A/N: Yo, yo! Do I have a Halloween Special for you all! It's called Luigi's Mansion of Horror; it's basically a series of one-shots, which I only will write on during October! Here's the first story.
Disclaimer: I own nothing Nintendo related.
Segment 1: Luigi's Boo Haw-Haw Bash
Luigi was hiding underneath a dusty old table breathing heavily; he was doing his usual cowering. Luigi had already been inside the mansion for sometime now and already he was beginning to feel the affects of fatigue kicking onto him.
"Ah, man…Those Boos are crazy! Everywhere I go, there they are. They won't leave me alone!!" Luigi whimpered. "OOH! Why did I even decide to come back herrrreeee?!"
"Oh...That's right! Daisy called me the day before and told me that she wanted to meet me here, alone, so we could make out...And go straight to second base and then take that homeboy all the way HOME!" Luigi then placed his hand on his chin. "But, I'm beginning to think that I've been tricked. When I sorta think about it, her voice did sound somewhat masculine and she kept giggling...eerie like." he then sighed. "...I think I let my hormones got the best of me..."
Luigi then started to notice that the mansion had grew deafen silence. "Uhh...I...Wonder what happened to all those boos?" he muttered, slowly moving his head from under the table. That when Luigi saw the weirdest thing. "Uhh…What the?"
Luigi saw a bunch of Boos huddled up in a group; they seemed to be concealing something. "Wonder what they're hiding?" Luigi said to himself.
One of the Boos then floated up in the air. "Weeehehehehehe!" the little ghost cackled. "Since Luigi fled away…AGAIN…I guess there's only one thing to do…" the boo then grinned, showing his fangs.
"OH, NO!!" Luigi shrieked, hiding behind the table again. "Waaaaaaaaaah…I'll bet it's something horribly…no something unspeakably evil!!" he whimpered, pulling his hat over his face. "…I want my mommy!"
Then suddenly, the Boo pulled out a silver boom box. "IT'S TIME TOO PARTY, YOU MUTHABOOERS!!" the little ghost chuckled, placing a Russian fez on his head. "ACKMERRH…MEHACK ERRHH!!" (Trust me, I wasn't trying to be racist either folks. I just don't speak Russian)
"Dude, what was that?" Another Boo said, floating next to the Boo with the Russian fez on his head.
"Hehehe. I was speaking Russian. Neat, huh?" The Boo said, chuckling.
"Dude, that's wasn't Russian. That was just you jabbering random words...If you even want to call those things coming out your mouth words!" The Boo said, staring annoyingly at the lead Boo. "Beside, since when did you, a Boo, learn how speak Russian?"
The fez wearing Boo just stared at the other Boo. "Oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't aware that you were an expert in speaking the Russian language." he said sarcastically. "Let me ask you: Do you know how to speak Russian?"
"Umm…Well, no." The Boo replied hesitantly.
"Wait, you don't? Well, then let me give to you some much-needed advise…Ahem...shut the hell up talking to me!!" The fez wearing Boo yelled, floating away from the other Boo. "Trying to tell me what I can and can't do! The nerves of some Boos." he grumbled.
"Whatever, I know for a fact what you were saying wasn't Russian. You don't need to be an expert to know that, it's just common sense." The other Boo murmured, floating in the opposite direction.
Another Boo then floated by. "C'mon ya! We shouldn't be sweating each other! We're supposed to be partying! It's Halloween, for crying out loud!"
The Boo then pressed the button down on the stereo, the Luigi's Mansion theme from SSBB was heard blaring out. "Weheheheheheh!" The Boo giggled, spinning up in the air and then disappearing!
The music blared all throughout the whole mansion; it could even be heard from outdoors. "Stellar!!" all the Boos in the mansion chuckled, as they all started bobbing around the boom box, holding each other nubs.
"Uhahahahahaha…Some party, right? Seriously, the only reason why I even came to this shindig was to get like totally plastered, man!" A drunk Boo chuckled to another, somber, Boo.
"Uhh…Do I know you?" The Boo said, covering his nose. "Eh, man, you came here to get drunk? It seems to me that you've already gotten there, dude." The Boo then floated away from the drunken Boo. "…Jackass."
"Uhh…You're no fun, anyhow! You lame!" The drunken Boo then looked around and saw a female Boo; she was dancing around with some other Boos. "Jackpot." The drunken Boo chuckled, floating over the female Boo.
