I started writing this in September 2013 when I first started uni. I didn't last very long in the rowing club but this story came out of it. I can imagine Kirk having some sort of rivalry with other captains. I own nothing.
Kirk looked serious as he called all the officers into one of the big meeting rooms on the Enterprise. Everyone sat down, wondering what all was the fuss was about when Kirk slammed his fist on the table.
"Officers," he said in his best captain voice, "we've been challenged."
Spock and Bones shared one of their very few moments of solidarity. Bones rolled his eyes.
"Our honour has been put into question." Kirk carried on, clearly on a roll now as he started to walk round the room. "By none other then the U.S.S Intrepid." Everyone knew that Kirk and Captain Jones of the U.S.S Intrepid had a grudge against each other, and one challenged the other to something about once every three months or so. So far the Enterprise was winning 6 - 5 but the Intrepid won the last round, and that had stung. Jim had sulked for at least a week.
"So what is it this time?" Bones asked, folding his arms and leaning back in his chair, "Trivia? Endurance test? Team sport?"
Kirk stopped and smirked at his best friend. "Men's quad rowing. So," he said, rubbing his hands together and pulling out the Kirk disarm smile number three, "who can row? It's officers only now and the cock person has to be a man as well."
Everyone looked at each other sheepishly. Clearly the Captain had no idea what he was talking about and rowing was considered a little old fashioned. It wasn't an offered sport at the academy and it almost looked like everyone knew as much as Kirk until a sigh was heard.
"It's cox, spelt C-O-X. And I know how to row." Carol Marcus piped up.
Kirks smile faded a little bit. "But thats no good. You're a girl."
Carol stood and looked at him. "Yes. But you're going to need a coach." she started, "How long do we have?"
"Three weeks." Kirk said as he sat down, allowing Carol to take over the meeting.
She frowned. "That's not long, but we should be able to manage it. A men's quad is made up of five people. The rowers need not only to be very physically fit but also work in harmony and have good technique. The cox is probably the most important as they keep time, urge the rowers on and steer the boat."
"Can't the rowers steer the boat?" Spock interrupted. "It seems very illogical to have a dead weight when the object is speed."
"The rowers are going backwards, and the cox uses a rudder to steer. We'll need to have at least a couple of go's on the course before the race, so the cox can steer and the rowers can get used to the boat. Where is it?"
"The Thames." Kirk said, "Along the boat race course. You know, where Oxford and Cambridge do it."
"Great, we're going to need a really good cox then. Doesn't matter how strong the rowers are if you can't steer against the current. The cox needs to be as small and light as possible, and able to navigate properly."
All eyes turned to Chekov. The young man was a good three inches shorter then most men and he was almost ridiculously light. Lieutenant Giotto bench pressed him once or twice to show off how light he was.
"Thats settled then. Chekov will be cox." Kirk said, smiling at the navigator.
"I must protest zhis." Chekov said, visibly paler, "I am not what you would call 'sporty'." he even did the air quotes.
"Don't worry Chekov." Carol said, "The cox just has to shout at people and steer. And that's your job."
"But I cannot swim!" The room went quiet.
"How did you get into Starfleet without being able to swim?" Bones said. He distinctly remembered there being a swimming test.
"Zhere is not much water in space." Chekov said. "And I pretended to be sick on zhe swim test."
There was a consensual agreement around the room. Starfleet did over look things sometimes.
"Well you'll be wearing a life jacket and the crew has to look after the cox. Its the rules." Carol said to him before turning to everyone else. "I'll hold trials this evening in gym 3 to see who has the best technique to make the team at 19:00 hours."
"All male officers to attend." Kirk piped up, looking around daring anyone to challenge him. There was a groan but no one said anything.
"Great." Carol said, "Chekov stay with me so we can go through some things. The rest of you I'll see tonight. Expect to be put through your paces!"
Xxx
She wasn't kidding. After an hour on the rowing machines, or ergo's as they were called, the thirty male officers were whittled down to the ten with the best technique. This ten included Bones, much to his annoyance, he was a doctor not a sportsman! He did not have time to spend the next three hours doing circuit training, although he did feel a little smug when men half his age couldn't keep up with him.
