Lily was taken aback . No one had spoken to her like this . This was the first time somebody wanted to be her friend .
She then heard Felicity saying , " We wanted to be from the very first day but you always ignored us . We know you are kind , soft hearted and affectionate . What ever others think you are , it does not matter to us . We just want to be your friends . So friends ? "
Lily looked at their faces and saw how earnest they were . She grinned and held out her hand . Soon Emma , Eliza and Felicity were laughing and cracking jokes with Lily . From one of their jokes they got the name for their small group as 'the Queens.'
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She knew that it was them who were searching for her just now . Their voices now certainly seemed faded . She hoped that they got her owl telling them that she'll be coming in only later and no one was to wait for her . But she knew her friends . They would always come in search for her to cheer her up especially if they had heard what happened earlier . But at the present she was in no mood or ready to see anyone for that matter .
She then thought of all the fun they had . They understood her much better than anyone else . They used to give her enough and more time to study and pulled her away from books if she spent too much time with it . They used to never force her to come forward because was quite a shy person who didn't like much attention . They made her an honourary member of 'the Queens'. It was for her sake they decided to wear masks when they helped anyone . Many used to wonder why they were so secretive but they knew if they revealed themselves they would surely be heroines but would loose Lily as their friend . Also 'The Queens' knew better and wanted to do service not for gaining popularity but for the true meaning of service .
Another secret hidden from others was that it was her who used to secure first in her form . She hated being centre of attention . So , she had made
Prof . Dumbledore promise that he would never tell anyone except for her parents about it . So every year her class mates were suprised when they saw the yearly position list . This list consisted of three positions and to each were assigned a name depending on the highest scores . They always noticed that the name at the first position was a blank , second was that irritating person's name and third was a boy from Slytherin .
She thought how she had started hating that fellow . From the very first day,
she didn't like to mix up much and never talked to anyone . She used to just keep quiet and listen carefully in the class . The teachers were specially instructed never to ask her questions . But that person with his three other friends got on her nerves . It was none other than the most popular James Potter ,Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew .Their main hobby was teasing and pranking others . She was very sensitive about her looks . She was constantly vexed of her red hair and tiny freckles around her nose .
But one day that spoilt brat took hold of her long red braid and called her , "Carrots,carrots!" She never felt so angry ever before in her life and she immediately reacted violently . Before he could say Quidditch she had emptied her bottle of ink on his hair . She saw how the ink fell onto his shoulders and slowly drip down his forehead . She felt bad at losing her temper before the whole class .Luckily for her no teacher was around .All she wanted to do then was to break into tears but didn't want to satisfy that fool that he had made her cry and break a rule. She just barged out of her class and ran to a secret hideout the Queens had .
She had from that moment vowed that never again will she talk with Potter . Her friends had followed her and comforted her .They told her to be strong and forget about it . They took her back to class . She totally ignored him and the notes he sent her. All she did when she got the notes was to tear them up without even opening them .She knew it was the best method to ignore .
She was soon abandoned by the other girls who were great fans of Potter and his crazy friends . But it didn't matter to her because she never was friends with anyone of them . She had the friends that mattered to her .
They would never forsake her since they truely knew her inside - out.
Though her friends tried to make peace . It never worked because Potter had hurt her pride deeply . She took it as her charisma to defeat him in studies, i.e to be always one step ahead of him . She used to notice how sullen his face was when the yearly lists came showing he was always second and a blank was present in the first position . He never could find out the mystery behind the blank in the year mark lists . He tried many ways but that was something he could never decipher .She was really satisfied that there was something James Potter couldn't find out .
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According to most of the girls in her year .He and his friends were great heros . It seemed as if they knew everything right from all passages and stairs to even go out of school without being observed . She wanted James to fall in trouble but she didn't think it brave to split on people whether they are your enemies or not . She was not of the malicious type so for her securing the first positon every year was revenge itself . She was always succesful in that to this day that is a warm day in her seventh year .
She continued thinking of the events .Now she was ready to pass on to her second year . She remembered that this was the year 'The Marauders' started their pranks . Nobody had a clue about who they were but their pranks were real top class . Most of their pranks were directed at the Slytherins so everyone supported them . They were really popular even more than Potter who was now a Quidditch seeker . She was quite content by that fact .
She still remembered how funny Snape , the boy who usually was the third in class looked when he came to the Big Hall . His hair had changed from black to green and he had a green halo saying that ' I love Marauders' on his head . Everyone had burst out laughing except for herself and her friends as they never liked seeing anyone in distress . It was with a great effort that they restrained themselves from laughing but they certainly knew that the Marauders were really brave and clever who ever they were .
But by the time it had reached the third year .She started receiving some sort of anonymous letters repeating the same message . At first she ignored them thinking it was some joke being played on her but later realised that the person was serious . All of the owls were written in green ink .
She showed the letters to her friends . Eliza took one of them and started reading :
Dear Lily ,
It would be nice if you could be my pen pal . I find you that you have every quality that I search for in a true friend . This letter is not meant to imposing but I don't want to disclose my identity . Please leave a note in the owlery informing me of your decision .
Waiting in hope ,
Your's truely,
PRONGS
After Eliza finished reading ,they had a discussion about it .They came to the conclusion that the person was certainly a boy who wanted to have a good friend to talk to about his problems . Anyway they were sure he was a decent fellow . They felt that there would be no harm in conversing or helping a stranger . Besides it would be good to interact with a boy .
So she left a note in the owlery telling Prongs that she would like to be a friend of his . Within a week an owl came to her with a package . It was a diary with a note on the first page . It said :
Dear Lily ,
I am happy to know that you have accepted my offer for
friendship . Inorder that we converse whenever we can I would like you to use this diary . It is enchanted . I have another diary of the same kind .
So when you write something I'll be able to respond just like as if we were talking . What do you think about it ?
Your new friend ,
PRONGS
p.s : Write in the diary only when the clock strikes twelve at midnight so that I'll be able to reply simultaneously .
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She remembered the many hundreds of conversations she had with that anonymous stranger . The diary had become a part of her life . Even during vacations she would use it and the stranger would reply . The stranger had revealed a lot about himself but still she couldn't find him . She knew it was someone in her school and it was a boy . He was certainly very nice , fun loving and clever . She recollected once that she had asked him when will they meet and he said only by the end of their seventh year . Then she knew it was a boy of her same age .
It was in her fourth year , the anonymous Prongs asked her if she was a member of the Queens . He said he was sure about that even if she denied. She wrote back in the diary that since he was so cock sure about it , she would not waste time denying it . She also wrote that he shouldn't mention this to anyone . He promised that he would not . Though he asked more about
'the Queens', she refused to tell more than that the Queens would help people in trouble especially the smaller ones .
She then ventured to ask if he knew anything about ' The Marauders .' He wrote back that he knew too much about them . He asked her whether she liked the pranks they played . She replied that she did enjoy some of them like the ones played at the Slytherins . But she couldn't accept the pranks played on the other students and teachers .
So after being friends with Prongs for so long . It became a tradition to leave gifts for christmas at the owlery . He really did know how to select gifts and she treasured everything she got from him. They both were real good friends and shared a golden friendship. She told him about her childhood days and about her likes and dislikes. It was at that time he had asked if she hated some one . She told him that she could never hate people except for Voldemort . He wrote back that everyone hated Voldemort including him and when he grows up he wants to be an Auror to defeat this dark wizard .
She continued writing and made it clear that though she didn't hate people she really disliked the Slytherins who called her mudblood and some boys in her class . When he asked her who those unlucky boys were . She told him it was James Potter and his gang . She then wrote in the diary how Potter had hurt her feelings excruciatingly . But Prongs asked her if James had ever asked forgiveness . She affirmed that he did two or three times . But she could never forgive him .
Prongs said he was a bit disappionted because he had thought that she would always listen to reasons and forgive childish pranks .He continued by writing that it was wrong to keep grudges especially if she belonged to ' The Queens ' who are supposed to epitomes of benevolence and forgiveness .She replied that though she had got many chances to take revenge on him she never did . She thought her own small way of getting revenge was much better than offending people in public. He was obviously curious and hence asked in what way did she take her revenge .
