Author's Note: This plot bunny came to me when I was wondering what exactly the
reaction of the wizarding world was when they discovered automobiles. Clearly,
they must have gotten used to them in order to have the Knight Bus and to
bewitch cars for their own use. So, I decided to put Albus Dumbledore and
Alastor Moody in the uncomfortable position of test driving a brand new
invention. This takes place somewhere around the same time the first cars came
to be on the road, so they're much younger than they are in canon but I did
decide to listen to some of my readers and made Moody younger than Dumbledore.
A Beautiful Day for a Drive It was a shame, Albus Dumbledore thought as he looked out the window, to
spend such a lovely day inside, researching on a project that could be finished
just as easily tomorrow. Really, such lovely days happened so rarely in England
and this was the first particularly pleasant, warm, clear, sunny day they'd had
since winter started. He'd even venture to say they hadn't had one since summer
and his body was aching to feel the sun on his back, the wind in his hair and
his mind yearned for some distraction. He heard a soft popping sound behind him
and smiled. His distraction had arrived.
"You owled, Dumbledore?" Alastor Moody asked him.
"Yes, I did," Albus replied, turning to face his visitor, "and you arrived
just in the nick of time." He reached over and took his hat off the coat hook
and opened the front door, gesturing for Moody to go out ahead of him but the
auror did not move. Instead, he eyed him suspiciously, his blue eyes piercing
Dumbledore's as though he were trying to guess at his motive. "What is this all
about, Albus? You aren't expecting me to help you gather more dragon's blood are
you? After what happened last time, I'd hope you'd know I won't be doing that
again."
"Oh, don't be ridiculous," Dumbledore chided, "Mungo's healed you up in no
time. The only lasting aftereffects you have are those scars."
Moody rubbed the rough, brown areas on his face and gave Dumbledore the
most sinister look he could muster. "For the fiftieth time, I am an Auror,
Albus, not an alchemist, not a dragon tamer and I am most certainly not your
research assistant anymore." He straightened his back and Dumbledore recognized
the telltale signs of a man preparing to apparate.
"Now, now, Alastor," Dumbledore said soothingly, "I have no intention in
making you conduct research for me or with me. I just want you to come with me."
"I can't. When I received your owl I was in the middle of working on a
very important case-"
"A dark wizard this time or just another muggle-baiter?"
"Oh, you can never tell," Moody said dismissively. "The times have been
quiet enough, they just have us chase them all down instead of bothering with
the details. But the point is that I had almost found the man," Moody groused.
"Don't worry, I'm sure he won't go anywhere while you're gone."
"Hmpf. In weather like this? Of course he'll go somewhere."
"Then maybe we'll run into him while we're out."
"I doubt that. Besides," Moody added quickly, I can't go anywhere. I've
forgotten my hat."
"You can borrow one of mine," Dumbledore offered, throwing him a green
bowler hat and ushering him out the door, which he slammed shut behind them with
a sigh of satisfaction. They were outside, in the beautiful world. Moody
followed him, the hat still in his hand.
"What kind of hat is this? Look, Albus-"
"Oh, just put it on! I assure you green suits you well," Dumbledore told
him.
Moody glared "I wasn't referring to the way it looked on my Albus," but he
pulled it down on his head nonetheless and ran his hand over the rim as he
strode next to Dumbledore. "Odd type of hat. Is it muggle?"
"Yes, I just bought it a few days ago," Dumbledore replied and glanced at
his friend out of the corner of his eye. "I must admit it does look remarkably
good on you."
"Does it? Well, I've never been much of a fan of muggle things but-" Moody
broke off, having realized Dumbledore had successfully distracted him from his
original topic. Not for long, though. "Why did you owl me? Your message didn't
say much and you still haven't answered my question," he continued doggedly.
Dumbledore took a deep breath before answering. Moody could be very
fanatical about his work; it was one of his most endearing qualities and he
probably would not take Dumbledore's explanation well. Oh well, out with it. "I
fancied a stroll through the countryside on this beautiful day," he answered
swiftly, hoping to fend off protests before they arose. "And, as it is a
commonly known fact that the best strolls are the ones one takes with a
companion I thought-"
He didn't get a chance to finish. "You mean to tell me you sent me an owl
requesting my immediate presence just because you wanted to go on a walk?"
Clearly his efforts at legilimens were paying off, Albus mused. As he had
expected, Alastor was less than thrilled with this explanation. He nodded and
Moody very nearly exploded. "Albus, I was this close to cracking my case!" He
held his fingers out about half an inch apart.
