Watching SD&RR.
Author: Invader Johnny.
Summary: Tori isn't amussed by Jade's latest acting job; which of course makes her girlfriend very amused.
Disclaimer: I don't own Victorious, that's property of Dan and Nickelodeon, simple as that, I also don't own "Sex&Drugs&Rock&Roll" that show belongs to FX, not that we didn't already knew that, but I still gotta say it for legal reasons... After all I don't want to get sued.
Author Notes: After watching Liz Gillies acting like such a lovable dork on the second episode of her new series, I couldn't help but write this, it instantly gave me some ammunition as to how to turn it into a Jori fic and have Jade getting even after Tori watched the MV "Bang Bang" so many times in the prequel.
WARNING: If you haven't seen the "SD&RR" episode "Rebel Rebel", then don't read anymore since there are several spoilers ahead, if you don't want to know what happens to Gigi then turn back now.
I really need to think of better names for these crossover fics, no?
Tori narrowed her eyes, glaring at the TV screen as if that would make it magically implode.
"I don't like this"
Jade raised an eyebrow, smirking playfully as she mockingly said "I'm shocked Vega, you said that you loved all my work"
"There's always an exception to the rule!" The Half-Latina replied stubbornly "I don't like you making goo goo eyes with anyone other than me!"
"First of all, Goo goo eyes? Really Vega?" The Goth sneered "No one says that anymore and second of all, you wouldn't happen to be jealous, are you?"
"Of course no!" Tori denied darkly "I just don't want anyone think you're available! WHICH YOUR NOT!"
"Uh huh" Jade said unconvinced "Now if you stop talking, maybe we could watch how it turns out, umm?"
"Fine"
"Uh yeah! What if I'm not her type?!" Gigi asked uncertainty onscreen.
"Honey, you have Elizabeth Taylor's eyes, Kate Hudson's ass, and Salma Hayek's tits." Ava shot back "You're everybody's type."
"Yeah, well, I look like a chipmunk when I smile"
Gigi then made her point by smiling broadly.
Tori gave her girlfriend the evil eye.
"Yes?" Jade asked teasingly "Something wrong?"
"That's how I described you when we first started dating!"
"Oh I know" The former Goth said "I suggested it to the writers and they liked it so much they decided to incorporate it into the episode, think of it as a helpful bit you provided for your very sexy girlfriend"
"And what about the chipmunk thing huh?" Tori snapped "Was that a jab at my cheeks?! You know I how much hate that!"
"Please, Vega" Jade said with a wave of her hand in dismissal "I would never mock your perfect cheeks"
"You do it all the time!"
"All those times I was talking about your ass" The Thespian corrected "You never said I couldn't mock those cheeks"
The Half-Latina let out a very loud aggravated scream.
Jade of course only chuckled in response, she of course ignored her girlfriend's blood pressure going sky high as she grabbed the TiVo remote so they could get back at the exact scene when Tori lost her shit "Now, be quiet Vega, you wouldn't want to miss the rest now would you? After all you made it clear that you love seeing me on the screen, just like you did with my music video, now wasn't that a show?"
"I hate you"
The pale woman laughs "On the contrary, considering how much you watched that video, I think you were pretty mesmerised by me"
"That was then! This is now!" Tori growled "I hate you!"
"Sex with another chick, it is awesome." Ava said "Two girls together, the sex just goes on and on, wave after orgasmic wave.
Mm!" The blond clicks her tongue the. inhales sharply, almost as if she was reminiscing "There's no natural ending."
"Well, then how do you know when it's over?" Gigi questioned, freaking out.
"Eventually somebody gets hungry. Usually me, two hours in, order a pizza, very satisfying"
"Did did you say two hours?"
At that moment Tori slowly gazed at the girl next to her, her jaw down in shock "You did it again!"
"What again?"
"Pizza after sex!" Tori growled "That's our thing!"
"Think of it as giving other lesbians advice Tor" Jade shrugs "Come on you like helping people and pizza after sex? You said so yourself, very satisfying"
"Humph! Well I can tell you this!" The Half-Latina hissed angrily "You won't be getting a happy ending for a while"
"I wouldn't count on it" Jade replied "After all I have plenty of memories with you and two hands, a lot can happen"
"Oh my God, JADE!"
"Oh like you haven't done so yourself, you horndogs"
Tori blushed furiously at that.