She first of all made him promise never to reveal anything about she was going to say to the class or his other friends. She then explained that every year how funny it was to see Potter see his name second in the year lists with a blank on the first position . Then she wrote that it was really her who got the highest marks in the class but she had requested Prof . Dumbledore never to let anyone know that . Prongs said that she was really funny finding such a nice way of taking revenge without actually betraying 'The Queens ' good ideals .
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Then she thought how their relationship blossomed and she was really grateful for his friendship.It was in her fifth year he asked me if she had any boy friends.Though this question was unexpected she replied that she did have many especially many from the first year and second year. He wrote back that it was not that he meant which she very well knew. Then she replied honestly that she didn't have any except for him .She jokily asked why did he ask her such a silly question. He then replied that he wanted to ask her for the masquerade ball coming up next week.
She was happy that she would get to meet him . She answered that though she had been asked by many she secretly hoped that he would ask her. It was a good opportunity to see him without actually knowing who he was. He wrote back that he would meet her sharp eight in the gryffindor common room and also asked her not to wear her mask so that he could find her . It was at that moment she understood that the anonymous Prongs was a gryffindor. She was really surprised but she had never noticed any of Gryffindor boys paying attention to her. This Prongs was a real mystery .
She was really excited for the ball . It was the first time that her friends persuaded her to bring out the real Lily . She used to hate showing her true self and since she was first in her class she used charms which would keep her plain in front of others. Now she removed all those charms . She noted with satisfaction how her hair had changed over the years from red to auburn and how those tiny freckles added a glow to her face.
She wore a green flowing gown with her hair left loose . It brought out the colour of her eyes . She then helped Eliza do her hair and after that did the hair for both Emma and Felicity. All of then looked beautiful . The other girls who usually ignored them looked dumbstruck especially at Lily who looked marvellous . Lily then helped her friends put their masks.She didn't put hers as she first had to meet Prongs . She thought of how she could find more about him maybe look at the colour of his hair and search that same colour after wards.That was certainly a good idea.
As she went down the stairs of the girls dormitories she looked around but she noticed that all the boys who were persent there had the same colour hair. All of them changed their hair scarlet to show that they are Gryffindors she guessed . It was a bit annoying that her plan had failed even before it started .
Then she saw him ,Prongs coming towards her.He certainly looked tall and handsome in his green dress robes. It was a coincidence that both of them wore the same colour.
He came towards her and said softly,his voice a bit muffled because of the mask," Hi Lily , It's me Prongs. "
She replied ,"Hi Prongs . Nice to meet you."
He looked at her and said , " I guess now you can wear your mask . Do you have it ? "
She held up the mask and answered ,"Yes , here's it ."
He asked gently,"Should I help you with it ?"
She looked around and saw her friends giving her thumbs up . She said ,"Yes."
She covered her face by the mask and held out the string at the back for him to tie. While tying her mask he said ,"You have beautiful hair!"
She flushed as he said this and said , " Thanks."
He then offered her his arm and the went to the big hall. She felt self- conscious but she managed to forget everything and think of only the person with her . He did look handsome in a special way. She knew so much about him yet so little . She knew his likes ,dislikes and all about him but she didn't know who he was . She felt wonderful in his arms . He really did know how to dance . They talked and danced a lot . Finally when it was time for everyone to remove their masks , they slipped off . He took her to the Gryffindor common room . She saw that it was time everyone started
returning .So she hastily said, " Prongs won't you give a clue about who you are ?"
He smiled at her innocence and said ," o.k I'll give you a clue but you must n't
try to find me till our seventh year . You must n't even tell your three friends."
She was flabbbergasted and said, " How do you know so much? I never told you that I had only three friends."
He replied knowingly, " What did you think when I said I know that you are a member of 'The Queens', that I didn't know who your friends were? Though you never show out much Lily I do know all about you ."
He looked into her eyes and said , " This is your clue : I am one of the members of ' the Marauders' ."
After saying this he placed a tiny kiss on her cheek and whispered a good night and left for the boys' dormitories.
She stood there holding her cheek where he had just kissed . She then walked back to her room. She changed into her night dress and looked at the time. It was exactly a minute passed twelve. She opened her diary and wrote, " Are you really one of the Marauders ? "
There was no reply.
She thought when Prongs didn't reply it meant he wasn't there. Now she could guess that since he was a part of ' The Marauders ' he must be busy pranking or something . She was amused that a person like that wanted to be her friend . She was not that popular , not that beautiful or at least she didn't want people behind her because of her looks or the fact she was brainy .
She had wanted a person who would understand her .Here was Prongs who had seeked her out and became a good friend. But after meeting him it turned out to be something more . Will she be able to converse to him like before? Maybe if she forget that he had kissed her . But what if it was just a friendly kiss and nothing more ?' Yes , just think that it was !!'
But why did Prongs come into her life? Why did he want to be her friend ?
Is it to form some sort of an alliance with 'TheQueens' ? Why did he didn't want her to find him ? Why all this secrecy? Why did he leave so many questions unanswered? With all these confusing thoughts she had fallen asleep .
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Next night they conversed and everything was back to normal . He made her laugh by telling her of many pranks the Marauders had played on the Slytherins. He told her of their latest prank played on the Slytherin house head , Prof. Samnerbee , their potions teacher . Though she chided him for playing jokes at the teacher she could not help but praise the Marauders ingenius tricks.
She never proded to know more about the Marauders except what he willfully revealed. She knew he had respected her secret so now she like wise respected his. As quickly as the other years her fifth year passed .
It was in her sixth year she felt her feelings totally change for Prongs. He was more than a friend to her . He knew her more than even her friends . But she didn't want to show these feelings because it might affect their friendship . She cherished all that passed between them . Like before she conversed freely to him . But she was cocnscious of a blush which crept to her face when she opened the diary . It was her most treasured possession . Every night she wrote in her diary faithfully whether he wrote back or not . She could not write in her dormitory . She was scared that her friends might catch the emotions on her face . She decided it would be best if she used the common room . She was sure no one would be there .
Every night she faithfully wrote something in her diary to which Prongs replied frequently though sometimes he wouldn't be there. This was one of those nights she didn't get a reply . But she remained in the room lost in her dreams . She sat near the fire. The fire was warm but not that strong .She could see how brightly the full moon shined . She fell asleep .She didn't hear the portrait swing open nor the people coming in . She didn't see a person watch her sleeping and how the flames made her hair turn various shades of red and auburn . She didn't know that someone carried her back to her dormitory . All she felt in the end was a tiny kiss on her cheeks and she softly whispered , " Prongs ."
Next morning , she woke up feeling relaxed . She did have a nice dream about Prongs and her... . She was brought back to this world when she saw where she was . How did she reach the dorms ? She remembered clearly that she was in the common room and she hadn't returned to the dorms yesterday. Then how did she wake up here ? Then she spotted the diary . It was on the bedside table. she opened the book afraid of what would be there . There was the answer she needed . It was written as usual in green ink :
" Hi Lils , sorry for not replying but you know that I was busy. But when I came back after accomplishing my task I found you asleep in the common room . So , I thought a lift to the dorms won't matter . I guess you 'll be reading this in the morning .Hope you had a good sleep and sweet dreams."
Lily blushed at the word sweet dreams . She read that note over and over again . She liked him and the way he called her Lils. It was his special nickname for her. She didn't know what he would think of her falling in
love with a person she never had seen . It seemed so unbelievable. But it was true!!
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Unfortunately, her friends found that something certainly had happened to Lily. Lately she seemed to be lost in some dream land . She still got top marks but something else had captured her attention . They noted that she would blush or start stuttering if the Marauders were mentioned . They were sure she knew something about them which they didn't . But they didn't want to offended her by asking her questions , so they left her alone.
One night Eliza could n't sleep and when she got up she noticed that Lily was writing something in her diary , the diary which Prongs had given her . Eliza was shocked that Lily still wrote to Prongs because she had thought Lily had stopped writing long back . She noticed how happy Lily looked as she was writing something . She was laughing after sometime. Then she heard Lily exclaiming ," Oh ! Prongs what a funny prank !! Hats off to The marauders." Now Eliza knew what had caused her friend to blush everytime the Marauders were mentioned. It was simply because of the fact that Prongs was part of the Marauders. She decided it would be best if she went to sleep before Lily found that she had accidently eavesdropped on her.