"And, my dear friend, you will still be that far apart by the end of the
day," Dumbledore assured him. "Your case will not regress while you are
refreshing your mind and sharpening your eyes to recognize details they may have
missed before."
Alastor gave him a skeptical look then turned away, following Dumbledore
begrudgingly down the path. Dumbledore smiled; Moody would never admit it but he
was probably grateful for the interruption. They continued in silence for a
moment, which Alastor abruptly broke by asking harshly, "Were you able to make
it to that concert in London last week you were so keen about?"
"No, unfortunately not," Dumbledore answered with a sigh. "Everard invited
me to dinner. He wanted to try to convince me to accept a position at Hogwarts
again."
Moody chuckled. "He still hasn't given up, has he?"
"No, he has not."
"What did he offer you this time?"
"He is very eager to get me onto the staff, so he offered pretty much
anything I wanted. Any position, any pay."
"Indeed?"
"Well, he forgot to mention certain limitations. When I suggested
groundskeeper, he looked a little flustered and told me he already had an
adequate man for that position."
"How unchivalrous of you, Albus, to give the poor man nightmares! Having
the great Albus Dumbledore, who helped discover the Philosopher's Stone as his
groundskeeper!" Moody was loosening up now and the two of them laughed; Moody's
harsh and scratchy.
"Ah," Dumbledore said, wiping his eyes, "on days like this I would not
mind having such a position. The fresh air would do me good."
"Yes, because you spend so much time cooped up inside, working on some
inane project," Moody deadpanned.
"I do."
"I know."
"I'm not lying."
"Of course not." Albus refused to respond this time. The two of them had
been through this same conversation countless times since Moody had left his
position as Dumbledore's assistant. Moody had taken the route of the overly
dedicated auror whereas Dumbledore continued on his path to becoming a highly
successful, if not slightly eccentric, independent researcher. This left him
with ample time to pursue his favorite leisure activities, such as nine-pin
bowling, while trying to get his creative juices flowing. Moody preferred to
call it "procrastination" and "living obscenely off of his benefactors funds
until they ran out and he needed something to secure more funds." They both knew
he was joking. At least, Dumbledore sincerely hoped he was.
"Merlin's beard! Will you look at that!" Moody exclaimed, thrusting
Dumbledore out of his thoughts and back onto the garden path, which had turned
into a road as they headed towards the nearby village. "What is that
contraption?" Moody was pointing at a black box-shaped object on four wheels
sitting on the side of the road. It looked like a carriage but there was a
conspicuous lack of horses and Dumbledore was just as puzzled as his friend
until the image clicked with something he'd learned from Everard on his trip to
London.
"Yes, I remember hearing about these," he said as they came near it.
"They're called automobiles, or horseless carriages. Some sort of recent muggle
invention to make their way of travel more efficient than their beasts of
burden." He peered at it closely. "I've been wanting to get a closer look at one
of these."
"And now you've got your chance." Moody studied the automobile with a
skeptical look on his face. "Looks rather inefficient, doesn't it?"
Dumbledore examined it carefully. "I wonder how it runs." The seats
offered no clue, nor did the bane of glass in front of it. He bent down to look
beneath it.
"Not floo powder, that's for sure. Perhaps a potion of some sort?" Moody
suggested and opened a side door.
"They're muggles, Alastor," Dumbledore reminded him but he wasn't sure
Moody heard as his voice was rather muffled with his head under the auto. All he
could see under there were pipes leading this way and that. There seemed to be a
few empty spaces above him and he reached his hand up one of them, groping
around to see if it would reveal anything. He felt something, took his wand out
and lit it but before he could use it to illuminate anything, a loud voice
called out, "Hello there! May I help you gentlemen?" Dumbledore quickly
extinguished his wand, crawled out from underneath the car and looked up to see
a muggle man, dressed up smartly in a suit with a thin veneer of politeness
across his face.
"Yes," Dumbledore answered, hoping that if he talked enough the man would
not notice their odd clothing. "We find your automobile very intriguing. You
see, out here in the country one does not usually see many automobiles. Do you
think you could show us how it works?"
The man relaxed, introduced himself as Mr. Harrington and Dumbledore could
see the wheels of his mind turning over the thought that these were just a
couple of odd country bumpkins in equally odd clothing messing around with
technology that, were it not for him, they would have never have had the
opportunity to explore. "Of course!" Mr. Harrington replied silkily. "It's not
too challenging though I assure you, it does move quite a bit faster than the
horses and mules you're probably used to." Albus smiled at Moody when he heard
this and Moody grunted back irritably in reply.