"So, shut up, we're missing the show"
"And wouldn't that be a shame"
"Yes it would"
As both women kept watching the show, the more furious The Latina became, she couldn't help but wonder if Jade was actually impersonating her rather than actually portraying Gigi.
Several times Tori saw Jade/Gigi acting nervous around Davvy similarly to how she acted when she was nervous around their first time, it was something that really got under her tanned skin.
"I like a girl who makes bad decisions" Davvy flirted with Jade.
"No, not, Jade, Gigi" Tori had to remind herself it wasn't real, but it sure made her jealous nonetheless because seeing anyone getting all friendly with her Jade was sure to make her blood boil.
"I hate her"
"Who?"
"Davvy" Tori growled.
"Oh really?" Jade asked "It wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that the producers said you weren't right for the part while she aced the role to be my possible lesbian lover, when you who has been my girlfriend since high school just weren't a believable candidate?"
The Half-Latina glared daggers at her pale lover.
"Their words not mine!" Jade yells out, moving her arms in a surrender gesture.
"Don't put salt in the wound, West! Tori hissed hatefully "Besides, the idiot producers clearly were blind, I mean look at her acting! She is too nice for you"
"I could point the irony of the situation here but I don't want to sleep in the couch so I'll just agree with you"
"Smart choice" Tori grunted "This episode sucks"
"Oh I dunno, the writing seems to be ok, but the acting is excellent, I personally liked the advice Ava gave, brings back plenty of memories, eh Vega?"
The pizza in front of them just made Tori ill.
"Where did it cone from?"
"You brought it you dork"
"Will this episode ever end!" Tori whined.
"We're only eight minutes into the show Vega" Jade pointed out "And look at that Gigi can't handle a margarita, what does that tell you?"
"No booze?"
"Hell yeah, no booze, that is something else I made the writer's put into the episode even thought we know most people will ignore it and associate the damn drinks with the joys of rock and roll"
Tori smiled kindly "But there's the chance that someone will get the message"
"Exactly, Vega, exactly" The Thespian agreed "it's just wait and see then"
"Bitch-Tits?!" Tori bellowed out madly "BITCH-TITS! Seriously!"
"What? You love calling me that!" Jade said innocently.
"Only when we're having hot, passionate, angry sex!" The Half-Latina snarled "Why are you doing this to me Jade?!"
"I'm having a blast, getting you all hot and bothered Vega" The actress admitted evilly "After all you did the same thing to me when you watched a certain video over and over, is not fun getting sex-blocked huh?"
"That's what this is about?!" Tori asked at the top of her lungs "Revenge?!"
"Almost" Jade said sneakily "Getting under your skin never gets old Tor, it's fun because it gets you under the perfect type of anger that makes the sex all the more satisfying, tell me, isn't your pussy getting hungry?"
"No... NOO" Tori stuttered unconvincingly "I'm just mad!"
She then saw Gigi kiss Davvy.
"And now I'm super pissed off!"
Jade of course took that moment to kiss her girlfriend passionately.
"No! Jade! You can't just..! Umm... This isn't... Umm... Goddamn it you kiss heavenly"
Several minutes later they parted lips.
"Want to finish this in the bedroom my dear Vega?"
"Do you have to ask?"
At that moment The Half-Latina took her lover by the hand and pulled her towards their bedroom at the exact moment Gigi took Davvy to her room.
"Perfect timing" Jade thought relieved "If Tori had a hissy fit over Gigi kissing another girl, then I can't imagine the reaction she would have if she finds out they really did have sex... I'd be without the Vega kitty indefinitely"
So, how many of you died laughing at the idea of Jade using her experiences of dating Tori for a "SD&RR" episode?
Honestly after seeing Liz/Jade/Gigi acting like such a nervous dork, it sort of made me think that's probably how Tori would have acted, which of course made me think that indeed Jade could be impersonating Tori for the role, much her girlfriend's chagrin.
I also thought that Tori would've gone ballistic over Jade kissing someone other than her even for a few seconds and and a role that millions saw, so if she found out that Gigi indeed had sex with Davvy then Jade would get the blame because Tori would believe that it was her girlfriend's idea and WW3 would happen.
I probably need to point out the obvious fact that Tori hating the episode is a reference to the fact that someone other than her getting to be with Jade is a pet peeve for many loyal Jori fans while Jade herself being so relaxed is a reference to people who have moved on from "Victorious."
Anyway, I might come back and make a second chapter if Gigi/Davvy do end up exploring their time together.
So, what are your final thoughts on this?
Invader Johnny Signing Off.