She told about her midnight's discovery to Felicity and Emma .They felt may be it would be better that they didn't interfere in Lily's personal matters. Nevertheless they were sure that Lily was in love .But exactly at that time Lily came in and heard what they said . She didn't pretend but told them honestly everything. They felt that Lily was certainly in a bad situation falling in love with a person who she had never seen. They gave her courage and comforted her . They advised her that she should wait till her seventh year and only after seeing him should she confess her feelings.
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Now she was glad she followed their advise or else she would have made a total fool of herself before him . She had waited for the seventh year full of
high expectations and dreams . But now everything was wasted . Not only she was cheated but also her heart was broken into peices. She wished she never had made friends with Prongs because now she knew who it was . How dare he do this to her ?How dare he ??? She couldn't complete the sentence as she broke again into tears.
The seventh year had been so full of surprises . She was made the Head girl and she had her own room and a shared common room with the head boy who turned out to be Potter to greatest disappointment . He did congratulate her on becoming the Head girl but she didn't say anything more than Thanks. They behaved formally and she never spoke to him unless it was necessary .
But she and Prongs continued their friendship. She reminded him that this year she would find out who he was .She remembered a question he had asked her . It was ," Lils would you break all what we shared if you find out that I am not what you expected?" She had replied happily that he could never be someone bad and she could never even imagine that . Now she knew why he had asked that question .
She was even more happy when the School Prefect Committee, decided to hold a masquerade ball again . She hoped that Prongs would ask her .
Just as she wished he asked her .This time being more daring she asked him why he wanted to go with her again? He replied that he felt that she was more worthy than any of the other girls to go out with him . He in return asked her that why she had agreed in coming out with him. She had answered that maybe because she found him better than all the guys she knew . Then they both progressed to set the time to meet each other .She said that since since she had a separate room now. It would be better if he would wait outside the heads' quaters which was behind the portrait of the Queen. He said he knew that portrait and would surely wait sharp 8 p.m for her.
For the next few days she saw every one were busy deciding on what to wear . She and her friends had went to Hogsmeade and made their purchase. This time she would have to dress alone because she couldn't invite her friends when the other head was in the common room . But she went with them to the gryffindor dorms and helped them get dressed .When she looked at the time it was already seven and she had to rush back to the heads' block.
She was really excited that she would see who Prongs was when he removed the mask .She waited anxiously and worried over every silly thing. What if Prongs didn't like her hair or her gown ? She was already late but when she came out of the portrair she saw that Prongs was waiting for her. He looked even taller and muscular than before and his hair was not scarlet but black. She thought of the boys in gryffindor who had black hair but many of them had .He held out his arm to her and said in a funny voice," Good evening Milady! care to come with me for the ball !"
She smiled and replied," Sure , Milord ! "
She looked at the big hall filled with so many students . The hall was decorated with lights and lanterns . It looked really breathtaking . First they all dined after that it was time to dance . He got up and asked her .She joined him at the dance floor . She was a bit nervous about dancing with him but she did . She felt herself shiver when he placed his hand on her waist and pull her closer to him . He told her so many times that she looked dazzling and beautiful. She felt more and more at ease with him .As the songs passed she found that more than dancing they were embracing .She had her hands around his neck and her head on his chest while his hands rested on her waist and his chin on top of her head .
Suddenly out of nowhere he asked if she would mind if they went out. She was sad that she had lost contact with him. But she replied that she would certainly do so . They left the big hall and went into the gardens. They could still hear the music being played inside. As they reached an isolated spot , they sat down on the bench and leaned close to one another .They gazed at the stars and the fairies dancing gracefully .They unknowingly linked their hands together while watching this magnificent scene.They heard the final song being played in the background and he got up .
He pulled her to him and she looked upto him. She could read in his eyes that he loved her as much as she did. She was soon lost in those blue eyes. He broke the spell by asking ,"Lils ,do you really want to see my face ?"
She simply said," Yes , more than anything . "
His hands were a bit shaky as he removed his mask . She was dumbstruck.
' No, no ,it can't be ....you are not him....' This was the last thought before she felt herself losing consciousness .
She had woken up in the hospital wing . She found that he was sitting beside her and holding her hand . She removed her hand as quickly as possible . He woke up and looked at her . She could not believe that this had happened to her. How could she love Prongs when he was one of the persons she disliked so much ? She felt weak but she got out of the bed. She didn't want to be in same room as him .
But he stopped her. "Lils , please listen."
She cut him by saying, "I don't want to hear anything . You are not Prongs. He cannot be you ......He is not supposed to be you . How can you cheat me like this James Potter ? How can you ??? " With these few words she ran out of the room and out of Hogwarts.
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Now coming back to the present ,she was lying on the bank of the lake wishing that she had dreamt everything . Hoping against hope that everything was a night mare and she has yet to be woken up. But she knew it was true. Prongs was James Potter. The reality was so hard to accept. Her brain didn't want to accept but it was the truth . 'Why did Prongs have to be him? In the first place why did James want to be her friend? Is it to make fun of her ? Is it because if some bet ?'
She tried to block all these mind boggling thoughts coming to her mind . She sat on the grass and looked at the how the water the lake was moving in form of ripples. The air was peaceful and calm . She saw some owls flying past the clouds and how the clouds parted to give access to the moon to cast it's rays on the lake. She saw some animals playing around except for a stag which looked as lonely as her. She approached it slowly from behind .
It turned around when it saw her reflection in the lake. It did not look frightened but rather sad. She took her hand and put it on it's head to soothe it. She felt like the presence of the stag reminded her of someone but she couldn't recollect. She felt herself warming to the stag. She started talking all what she wanted to get rid off her chest. Finally when she looked up .
She saw the stag engrossed as if it was listening to all what she said. She felt oddly comforted.
She poured out everything out , all her questions and all her feelings. She asked the stag if ever there was a fool like her ? How could she fall in love with a person she had never seen ? How could she forgive what he had done to her ? But above all that why did she love him still ? Does loving someone land you up in so much trouble ? She then broke into tears and covered her face with her hands.
She felt something fall in her lap. She saw that the stag was right in front of her and gazing at her intently. She looked into her lap , it was a necklace. She saw that it was one of the most beutiful ones she had ever seen . It had a heart- shaped pendant which was shining brightly .It was changing colours. She opened the pendent . What she saw made her eyes come out and left her speechless .
In the pendent it was written :
" To my little flower Lily,
Pledging everlasting love
Prongs"
She looked at the necklace lovingly but still she could not forget the fact that James the one she really disliked was Prongs. But why did he love her ? She looked at the stag and realised that instead of the stag there stood JAMES! She stood still as if she was struck by full body bind.
He came towards her and said ," Lils , I am really sorry . I never meant to hurt you so much. Why don't you listen to what I have to say? Please !"
She could only nod .
" I am sure you remember what had happened in our first year . I don't need to repeat it . I can tell you that since then I regretted what I said . Though I tried to apologise you never listened to me. I tried sending you notes yet you ignored me. I was really angry at myself for hurting you like that but what ever I tried had no effect on you. I noticed that you never made friends . It was as if you wanted to hide from everyone. I thought then it was best to leave you to yourself . So I never bothered any more with you .
By the time it was second year . Sirius, Remus , Peter and I formed
' The Marauders '. We enjoyed pranking and inventing new things. We made a Marauders map which showed us all the passages and rooms in Hogwarts. It also showed where a person was . Everyone by the time knew that Marauders were nothing like 'The Queens' who always helped people in trouble. Our only concern was to play pranks. We used my invisiblity cloak to do our pranks, steal into kitchen or go outside after our bed time. We really were bubbling with new ideas and plans .
One of those days I was feeling restless, I took my invisiblity cloak and the map and went out. I noticed that you and three other girls were out in the corridor .Along with you there was a boy who I knew was a first year and a scatter brain . When I reached there , I saw that instead of four girls there were four people with masks . I checked the map and I understood that there was something fishy. Then I saw what you four where doing . You were helping the boy back to the gryffindor tower. I followed you all the way back to the common room. Then I heard the boy saying thanks to you and when he asked you all your names.I remember clearly how you answered ," Lamark you can call us the Queens . We'll be there always for you if you want any help. "
From that time I admired you . I was truely surprised that you was one of
the Queens. I had never seen you with friends .You were always alone. But then I guessed that it was a way to cover yourself. Then a plan formed in my
mind . I badly wanted to be your friend but if I approached you and said that you would certainly disagree . So I started sending you owls and signing myself as Prongs which was my nickname among the Marauders. As the years passed and we had become firm friends . I thought of telling you. But indirectly I wanted to know what your reaction would be. So I asked you that question if you hate anyone. The answer I got made me stick to my first idea of never letting you know who I am . When you also made me promise about never letting anyone know that it was you who got first every year . I understood the way you disliked me was lasting and still fresh in your mind . Then I was sure that I would have to wait some years before making my appearance.
