Josef and Mick were at Josef's house taste-testing blood types. Actually the testing was over and they were doing shots. The television was on but they weren't paying much attention until Josef caught sight of an image onscreen and turned up the volume.

"Well-known Boston attorney Denny Crane is hospitalized tonight after collapsing earlier today. Partner Shirley Schmidt of Crane Poole & Schmidt announced that he is stable and resting comfortably while they await test results."

The newsreader went on to the next topic.

Mick smiled. "He seems like kind of a clown sometimes but you gotta admire a guy who's endured like that."

"I knew him 45 years ago," Josef said. "When I went to New York for a year. We became friends, had some good times."

"Did he know you were a vampire?"

"No, I never told him. We smoked and drank and talked and dated a lot of women. It was easy to pass."

"Ever think about turning him?"

"I considered it, but only briefly."

"Because of Sarah? That was only a few years before."

"No, it was because of Denny. He was so completely human and enjoyed life so much. There's a difference between being alive and being undead. But I'd like to see him again. He may not have much time left."

"He can't know it's you."

"He won't. He knew me as Charles Fitzgerald. I'll be the son of his old friend. Hairstyles and clothes change. I'll look different enough."

Josef's private jet flew him to Logan International and a limo took him to the hospital. He sent in a card engraved 'Charles Fitzgerald' and the nurse came back immediately to show him in.

Denny was sitting up in bed. Josef had seen pictures of him over the years and knew he had aged but Denny didn't look weak or ill.

"It's really you, Charlie. I never thought I'd see you again."

"I'm his son," Josef said. "My name is Charles Fitzgerald, too."

Denny waved a hand dismissively. "You look just the same. But of course you would."

Josef had been prepared for this possibility. "You're confused, Mr. Crane," he said gently.

"Call me Denny, like you always did. And I'm not confused."

"What do you mean?"

Denny leaned forward conspiratorially. "You're a vampire, man!"

Josef was stuttering. "Wh .. Wh .. Why would you say that? Or even think it?"

Denny was shaking his head with a 'Don't try it' look. Josef gave up. "How long have you known?"

"Almost since we met."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"If you wanted me to know, you would have told me. I can keep a secret even without client privilege."

"How did you know? What did I do?"

"Nothing obvious. I picked up a few signs. I wouldn't have noticed except I had a little fling with a vampire that ended just before we met."

"You had a little fling with a vampire," Josef repeated. "Well, why not?"

"Exactly. Denny Crane: Open to new experiences. I'm still hoping to have sex with an alien. If I haven't already. How will I know?"

"So tell me about your affair."

"She was magnificent."

"Beautiful, of course?"

"In her own way. Not traditionally pretty but so much more, if you know what I mean."

Josef did. He thought of Sandrina. She wasn't a classic beauty, either, but she was the most attractive woman Josef had ever known. Also the most interesting. Josef didn't think he would ever be bored with her. There was always something new to discover.

Denny was reminiscing. "She was blonde but not brassy. Softer, quieter, kind of an ash blonde."

Josef was reminded of Sandrina again. She was a cool silvery blonde like moonlight. And Josef had always been partial to darkness with a touch of moonlight. Mick on the other hand, even though he had come to terms with being a vampire, still wanted light in his life. And there was Beth, a warm golden blonde like sunshine, and still human. Perfect for Mick.

"How did you meet?" Josef asked.

"You know I came to New York to open a branch office. My father told me not to furnish it with cheap modern junk. Quality is worth the price, he said. It makes the right impression. I went to an antique shop and she was the owner." Denny trailed off, lost in memory.

Josef was remembering too. He and Sandrina had exchanged stories about their pasts. Sandrina had been an antique dealer in New York in the early '60s. Could be a coincidence but Josef was getting a bad feeling. What name had she used then? "Julia Sanders."

"That's right," Denny said. "Did you know her?"

"You slept with my girlfriend!"

"I had no idea she was involved with anyone."

"Well, she wasn't," Josef admitted. "We only met last year. We live together in L.A."

"So I didn't sleep with your girlfriend after all." Denny seemed pleased. Josef was less satisfied. "You're upset, Charlie. Is it because I was first?"

Josef might have ground his teeth except his fangs had extended a little and were in the way. He got himself under control and reached for his cell phone. Sandrina's voice sounded a little apprehensive when she answered.

"Something you forgot to mention when I told you I was going to Boston to see Denny Crane? Anything at all? Give it some thought."

"He remembers me?"

"Of course he remembers you! Who could forget you even if you weren't a vampire?"

"I wasn't sure he would. He's elderly now and not well. I heard he might have Alzheimer's."

"I think it's an act," Josef snapped. "He's as sharp as a stake through my heart."

"Don't over-react, Josef. We didn't even know each other then."

Denny was making 'Give it to me' gestures.

"Your former lover would like a word." Josef handed over the phone.

"It's been a long time, Julie."

"How are you? The news sounded like a heart attack."

"Indigestion. They'll announce it tomorrow when they've thought of a way to spin it. So you and Charlie are together. You left New York before I met Charlie but when I realized what he was, I remember thinking you'd be perfect for each other."

