Team Rocket Gets Lucky
Disclaimer: All characters belong to the wonderful Nintendo. The dude in the car belongs to his wife, Ethel. Yarn E. and Cronies and Cultivated Banquet and their characters and dialogue belong to themselves and to their orignal versions (Barney and Friends and Fancy Feast) and to the voice in my head. *ring*
Meowth sighed.
"Jesse? James!"
*ring*
Meowth glanced over their three cots. Jesse and James lay fast asleep.
*ring*
"Wake up, you lazy, poor excuses for teammates!"
*ring*
"Wake up, for cryin' out loud!"
*ring*
"Fine! Be that way!"
*ring*
"Hello? Yesh, dis is Team Rocket... Uh huh, dis is Meowth awright... Oh, hi, boss! What's dat, Boss? Oh, no, dare asleep,
Boss... Sure I can give them a message, Boss... What's dat, Boss? Oh. no, Boss, day haven't caught da pikachu...
A pikablu, Boss? Well, okay, Boss, I'll tell them... What? Oh, goodbye, Boss!"
Meowth put down the phone, and glanced back over at the cots... They were asleep alright.... He cleared his throat...
"Oh, sure, Cassidy! Go ahead and take ALL of Jesse's hairspray!"
Jesse woke up with a start. "NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" she screamed. She kicked James.
"Oh... Err... What she said!" agreed Jame, nodding.
"Hey, wait a second!" exclaimed Jesse. "Cassidy isn't here! You stupid cat!" She reached for the frying pan she just
happened to have on her person...
"Hey!" shouted Meowth. "I just woke you up to give you an important message from the boss!"
"Message?" gulped Jessie.
"From the boss?" James asked nervously.
"No!"
"It's not fair!"
"We mean didn't mean anything by it!"
"It was just a practical joke!"
"We're sorry!"
"Now we'll loss our jobs!"
"Charbok will be an orphan!"
"Ash will actually be able to go through a half hour without us showing up!"
"The horror!"
"Calm down, you guys," sighed Meowth, rolling his eyes. "The boss just has a special assignment for us...."
"Oh, err.." the two laughed nervously.
"That was close," whispered Jesse.
"As I was saying," Meowth interupted. "Our mission is to capture a Pikablu..."
"WHAT?!?!?!?" gasped Jesse.
"We..." began James.
"Are... Err... In need of further instruction in the arts of pokemon catching," interupted Jesse, eying the camera.
"What will we do?" wailed James.
"I don't know!" sobbed Jesse.
"Let's brainstorm!" suggested Meowth.
"..eat some snacks!" James exclaimed at the exact same time.
"..go outside and lay in the sun and get a tan!" Jesse exclaimed at the exact same as the other two.
"Okay," sighed Meowth. "We'll go outside and lay in the sun while brainstorming and eating snacks..."
About a half an hour later, Team Rocket, attired in bathing suits, trooped outside carrying a variety of real donuts,
a bowl of riceballs, and some potatoe chips.
Suddenly a Pikablu fell from the sky.
"Hooray!" exclaimed James. "Go us!"
____
A couple days later, Team Rocket was a on a train, enjoying the vacation their boss had given
them as an award for catching a Pikablu.
"Ah!" sighed Jesse and they headed for their section of the bunks. "There's nothing like getting
away from it all!"
Team Rocket opened the door and sat down on their bunks...
"Prepare for trouble!" exclaimed Jesse.
"Make it double!" shouted James.
"To protect the world from devestation,"
"To unite all peoples within our nation,"
"To denounce the evils of truth and love,"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Jesse!"
"James!"
"Team Rocket, blast off at the speed of light!"
"Surrender now or prepare to..."
"Hi, Team Rocket!" exclaimed a voice from behind them. They turned around and found
themselves faced to face with Ash, Misty, and Brock.
"NAAAAAARGHHHHHH!" screamed James and Jesse.
"Hey, over here, " whispered Meowth.
"What is it?" hissed Jesse.
"Yeah, what?" whispered James between sobbs,
"Don't you see?" sighed Meowth. "Dis is da purrfect opportunity to catch da Pikachu!"
"Hmmm..." Jesse and James considered this, and turned around.
"Why, Ash..." exclaimed Jesse.
"..it's great to see you!" finished James.
"And you too, Misty and Brock!"
"And what you cute little kids up to?"
"Probably on their quest to become great pokemon masters.."
"..how exciting!"
"We've come up with a promise..."
"...never to steal Pikachu again!"
"By the way,"
"just out of curiousity,"
"where is Pikachu?"
"I'm glad you've decide to become good!" grinned Ash.
"Yeah," agree Brock.
"But Pikachu thundershocked the conductor," explained Ash.
"We threw him out the window," added Misty.
"NOOOOO!" moaned Team Rocket, jumping the window. "It looks like Team Rocket is blasting off
again!"
______
A couple days later, Team Rocket sat in the woods, hungry, discouraged, and annoyed.
"It's all you two's faults!" shouted Meowth, scratching Jesse and James on the face.
