I walked into the dimly lit room. The glow of a small lamp was barely visible in the corner.
John Conner.
His scar, the same as I remember, reflected clearly off the shadows of the lamp. His eyes were red and tired but his face was strong and expressionless. He looked up from his desk.
I froze forgetting what I had come here for.
"Reese," he said calmly, beckoning me with his hand to come.
I began to walk ahead, the pain of my previous mission wounds disappearing as I walked toward the great legend.
I can't believe I'm doing this. I thought to myself as I reached his small desk.
The small glow of the lamp was just bright enough to cover the entire top of the desk. Neatly placed on it were a few papers, a small writing pen, and an old type of tape recorder I have never seen before. The tape inside of it titled, 'John'.
Seeing where my gaze was, John Conner slowly took the recorder and slipped it in the desk's drawer. I instantly felt foolish.
I had asked to meet with him and all I have done so far is peep in his business. I have made myself look weak; he will never accept me now. John looked at me.
"Curiosity is not a sin; it merely shows you are very cautious and aware of your surroundings." He said smiling at my panicked expression.
"Yes sir," was the only thing I could pull out of my jumbled up mind.
He leaned back in his chair a little looking at me.
"So Reese, what are you here for?"
My tongue twisted in my mouth... "I…" I said swallowing.
Don't show fear.
"I came here about the mission you sent out." I said my voice strong.
He nodded acknowledging the fact. "Yes?"
I stood up straight. "I would like to volunteer sir."
His eyes for a moment flashed to his desk drawer. In the next second, he was looking back up at me. He cleared his throat.
"You are the youngest in AH5 group?" He said changing the subject.
I nodded. "Yes sir."
"If my memory stands, the AH5 group is highest ranking, is it not?"
I became shifty with worry. Was he making a point why he should not accept my request? Or why he should demote me?
I swallowed down the thickening fear welling in my throat. "Yes sir." I said keeping my voice as fearless as possible.
"I have a question for you Reese."
Oh, here it comes. I thought to myself, preparing for the final blow.
"Why do you want to do this?"
I was not prepared for this. I took a breath in, words coming to me.
"I feel it's what I'm meant to do, sir. I know this mission is very important to you and I know that I am not your most skilled fighter… but I will train. I will train my hardest and I will become the great warrior that is needed to accomplish this mission. I believe I can do this. I really do. If these terminators succeed, we would all cease to exist right alongside you. You are the only hope we have."
He looked at me showing no expression in his hazel eyes. I stared at him, wanting him to know how true my words really were. Finally the thin silence was broken.
"I have seen you fight, Reese. Not only have I seen you fight, I have fought along beside you."
The brief memory flashed through my mind.
The flashing lights of red, the thick smell of blood and burnt hair, and Skynet's detention center crumbling all around us.
I have never been able to shake the wrenching fear churning inside of me of that day.
"I knew since the day you joined the resistance, you were meant for great things."
I glanced down at the little red strip of clothing on my torn jacket, its brilliant red color hard to miss in the brown.
I had gotten that the day I joined the Resistance.
I will never forget that moment.
Nor the friends I lost with it.
John paused, a distracted look in his eyes.
"You know you will never be able to return Kyle," he said looking me in the eye, my first name hanging in the air like heavy clouds.
I blinked, thinking of Star, the only family I had, who was to turn nine this year.
"I understand." I said looking at him.
He leaned forward in his chair, setting his rough hands on the table.
"You are very brave, Kyle Reese. I could not have asked for anyone better for the job….You begin training in the morning."
Unable to control it, my mouth formed in to a small smiled and my face brightened.
"Thank you, sir. I will not fail you."
John Conner stood and shook my hand.
"I know you won't" He said, his face happy but his eyes, now clearly visible, contained a sadness buried deep inside them.
He turned walking back to his desk and telling me to come there.
"I have something for you." He said reaching into his small desk.
Out of the drawer, he took out a small folded up picture and closed the drawer gently. He looked at in his hand and stroked the edge of it with his thumb.
"This is very special to me," he said pausing, "but I want you to have it."
He said holding out the folded picture in his hand toward me. I shook my head.
"No, I can't—"
I said not wanting him to give up what he was giving me.
"Please, Reese. I want you to have it." He said his eyes sincere.
I took it in my hand, the thin paper so torn and faded.
I slowly opened it, careful not to rip the fine crease down the middle.
My heart froze.
I stared down at the most…beautiful woman I had ever seen.
Her long blonde hair spilled over the pink bandana which was wrapped around her head like a halo and the bright sun above her made her shine a heavenly glow.
But under all of that, her eyes were the one thing that got me.
They were sad.
She looked as if she was alone in a huge world, although her face would never show it.
What could make her feel that way?
I wanted to help her, tell her everything was going to be alright and that she didn't have to be alone.
But I couldn't, I was years and years away from her.
And I would have to wait.
I promised myself, as I looked at that old picture in front of me, that I would do whatever it took to get back to Sarah Conner. I looked up at John. He smiled at me.
"You are released soldier. You have a long day tomorrow."
I nodded, slipping the picture into my pocket, and began to walk away.
"Reese," I heard John call behind me.
I turned. He paused, a serious look on his face.
"Thank you,"
He said his voice a loud whisper.
I nodded, smiling as I turned to leave.
The door snapped shut behind me.