"You were right. But he's a little jealous right now."

"It's understandable."

Josef was glaring. With his vampire senses he could hear both sides of the conversation.

Denny went on. "Remember that thing you did that started so innocently? Just your mouth on my neck. And then it got complicated. There was a pinky finger and an index finger ...?"

"And the ears."

"Oohh," Denny drew in a sharp breath. "I forgot about the ears."

"I've never done that to Josef."

"Now's the time. It's a good thing you saved it."

"Take care of yourself, Denny."

"It's wonderful to hear your voice, Julie." Denny ended the call and tossed the phone to Josef. "She'll make it up to you when you get home."

"Unbelievable. You just arranged a sexual favor with my girlfriend."

"For you, Charlie. You'll thank me later. You're not still angry, are you?"

Josef sighed and shook his head. "No, it was just unexpected. I don't know why. I meet the love of my undead existence and it's only natural that she should have slept with Denny Crane. It's not an exclusive club."

"My ex-wives aren't even an exclusive club."

"The worst part will be when Mick finds out."

"Who is Mick?"

"A vampire friend in L.A."

"Don't tell him. Julie won't say anything."

"I have to," Josef said. "It's a form of masochism. The story won't be complete until Mick has heard it and mocked me."

Denny smiled. "I have a friend like that. You know I'm strictly hetero, Charlie, but Alan and I are almost gay."

Josef laughed. "So are Mick and I. Is that a sign of true friendship or repressed homosexuality?"

"Friendship of course. I love Alan but he doesn't have the necessary accessories for my sexual fulfillment."

"Well put. I'd forgotten what it was like talking with you."

The door to Denny's room opened. There was a series of popping sounds and a voice said, "I'm sorry, Denny. I didn't know you had a visitor."

Josef turned to see a stocky man in a suit with his hands pressed to the front of his thighs. He had a cherubic face and fair hair.

"Come on in," Denny said. "This is Charles Fitzgerald, the son of an old friend. Jerry Espenson from the firm."

"Hello," Jerry said stiffly. "Welcome, hello." And then to Denny: "I have a client to visit. I'll stop by later." He left with a hop and a skip. Josef could have sworn he heard purring.

"He seemed a little ... twitchy."

"Don't mince words, man," Denny replied. "He's peculiar. But it's not his fault. He has Tourette's, Asperger's, something like that. He fits right in at the firm. There are a lot of odd people working there. My fault, probably. I don't mind quirks, it makes people individuals. We're becoming a bunch of politically correct clones."

"Vampires have quirks, too, beginning with where they live. And that includes me. You know that vampires like the cold and sleep in freezers? There are plenty of big cities that are cold at least part of the year. Boston, Chicago, Minneapolis and Denver have about 25 vampires each. New York City only has a hundred. But L.A. where it's hot and sunny year-round has 400. How do you explain that?"

"Simple, you're freaks. No offense, Charlie, but vampires are in the freak category. And L.A. is full of freaks. Just look at Hollywood. You're seeking your own kind."

Josef nodded. "Makes sense. Why didn't that occur to me?"

"Denny Crane: Thinking outside the box."

Denny was quiet then, looking at Josef. "The view from here is the same but your view has changed."

"You've aged, of course, but somehow you look exactly like Denny Crane should look. Back in New York, I considered telling you I was a vampire and asking if you wanted to be turned. In the end I decided it wouldn't suit you. Was I wrong?"

"You were right. I've been Denny Crane for 75 years. That's who I want to be."

"You could have been Denny Crane forever."

"How old are you?"

"409."

"And how many identities have you had?"

"At least 20."

"There you go. Every 20 years I'd have to be someone else. This way I do get to be Denny Crane forever."

"Denny Crane: Dead or alive."

"I wish I'd said that."

"Feel free to use it."

Josef studied Denny then, getting a sense of what it would be like to grow old, reluctantly and not always with grace or dignity; but inevitably, and with humor.

"This visit has been a revelation," Josef said. "It's a privilege and a pleasure to know you."

"Same for me," Denny replied. "Not many humans know about vampires. I count two as friends and I've slept with one of them."

"If only I had the necessary accessories, you could be two for two."

They laughed. Josef took Denny's hand. "Goodbye, Denny Crane."

Denny patted Josef's shoulder. "Goodbye, Charles Fitzgerald."

Back in L.A. Josef and Sandrina lay in bed in their room freezer. Sandrina was waiting for the verdict.

"It was ... interesting." Josef was trying to sound casual and unimpressed.

"Interesting," Sandrina scoffed. "You screamed like a banshee."

"All right, it was very innovative. I don't expect to be surprised sexually anymore."

"You don't really mind about me and Denny Crane?"

"Actually, I'm trying to think of something I can send him that he might like but won't kill him. No scotch or cigars. I don't want to contribute to his demise."

A few weeks later Denny sat at his desk smiling at a small, beautifully framed photograph. Jerry entered with a case file and glanced at the picture. "I met him at the hospital. The son of your old friend."

Denny nodded. "And that's his girlfriend. They live in L.A. Now those two are a couple of real bloodsuckers."

"But they look so nice," Jerry burbled. "Not like lawyers at all!"