Disclaimer: Not mine, just playing with them
Fashion show
It was the charity event of the year. A large fashion show. Over a hundred people had paid a lot of money to watch the latest creations of some posh couturiers, modelled by the Navy's and Marine's finest. Among them were Harm and Mac of course, as well as Mac's boyfriend Mic Brumby.
Despite the fuss Mac loved to wear the magnificent cloths, especially those designed by Shemar, a young Afro-American couturier. They were simple though classy and seemed to flow like water or a gentle summer breeze.
It was busy behind the curtains. Correct that, it was downright chaotic. Both women and men were changing into new outfits, cosmeticians were applying fresh make-up and helpers taking care of accessories. Day dresses having been modelled, now it was time for the evening dresses and gowns, before the traditional big finale: the bride and groom.
It was break time. In the hall girls with trays with refreshments were walking around. Behind the curtains Mac gratefully gulped her coffee before she let herself be dressed by one of the helpers again. In the meantime she let her eyes wander the room. Mic really had to show up by now! After all, he and she were chosen to wear the bridal outfits. Meaning Mac was going to were a gown and Mic his dress white.
Suddenly she noticed a bit of commotion at the door. Shemar threw his arms in the air. "This can't be happening," she heard him yell.
Instantly all eyes were on him.
After some moments an assistant dared to ask "What's wrong?"
"That guy Mic! His taxi is stuck in traffic. An accident. No way he is going to make it!" Shemar slammed his cell phone shut. "Who is going to fill in for him! Can you tell me that!"
There was total silence. No one dared to speak. Finally Mac said "Maybe my co-worker Harmon Rabb. He is here and in his dress white as well."
"That's the dark haired Navy man, right? He modelled some suits?"
"Yes, that's him."
The couturier tilted his head to study Mac. "I think he will look good next to you. Right!" He turned to one of his assistants. "Find that man for me!"
In the large hall Harm had been standing and watching the crowd . Not that he was particular interested in the dresses and suits, in fact there was only one woman he had eyes for and she belonged to another. Suddenly he felt someone tug his sleeve.
"Mr Rabb?"
Surprised he looked aside.
"Yes?"
"Shemar wants you backstage, Sir."
Harm frowned. "Why? I already modelled my share."
"I don't know, Sir."
A little unwillingly Harm followed the man backstage where he found an agitated Shemar and an angry looking Mac, who wasted no time in filling him in.
"Mic is stuck in traffic and can't be here in time for the big finale. I'm sorry but you have to stand in for him."
Harm's first reaction was to refuse. He didn't want to walk next to Mac while she wore a wedding gown, knowing she was engaged to another man. It was hard enough to witness her in that dress, let alone be part of it for a few short moments and then going back to reality. But he knew he couldn't refuse. After all, this was duty and he shouldn't forget that. So he nodded and had Shemar explain to him what he was expected to do.
In the mean time Mac was fighting her own emotions. She was angry at Mic for showing up late, for not taking this serious, for putting her into this position. She knew she was unreasonable but couldn't help it; the stress of the show was getting the better of her.
And there was Harm. The man who was always ready to have her back. He shouldn't have to do this and she knew he hated it. Not helping her out but the whole modelling thing and now he was forced to fill in for the man he detested. But there was no other way!
Moments later the sound of the bell indicated the end of the interval. Once more the lady speaker took her place and started to announce the different mannequins. Since Mac had to model four more gowns before the grand finale she put every thought out of her mind and concentrated on the task at hand. In the meantime Harm made sure he was not standing in someone's way.
The show neared its end. Wagner's Bridal March started to play, then faded away again, to be replaced by a dreamy melody.
Harm held his hand out to Mac and slowly they tread upon the catwalk. The lights had been dimmed and a shower of sparkling lights flooded over them. A sigh went through the crowd but other then that there was only the soft music.
Mac and Harm were in a dream. At the end of the catwalk he turned her around, once, twice, to give the audience a good look at the dress. Their eyes locked for a moment and Mac forgot how to breathe. Then the moment was over and they made their way back to the curtains.
The moment they left the stage Mac all but ran to the ladies changing room. One of the helpers assisted her in stripping the wedding gown off and changing into one of the other gowns once more. After all, there was a party she had to attend.
In the mean time Mac tried to pull herself together. His look … it had been so intense. So almost desperate. The same intensity it had had a few weeks earlier, during their engagement party. Correction, not their engagement party, hers and Mic's. The confusion which she had felt then was back in full force.
When she left the room she was back in stoic Marine mood. She was not, repeat, not going to show how she felt. A decision for which she needed every inch of her strength to hold on to when he was standing right outside the door.