After that I can't point out exactly when and how my feelings for you changed. You were so different from other girls . I wanted you more than a friend .Luckily for me the masquerade ball came. I asked if you had any boyfriends . Believe me never was I more relieved than when you wrote you didn't have any. I took hold of all my courage and asked if you could come with me and you said you would . I was so happy that I would get to spend an evening with you . But then thoughts came to me if you would know it was me later . So , I got the idea of charming every one's hair scarlet . Sirius , Remus and Peter helped me in getting all the boys to agree .
When I saw you that day I was really surprised . I can say that you looked gorgeous .Everything about you was perfect . I had a real good time with you at the ball . When I had to say good night ,I couldn't resist giving you that kiss. I somehow forced myself to go or else I would have messed up everything. In class , I could not resist staring at you and how Sirius teased
me . But he didn't see your face that day ,he never knew how charming and funny you are nor did he know that the Flower had stolen Prongs heart .
Of course you never noticed anything , you were in your own world. You never noticed how I used to steal glances at you nor how I used to watch you working in the common room .You were oblivious about everything. Then I think it was in the sixth year that you started coming at midnight to the common room . My first thought was that you were coming to meet your boy friend.
I watched the map but no one came . I had earlier opened my diary and
now I saw that words were being written on it . Then I understood that you wanted to either escape your friends' questioning or else you have
started feeling something else that you are scared that some one would find out .
I don't think you noticed that I never write on full moon days. It was because I used to be outside with my friends. I am an unregistered animagus along with my friends. One of us is a werewolf and this was the best way to keep him company . On one of those nights when we all returned in the morning we found you were sleeping in the common room . I told them to go to sleep while I remained sometime looking at you. You really looked like a little flower which was blooming even though asleep. I then picked you up and took you back to your dorm . I didn't want to leave you but I had to go. But before going I kissed you on your cheek again and I was really surprised that you whispered Prongs. I left feeling elated that you said my name but when I reached my room I saw my friends were looking at me and smiling broadly. I saw Sirius was holding a diary while Remus was holding my invisibility cloak. Then it clicked in my mind that they had watched me and found out about the diary. I didn't say anything but grinned foolishly at them . They now were sure that Prongs had lost his heart .
All those christmas presents and birthday gifts you sent me are there still with me .When I saw the Hogwarts letter saying that I was to be the Head boy I was not that happy. But that night when you mentioned that you were the Head girl ,I couldn't believe my eyes. I knew that means I could see you every day and may be even when you write the diary . I was looking forward to come back . The year started out well though I was busy with everything ; studies , Quidditch , pranks and meetings . But every day I could see you .
Then came mid term and the masquerade ball . I wanted to ask you but I knew that this time you would want to see who I was. I was almost sure when I asked you would give a positive reply and you did. The ball was really nice and you looked so ravishingly beautiful that I had no time than look at you. During the dance ,when you laid your head on my chest I was so grateful and may be I started hoping that you would like me back no matter who I was . I looked at the time and I knew that after that song the ball would close and everyone was expected to remove their mask . I didn't want to give you a shock in front of everyone so I took you to the gardens. But when I removed my mask and revealed who I was .I saw that you had fainted without even telling me a word .
I took you to the hospital wing and I stayed with you. I blamed myself for all that had happened. I wanted to give you that necklace. But my hopes were crushed when you woke up and said all that and left me .
Lils , without you there is no Prongs .Without you there is no James. I wanted you to be my everything but I know I was wrong . I should have never become your friend then all this wouldn't have happened . It's all my fault." James stopped his narration at this point . He turned his head to hide the emotion he was feeling.
Lily who had been hearing all this knew what he said was true . She no longer felt angry with him . She felt something just the opposite . She somehow had a peculiar feeling that everything was going to be alright . She didn't know what exactly to say. But she knew that the James who she thought was James was not James at all .
She had been blind all along. She had never given a chance to James to prove himself . She has been prejudiced against him just because of that single fault he had comitted as a child in the first year. She felt ashamed that after belonging to a group which was famous for helping and guiding others .She herself had been so wrong. She had judged James so harshly . She wanted to ask his forgiveness . This James was a great person in her eyes much above her ,much .....much above her . He was the person who cared for her all these years. James was Prongs......h..h.....her......her Prongs !!!
She went towards him and put her hand on his shoulder . He turned and looked at her . She couldn't say anything but she looked into his eyes . He saw tears falling slowly from her eyes . He slowly raised his hand and wiped them off. She didn't still say anything but she just held out the necklace to him. He took it wordlessly from her .Then she spoke , " Pr...Pr..J..James , The only thing I c..c..can say now is th...th..that I am not w...worthy of you. I n...need your f...f..forgiveness.. I a..am so so...sorry . I do...don't deserve you .I don't deser....."
James stopped her from saying more by hugging her tightly . She hugged back . Both of them were crying yet they knew that they'll be happy forever. After what seemed seconds to them James pulled back . He then slowly put the necklace on her neck . It shone brillantly . She looked shyly into his eyes and she saw the question there .
She nodded .
That was what he wanted .
He lowered his head while she lifted herself on her toes. They both moved at the same time spontaneously . Soon they were both lip locked . It was a gentle yet passionate . It was their first kiss....a kiss more powerful and more moving than all the magic they had ever done before.... It took them some time to stop and when they did so.
Lily simpy asked ," James, will you love me forever , even after I die ?"
He cupped her face in his arms and said, " As long as the stars shine and heavens last , James would be Lily's forever .for....ever !!!!"
A.N: I am feeling so happy after finishing this fic . I love happy endings. I am really writing this as a sort of a prequel for another fic which concerns H/G . I am a big fan of L/J , H/G and R/Hr.
For those who don't mind H/G you should read that fic .The name of the fic is 'SECRETS DISSOLVED.' I have finished six chapters. But when I was writing the seventh chapter .This idea came into my mind. I couldn't resist but write this. I'll edit this may be after some time as at present my MS word is not working.
Please don't forget to REVIEW and tell me whether you liked this story or not? Everything is welcome !!
A.N : This fic is dedicated to all fans of Magic and to this great fandom !!!
This my first attempt at a L/J relationship . I don't how much I have succeeded in doing the afore mentioned desire but may be you all can let me know through your REVIEWS !!!
Summary : This fic is about Lily and James . It is set in the final half of their seventh year . It is a mixed bag of a little bit of fluff , romance , drama and angst .
LOVE me forever !!!
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" Lily "
" Lily "
" Where are you ? "
Lily heard the voices calling for her . But she didn't want anyone to see her at the moment . She was tired of everything and wanted to recompose herself especially after yesterday's events .
She had sent a letter to Prof . Dumbledore and had asked permission to stay out on the grounds for the evening after class . Obviously he allowed , otherwise she wouldn't be here . She was the Head girl and was supposed to be the last person to break the rules . Though this didn't apply to a certain messy black haired boy she knew .
' Oh God ! I want to forget everything that happened then why am I constantly reminded of him ? 'she thought grimly.
' O.k , Lily calm yourself and forget , simply forget about that person . Think about your past years at Hogwarts school of Wizardry .'
She looked back on her years spent at Hogwarts . It was filled with lots of memorable events . To begin with , she was a muggle born and hadn't expected the Hogwarts' letter . Her parents were sweet about it and were really proud of having a witch in the family . Her main goal was to make her parents really happy so she worked very hard and concentrated on being the best student in her year . So instead of making friends , laugh , joke and play around she dedicated her time for studies .
If it had not been for Felicity , Emma and Eliza she would have been alone . She knew they were real , sincere friends who were there for her always . She had accidentally made friends with them and now they four were the inseparables ! They called themselves ' the Queens ' They were best known for their kind and helping mentality rather than pranks exactly opposite to the Mar......
' Again why I am I thinking of that person's group ?
Lily take a hold of yourself and forget about him and his what so ever ! '
She went back to that accident .