"Yes, I'm quite sure of that," Albus responded. "Things do seem to be
getting faster these days."
"Well, I can tell you Mr. -er,"
"Jones," Albus supplied.
"Jones, that this machine will get you anywhere at speeds upwards of 30
miles an hour."
Albus stroked his chin thoughtfully and said, "Really? My, how things do
advance." Moody broke into a fit of coughing at this and the man looked at him
in concern. "Oh, pay him no mind. My cousin has just been feeling a bit under
the weather lately."
"Oh, yes, I see," Mr. Harrington looked at Moody uncomfortably again then
approached the car. "If I may--?" Moody got up, moved to the back and crossed
his arms in front of him like a spoiled child. Mr. Harrington sat down behind
the wheel with Albus in the passenger seat next to him. He and Moody peered
curiously at the owner. He smiled and pulled a key out from his pocket. "Now,
gentlemen, if you will observe, it is really quite simple. You merely insert the
key, press in on the clutch, turn the key and viola-," a grating sound came from
the engine thatcaused Moody to start and raise his wand quickly. Dumbledore
motioned him down and he eased back into his seat, still eyeing the
surroundings, mistrustfully. The muggle, however, smiled reassuringly. "Oh, it's
all right. Nothing to be nervous about; this is all perfectly normal. I can't
count the number of horses I've scared starting up this contraption around
them."
"Oh, don't mind him. He's always been a jumpy sort. Now, how does this
automobile go?" Dumbledore peered over at the driver's consol curiously and
successfully redirecting Mr. Harrington's attention towards it.
"Ah, yes. Well, it's really quite simple. You press in the clutch, shift it into
gear," he moved a stick with a harsh sound, "press the gas and you go!" The car
lurched forward and so did Dumbledore and Moody. They drove along in silence for
a few minutes with no sound other than the engine and nature surrounding them.
After noting Alastor's attempts to gain his attention, Albus glanced over at
their driver, who was watching the road with a self-satisfied look on his face.
"I don't suppose you would be opposed to letting us try driving it, now would
you?" He suggested.
"Er, what?" Mr. Harrington took his eyes off the road to give Dumbledore an
incredulous look.
"I asked if you would be terribly opposed letting us drive your
automobile."
Mr. Harrington's face fell. "Well, I don't know-you see, these are quite
a bit trickier to handle than your average horse-and-cart."
A whispered spell from the back seat reached Dumbledore's ear and looked
to catch Moody hastily putting his wand back into his robes. "I think you will
find us more than up to the challenge," Moody responded.
"Well," Mr. Harrington seemed to waver and he glanced at Dumbledore and
searched his eyes for reassurance. "All right. I'll let you have a go at it." He
stopped on the side of the road and turned off the car."
"Wonderful," Moody said and without missing a beat, scrambled up into
the front seat, displacing their host onto the side of the road, which was
clearly not what he had in mind. With the motions of an old hand, he deftly
started the engine, shifted it into gear, put on the gas and drove off.
"Hey!" Mr. Harrington yelled. "I didn't say you could drive it
without me!"
Dumbledore peered over at Mr. Harrington, who was now running beside
the car, one hand on his hat. "Really, Alastor, a suggestive charm? I thought
most aurors would find that unethical."
Moody shrugged. "I thought it would save you time trying to
convince him and the sooner you get to drive this thing, the sooner this walk is
over and the sooner I get back to my case. Besides, it seems to have worn off
already." Mr. Harrington was neck and neck with the car, trying to jump onto it
with one hand while his other remained firmly on top of his hat.
"This is--- theft--- you---know!" He yelled between huffs and
attempted to leap into the vehicle.
"If you are planning on outrunning him, Alastor," Dumbledore
suggested gently, "You might want to consider going faster than 10 miles an
hour."
"What? Oh---yes, that might help." He looked down at the shifting
gear, then up at the speedometer, then down at the pedals. He frowned, wrinkled
his brows, attempted moving one or the other to speed up, found none of them
produced anything save a terrible rumbling sound from the engine and whipped out
his wand. "Merlin, all these contraptions and not a single one of them with the
efficiency of a simple speed charm." He caste the spell and the car gave a lurch
and immediately began to accelerate, pinning the two of them against their seats
and two of their hands upon their hats. Moody grimaced at Dumbledore and yelled,
"This, Albus, is why the muggles will never advance farther than wizards. How
many years have we been charming broomsticks with that spell and they just now
develop a way to go anywhere at 30 miles an hour?"
