She's never imagined this moment, to be honest. Not in her life before the veil, those lonely months in the sanatorium, not even when they'd become engaged.
But now...it was all she could think about.
Their intimacy had grown by leaps and bounds since Christmas. They were still chaste and proper, but a little something...more. Like there was a fire burning between them that was lit from there first hello and simmered until their goodbye kiss at her lodgings each evening. Even now, sitting together on the sofa still clad in their wedding outfits, she couldn't quell the nervous anxiety that radiated through her at the thought of what was to come.
"Shelagh, we don't have to do this if you're not ready. I would never want you to feel as though you had to do anything you weren't ready for."
She smiled at her husband, knowing in that moment that she'd made the right decision.
"Patrick- it's because of that, because you would never force me, that I do. I do want to, I just...don't know what to do. I'm terrified of disappointing you, but I...there's so much I don't know."
"It's alright, my love, Whatever you feel comfortable with, that's what we'll do. I- I want...I want this to be a beautiful memory for both of us, not one that you look back on with regret."
"Never regret, Patrick." She squeezed his hand with hers, staring at the golden bands on their interlocked fingers.
"Come here." he opened his arms to her, delighting as she curled into his embrace, fitting herself perfectly into his arms. "We can take things slowly. If you're uncomfortable, tell me and I will stop at once. Okay?"
He felt the nod more than he saw it, her head resting on his chest as he rubbed his hands up her back, his palm flat against the back of her wedding dress. His left hand came to tangle in her hair as he angled her head upwards to kiss her. She responded instantly, her arms fluidly winding around his neck as her fingers gracefully danced into the hair at the nape of his neck. He kissed her chastely at first, only slightly increasing the pressure of his mouth as she massaged his scalp, eliciting a groan from his throat. Pressing his tongue to her lips, she copied his motions, this action still foreign to her.
Only in the past few weeks, since their Christmas Eve wedding had been postponed and their passion for one another continued to rise, had Patrick introduced this new intimacy to his fiancé-now his wife. She pulled away breathless for a moment before leaning towards him again, continuing to kiss him before he began to move his hand slowly from her back to her waist, making his way up to her ribs until his thumb came into contact with the outer edge of her breast. He felt her falter a bit and froze his hand, moving it back down to her waist.
"Alright?"
Shelagh nodded, taking his hand and returning it to where it had been previously before breathing out a 'Yes.', shifting closer to him on the sofa.
Patrick continued his explorations with his other hand, blindly searching for the zipper of her dress, finding it and slowly sliding it downwards, delighting in the sigh his wife emitted as he succeeded in his task. Placing his hand on her back, he marveled in the softness of her skin, like silk, and began to trail his fingers in gentle patterns along her shoulder blades.
Quickly becoming comfortable with their current actions, Shelagh moved her hands from the back of his neck to the front, finding his tie and nimbly undoing the intricate knot Patrick had tied it in for the ceremony. He took that as a good sign, moving a hand down to her knee, slowly moving it upwards towards her thigh.
"Patrick?" Shelagh pulled away.
"Too much?"
"No- that's...erm. I -"
"You can tell me anything..."
"I don't want to go any further."
"Oh." His heart fell momentarily and he hoped it didn't show in her expression. "Alright, my love. We don't-"
"I just- I don't think I'll ever be able to entertain guests in a room where we made love for the first time."
Patrick immediately flushed, realizing that this was a pause, not an end, to the evening.
"Did you want to-"
"Can we go to the bedroom?" she said, overlapping him and silencing his question.
"Of course." He stood from the sofa, offering her his hand before leading her down the hallway.
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Once inside, Shelagh fell into his arms, fingers quickly finding the buttons of his shirt as Patrick unzipped her dress further until it was able to fall to the floor.
She isn't sure exactly how it happens, but the next thing she knows, they are lying on the bed next to one another. She clad only in her slip while only his trousers remain.
"May I touch you?" he whispers, causing her to open her eyes and focus on him.
Biting her lip, she can't tell if she's more nervous or excited by the question.
"Yes...of course you can."
He didn't waste another moment as his hand, which had been firmly planted on her hip, moved up her belly and enveloped her breast through the silky fabric of her slip.
"Oh!" Shelagh arched into his hand, her eyes fluttering closed once more as her lips searched blindly for his mouth.
"Patrick?"
He leaned over her, placing hot kisses from her lips down the column of her neck to her collarbone and chest, stopping just above the line of her slip.
"Please..."
"Shelagh, are you sure? Don't feel like we have to..."
"I know we don't have to- I want to. Please, Patrick...I couldn't be more certain."
Capturing her lips in a searing kiss, he rolls away from her to undo his trousers as she settles closer under the sheets. Haphazardly tossing them aside, he faces her again placing a hand on her hip to pull her closer.
"I love you, Mrs. Turner."
The novelty of her married name was not something Shelagh thought she would ever tire of hearing. Especially coming from her husband. Placing her hands on his chest, she could feel his pounding heart. She leaned closer to capture his lips again.
"I love you too, Patrick. Make love to me."
Languidly, he rolled his wife onto her back, settling himself between her thighs as his hands grasped the edges of her slip and pulled it over her head.
"Shelagh-you're stunning." he breathed out, unable to stop his voice from cracking as he took in the sight of his wife's body for the first time.
She arched her back, trying to draw him closer, eliciting a husky moan from him as he grazed over her center.
"I'll be as gentle as I can, my love. If you need me to stop, tell me."
"I will." she responded as his lips met hers again and he aligned their bodies together, slowly moving forward until they joined as one.
"Oh-Patrick!"
"Alright?"
Unable to form words due to the overload of sensations, she nodded and let out a whimper in response making Patrick freeze.
"I'm not hurting you, am I?"
"No...quite the opposite. Please don't stop."
Needing no more encouragement, Patrick began to move against her slowly at first then quickly picking up his pace as her breath came quickly, panting into his mouth. Without any knowledge of what to do, her body started to respond of it's own accord, her hips meeting him thrust for thrust as her legs came to wrap around him, holding him even more tightly to her.
"Oh, Shelagh. My love..."
"Patrick-I feel so-strange. I-oh- I don't- what's happening"
"It's alright, my love. Just let go. I'm right here."
He picked up speed a bit more as he felt her begin to tighten around him, wanting to make sure of her pleasure before he lost control himself. He hoped it would be fairly soon, for he didn't know how much longer he could hold back. And then suddenly, without warning, her body tensed. Her muscles pulsing around him, and eliciting gasps from his wife, he followed her to his own conclusion.
"Patrick!"
"Oh God, Shelagh!" he groaned, burying his face into her hair and sucking a bruise into her neck.
As their bodies calmed, he rolled back over to his side of the bed, watching her intently. A smile noticeably growing brighter on her face as she turned to him.
"Are you alright, my love? I didn't hurt you, did I?"
Shelagh shook her head. "No, you didn't. I didn't- I never knew it would be like this."
Anxious to hear her thoughts, he reached out and brushed a stray piece of hair from her face, cloaked in a sheen of sweat from their lovemaking.
"Like what, darling?"
Shelagh stared at him, trying to find the words to describe how she felt.
"Like- like I touched heaven."
Hearing her words, he can't help but gather her into his arms, pressing kisses to her face and holding her tightly to his chest as she returned his kisses with passion. Laying her head onto his chest, she can feel his heart thudding beneath her ear as he reaches out to hold her hand. Both of them beginning to succumb to sleep.
"Patrick?"
"Hmm?"
"Is it always going to be like this?" She angled her face upwards to look at him awaiting his response.
He bent down to take her lips once more. "God, I hope so."