"They are waiting for us," was the only thing he said. His face was devoid of any expression when he proffered his arm.
When they entered all eyes were on them and there was a thunderous applause. Satisfied the Admiral nodded to them; his crew had done him proud. Except for one, he thought looking aside where Mic was standing, a crabbed look on his face. He had made it after all, almost an hour late. A talk, first thing Monday morning, the Admiral promised himself.
In the room the crowd had made way for Harm and Mac to have the first dance, a dance of honour. The small combo started to play and with a strained smile Harm reached out for Mac to lead her to the floor. The circled in silence until Mac asked "What are you thinking?"
Harm let out a wry chuckle. "That you're the most beautiful woman in the room, the most beautiful woman I know and that I was a fool and a jerk back then in Australia."
Mac couldn't agree more on the latter but refrained from telling him so. She didn't want to pick a fight. It was neither the time nor the place. His next words however shook her to the core.
"I can't do this, Mac. I can't watch you being with Brumby, wearing his ring. I thought knowing you were happy was enough but I can't take it anymore. Monday morning I will ask the Admiral for a TAD and a reassignment."
The song ended and with a formal bow he released her. He led her to her table and excused himself. A few moments later she saw him leave the room.
Mac was flabbergasted. The only thing she saw was the look in his eyes. She was about to run after him when she was stopped by the Admiral requesting a dance. Knowing Harm would be most likely in his car and driving off before she even reached the door, she turned to her CO and let him lead her to the dance floor.
It didn't take Chegwidden long to notice Mac's distress and, being the straightforward man he was, he did not waste time in asking what was wrong.
Mac hesitated. Telling the Admiral how she felt about Harm could be tricky. Even though they weren't together, fraternization rules would kick in. On the other hand, if she said nothing Harm might be reassigned to God knows where before she even had the change to sort things out between them.
In an unlikely display of patience Chegwidden waited for her to make her mind up. Slowly Mac confided her doubts about her relation with Mic and the words of Harm said just minutes earlier. She ended with "Sir, can you please stall Harm's request so I can sort things out with him?"
The Admiral smiled. He had seen this coming for a long time. In fact, there had been many occasions he had been itching to step in. Now that Mac asked for his help, he was happy to give it.
"I will," he promised. "But you, don't wait too long to get him out of his misery. And don't worry about fraternization rules. I will look into that, too."
Mac led out a relieved breath. She knew her CO would do anything he was able to.
Now it was Mic's turn to dance with her and the rest of the evening Mac had barely time to have a drink.
When the crowd started to leave, Mac went back to the dressing rooms to change. To her surprise she was followed by the couturier. Again he complimented her with her performance, telling her he was sure the fundraising would be a great success, thanks to her. Mac smiled wearily. All she wanted to do was change and go home. She knew Mic was waiting to bring her home and she was sure that he would have some things to say about her and Harm. She was not looking forward to that but knew it couldn't be avoided. Straightening her shoulders she remembered there were one or two things she herself wanted to say as well.
Suddenly she realized Shemar had stopped talking and clearly was waiting for an answer.
"Sorry, I zoomed out for a moment. It was a long day. What were you asking?"
"Don't worry. It was a long day and I understand you are tired. I was saying I want to offer you one of the dresses you were wearing tonight. As I said, you made the evening."
Mac's jaw dropped. This she hadn't seen coming. Those gowns were way above her league. Immediately the dress she wanted most popped up in her mind. The wedding gown. But only if she could wear it with Harm at her side.
"I'm stunned," she told Shemar. "I would love to have one of these. They are so beautiful. I felt like a princess wearing them. But can you give me a bit of time to decide? There is … uhm … there is something I have to sort out before I can pick one."
Shemar nodded. "That's okay. But let me know as soon as possible, okay?" With a few more flattering words he left and closed the door behind him.
Outside Mic was waiting. Together they walked to the car and Mic took the driver's seat.
"Where are the keys?"
Without a word Mac handed them over. Even though it was her car, Mic would insist on driving, she realized. This in contrast to Harm who liked to drive but didn't mind someone else behind the wheel. She bit back a sigh.
It was a tense ride. It was clear Mic was furious and that showed in his ranting as well as in his driving. He turned a corner slipping and Mac clenched her teeth. This was it. If she wasn't decided before, now she was. She realised it wasn't a good idea to infuriate him even further while he was driving so she bided her time. Luckily they were almost at her place. Her lack of answers had served to calm Mic down a bit, thinking he had got his point, but when Mac looked aside she realised he was still angry. Moments later he turned into the parking lot in front of her apartment building and stopped with screeching tires. She was out of the car before he could make an attempt to help her.
When they reached her apartment Mac wanted nothing more than a long hot shower, a cup of cocoa and peace. But she knew she wasn't going to get it and she was right.