Dumbledore nodded absently. "I'm glad you approve," he answered. "Now
let me drive."
Moody glanced over at him. "What? I just started to get the hang of
it."
"If you'll recall it was I who suggested to our dear friend Mr.
Harrington that he lend us his car." They both turned and glanced backwards down
the road where no Mr. Harrington was in sight. Laughing, they turned back to the
front.
Moody continued, "and if you'll recall it was I who turned that into a
real suggestion."
"Come now, you said so yourself that the sooner you let me drive, the
sooner you could get back to your case."
Moody frowned, clearly considering the implications of this. "Alright.
But five minutes. That's it." Dumbledore nodded and got up.
Switching seats is complicated in most vehicles and even more
complicated when the vehicle is one of the first ones to developed and the two
attempting the switch are wearing ankle-length robes and speeding down the road
at 50 miles an hour. "Watch out, you've stepped on my robe."
"Sorry-ow! That was my foot!"
"My hair, you've got my hair in your glasses."
"Watch the road! Here, just put your hand on the steering wheel, I'll
move into your seat and then you sit down in mine!" Moody shifted over quickly
and Dumbledore found himself half-standing in the now vacant driver's seat.
"That wasn't too difficult," he said as straightened his glasses and
sat down. "Now, what does this pedal do?" He pressed it and nothing happened.
"It's under a speed charm, Dumbledore, none of the pedals do much
of anything at the moment."
"Hmmmm." A quick swish of the wand and the car relaxed and slowed
down to a much more timely 10 miles an hour. Moody contorted his face in
displeasure. "If I am to drive this car, it will be I that does the driving-not
some spell," Dumbledore explained patiently. He peered down his long nose at the
floor pedals. "Now, let's see-I believe he pressed in this one and then-" He
shifted the gear changer over and the engine rumbling decreased noticeably. "Ah
ha! I believe I have just switched gears."
"From eccentric to lunatic?" Moody asked. Dumbledore ignored him.
"Yes, look, we are now going 20 miles an hour! Let's see if I can't-
-" He did and the car began to pick up more speed and Dumbledore beamed with
satisfaction. "You know, I might just have to get one of these. Not only are
they pure joy to drive but, as you yourself have already demonstrated, they are
just as easy to magically manipulate as trains, carpets and other muggle
objects."
"Great. Now we have start watching out for biting automobiles in
addition to teacups. Are you watching the road?" Moody grabbed the steering
wheel and turned it abruptly.
"Let go!" Dumbledore swatted away Moody's hands. "I am watching the
road. It is perfectly okay for me to take my eyes off of it for a few seconds,
so stop meddling."
"Meddling? I've never seen worse driving in my life! Look how close
you are to that hedge!"
"Fifteen minutes ago you'd never seen any driving in your life,
therefore, your judgments on this matter carry very little weight," Dumbledore
retorted as he guided the automobile closer to the middle of the road. The road
was narrower than he thought and a scraping sound filled the car.
"Move over that way!" Moody scolded, reaching again for the steering
wheel.
"Mind your own business!"
"Oh sod it, Dumbledore, let me have the wheel!" Moody said through
gritted teeth.
"For someone who didn't even want to go on a walk in the first place
you certainly are putting up a fight now!" Dumbledore retorted.
"I, for one, care about the condition in which we return this
automobile to its owner."
"Oh, and I don't?" Just as they were really beginning to get into it,
a crunching sound filled the car and they looked up just in time to get a face-
full of branches.
"You weren't watching the road!" Moody yelled, letting go of the
steering wheel to protect his face as the hedge's branches scrapped painfully
over their faces. They careened through the hedgerow as Dumbledore struggled to
find a way to get the car back on the road. Pulling sticks out of his hair, he
shouted at Moody, "How could I have been watching the road while I was watching
you, trying to make sure you didn't take over command?"
"Merlin's beard, we're not on a ship," Moody shouted back, "There
is no chain of command!"
Dumbledore opened his mouth to reply, glanced at the road and forgot
all intent. "Tree!"
"What?" Moody turned to look in front of the car and frantically began motioning
at Dumbledore. "Break! Break! Press the break!"
"Which one is the break?" Dumbledore pressed on a couple but with the
car only went faster.
"No, not that one," the driving expert shouted, "The other one!"
"Which one?"