It was her first year and she had come back late to her dormitory because she had been deeply absorbed in the book she had been reading . When she entered she saw already every one was in bed except for the bed nearest to her own . It was of a girl named Emma . She had never cared of talking much with her dorm mates except for civility needed . But some how she was sure that one of them had fallen in trouble . So she left her dorm and went out of the common room . She asked the portraits about the missing girl and went to find her.
Then she saw Emma lying on the floor in the corridor . She was having fits . She had read about fits and she knew medical assistance was urgent . She ran back . Fortunately , she ran into Prof. Dumbledore who immediately took Emma to the Hospital wing .
Lily hoped that the girl would get better and wanted to stay in the wing but Madame Pomfrey sent her back to her dorm . Prof. Dumbledore was impressed and had given her 15 points . She didn't care much about the points but rather wished that Emma would get well .
Next evening after the classes she went to visit Emma who had now recovered her consiousness . When she reached there , she saw two other girls busily talking with Emma . She didn't want to interupt them so she slowly decided to withdraw but at that instant Madame Pomfrey came in and said , " I see your back , Lily ! "
The girls stopped talking and looked curiously at her .
Madame went on, "Emma , I guess you know Lily . She had found you yesterday and helped you here otherwise you would have been in a more worser condition . "
Lily asked quietly , " So how are you feeling now ? "
" Much better , thank you . " Emma replied politely.
Soon Madame Pomfrey took the patients' temperature and checked her properly . But before leaving she warned the three visitors not to overstrain their friend . As soon as Madame Pomfrey left Lily wanted to leave . So she said ," O.k then bye , I got to go . "
The other three looked at each other and nodded . Emma shifted slightly on her bed and said , " Lily just wait a sec , I wanted to thank you for saving my life . Since I was a child I have had this problem . Yesterday was one of my worst attacks , if it wasn't for you I don't know what would have happened . "
Lily smiled gently and said , " I am glad that I was there . I didn't do anything much , besides anyone in my position would have done the same . "
The other girl whose name was Eliza added , " Lily , why do you run away from us ? We want to be your friend ."
Lily was taken aback . No one had spoken to her like this . This was the first time somebody wanted to be her friend .
She then heard Felicity saying , " We wanted to be from the very first day but you always ignored us . We know you are kind , soft hearted and affectionate . What ever others think you are , it does not matter to us . We just want to be your friends . So friends ? "
Lily looked at their faces and saw how earnest they were . She grinned and held out her hand . Soon Emma , Eliza and Felicity were laughing and cracking jokes with Lily . From one of their jokes they got the name for their small group as 'the Queens.'
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She knew that it was them who were searching for her just now . Their voices now certainly seemed faded . She hoped that they got her owl telling them that she'll be coming in only later and no one was to wait for her . But she knew her friends . They would always come in search for her to cheer her up especially if they had heard what happened earlier . But at the present she was in no mood or ready to see anyone for that matter .
She then thought of all the fun they had . They understood her much better than anyone else . They used to give her enough and more time to study and pulled her away from books if she spent too much time with it . They used to never force her to come forward because was quite a shy person who didn't like much attention . They made her an honourary member of 'the Queens'. It was for her sake they decided to wear masks when they helped anyone . Many used to wonder why they were so secretive but they knew if they revealed themselves they would surely be heroines but would loose Lily as their friend . Also 'The Queens' knew better and wanted to do service not for gaining popularity but for the true meaning of service .
Another secret hidden from others was that it was her who used to secure first in her form . She hated being centre of attention . So , she had made
Prof . Dumbledore promise that he would never tell anyone except for her parents about it . So every year her class mates were suprised when they saw the yearly position list . This list consisted of three positions and to each were assigned a name depending on the highest scores . They always noticed that the name at the first position was a blank , second was that irritating person's name and third was a boy from Slytherin .
She thought how she had started hating that fellow . From the very first day,
she didn't like to mix up much and never talked to anyone . She used to just keep quiet and listen carefully in the class . The teachers were specially instructed never to ask her questions . But that person with his three other friends got on her nerves . It was none other than the most popular James Potter ,Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew .Their main hobby was teasing and pranking others . She was very sensitive about her looks . She was constantly vexed of her red hair and tiny freckles around her nose .
But one day that spoilt brat took hold of her long red braid and called her , "Carrots,carrots!" She never felt so angry ever before in her life and she immediately reacted violently . Before he could say Quidditch she had emptied her bottle of ink on his hair . She saw how the ink fell onto his shoulders and slowly drip down his forehead . She felt bad at losing her temper before the whole class .Luckily for her no teacher was around .All she wanted to do then was to break into tears but didn't want to satisfy that fool that he had made her cry and break a rule. She just barged out of her class and ran to a secret hideout the Queens had .
She had from that moment vowed that never again will she talk with Potter . Her friends had followed her and comforted her .They told her to be strong and forget about it . They took her back to class . She totally ignored him and the notes he sent her. All she did when she got the notes was to tear them up without even opening them .She knew it was the best method to ignore .
She was soon abandoned by the other girls who were great fans of Potter and his crazy friends . But it didn't matter to her because she never was friends with anyone of them . She had the friends that mattered to her .
They would never forsake her since they truely knew her inside - out.
Though her friends tried to make peace . It never worked because Potter had hurt her pride deeply . She took it as her charisma to defeat him in studies, i.e to be always one step ahead of him . She used to notice how sullen his face was when the yearly lists came showing he was always second and a blank was present in the first position . He never could find out the mystery behind the blank in the year mark lists . He tried many ways but that was something he could never decipher .She was really satisfied that there was something James Potter couldn't find out .
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According to most of the girls in her year .He and his friends were great heros . It seemed as if they knew everything right from all passages and stairs to even go out of school without being observed . She wanted James to fall in trouble but she didn't think it brave to split on people whether they are your enemies or not . She was not of the malicious type so for her securing the first positon every year was revenge itself . She was always succesful in that to this day that is a warm day in her seventh year .
She continued thinking of the events .Now she was ready to pass on to her second year . She remembered that this was the year 'The Marauders' started their pranks . Nobody had a clue about who they were but their pranks were real top class . Most of their pranks were directed at the Slytherins so everyone supported them . They were really popular even more than Potter who was now a Quidditch seeker . She was quite content by that fact .
She still remembered how funny Snape , the boy who usually was the third in class looked when he came to the Big Hall . His hair had changed from black to green and he had a green halo saying that ' I love Marauders' on his head . Everyone had burst out laughing except for herself and her friends as they never liked seeing anyone in distress . It was with a great effort that they restrained themselves from laughing but they certainly knew that the Marauders were really brave and clever who ever they were .
But by the time it had reached the third year .She started receiving some sort of anonymous letters repeating the same message . At first she ignored them thinking it was some joke being played on her but later realised that the person was serious . All of the owls were written in green ink .
She showed the letters to her friends . Eliza took one of them and started reading :
Dear Lily ,
It would be nice if you could be my pen pal . I find you that you have every quality that I search for in a true friend . This letter is not meant to imposing but I don't want to disclose my identity . Please leave a note in the owlery informing me of your decision .
Waiting in hope ,
Your's truely,
PRONGS
After Eliza finished reading ,they had a discussion about it .They came to the conclusion that the person was certainly a boy who wanted to have a good friend to talk to about his problems . Anyway they were sure he was a decent fellow . They felt that there would be no harm in conversing or helping a stranger . Besides it would be good to interact with a boy .
So she left a note in the owlery telling Prongs that she would like to be a friend of his . Within a week an owl came to her with a package . It was a diary with a note on the first page . It said :
Dear Lily ,
I am happy to know that you have accepted my offer for
friendship . Inorder that we converse whenever we can I would like you to use this diary . It is enchanted . I have another diary of the same kind .
So when you write something I'll be able to respond just like as if we were talking . What do you think about it ?
Your new friend ,
PRONGS
p.s : Write in the diary only when the clock strikes twelve at midnight so that I'll be able to reply simultaneously .
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She remembered the many hundreds of conversations she had with that anonymous stranger . The diary had become a part of her life . Even during vacations she would use it and the stranger would reply . The stranger had revealed a lot about himself but still she couldn't find him . She knew it was someone in her school and it was a boy . He was certainly very nice , fun loving and clever . She recollected once that she had asked him when will they meet and he said only by the end of their seventh year . Then she knew it was a boy of her same age .