The girl Boo was laughing with some other Boos, when she suddenly smelt something stinky. "Ehh…What's that horrid stench?" she then turned and saw drunk Boo standing behind her, grinning. "Uhh…Hello…" she muttered, slowly floating backwards.
"Damn, you're hot! What's your name, baby!" The Boo sniggered, floating around the girl Boo.
"Ehh…C…Can I help you?" The girl Boo said, rolling her eyes.
"Hehehe. You sure can help me. How about giving a Boo those digits?"
"…Ehh…I really shouldn't." The girl Boo said, almost throwing up on herself. "I really should get going. My Boofriend is over there waiting."
The girl Boo then tried leaving, but the drunken Boo quickly floated in front of her. "C'mon babe, don't be like that! Give me those digits. I'll promise to leave you, if you do…maybe." he grinned.
"Didn't I already tell you that I'm not interested in you?! Beside, I already have a Boofriend." The girl Boo sighed.
However, the drunken Boo was persistent and everytime she trying leaving he would just float in her way. "That's it! I'm tiring of trying to be nice with you!" she shrieked, her face red from anger.
Another Boo then floated next to the drunken Boo and female Boo, he was a bit buffer than the regular Boos. "Hey, is there a problem here?" he then turned and glared at the drunken Boo. "Are you bothering this Boo?"
"Yeah, but it's no concern to you, though!" The drunken Boo said, shoving the buff Boo. "…Meathead!"
The buff Boo quickly caught himself and glared at the drunken Boo. "…You know what? I don't like your disposition, fella."
"Like I care." The drunken Boo said as he hiccupped loudly. "Why don't you take you and your peanut size brain and go flex somewhere in a dark corner. Because, I'm not the one to be lecture by a guy with a 3rd grade education, fag."
"Hey, you're really beginning to try my nerves, man!" The buff Boo huffed.
"Hey, man, don't get mad at me. You need to stop taking all those steroids. It's not my fault your manhood is becoming minuscule."
"Oh, crud!" The girl Boo gasped, while covering her mouth. "Are you really gonna let him go and insult you like that?"
The buff Boo face then turned red. "Heck no!" he then turned to the drunk Boo. "Why you puny little Boo!" he growled. "I'm gonna grind you into the ground!" he then started floating toward the other Boo, while cracking his knuckles…err…nubs. "After I'm finish with you, you're gonna be reduce down to nothing but ectoplasm!"
However, the drunken Boo just looked at him and chuckled. "Oh, I'm shaking in my invisible boots. Yeah, right. Like I suppose to afraid of some guy who still lives with his mom and cries nonstop whenever somebody calls him a mommy's boy."
"S…Shut up!" The buff Boo sniveled. "I don't stay with my mom and I…I'm not a mommy's boy! Take it back, right now!"
"Oh, what's wrong? Don't tell me that mommy's little man's about shed a tear?" The drunken Boo chuckled. "Oh, which reminds me." he then turned to the girl Boo. "Mommy's little man still sleeps with a teddy bear named, FuzzFuzz, because without it, he wouldn't sleep at all."
"…I…For your information my bear name's is Mister Puffenpops!" The oversize Boo then ran away, holding his face. "Wahahahahaha! You jerk!!"
"So, baby, how about those digits, eh?" The Boo chortled.
"You know what? You smell like beer, you have bad manners, you're rude, and you're just straight up nasty…" The female Boo said, glaring at him. "Here's my number…"
"…Awesome…" The drunken Boo chortled as him and girl Boo floated away laughing, while talking at each other.
Luigi stood there watching with his mouth agape. "…What was that?" He then turned and watched as the Boos continued dancing around each other, repetitively! "W-What're they doing? They're all insane!!" As Luigi rose to his feet, he accidentally bumped into the wall. "Whoops." he yelped.
A Boo was floating nearby where Luigi was hiding, when he suddenly noticed him standing there. "…What the?!" The Boo gasped, dropping his pumpkin shaped cupcake. "Hey, guys, hey, guys? Look! Over here, guys! I…It's…LUIGI?!" The Boo yelped, pointing down at Luigi.
"Oh, shit!! He saw our repetitive dancing! And heard my fake Russian language!!" the fez wearing Boo shrieked, while flailing around. "HE MUSN'T ESCAPE HERE, ALIVE!!" he shrieked in a Scottish Accent.