"The other one!"
CRASH!
reaction of the wizarding world was when they discovered automobiles. Clearly,
they must have gotten used to them in order to have the Knight Bus and to
bewitch cars for their own use. So, I decided to put Albus Dumbledore and
Alastor Moody in the uncomfortable position of test driving a brand new
invention. This takes place somewhere around the same time the first cars came
to be on the road, so they're much younger than they are in canon but I did
decide to listen to some of my readers and made Moody younger than Dumbledore.
A Beautiful Day for a Drive It was a shame, Albus Dumbledore thought as he looked out the window, to
spend such a lovely day inside, researching on a project that could be finished
just as easily tomorrow. Really, such lovely days happened so rarely in England
and this was the first particularly pleasant, warm, clear, sunny day they'd had
since winter started. He'd even venture to say they hadn't had one since summer
and his body was aching to feel the sun on his back, the wind in his hair and
his mind yearned for some distraction. He heard a soft popping sound behind him
and smiled. His distraction had arrived.
"You owled, Dumbledore?" Alastor Moody asked him.
"Yes, I did," Albus replied, turning to face his visitor, "and you arrived
just in the nick of time." He reached over and took his hat off the coat hook
and opened the front door, gesturing for Moody to go out ahead of him but the
auror did not move. Instead, he eyed him suspiciously, his blue eyes piercing
Dumbledore's as though he were trying to guess at his motive. "What is this all
about, Albus? You aren't expecting me to help you gather more dragon's blood are
you? After what happened last time, I'd hope you'd know I won't be doing that
again."
"Oh, don't be ridiculous," Dumbledore chided, "Mungo's healed you up in no
time. The only lasting aftereffects you have are those scars."
Moody rubbed the rough, brown areas on his face and gave Dumbledore the
most sinister look he could muster. "For the fiftieth time, I am an Auror,
Albus, not an alchemist, not a dragon tamer and I am most certainly not your
research assistant anymore." He straightened his back and Dumbledore recognized
the telltale signs of a man preparing to apparate.
"Now, now, Alastor," Dumbledore said soothingly, "I have no intention in
making you conduct research for me or with me. I just want you to come with me."
"I can't. When I received your owl I was in the middle of working on a
very important case-"
"A dark wizard this time or just another muggle-baiter?"
"Oh, you can never tell," Moody said dismissively. "The times have been
quiet enough, they just have us chase them all down instead of bothering with
the details. But the point is that I had almost found the man," Moody groused.
"Don't worry, I'm sure he won't go anywhere while you're gone."
"Hmpf. In weather like this? Of course he'll go somewhere."
"Then maybe we'll run into him while we're out."
"I doubt that. Besides," Moody added quickly, I can't go anywhere. I've
forgotten my hat."
"You can borrow one of mine," Dumbledore offered, throwing him a green
bowler hat and ushering him out the door, which he slammed shut behind them with
a sigh of satisfaction. They were outside, in the beautiful world. Moody
followed him, the hat still in his hand.
"What kind of hat is this? Look, Albus-"
"Oh, just put it on! I assure you green suits you well," Dumbledore told
him.
Moody glared "I wasn't referring to the way it looked on my Albus," but he
pulled it down on his head nonetheless and ran his hand over the rim as he
strode next to Dumbledore. "Odd type of hat. Is it muggle?"
"Yes, I just bought it a few days ago," Dumbledore replied and glanced at
his friend out of the corner of his eye. "I must admit it does look remarkably
good on you."
"Does it? Well, I've never been much of a fan of muggle things but-" Moody
broke off, having realized Dumbledore had successfully distracted him from his
original topic. Not for long, though. "Why did you owl me? Your message didn't
say much and you still haven't answered my question," he continued doggedly.
Dumbledore took a deep breath before answering. Moody could be very
fanatical about his work; it was one of his most endearing qualities and he
probably would not take Dumbledore's explanation well. Oh well, out with it. "I
fancied a stroll through the countryside on this beautiful day," he answered
swiftly, hoping to fend off protests before they arose. "And, as it is a
commonly known fact that the best strolls are the ones one takes with a
companion I thought-"
He didn't get a chance to finish. "You mean to tell me you sent me an owl
requesting my immediate presence just because you wanted to go on a walk?"
Clearly his efforts at legilimens were paying off, Albus mused. As he had
expected, Alastor was less than thrilled with this explanation. He nodded and
Moody very nearly exploded. "Albus, I was this close to cracking my case!" He
held his fingers out about half an inch apart.