It was in her fourth year , the anonymous Prongs asked her if she was a member of the Queens . He said he was sure about that even if she denied. She wrote back in the diary that since he was so cock sure about it , she would not waste time denying it . She also wrote that he shouldn't mention this to anyone . He promised that he would not . Though he asked more about
'the Queens', she refused to tell more than that the Queens would help people in trouble especially the smaller ones .
She then ventured to ask if he knew anything about ' The Marauders .' He wrote back that he knew too much about them . He asked her whether she liked the pranks they played . She replied that she did enjoy some of them like the ones played at the Slytherins . But she couldn't accept the pranks played on the other students and teachers .
So after being friends with Prongs for so long . It became a tradition to leave gifts for christmas at the owlery . He really did know how to select gifts and she treasured everything she got from him. They both were real good friends and shared a golden friendship. She told him about her childhood days and about her likes and dislikes. It was at that time he had asked if she hated some one . She told him that she could never hate people except for Voldemort . He wrote back that everyone hated Voldemort including him and when he grows up he wants to be an Auror to defeat this dark wizard .
She continued writing and made it clear that though she didn't hate people she really disliked the Slytherins who called her mudblood and some boys in her class . When he asked her who those unlucky boys were . She told him it was James Potter and his gang . She then wrote in the diary how Potter had hurt her feelings excruciatingly . But Prongs asked her if James had ever asked forgiveness . She affirmed that he did two or three times . But she could never forgive him .
Prongs said he was a bit disappionted because he had thought that she would always listen to reasons and forgive childish pranks .He continued by writing that it was wrong to keep grudges especially if she belonged to ' The Queens ' who are supposed to epitomes of benevolence and forgiveness .She replied that though she had got many chances to take revenge on him she never did . She thought her own small way of getting revenge was much better than offending people in public. He was obviously curious and hence asked in what way did she take her revenge .
She first of all made him promise never to reveal anything about she was going to say to the class or his other friends. She then explained that every year how funny it was to see Potter see his name second in the year lists with a blank on the first position . Then she wrote that it was really her who got the highest marks in the class but she had requested Prof . Dumbledore never to let anyone know that . Prongs said that she was really funny finding such a nice way of taking revenge without actually betraying 'The Queens ' good ideals .
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Then she thought how their relationship blossomed and she was really grateful for his friendship.It was in her fifth year he asked me if she had any boy friends.Though this question was unexpected she replied that she did have many especially many from the first year and second year. He wrote back that it was not that he meant which she very well knew. Then she replied honestly that she didn't have any except for him .She jokily asked why did he ask her such a silly question. He then replied that he wanted to ask her for the masquerade ball coming up next week.
She was happy that she would get to meet him . She answered that though she had been asked by many she secretly hoped that he would ask her. It was a good opportunity to see him without actually knowing who he was. He wrote back that he would meet her sharp eight in the gryffindor common room and also asked her not to wear her mask so that he could find her . It was at that moment she understood that the anonymous Prongs was a gryffindor. She was really surprised but she had never noticed any of Gryffindor boys paying attention to her. This Prongs was a real mystery .
She was really excited for the ball . It was the first time that her friends persuaded her to bring out the real Lily . She used to hate showing her true self and since she was first in her class she used charms which would keep her plain in front of others. Now she removed all those charms . She noted with satisfaction how her hair had changed over the years from red to auburn and how those tiny freckles added a glow to her face.
She wore a green flowing gown with her hair left loose . It brought out the colour of her eyes . She then helped Eliza do her hair and after that did the hair for both Emma and Felicity. All of then looked beautiful . The other girls who usually ignored them looked dumbstruck especially at Lily who looked marvellous . Lily then helped her friends put their masks.She didn't put hers as she first had to meet Prongs . She thought of how she could find more about him maybe look at the colour of his hair and search that same colour after wards.That was certainly a good idea.
As she went down the stairs of the girls dormitories she looked around but she noticed that all the boys who were persent there had the same colour hair. All of them changed their hair scarlet to show that they are Gryffindors she guessed . It was a bit annoying that her plan had failed even before it started .
Then she saw him ,Prongs coming towards her.He certainly looked tall and handsome in his green dress robes. It was a coincidence that both of them wore the same colour.
He came towards her and said softly,his voice a bit muffled because of the mask," Hi Lily , It's me Prongs. "
She replied ,"Hi Prongs . Nice to meet you."
He looked at her and said , " I guess now you can wear your mask . Do you have it ? "
She held up the mask and answered ,"Yes , here's it ."
He asked gently,"Should I help you with it ?"
She looked around and saw her friends giving her thumbs up . She said ,"Yes."
She covered her face by the mask and held out the string at the back for him to tie. While tying her mask he said ,"You have beautiful hair!"
She flushed as he said this and said , " Thanks."
He then offered her his arm and the went to the big hall. She felt self- conscious but she managed to forget everything and think of only the person with her . He did look handsome in a special way. She knew so much about him yet so little . She knew his likes ,dislikes and all about him but she didn't know who he was . She felt wonderful in his arms . He really did know how to dance . They talked and danced a lot . Finally when it was time for everyone to remove their masks , they slipped off . He took her to the Gryffindor common room . She saw that it was time everyone started
returning .So she hastily said, " Prongs won't you give a clue about who you are ?"
He smiled at her innocence and said ," o.k I'll give you a clue but you must n't
try to find me till our seventh year . You must n't even tell your three friends."
She was flabbbergasted and said, " How do you know so much? I never told you that I had only three friends."
He replied knowingly, " What did you think when I said I know that you are a member of 'The Queens', that I didn't know who your friends were? Though you never show out much Lily I do know all about you ."
He looked into her eyes and said , " This is your clue : I am one of the members of ' the Marauders' ."
After saying this he placed a tiny kiss on her cheek and whispered a good night and left for the boys' dormitories.
She stood there holding her cheek where he had just kissed . She then walked back to her room. She changed into her night dress and looked at the time. It was exactly a minute passed twelve. She opened her diary and wrote, " Are you really one of the Marauders ? "
There was no reply.
She thought when Prongs didn't reply it meant he wasn't there. Now she could guess that since he was a part of ' The Marauders ' he must be busy pranking or something . She was amused that a person like that wanted to be her friend . She was not that popular , not that beautiful or at least she didn't want people behind her because of her looks or the fact she was brainy .
She had wanted a person who would understand her .Here was Prongs who had seeked her out and became a good friend. But after meeting him it turned out to be something more . Will she be able to converse to him like before? Maybe if she forget that he had kissed her . But what if it was just a friendly kiss and nothing more ?' Yes , just think that it was !!'
But why did Prongs come into her life? Why did he want to be her friend ?
Is it to form some sort of an alliance with 'TheQueens' ? Why did he didn't want her to find him ? Why all this secrecy? Why did he leave so many questions unanswered? With all these confusing thoughts she had fallen asleep .
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Next night they conversed and everything was back to normal . He made her laugh by telling her of many pranks the Marauders had played on the Slytherins. He told her of their latest prank played on the Slytherin house head , Prof. Samnerbee , their potions teacher . Though she chided him for playing jokes at the teacher she could not help but praise the Marauders ingenius tricks.
She never proded to know more about the Marauders except what he willfully revealed. She knew he had respected her secret so now she like wise respected his. As quickly as the other years her fifth year passed .
It was in her sixth year she felt her feelings totally change for Prongs. He was more than a friend to her . He knew her more than even her friends . But she didn't want to show these feelings because it might affect their friendship . She cherished all that passed between them . Like before she conversed freely to him . But she was cocnscious of a blush which crept to her face when she opened the diary . It was her most treasured possession . Every night she wrote in her diary faithfully whether he wrote back or not . She could not write in her dormitory . She was scared that her friends might catch the emotions on her face . She decided it would be best if she used the common room . She was sure no one would be there .
Every night she faithfully wrote something in her diary to which Prongs replied frequently though sometimes he wouldn't be there. This was one of those nights she didn't get a reply . But she remained in the room lost in her dreams . She sat near the fire. The fire was warm but not that strong .She could see how brightly the full moon shined . She fell asleep .She didn't hear the portrait swing open nor the people coming in . She didn't see a person watch her sleeping and how the flames made her hair turn various shades of red and auburn . She didn't know that someone carried her back to her dormitory . All she felt in the end was a tiny kiss on her cheeks and she softly whispered , " Prongs ."