"You've ruined my perfection, again!" wailed Jesse.
As James went to go look for a good hiding place from his two angry teammates, Weezing
suddenly shouted out, "Weezing! [Hey, look, there's a car!]"
James raced over to the car and began banging the the windows. A man rolled down the window.
"Yeah?" he asked.
"Will you please give us ride?"
"Hmm..." pondered the man. "Well, I guess so... If you give us one of your pokemon..."
"Hmm..." James thought this over for a bit. "Well, I guess we could give you Weezing..."
"Weezing! [Hooray!]" exclaimed Weezing.
"Awww...." sighed James. "I'm sorry about this, old pal!"
"Weezing! Weezing! [Don't be sorry! I'd be glad to get away from you losers!]" objected Weezing.
"Oh, I can't do it!" wailed James.
"Weezing! Weezing! [PLEASE! I'll do anything! Let me go with the man!]" screamed Weezing.
"Hello, James! Can't you understand your own pokemon?" sighed Meowth, rolling his eyes. "Weezing
wants to go!"
"Oh... Err... I knew that!" laughed James. "Just a little joke... Heh, heh, heh! Heh... Heh.... Heh..."
"Why am I forced to journey with them?" wailed Meowth, and proceeded to hit his head against the
tree over and over.
Weezing jumped back into his pokeball, which James handed to the man.
Jessse and James hopped in car, grabbing Meowth by the tail.
"Oh," sighed Meowth. "Pretty colors swirling all around..."
____
Team Rocket fell alseep in the car. When the man stopped, he let them out in front of a TV studio in Ivybark. Far from home,
Team Rocket decided to addition for the popular children's show, Yarn E. and Cronies.
"Congratulations!" explained the producer. "You've been chosen to be on Yarn E. and Chronies. You
James will play the part of Timmy, and you Jesse will be playing Susie."
"What about me?" asked Meowth.
"Sorry," the producer sighed. "You weren't chosen. But my buddy has agreed to cast you as
'Fluffy' in the Cultivated Banquet commerical. All you have too do is eat a bowl of Cultivated
Banquet and say the slogan 'Cultivated Banquet: great gust is simple to discern!'"
"Joy," mumbled Meowth, as he led off stage by the producer's friend.
"Meet me on stage with the rest of the cast in 45 minutes!" exclaimed the producer. "Have your lines memorized!"
--
Five minutes later, Jesse and James looked around stage at their fellow cast members. Their
ages ranged from 10 to 20.
"Isn't this show supposed to be for little kids?" asked Jesse.
"Yeah," the producer explained. "But little kids are too expensive to hire... Are you guys ready?"
Everyone nodded.
"Roll 'em!"
"Oh, we love Yarn E.!" sang the cast. "He is really great! Hooray for Yarney! Yippee!"
"Look at this dead lizard I found!" I exclaimed a girl of about 12.
"Maybe if we wish real hard it will come alive!" suggested a man of about 20.
"Yeah!" agreed a 15 year old girl.
"One, two, three... WISH!" shouted the cast. A man in a pink lizard costume came out.
"Yay! It's Yarnee!" exclaimed James.
"Today we're going learn about colors!" the man in the pink lizard costume told them.
"Yay!" cheered the cast muembers.
"This color is blue!" explained the man in the pink lizard costume, pointing to a red apple.
"No it isn't!" objected Jesse.
"Bad Susie!" shouted the man in the pink lizard costume. and slapped Jesse across the face.
The rest of the cast jumped up and burst into song. "Always do what the grown up says, even if
they're long. If you don't, we'll make you sit in the naughty chair for a time that's long! Grownups
are always right, even when they're wrong! You kids should definatly listen to us, 'cause we're singing a song!"
"That's a rap!" shouted the producer. "Good job everyone!"
As the cast members filed out the door, James noticed a rice ball laying on the producer's table.
"Oh! A donut!" he explained, and took a bite.
--
A couple days later, Jesse and Meowth walked down the corridor of the hospital.
"Dare it is!" said Meowth, pointing to a door. "Room 43,278 B!"
They filed in silently, and layed a bundle of roses on the table, along with the other flowers and cards.
"Jesse? Meowth?" moaned James weakly.
"Oh, James!" whispered Jesse. "I'm so glad you're out of surgery!"
"The doctor said that he expects me to recover completly!" beamed James.
"That's wonderful!" beamed Meowth and Jesse.
"Dat was awful mean of da producer to beat you up for stealing his donut," added Meowth.
"Yeah," agreed Jesse. Then she smiled. "Prepare for trouble!"
"Make it double!" laughed James.
"To protect the world from devestation,"
"To unite all peoples within our nation,"
"To denounce the evils of truth and love,"
"To extend our reach to the stars above,"
"Jesse!"
"James!"
"Team Rocket blast off at the speed of light!"
"Surrender now or prepare to fight!"
"Meowth! Dat's right!"
The three partners smiled, and began planning their lawsuit against the producer.