As soon as they had entered Mic threw the keys on the coffee table and burst out once more.
"Why didn't you wait for me? Or refused to model that bridal … thing!"
He paced up and down, working himself into a rage once more.
"And to add insult to injury, you had to choose him! Him of all people. Harm is out of picture, you know! You are mine. He should back off, and fast or I will tell him!"
He slammed his fist in his other hand.
"That self-righteous punk has been interfering with our relation from day one. He never thought me good enough for you!"
Now Mac became angry as well.
"Mic, stop it! It wasn't me not showing up in time."
He wanted to interrupt but she stopped him.
"Yes, I know there was an accident and you couldn't help it. But you should have been here at 7pm sharp. It was you who chose to bring a friend to the airport first and have dinner with him. If you have driven straight from JAG to the hotel it would have been no problem. Secondly: the show had to go on. It was a big event, both for the charity institution as for Shemar and the other couturiers. Something had to be done to solve the problem, the problem of you, Mic, not showing up and, Harm was asked to step in. He didn't volunteer."
"Still you should have said no."
"Mic, it wasn't my call." She wisely left out the part that she named Harm as a possible replacement. "Stop blaming it on me, or on anybody else, for that matter, except yourself! Shemar …"
"So now you're on first name base with him as well, huh? Is he your next target?"
Mac fisted her hands.
"Shemar and I got along well, yes. And that is none of your business. Besides I don't even know whether Shemar is his first of last name. It's just Shemar."
"I don't care. I just want you to remember who you belong to."
Mac stiffened. This was the last straw. She didn't belong to, to no one, most of all not to him and she was going to tell him now!
"Mic, it's over. I'm breaking up with you. You are unreasonable and jealous of everyone you think gets a bit of attention from me. I can't live like that. I don't belong to you!"
She slid his ring from her finger and held it out to him. "It's over."
For a moment he was stunned. Then he put a step forwards as if he was going to attack. Mac tensed her muscles, ready to deliver a few kicks and blows if he touched her. But he didn't.
"You … you … witch!" He snatched the ring out of her hand and threw it as far he could.
Then he turned on his heels and strode out, slamming the door behind him.
Mac stayed behind blowing out a breath.
Outside Harm's loft
1.30am
Deciding against knocking, she took the spare key she still had to let herself in. At first she thought the loft was deserted but then she spotted him slumped down on the couch, a bottle in front of him. A quick glance told her it was water and she heaved a silent sigh of relief. She herself was all too aware of the danger of drinking, especially when you are depressed.
He didn't react to her coming in; he even didn't seem to have noticed it.
She walked over and sat down in front of him.
For a moment he didn't look up, then slowly turned his face towards her.
"Did you mean it?" she whispered, not able to control her voice.
He didn't ask for clarification and nodded "Every word."
Mac took a deep breath. "I broke up with Mic."
Harm was stunned. His eyes widened and for a moment he could only gape. "You … you did?' he finally stammered.
Mac nodded.
"Why? Was it because …?"
Mac hesitated; how would she put it. She didn't want to reveal too much yet.
"When we drove home," she started "Mic was angry. Angry because we didn't wait for him, angry the show was a success without him, angry with me for dancing with a lot of men afterwards. He was jealous … of you …"
Harm nodded. Considering he had spent the last two hours fighting his own jealousy towards Mic this made sense.
"But not only of you. Of Bud, of the Admiral …"
Harm's jaw dropped.
"Yes, because I danced with them, too. Of Shemar … basically of every man I had contact with that evening. And suddenly I recognized a pattern." She went silent.
"What pattern?" Harm asked after a while.
"Jealousy. It's not only tonight he was jealous. He always has been. He wants my undivided attention. And then he said something …" Silence again.
"What did he say?" Harm had to ask.
"I just want you to remember who you belong to." She clenched her fists. "Belong to. I belonged to him. At least that's how he sees it, how he wants to see it. I'm exclusively his."
She looked at Harm.
"Harm, I do not belong to; I'm no one's property. And I knew, this was it."
"What do you mean?"
"Mic is … I mean, if I go on with Mic he would …"
"You mean he is going to act more possessive, controlling, even might become … abusive?" He hated to formulate it like that but he had to be clear. Mac nodded sadly.
"Yes. I've seen it too many times. You know, there is a fine line between being jealous because and …" She shook her head helplessly; she couldn't explain. "I have been ignoring signs all along, telling myself he loved me and things would work out well. But now I can't anymore. It's just, he crossed the line. I know ..." She hung her head.
Harm stood and went to get her a bottle of water, too. In passing by he ran his hand over her shoulder, making her almost lose it.