In the end everyone was sweating, including Spock, who looked the Vulcan equivalent of totally knackered. Half the crew it seemed had come to watch Carol practically murder the most senior members of the crew through drills. Some laughed at them, and Kirk and Bones shared a look that said those people would be getting extra physicals in the very near future.
Carol called out Kirk, Spock, Sulu, Giotto and Bones as the top five. The first four would be in the team and Bones would be sub, which meant, joy of joys, that he had to still do the training. Carol announced that training would start tomorrow and Chekov, as cox, would be in charge of it. They would go on the water next week when they got home for shore leave and the race would be the week after that. Starfleet were well aware of the rivalry and had given them the time off to do it, saying it was good for moral. They'd even supplies the boats. From where no one knew.
Bones sighed as he walked back to his quarters for a shower. This was going to be a long three weeks.
Xxx
It turned out that Chekov was a complete slave driver, and Kirk made a mental note not to promote him for a while. Although Carol said he was born to be a cox. He worked out the lingo pretty quick and had Scotty built them a boat for them to practice on in the pool. He had figured out which team member was best for each position within a day and always made sure he didn't push them to hurt themselves. He had also learnt how to swim - if badly - as Carol had let slip that the cox of the winning team gets thrown in the water.
Kirk may not like it, but Chekov was getting results, and fast. By the time they docked back home the squad were pretty good, always in time and always did what Chekov said. The kid was seriously scary when he was angry.
They were staying in London until race day and Chekov stayed up most nights looking over tide times and currents around bridges.
The first time on the water properly ended in Chekov crashing the boat. Though not badly, it shook him and he spent even more time on his maps.
By the end of the second week Bones had to drop out after straining his back. No one really minded, he had done well considering he had ten years on most of them.
Chekov got better on the water and soon they were whizzing up and down the Thames like they had been doing it for years, not three weeks.
By the time race day came they were ready and they all stepped out to face the Intrepid team in matching lycra that Carol had got for them. After all Kirk's motto was "If you're going to do something, overdo it."
Jones looked them up and down.
"So Kirk, looks like you've got yourself a motley crew for today. I myself was an Oxford boy. As was Stanford and Smith." he pointed to two powerhouses behind him. "Unfortunately Bates was Cambridge."
Kirk did not like Jones. He did not like his posh boy accent and he did not like his elitist nature.
"Thats cool." Kirk replied, all smiles. "It'll just look worse when we beat you."
Starfleet had sourced an official adjudicator for the event and a few people had shown up to watch, most of them on the four bridges though some had bikes to follow along the river bank. The adjudicator stood next to the scales to weigh the coxes, to make sure they were within the requirements. The cox for the Intrepid was small but chunky, and was easily twice Pavels weight. He frantically took off layers and ran on the spot in a bid to sweat off the extra kilos. Pavel looked at him and grinned. Weight was not the most important thing compared to steering, coaching and motivating but a light cox was always a good thing.
"Parkins." announced the adjudicator and he stepped up.
"63.5 Kilos." he announced. Heavy for a cox. The Intrepid crew looked at each other as their cox got off the scales. He better be good if they wanted to carry that much weight.
Pavel smiled at the Intrepid crew as his name was called and got out a sandwich, eating it on the way up. The other crew stared incredulously. Kirk beamed, kid had learned from the best in psyching out his opponent.
"55.2 kilos." just above the lower limit. Pavel smiled again and stepped down, high fiving Kirk as he went.
They all then went to get in the boats. The Intrepid team got in faultlessly and moved off into the current, then the Enterprise got in. Pavel steered them to warm up a bit first then took them to their starting position.
"Remember what we talked about." he said through his microphone to the rest of the teams earpieces.
"Show no mercy." Giotto said from the back. Pavel gave him a look.
"Not zhat! Don't get too excited and Sulu is stroke, not anyone else." It had been decided that Sulu would be first rower, as he was the smallest and not as strong so he could set the pace.
"Remember to feather your oars as well." Pavel said.
He raised his hand to indicate to the starter that his team was ready at the same time as Parkins, and then the gun went off.