"I knew it!...Wait, now you're Scottish, too?" The Boo that was fussing with the fez wearing Boo said, looking annoyed.
Luigi then went to run away, but the Boo next to him tried blocking his way. "Oh, no you don't, buster! You're not going ANYWHERE, Weheheheheheh!!"
However, Luigi just ran right through him, screaming like a little schoolgirl. "Wahahahahahahah!!"
"….Uhh…O…Oh, no you just didn't run right through me?!" The Boo gasped loudly, while slowly turning toward Luigi. "That's like the most disrespectful thing you could do to a Boo." he then started holding himself. "…I…I feel so…violated." the Boo then started whimpering.
"What're you guys waiting for?!" The fez wearing Boo snarled, slapping all the Boos around the boom box. "We can't let that dip escape from here! We got our pride as ghastly Boos on the line here!"
"YEAHHHHH!!" All the Boos said in unison.
"Yeah, now let's get that simp! We're gonna give him a scary that he'll never forget!" The fez wearing Boo cackled, while rubbing his nubs together.
"Yeah, when we're done with him, he'll be peeing his pants for all eternally!" A random Boo said, as he floated by the fez Boo and started cackling with him.
"Exactly, my Boorethren!" The fez Boo cackled again.
The Boo that was fussing with Fez Boo earlier just stood there staring at him as he laughed so hard that his eyes started rolling to the back of his head. "…Eh, dude? What in the hell's wrong with you?"
"Onward to victory my Boorethren! We have a Date With Destiny!" The Fez Boo then turned toward you, the readers and started moving his eyebrows up and down, while smirking. "MOVE OUT!!"
The Boos then started chasing Luigi around the mansion again. It was like a horrible rerun of Scooby Doo inside there.
Luigi was still running in front of the Boos, when he noticed the exit not too far where he was. "Oh, goody! The exit!" he sighed outta relief. "Now, I can finally get the heck outta here."
Luigi was almost to the exit, when a weeping Boo suddenly appeared out of nowhere in front the door. "WA…Wha…What the?!" he stammered, almost tripping on himself.
"Sniff…Y…You thought what you did to me was funny, didn't you?" The weeping Boo muttered, wiping a tear. "Well, you weren't and if you think so…WELL THEN YOU'RE DEAD WRONG!!"
"…What…What're you talking about?" Luigi muttered, slowly stepping back from the Boo. The other Boos were seen in the background catching up with Luigi and the Boo.
"Don't play dumb with me, Luigi!" The Boo snarled, showing his fangs. Luigi just gulped. "What you did to me was, was, was…unspeakably devious!"
"Listen, I don't know what you're talking about! How would I know if I did something to you? You Boos all look the same to meeeeeeee!!" Luigi yelped out.
"You…LIAR!" The Boo screamed as he spun up in the air. "After I'm done with you, Luigi, trust me, you're not gonna have to worry about trying to tell us apart, anymore!"
Luigi just stood there with his mouth agape as the tiny Boo started his monstrous transformation, transforming into a giant Boo with huge fangs and two huge, long visible saber like teeth sticking out. "…Mama-Mia…" he murmured staring up the giant Boo.
"Boooooooo…MONGOUS!!" The huge monstrous Boo bellowed throughout the mansion.
"Dude…I even didn't know we could that…" The fez Boo muttered, watching as Boomongous slowly bobbed toward Luigi.
"N…No…S-Stay back…I…I'm warning you, Boo!" Luigi said, shooting Green Fireball that went spewing every which away.
"Oh, how cute!" Boomongous grinned. "But, I do hope you're ready. I hope you're ready to become acquainted with your new home…Which is gonna be located inside my intestines!" Boomongous said opening his mouth. "Bon Appetit!
"WAAAAHHHHH!!" Luigi shrieked, running right through Boomongous and completely outta the mansion. "MAAAARRRRIIIOOOOOOOO!!" Luigi yelped, as he went through Boo Woods.
Boomongous just stood there with his mouth wide open. "D…Did he just? I know he just didn't do what I think he did? I…I can't believe he did it, AGAIN." he then shouted. That son of a bit…"
A/N: And that, kiddies, is the reason why you shouldn't let your BALLS cloud your better judgement.
The End and Happy Halloween!