"And, my dear friend, you will still be that far apart by the end of the
day," Dumbledore assured him. "Your case will not regress while you are
refreshing your mind and sharpening your eyes to recognize details they may have
missed before."
Alastor gave him a skeptical look then turned away, following Dumbledore
begrudgingly down the path. Dumbledore smiled; Moody would never admit it but he
was probably grateful for the interruption. They continued in silence for a
moment, which Alastor abruptly broke by asking harshly, "Were you able to make
it to that concert in London last week you were so keen about?"
"No, unfortunately not," Dumbledore answered with a sigh. "Everard invited
me to dinner. He wanted to try to convince me to accept a position at Hogwarts
again."
Moody chuckled. "He still hasn't given up, has he?"
"No, he has not."
"What did he offer you this time?"
"He is very eager to get me onto the staff, so he offered pretty much
anything I wanted. Any position, any pay."
"Indeed?"
"Well, he forgot to mention certain limitations. When I suggested
groundskeeper, he looked a little flustered and told me he already had an
adequate man for that position."
"How unchivalrous of you, Albus, to give the poor man nightmares! Having
the great Albus Dumbledore, who helped discover the Philosopher's Stone as his
groundskeeper!" Moody was loosening up now and the two of them laughed; Moody's
harsh and scratchy.
"Ah," Dumbledore said, wiping his eyes, "on days like this I would not
mind having such a position. The fresh air would do me good."
"Yes, because you spend so much time cooped up inside, working on some
inane project," Moody deadpanned.
"I do."
"I know."
"I'm not lying."
"Of course not." Albus refused to respond this time. The two of them had
been through this same conversation countless times since Moody had left his
position as Dumbledore's assistant. Moody had taken the route of the overly
dedicated auror whereas Dumbledore continued on his path to becoming a highly
successful, if not slightly eccentric, independent researcher. This left him
with ample time to pursue his favorite leisure activities, such as nine-pin
bowling, while trying to get his creative juices flowing. Moody preferred to
call it "procrastination" and "living obscenely off of his benefactors funds
until they ran out and he needed something to secure more funds." They both knew
he was joking. At least, Dumbledore sincerely hoped he was.
"Merlin's beard! Will you look at that!" Moody exclaimed, thrusting
Dumbledore out of his thoughts and back onto the garden path, which had turned
into a road as they headed towards the nearby village. "What is that
contraption?" Moody was pointing at a black box-shaped object on four wheels
sitting on the side of the road. It looked like a carriage but there was a
conspicuous lack of horses and Dumbledore was just as puzzled as his friend
until the image clicked with something he'd learned from Everard on his trip to
London.
"Yes, I remember hearing about these," he said as they came near it.
"They're called automobiles, or horseless carriages. Some sort of recent muggle
invention to make their way of travel more efficient than their beasts of
burden." He peered at it closely. "I've been wanting to get a closer look at one
of these."
"And now you've got your chance." Moody studied the automobile with a
skeptical look on his face. "Looks rather inefficient, doesn't it?"
Dumbledore examined it carefully. "I wonder how it runs." The seats
offered no clue, nor did the bane of glass in front of it. He bent down to look
beneath it.
"Not floo powder, that's for sure. Perhaps a potion of some sort?" Moody
suggested and opened a side door.
"They're muggles, Alastor," Dumbledore reminded him but he wasn't sure
Moody heard as his voice was rather muffled with his head under the auto. All he
could see under there were pipes leading this way and that. There seemed to be a
few empty spaces above him and he reached his hand up one of them, groping
around to see if it would reveal anything. He felt something, took his wand out
and lit it but before he could use it to illuminate anything, a loud voice
called out, "Hello there! May I help you gentlemen?" Dumbledore quickly
extinguished his wand, crawled out from underneath the car and looked up to see
a muggle man, dressed up smartly in a suit with a thin veneer of politeness
across his face.
"Yes," Dumbledore answered, hoping that if he talked enough the man would
not notice their odd clothing. "We find your automobile very intriguing. You
see, out here in the country one does not usually see many automobiles. Do you
think you could show us how it works?"
The man relaxed, introduced himself as Mr. Harrington and Dumbledore could
see the wheels of his mind turning over the thought that these were just a
couple of odd country bumpkins in equally odd clothing messing around with
technology that, were it not for him, they would have never have had the
opportunity to explore. "Of course!" Mr. Harrington replied silkily. "It's not
too challenging though I assure you, it does move quite a bit faster than the
horses and mules you're probably used to." Albus smiled at Moody when he heard
this and Moody grunted back irritably in reply.