Next morning , she woke up feeling relaxed . She did have a nice dream about Prongs and her... . She was brought back to this world when she saw where she was . How did she reach the dorms ? She remembered clearly that she was in the common room and she hadn't returned to the dorms yesterday. Then how did she wake up here ? Then she spotted the diary . It was on the bedside table. she opened the book afraid of what would be there . There was the answer she needed . It was written as usual in green ink :
" Hi Lils , sorry for not replying but you know that I was busy. But when I came back after accomplishing my task I found you asleep in the common room . So , I thought a lift to the dorms won't matter . I guess you 'll be reading this in the morning .Hope you had a good sleep and sweet dreams."
Lily blushed at the word sweet dreams . She read that note over and over again . She liked him and the way he called her Lils. It was his special nickname for her. She didn't know what he would think of her falling in
love with a person she never had seen . It seemed so unbelievable. But it was true!!
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Unfortunately, her friends found that something certainly had happened to Lily. Lately she seemed to be lost in some dream land . She still got top marks but something else had captured her attention . They noted that she would blush or start stuttering if the Marauders were mentioned . They were sure she knew something about them which they didn't . But they didn't want to offended her by asking her questions , so they left her alone.
One night Eliza could n't sleep and when she got up she noticed that Lily was writing something in her diary , the diary which Prongs had given her . Eliza was shocked that Lily still wrote to Prongs because she had thought Lily had stopped writing long back . She noticed how happy Lily looked as she was writing something . She was laughing after sometime. Then she heard Lily exclaiming ," Oh ! Prongs what a funny prank !! Hats off to The marauders." Now Eliza knew what had caused her friend to blush everytime the Marauders were mentioned. It was simply because of the fact that Prongs was part of the Marauders. She decided it would be best if she went to sleep before Lily found that she had accidently eavesdropped on her.
She told about her midnight's discovery to Felicity and Emma .They felt may be it would be better that they didn't interfere in Lily's personal matters. Nevertheless they were sure that Lily was in love .But exactly at that time Lily came in and heard what they said . She didn't pretend but told them honestly everything. They felt that Lily was certainly in a bad situation falling in love with a person who she had never seen. They gave her courage and comforted her . They advised her that she should wait till her seventh year and only after seeing him should she confess her feelings.
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Now she was glad she followed their advise or else she would have made a total fool of herself before him . She had waited for the seventh year full of
high expectations and dreams . But now everything was wasted . Not only she was cheated but also her heart was broken into peices. She wished she never had made friends with Prongs because now she knew who it was . How dare he do this to her ?How dare he ??? She couldn't complete the sentence as she broke again into tears.
The seventh year had been so full of surprises . She was made the Head girl and she had her own room and a shared common room with the head boy who turned out to be Potter to greatest disappointment . He did congratulate her on becoming the Head girl but she didn't say anything more than Thanks. They behaved formally and she never spoke to him unless it was necessary .
But she and Prongs continued their friendship. She reminded him that this year she would find out who he was .She remembered a question he had asked her . It was ," Lils would you break all what we shared if you find out that I am not what you expected?" She had replied happily that he could never be someone bad and she could never even imagine that . Now she knew why he had asked that question .
She was even more happy when the School Prefect Committee, decided to hold a masquerade ball again . She hoped that Prongs would ask her .
Just as she wished he asked her .This time being more daring she asked him why he wanted to go with her again? He replied that he felt that she was more worthy than any of the other girls to go out with him . He in return asked her that why she had agreed in coming out with him. She had answered that maybe because she found him better than all the guys she knew . Then they both progressed to set the time to meet each other .She said that since since she had a separate room now. It would be better if he would wait outside the heads' quaters which was behind the portrait of the Queen. He said he knew that portrait and would surely wait sharp 8 p.m for her.
For the next few days she saw every one were busy deciding on what to wear . She and her friends had went to Hogsmeade and made their purchase. This time she would have to dress alone because she couldn't invite her friends when the other head was in the common room . But she went with them to the gryffindor dorms and helped them get dressed .When she looked at the time it was already seven and she had to rush back to the heads' block.
She was really excited that she would see who Prongs was when he removed the mask .She waited anxiously and worried over every silly thing. What if Prongs didn't like her hair or her gown ? She was already late but when she came out of the portrair she saw that Prongs was waiting for her. He looked even taller and muscular than before and his hair was not scarlet but black. She thought of the boys in gryffindor who had black hair but many of them had .He held out his arm to her and said in a funny voice," Good evening Milady! care to come with me for the ball !"
She smiled and replied," Sure , Milord ! "
She looked at the big hall filled with so many students . The hall was decorated with lights and lanterns . It looked really breathtaking . First they all dined after that it was time to dance . He got up and asked her .She joined him at the dance floor . She was a bit nervous about dancing with him but she did . She felt herself shiver when he placed his hand on her waist and pull her closer to him . He told her so many times that she looked dazzling and beautiful. She felt more and more at ease with him .As the songs passed she found that more than dancing they were embracing .She had her hands around his neck and her head on his chest while his hands rested on her waist and his chin on top of her head .
Suddenly out of nowhere he asked if she would mind if they went out. She was sad that she had lost contact with him. But she replied that she would certainly do so . They left the big hall and went into the gardens. They could still hear the music being played inside. As they reached an isolated spot , they sat down on the bench and leaned close to one another .They gazed at the stars and the fairies dancing gracefully .They unknowingly linked their hands together while watching this magnificent scene.They heard the final song being played in the background and he got up .
He pulled her to him and she looked upto him. She could read in his eyes that he loved her as much as she did. She was soon lost in those blue eyes. He broke the spell by asking ,"Lils ,do you really want to see my face ?"
She simply said," Yes , more than anything . "
His hands were a bit shaky as he removed his mask . She was dumbstruck.
' No, no ,it can't be ....you are not him....' This was the last thought before she felt herself losing consciousness .
She had woken up in the hospital wing . She found that he was sitting beside her and holding her hand . She removed her hand as quickly as possible . He woke up and looked at her . She could not believe that this had happened to her. How could she love Prongs when he was one of the persons she disliked so much ? She felt weak but she got out of the bed. She didn't want to be in same room as him .
But he stopped her. "Lils , please listen."
She cut him by saying, "I don't want to hear anything . You are not Prongs. He cannot be you ......He is not supposed to be you . How can you cheat me like this James Potter ? How can you ??? " With these few words she ran out of the room and out of Hogwarts.
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Now coming back to the present ,she was lying on the bank of the lake wishing that she had dreamt everything . Hoping against hope that everything was a night mare and she has yet to be woken up. But she knew it was true. Prongs was James Potter. The reality was so hard to accept. Her brain didn't want to accept but it was the truth . 'Why did Prongs have to be him? In the first place why did James want to be her friend? Is it to make fun of her ? Is it because if some bet ?'
She tried to block all these mind boggling thoughts coming to her mind . She sat on the grass and looked at the how the water the lake was moving in form of ripples. The air was peaceful and calm . She saw some owls flying past the clouds and how the clouds parted to give access to the moon to cast it's rays on the lake. She saw some animals playing around except for a stag which looked as lonely as her. She approached it slowly from behind .
It turned around when it saw her reflection in the lake. It did not look frightened but rather sad. She took her hand and put it on it's head to soothe it. She felt like the presence of the stag reminded her of someone but she couldn't recollect. She felt herself warming to the stag. She started talking all what she wanted to get rid off her chest. Finally when she looked up .
She saw the stag engrossed as if it was listening to all what she said. She felt oddly comforted.
She poured out everything out , all her questions and all her feelings. She asked the stag if ever there was a fool like her ? How could she fall in love with a person she had never seen ? How could she forgive what he had done to her ? But above all that why did she love him still ? Does loving someone land you up in so much trouble ? She then broke into tears and covered her face with her hands.
She felt something fall in her lap. She saw that the stag was right in front of her and gazing at her intently. She looked into her lap , it was a necklace. She saw that it was one of the most beutiful ones she had ever seen . It had a heart- shaped pendant which was shining brightly .It was changing colours. She opened the pendent . What she saw made her eyes come out and left her speechless .
In the pendent it was written :
" To my little flower Lily,
Pledging everlasting love
Prongs"
She looked at the necklace lovingly but still she could not forget the fact that James the one she really disliked was Prongs. But why did he love her ? She looked at the stag and realised that instead of the stag there stood JAMES! She stood still as if she was struck by full body bind.
