A/N: Guys! I missed you! I have had mono for the past month, so sorry for the late-ness. I love you all so much and promise that I will try and be here more often.
Inspiration: I have been feeling like an ugly duckling a lot. I just feel that no one will ever want me sometimes. I don't want to question God's reason to create me, but I am just… me I guess. I don't like being me.
Shout Out: A few people! In alphabetical order:
Allyouneedislove1797! If you know Love, (go check her out if you don't) she is alive and well. I have been keeping in touch with her, so she's not dead! :D
A Reviewing Reader: Ary! I miss you and hope to soon review all of your new chapters soon! Love ya sister!
Anonymous Reviewer: Girl! You're awesome! Thank you for the support. Yu should really make an account. I first made my account writing reviews for Love. I am so glad I decided to!
Lyds22: LYYDDSSS! Chickita believe in yourself! I love you (You know what I mean) because you're beautiful and talented. Don't forget it!
Please review! :) If there are errors I apologize. I am really tired and sick!
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Click.
She puckered her lips as her eyes scanned across the page. Her eyes were beginning to sting from starring at the laptop. With her thumb and middle finger, the blond started to pluck her eyebrows involuntarily. It had become a habit this summer, and she had no idea where it came from or why she did it. She licked her lips.
Click.
A sigh escaped from her. It was painful to be looking at all the celebrity's and fashion icons. They all were gorgeous- with their makeup and hair. She picked up her iPhone and used a mirror app to look at her face. It wasn't good enough. She wasn't good enough. It confused her why she wasn't pretty, why she wasn't skinny, and why she couldn't do anything right.
Click.
She looked through her Facebook page, seeing all of her friend's comments. Were they being friendly out of pity? Probably. Who would want to be friends with her anyway? There were tons of other girls out there that were way better.
Click.
Her friends were beautiful. Her sisters were beautiful. Everyone was beautiful besides her. She was just the ugly duckling. It was an overused meme, but she really did feel forever alone. She wasn't liked, she wasn't wanted, and she wasn't needed.
Click.
She entered the fashion website, where you could create your own outfits. Her goal was to create a new one. She dragged the lacey dress over to the template. It was cream with no sleeves, and a thin leather belt wrapping around the waist. A simple pair of stilettos that matched the shade of the belt was added, along with a cat eye that seemed inspired by Adele's makeup. A bag was also added that was trending. She typed in hair in the search box, and found a girl showing off her brunette curls. Dragging it over and fixing the height, she was ready to publish it. A hint of a smile appeared on her face. Her eyes drifted over to the button, but above it was a better collection. Her face crumbled as she was humiliated by her work. Who was she kidding anyway? There was no future in her life.
Click.
Her email was opened, and the inbox button had the number one above it. She smiled as she saw it was from YouTube. Grabbing her earphones, she plugged th cord into her Mac and clicked on the link. It was from her favorite YouTubers, three Asian males. They made short films about different things, but mostly romance. They also had weekend videos, showing what special things they do.
Click.
She hit the replay button, with her eyes welling up. It was a beautiful video, going on her favorites list. She again listened and watched the film.
"You are the last."*
It was s sweet and affectionate. The short credits rolled, and she paused to look at the stunning actress. Pulling up a new window, she typed in the name and saw hundreds of photos. Perfect smile, perfect hair, and perfect looks. Something she would never have.
Click.
She reblogged the angst quote. It had hundreds of comments and was extremely relatable. Sometimes she thought that the people over the Internet understood her more than anyone else in the world. She was aware of the dangers on the computer and such, but honestly didn't mind sharing bits and pieces about her life. It made her feel better, and hoped that it could inspire someone. She then looked at the number of followers, and realized that it had decreased by three. When did that happen, she thought. It caused her to frown and ponder if she had done or said something to make people upset. Well, everything she did in her life made her upset.
Click.
She gapped at the number of calories in her pasta dish that was sitting in front of her. The online chart had given her a whopping 600. She looked down at it. The house mother had put effort into making it and bringing it up to her because she was sick. Starring at it, she realized there were two options. Not eat it, and have society call her too thin, or the opposite and have media call her too fat. Gritting her teeth, she picked up the tray and put it out of sight. She already had an apple and some eggs this morning anyway.
Click.
The music was blasting through her earphones. The Internet radio was one of her favorite websites. It doesn't matter who sang or what the tune was, whatever song was playing she seemed to have a connection with each song. Boy bands came on, until she finally went over to her favorite band, a five member K-Pop group. All of them were incredibly fit and she loved them all. They were famous and well known, at least where they were from. Why couldn't she be famous like them? The stress and pressure must be unimaginable, but to be known would make her constantly overjoyed. But, why would she be famous? She was and always would be just a mistake.
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Disclaimer: I do not own the certain boy band, websites, or YouTuber's mentioned here.
* If you get this and can name the channel, I will love you forever!