"Yes, I'm quite sure of that," Albus responded. "Things do seem to be
getting faster these days."
"Well, I can tell you Mr. -er,"
"Jones," Albus supplied.
"Jones, that this machine will get you anywhere at speeds upwards of 30
miles an hour."
Albus stroked his chin thoughtfully and said, "Really? My, how things do
advance." Moody broke into a fit of coughing at this and the man looked at him
in concern. "Oh, pay him no mind. My cousin has just been feeling a bit under
the weather lately."
"Oh, yes, I see," Mr. Harrington looked at Moody uncomfortably again then
approached the car. "If I may--?" Moody got up, moved to the back and crossed
his arms in front of him like a spoiled child. Mr. Harrington sat down behind
the wheel with Albus in the passenger seat next to him. He and Moody peered
curiously at the owner. He smiled and pulled a key out from his pocket. "Now,
gentlemen, if you will observe, it is really quite simple. You merely insert the
key, press in on the clutch, turn the key and viola-," a grating sound came from
the engine thatcaused Moody to start and raise his wand quickly. Dumbledore
motioned him down and he eased back into his seat, still eyeing the
surroundings, mistrustfully. The muggle, however, smiled reassuringly. "Oh, it's
all right. Nothing to be nervous about; this is all perfectly normal. I can't
count the number of horses I've scared starting up this contraption around
them."
"Oh, don't mind him. He's always been a jumpy sort. Now, how does this
automobile go?" Dumbledore peered over at the driver's consol curiously and
successfully redirecting Mr. Harrington's attention towards it.
"Ah, yes. Well, it's really quite simple. You press in the clutch, shift it into
gear," he moved a stick with a harsh sound, "press the gas and you go!" The car
lurched forward and so did Dumbledore and Moody. They drove along in silence for
a few minutes with no sound other than the engine and nature surrounding them.
After noting Alastor's attempts to gain his attention, Albus glanced over at
their driver, who was watching the road with a self-satisfied look on his face.
"I don't suppose you would be opposed to letting us try driving it, now would
you?" He suggested.
"Er, what?" Mr. Harrington took his eyes off the road to give Dumbledore an
incredulous look.
"I asked if you would be terribly opposed letting us drive your
automobile."
Mr. Harrington's face fell. "Well, I don't know-you see, these are quite
a bit trickier to handle than your average horse-and-cart."
A whispered spell from the back seat reached Dumbledore's ear and looked
to catch Moody hastily putting his wand back into his robes. "I think you will
find us more than up to the challenge," Moody responded.
"Well," Mr. Harrington seemed to waver and he glanced at Dumbledore and
searched his eyes for reassurance. "All right. I'll let you have a go at it." He
stopped on the side of the road and turned off the car."
"Wonderful," Moody said and without missing a beat, scrambled up into
the front seat, displacing their host onto the side of the road, which was
clearly not what he had in mind. With the motions of an old hand, he deftly
started the engine, shifted it into gear, put on the gas and drove off.
"Hey!" Mr. Harrington yelled. "I didn't say you could drive it
without me!"
Dumbledore peered over at Mr. Harrington, who was now running beside
the car, one hand on his hat. "Really, Alastor, a suggestive charm? I thought
most aurors would find that unethical."
Moody shrugged. "I thought it would save you time trying to
convince him and the sooner you get to drive this thing, the sooner this walk is
over and the sooner I get back to my case. Besides, it seems to have worn off
already." Mr. Harrington was neck and neck with the car, trying to jump onto it
with one hand while his other remained firmly on top of his hat.
"This is--- theft--- you---know!" He yelled between huffs and
attempted to leap into the vehicle.
"If you are planning on outrunning him, Alastor," Dumbledore
suggested gently, "You might want to consider going faster than 10 miles an
hour."
"What? Oh---yes, that might help." He looked down at the shifting
gear, then up at the speedometer, then down at the pedals. He frowned, wrinkled
his brows, attempted moving one or the other to speed up, found none of them
produced anything save a terrible rumbling sound from the engine and whipped out
his wand. "Merlin, all these contraptions and not a single one of them with the
efficiency of a simple speed charm." He caste the spell and the car gave a lurch
and immediately began to accelerate, pinning the two of them against their seats
and two of their hands upon their hats. Moody grimaced at Dumbledore and yelled,
"This, Albus, is why the muggles will never advance farther than wizards. How
many years have we been charming broomsticks with that spell and they just now
develop a way to go anywhere at 30 miles an hour?"