The Intrepid team had a good start and were almost a boat length ahead, Parkins screaming at them and Jones grinning at Pavel who smiled in return. They kept the lead up until the first mile point and the Enterprise crew began to gain on them. At the Hammersmith Bridge Parkins judged the currents wrong and he lost two strokes worth of lead. As they rounded the meander Pavel kept the Enterprise crew on the best path and as they got to the Chiswick Steps they were stroke for stroke.
"I see them!" yelled Uhura where she was sitting with Bones and Scotty on the Steps.
Bones stood up gingerly, "How they doing?" he asked, gazing at the top of the meander where two little boats could be seen.
"I'm not sure, they're too far away. Carol would probably know."
Carol had decided to cycle with the boats and could be seen level with them on the other side of the river.
"It's too close to call." Scotty said. He had bought binoculars and was staring down them.
As the boats got nearer it was clear to see that, whilst the Intrepid boat was just leading, the Enterprise squad were gaining. As they came past the steps they were neck and neck.
"Can you hear Pavel shouting?" Uhura said.
"Wouldn't surprise me." Bones snarked, "Kid can yell."
The Enterprise crew that were sitting on the steps began to get up and cheer for their team. Not wanting to be outdone the Intrepid crew did the same.
Pavel was screaming at them but Jim laughed as he heard the cheers of his crew as they past the steps.
"Shut up Jim! If you can laugh you can go faster!" Pavel yelled. Jim ducked his head and powered on.
By the time they reached the three mile point the Enterprise boat was a stroke ahead, Pavel yelling the entire time. It seemed to work as by Barnes Bridge they were three strokes ahead.
It looked like the Intrepid squad just didn't have the stamina but as the boats reached the home stretch they got a burst of speed on and caught up with the Enterprise boat. The last half mile was any mans game but Pavel just picked a better path for the deceptive Thames current to carry them along on the last stretch, making then win by a stroke.
Jim stood up in the boat after they crossed the line and cheered. Pavel told him to sit down before he capsized them. They rowed up to the pontoon to be greeted by Carol who hugged all of them, even Spock, who looked ridiculously uncomfortable at the contact. The defeated Intrepid team came in soon after and Jim grinned at them.
The adjudicator said that it had been a clean race and there was a photographer there from the Starfleet newspaper and a reporter who did a quick interview with the captains of the two ships about the rivalry.
Afterwards Jim went back to his team who had all gotten coffee and were standing around only to notice that someone was missing.
"Hey where's Pavel?" he asked.
Bones, Uhura and Scotty were walking to the finishing line, wondering who had won when they heard a scream. They ran up to see who was in trouble when they spotted Pavel, shedding clothes and running like his life depended on it, followed by Kirk, Giotto and Sulu. Kirk caught up and rugby tackled the small Russian, now only in his trousers, to the ground. Giotto grabbed his legs as Kirk took his arms and they walked back the way they had come with Pavel struggling all the way.
"Please! Don't! Zhe water is so cold! I cannot swim! You know zhat!" he cried.
"To late now Pavel." Kirk said with a malicious grin on his face. They got up to the pontoon and started to swing the poor boy out over the river. Sulu did a count down and there was an almighty splash as they launched Pavel into the water.
"Fuck!" Pavel yelled as he broke the water. "What is wrong with you!" he accused as he trod water. "I could drown! I could get hyperthermia! I'm never doing anything for you again!" The other three caught up to the team and Jim said, "What d'you think Bones? Hyperthermia?"
Bones clapped his friend on the shoulder. "I guess you won then? Get the poor kid a towel."
They all looked into the water as the very angry little Russian did a bad doggy paddle to the ladder on the pontoon whilst keeping up a stream of curses in his native tongue. He was shivering as he hefted himself out. They all laughed and Carol put a hot pink towel round him.
"I hate all of you." Pavel glared.
"Don't be like that." Kirk said, putting his arm round him. Pavel looked down at his feet, then up into Kirks face as he grinned maliciously. He shoved him bodily off the pontoon.
"Jesus fucking Christ! Its freezing!" Jim yelled.
Sulu laughed but he was in the water soon enough. Giotto looked wearily at Pavel but Bones pushed him in instead. Uhura looked flabbergasted at him but he shrugged.
"He's always bitching about physicals." he said.
Spock ended up being the only member of the squad who stayed dry. Until Bones got him as well.