The Body For It…
AUTHOR:TheOpportuneMoment
DISCLAIMER: Can't tell ya how much I wish I did own the characters etc. of Lois & Clark:The New Adventures Of Superman, but I don't. Nope. Not even a little, therefore I'm borrowing them. The characters of Daily Planet reporters Evans, Samson and Farlecki are my own guys though... they first cropped up in an unrelated story "Freedom Of The Press", and I liked them so much they're on the paper's staff permanently now!
SUMMARY: The Daily Planet staff attend a very important fancy dress party with a Superhero theme. Some people look good in spandex, some don't!
Part One - Characters and Costumes
"What's that, Chief?"
Perry looked up from his avid polishing at the nosy photographer.
"Did you see a 'Welcome' mat at my door, Jimmy?" Perry growled.
"Err, no Chief." Jimmy was just a little too slow to dodge the punchline.
"That's because you're not welcome!" The editor boomed, his face flushed with embarrassment and rage, "You knock, I decide if I can be bothered answering!"
"Sorry, Chief! Won't happen again I swear! It's just…" Jimmy hesitated, as though weighing up how many hours overtime he was going to have to buy his answer with, "I wanted to know if you've picked a character for the party yet."
Perry glared daggers at the kid. He had moved heaven and earth to get out of going to the costumed ball, but Mr. Franklin Stern was just that. Stern. Every Planet employee would be there on pain of sacking. That's why he was sitting at his desk polishing a big red marble and a collection of steel rods filched from a building site near his home. Perry sat back in his huge leather chair with a huff, gesturing to the items on his desk.
"Take a guess."
Jimmy peered at the odd assortment of bits. "Err, RoboCop?"
"You think I'm about to encase myself in metal?! No, it's the Six-Million Dollar Man. That's the eye, see, and if you'll kindly leave me alone I have a bionic arm to make."
Jimmy bobbed politely and backed out of the office, closing the door firmly behind him.
"Phew!" He exclaimed to Clark, who was on his was past to the copy machine. "Imagine if the Chief really did have super powers! Deadly!"
Clark grinned his agreement. "What about you, Jimmy? Who are you going as?"
"Well, I'm still trying to figure that out. I mean, I'd prefer to be one of my own personal heroes, like Henri Cartier-Bresson, but I don't think that's 'super' enough. Then there's someone obvious like Captain America, but, well, some people have the body for spandex, and some don't. I'm not sure I'm ready to let the public decide. I dunno, Clark. I was thinking of a half-way. Like Neo from The Matrix?"
Clark smiled at Jimmy's worried face and clapped a hand on his shoulder.
"Well, you're certainly the computer whiz. Neo's perfect!"
Jimmy beamed at the approval and hurried off, muttering to himself about a long black trenchcoat.
"Dare I ask?" Clark jumped slightly at Lois' voice so close behind him. He spun round to see that glint of curiosity in her eyes that usually meant she was onto a story she would let go of.
"Ask what?"
"Who you're going to be?"
Clark frowned. Truth be told, he'd been struggling with the idea ever since Perry announced the party three days ago. It annoyed him that he had the perfect costume right there in his closet, and yet Superman was the very last character he could consider going as. People would either believe he really was Superman, and then Clark would be in hot water for not showing up, or else he could admit he was Clark in costume, and the likeness would surely blow his secret out of the water.
"Maybe Batman," he suggested. "I like the cape." That part was true at least.
Lois' eyebrows raised in surprise. "I'd never have thought of you as the tortured-vigilante type. More honest and upstanding, like Superman."
"Oh, come on Lois! You don't think there'll be at least ten other Supermen at the party?"
"You're probably right," she conceded, "But make sure you don't choose one that's covered in fur - trust me I made that mistake myself once, sweated inside a gorilla mask all night and nearly fainted at the buffet table."
"No gorillas, check." Clark affirmed, trying to keep a straight face while the image of Lois as a giant hairy ape paraded through his mind. "What about you, Lois? Maybe Wonder Woman?" He braced himself for the clout that would surely come at him for that suggestion.
To Clark's surprise, Lois only smiled enigmatically. "Wouldn't you like to know?" She strode off through the newsroom, mentally going through her costume details. Unlike most of the staff, she'd decided upon her character almost the moment the party had been announced. No one would ever accuse Lois of being the most willing social-animal, and indeed if there had been any choice she wouldn't be going, but given that it was compulsory, Lois was determined that she was going to abandon the office-girl for an action-chick, and only one female in fiction could possibly live up to her impeccable standards. She was going to blow them all away!
End of Part One