Dumbledore nodded absently. "I'm glad you approve," he answered. "Now
let me drive."
Moody glanced over at him. "What? I just started to get the hang of
it."
"If you'll recall it was I who suggested to our dear friend Mr.
Harrington that he lend us his car." They both turned and glanced backwards down
the road where no Mr. Harrington was in sight. Laughing, they turned back to the
front.
Moody continued, "and if you'll recall it was I who turned that into a
real suggestion."
"Come now, you said so yourself that the sooner you let me drive, the
sooner you could get back to your case."
Moody frowned, clearly considering the implications of this. "Alright.
But five minutes. That's it." Dumbledore nodded and got up.
Switching seats is complicated in most vehicles and even more
complicated when the vehicle is one of the first ones to developed and the two
attempting the switch are wearing ankle-length robes and speeding down the road
at 50 miles an hour. "Watch out, you've stepped on my robe."
"Sorry-ow! That was my foot!"
"My hair, you've got my hair in your glasses."
"Watch the road! Here, just put your hand on the steering wheel, I'll
move into your seat and then you sit down in mine!" Moody shifted over quickly
and Dumbledore found himself half-standing in the now vacant driver's seat.
"That wasn't too difficult," he said as straightened his glasses and
sat down. "Now, what does this pedal do?" He pressed it and nothing happened.
"It's under a speed charm, Dumbledore, none of the pedals do much
of anything at the moment."
"Hmmmm." A quick swish of the wand and the car relaxed and slowed
down to a much more timely 10 miles an hour. Moody contorted his face in
displeasure. "If I am to drive this car, it will be I that does the driving-not
some spell," Dumbledore explained patiently. He peered down his long nose at the
floor pedals. "Now, let's see-I believe he pressed in this one and then-" He
shifted the gear changer over and the engine rumbling decreased noticeably. "Ah
ha! I believe I have just switched gears."
"From eccentric to lunatic?" Moody asked. Dumbledore ignored him.
"Yes, look, we are now going 20 miles an hour! Let's see if I can't-
-" He did and the car began to pick up more speed and Dumbledore beamed with
satisfaction. "You know, I might just have to get one of these. Not only are
they pure joy to drive but, as you yourself have already demonstrated, they are
just as easy to magically manipulate as trains, carpets and other muggle
objects."
"Great. Now we have start watching out for biting automobiles in
addition to teacups. Are you watching the road?" Moody grabbed the steering
wheel and turned it abruptly.
"Let go!" Dumbledore swatted away Moody's hands. "I am watching the
road. It is perfectly okay for me to take my eyes off of it for a few seconds,
so stop meddling."
"Meddling? I've never seen worse driving in my life! Look how close
you are to that hedge!"
"Fifteen minutes ago you'd never seen any driving in your life,
therefore, your judgments on this matter carry very little weight," Dumbledore
retorted as he guided the automobile closer to the middle of the road. The road
was narrower than he thought and a scraping sound filled the car.
"Move over that way!" Moody scolded, reaching again for the steering
wheel.
"Mind your own business!"
"Oh sod it, Dumbledore, let me have the wheel!" Moody said through
gritted teeth.
"For someone who didn't even want to go on a walk in the first place
you certainly are putting up a fight now!" Dumbledore retorted.
"I, for one, care about the condition in which we return this
automobile to its owner."
"Oh, and I don't?" Just as they were really beginning to get into it,
a crunching sound filled the car and they looked up just in time to get a face-
full of branches.
"You weren't watching the road!" Moody yelled, letting go of the
steering wheel to protect his face as the hedge's branches scrapped painfully
over their faces. They careened through the hedgerow as Dumbledore struggled to
find a way to get the car back on the road. Pulling sticks out of his hair, he
shouted at Moody, "How could I have been watching the road while I was watching
you, trying to make sure you didn't take over command?"
"Merlin's beard, we're not on a ship," Moody shouted back, "There
is no chain of command!"
Dumbledore opened his mouth to reply, glanced at the road and forgot
all intent. "Tree!"
"What?" Moody turned to look in front of the car and frantically began motioning
at Dumbledore. "Break! Break! Press the break!"
"Which one is the break?" Dumbledore pressed on a couple but with the
car only went faster.
"No, not that one," the driving expert shouted, "The other one!"
"Which one?"
"The other one!"
CRASH!