He came towards her and said ," Lils , I am really sorry . I never meant to hurt you so much. Why don't you listen to what I have to say? Please !"
She could only nod .
" I am sure you remember what had happened in our first year . I don't need to repeat it . I can tell you that since then I regretted what I said . Though I tried to apologise you never listened to me. I tried sending you notes yet you ignored me. I was really angry at myself for hurting you like that but what ever I tried had no effect on you. I noticed that you never made friends . It was as if you wanted to hide from everyone. I thought then it was best to leave you to yourself . So I never bothered any more with you .
By the time it was second year . Sirius, Remus , Peter and I formed
' The Marauders '. We enjoyed pranking and inventing new things. We made a Marauders map which showed us all the passages and rooms in Hogwarts. It also showed where a person was . Everyone by the time knew that Marauders were nothing like 'The Queens' who always helped people in trouble. Our only concern was to play pranks. We used my invisiblity cloak to do our pranks, steal into kitchen or go outside after our bed time. We really were bubbling with new ideas and plans .
One of those days I was feeling restless, I took my invisiblity cloak and the map and went out. I noticed that you and three other girls were out in the corridor .Along with you there was a boy who I knew was a first year and a scatter brain . When I reached there , I saw that instead of four girls there were four people with masks . I checked the map and I understood that there was something fishy. Then I saw what you four where doing . You were helping the boy back to the gryffindor tower. I followed you all the way back to the common room. Then I heard the boy saying thanks to you and when he asked you all your names.I remember clearly how you answered ," Lamark you can call us the Queens . We'll be there always for you if you want any help. "
From that time I admired you . I was truely surprised that you was one of
the Queens. I had never seen you with friends .You were always alone. But then I guessed that it was a way to cover yourself. Then a plan formed in my
mind . I badly wanted to be your friend but if I approached you and said that you would certainly disagree . So I started sending you owls and signing myself as Prongs which was my nickname among the Marauders. As the years passed and we had become firm friends . I thought of telling you. But indirectly I wanted to know what your reaction would be. So I asked you that question if you hate anyone. The answer I got made me stick to my first idea of never letting you know who I am . When you also made me promise about never letting anyone know that it was you who got first every year . I understood the way you disliked me was lasting and still fresh in your mind . Then I was sure that I would have to wait some years before making my appearance.
After that I can't point out exactly when and how my feelings for you changed. You were so different from other girls . I wanted you more than a friend .Luckily for me the masquerade ball came. I asked if you had any boyfriends . Believe me never was I more relieved than when you wrote you didn't have any. I took hold of all my courage and asked if you could come with me and you said you would . I was so happy that I would get to spend an evening with you . But then thoughts came to me if you would know it was me later . So , I got the idea of charming every one's hair scarlet . Sirius , Remus and Peter helped me in getting all the boys to agree .
When I saw you that day I was really surprised . I can say that you looked gorgeous .Everything about you was perfect . I had a real good time with you at the ball . When I had to say good night ,I couldn't resist giving you that kiss. I somehow forced myself to go or else I would have messed up everything. In class , I could not resist staring at you and how Sirius teased
me . But he didn't see your face that day ,he never knew how charming and funny you are nor did he know that the Flower had stolen Prongs heart .
Of course you never noticed anything , you were in your own world. You never noticed how I used to steal glances at you nor how I used to watch you working in the common room .You were oblivious about everything. Then I think it was in the sixth year that you started coming at midnight to the common room . My first thought was that you were coming to meet your boy friend.
I watched the map but no one came . I had earlier opened my diary and
now I saw that words were being written on it . Then I understood that you wanted to either escape your friends' questioning or else you have
started feeling something else that you are scared that some one would find out .
I don't think you noticed that I never write on full moon days. It was because I used to be outside with my friends. I am an unregistered animagus along with my friends. One of us is a werewolf and this was the best way to keep him company . On one of those nights when we all returned in the morning we found you were sleeping in the common room . I told them to go to sleep while I remained sometime looking at you. You really looked like a little flower which was blooming even though asleep. I then picked you up and took you back to your dorm . I didn't want to leave you but I had to go. But before going I kissed you on your cheek again and I was really surprised that you whispered Prongs. I left feeling elated that you said my name but when I reached my room I saw my friends were looking at me and smiling broadly. I saw Sirius was holding a diary while Remus was holding my invisibility cloak. Then it clicked in my mind that they had watched me and found out about the diary. I didn't say anything but grinned foolishly at them . They now were sure that Prongs had lost his heart .
All those christmas presents and birthday gifts you sent me are there still with me .When I saw the Hogwarts letter saying that I was to be the Head boy I was not that happy. But that night when you mentioned that you were the Head girl ,I couldn't believe my eyes. I knew that means I could see you every day and may be even when you write the diary . I was looking forward to come back . The year started out well though I was busy with everything ; studies , Quidditch , pranks and meetings . But every day I could see you .
Then came mid term and the masquerade ball . I wanted to ask you but I knew that this time you would want to see who I was. I was almost sure when I asked you would give a positive reply and you did. The ball was really nice and you looked so ravishingly beautiful that I had no time than look at you. During the dance ,when you laid your head on my chest I was so grateful and may be I started hoping that you would like me back no matter who I was . I looked at the time and I knew that after that song the ball would close and everyone was expected to remove their mask . I didn't want to give you a shock in front of everyone so I took you to the gardens. But when I removed my mask and revealed who I was .I saw that you had fainted without even telling me a word .
I took you to the hospital wing and I stayed with you. I blamed myself for all that had happened. I wanted to give you that necklace. But my hopes were crushed when you woke up and said all that and left me .
Lils , without you there is no Prongs .Without you there is no James. I wanted you to be my everything but I know I was wrong . I should have never become your friend then all this wouldn't have happened . It's all my fault." James stopped his narration at this point . He turned his head to hide the emotion he was feeling.
Lily who had been hearing all this knew what he said was true . She no longer felt angry with him . She felt something just the opposite . She somehow had a peculiar feeling that everything was going to be alright . She didn't know what exactly to say. But she knew that the James who she thought was James was not James at all .
She had been blind all along. She had never given a chance to James to prove himself . She has been prejudiced against him just because of that single fault he had comitted as a child in the first year. She felt ashamed that after belonging to a group which was famous for helping and guiding others .She herself had been so wrong. She had judged James so harshly . She wanted to ask his forgiveness . This James was a great person in her eyes much above her ,much .....much above her . He was the person who cared for her all these years. James was Prongs......h..h.....her......her Prongs !!!
She went towards him and put her hand on his shoulder . He turned and looked at her . She couldn't say anything but she looked into his eyes . He saw tears falling slowly from her eyes . He slowly raised his hand and wiped them off. She didn't still say anything but she just held out the necklace to him. He took it wordlessly from her .Then she spoke , " Pr...Pr..J..James , The only thing I c..c..can say now is th...th..that I am not w...worthy of you. I n...need your f...f..forgiveness.. I a..am so so...sorry . I do...don't deserve you .I don't deser....."
James stopped her from saying more by hugging her tightly . She hugged back . Both of them were crying yet they knew that they'll be happy forever. After what seemed seconds to them James pulled back . He then slowly put the necklace on her neck . It shone brillantly . She looked shyly into his eyes and she saw the question there .
She nodded .
That was what he wanted .
He lowered his head while she lifted herself on her toes. They both moved at the same time spontaneously . Soon they were both lip locked . It was a gentle yet passionate . It was their first kiss....a kiss more powerful and more moving than all the magic they had ever done before.... It took them some time to stop and when they did so.
Lily simpy asked ," James, will you love me forever , even after I die ?"
He cupped her face in his arms and said, " As long as the stars shine and heavens last , James would be Lily's forever .for....ever !!!!"
A.N: I am feeling so happy after finishing this fic . I love happy endings. I am really writing this as a sort of a prequel for another fic which concerns H/G . I am a big fan of L/J , H/G and R/Hr.
For those who don't mind H/G you should read that fic .The name of the fic is 'SECRETS DISSOLVED.' I have finished six chapters. But when I was writing the seventh chapter .This idea came into my mind. I couldn't resist but write this. I'll edit this may be after some time as at present my MS word is not working.
Please don't forget to REVIEW and tell me whether you liked this story or not? Everything is welcome !!