In silence they sat and sipped their drinks.
Suddenly Mac set down her glass and asked "What if you were given a second change?"
"I would grab it with both hands," he vowed.
"I'm giving you that change now."
Carefully, almost like he was afraid to break it, he placed his bottle back on the table. He took a deep breath.
"Mac, I said I was a jerk and a fool back then in Australia. I was. Believe me; I spend countless nights thinking to find out for myself why. Why was I so clumsy, so cryptic? Why didn't I tell you why I might need more time? Why didn't I just say yes and kiss you senseless?"
He turned towards her and took both of her hands in his.
"Mac, I love you. I'm in love with you. That is what I should have told you back then: how much you mean to me and how empty my life is without you. I love you so much."
He dipped his head to kiss her hands. Despite her resolution not to cry Mac felt tears well up.
"I love you, too," she sniffled.
Harm stood and pulled her up, too. A moment later she was in his arms. He buried his face in her neck, too full with emotions to utter another word before he kissed her and she wrapped her arms around his neck.
Later they sat on the couch, Mac in his lap, and talked. Harm once more apologized for being a ass back then but Mac told him to stop beating himself up.
"Was it because of what happened at your engagement party?" he wanted to know.
"That too," Mac confessed. "It was your kiss but even more the moment the three of us ..."
Harm forcefully kept his face from screwing up.
"The moment the three of us stood listening to the Admiral's speech made me realize … You know, I held hands with Mic and felt nothing. Our hands barely touched and I felt my body tingle all over. I realized my feelings for you weren't dead, only buried. Buried so deep I didn't know they were still alive. I was so confused over the past weeks. I gave Mic my promise but at the same time I had so many feelings for another man. For you."
Harm had to kiss her before he spoke.
"I felt so guilty after I kissed you. I wanted you but you 'belonged'," he gave her a quick smile to show how he meant that "to someone else. I never considered myself a poacher."
Mac ran her hand through his hair. It felt so good to finally be able to touch him, she thought absentmindedly.
"I know," she soothed him.
"I broke up with Renée the next day," Harm went on. "It wasn't fair to her. She was upset but she understood. She told me Mic and she talked about us on your engagement party. About giving us time to say goodbye."
Mac nodded thoughtfully.
"Mic mentioned that, too. I guess he convinced himself it was just that, saying goodbye and that from that moment on he had me for himself. Little did he know …" She rested her head against Harm's shoulder, suddenly worn-out.
Harm felt her swoon and gently shook her.
"It's off to bed with you, lady. You're exhausted."
Mac nodded.
"Stay with me?"
"I don't want to be somewhere else," he whispered in her ear.
A bit later when they were lying cuddled together in his bed she brought up another subject.
"Shemar offered me one of his dresses."
Harm was impressed.
"Wow, he must really like you. Those dresses are worth a fortune. Did you already make a choice?"
"I told him I would think about it and tell him as soon as possible." Mac couldn't help comparing Harm's reaction to Mic's.
"You know…" Harm sounded a bit insecure. "This evening when I led you down the catwalk in that wedding dress …" he swallowed. "It felt like we were marrying, for real, I mean." Embarrassed he went silent.
Mac reached out and caressed his cheek.
"Me too. And I felt so guilty, being engaged with one man and feeling like marrying another. But it showed me I couldn't go on like that. And Mic's reaction did the rest. All the little things I reasoned away, like his dislike of JAG-gatherings and him wanting to take me with him back to Australia, fell into place. It never would have worked, not in the long run, and I am happy to have found out in time."
"Did you already decide which dress …?"
Mac bit her lip, not knowing how much to reveal. She wanted the wedding dress but didn't want to pressure him.
"You know I will propose to you, real soon, don't you?" came Harm's quiet voice.
Mac sucked in a breath. She hadn't expected him to be so open about his intentions.
"No, I didn't. But I hoped," she whispered.
His breath tickling her temple was warm and soothing.
"I will, I will. Soon," he promised.
Next day
Harm's loft
"Colonel MacKenzie speaking."
"Ah, Mac. Did you decide on the dress?"
"Yes, I did. You said I could choose whichever dress I liked, didn't you?"
"Yes, any from the ones you modelled, that is."
"I'd like the wedding dress, please."
"Good choice. So you're getting married. With that prick that showed up late?"
"Nope, I'm going to marry the right man."
A content chuckle came from the other site of the line.
"Great. I'll arrange for the dress to be sent to the JAG office. Be sure to send me an invitation for the wedding."
"We will do that. And Shemar, thank you so much."
"You're welcome."
The call ended Mac turned towards Harm and he wrapped his arms around her.
"Love you."
"Love you, too."
The end