Hey guys :) I'm not new to fanfiction but this is my first Boosh story. Please enjoy, and if you don't like then don't comment please :)
I was watching the film 'Just My Luck' today & got the idea for this story! If you've seen it, then it will be easy to grasp, but if not I'm sure you'll grasp it anyway :)
Disclaimer: As much as I would like to own the Boosh, I don't, therefore credit to Noel & Julian for their fantastic show :) I own nothing but my own imagination. Enjoy! ...
It was rapidly blowing the beautiful black cape which belonged to Vince Noir, and as it billowed behind him, fine embroidered patterns sparkled at the base of the cape. His raven hair made no contrast with the cape, however the rest of his outfit did; shiny gold boots twinned with purple drainpipes and a white t-shirt with a silhouette of Gary Numan embossed on the front, in purple sparkles.
A childish smile played about his face as he strode majestically down the street, the wind making him look like a kind of God. He opened the door of the Nabootique, which swung open so harshly that the familiar bell ring sounded distorted.
"Hey Howard!" He beamed as he forced the door to shut behind him. However Vince didn't need to shout so loud.
Howard Moon, man of action, was already stood up. He wore brown pants (in aggressive chestnut) with an olive green turtle neck jumper covering his torso, with ancient loafers (in haunted muffin) on his feet. He was standing in an impatient pose with an even more impatient look on his face. His Bovril smudge of a moustache was even twitching impatiently.
"C'mon then. Why are you late?" He said, producing a brown flip pad & pencil from stationary village.
Vince simply smirked with the same smile.
"Were you straightening a lion's mane? Sewing sequins to a badger? Hmm?"
"No! Although that is very close!" Vince joked. Howard held the same facial expression, which was nothing like his 'Grief of a Sailor' look.
"I've been planning a party! It's tonight! You coming?" Vince asked.
"A party? Tonight? No Vince, last time we had a party, everyone found out I was a virgin, remember?"
"Oh yeah" Vince recalled in his mind tank, with a giggle.
"It's not funny! Anyway you can't have one, I've re-formed the Jazz Club, and we're meeting here tonight" Howard said.
Vince groaned. "There's no way, Howard. I need the space tonight!"
"You always have the space! Last night you used the whole flat as a catwalk to display your cape collection!"
"Alright, fine...you can have the flat...just have to call everyone, tell them it's off...including the girls..." Vince sighed, with a cheeky glint in his eyes.
Howard was suddenly more alert.
...
Five hours later, the party at the Nabootique was in full swing. It seemed as if the whole electro population of Dalston had turned up. Vince was now in his usual sparkly mirror ball suit; however he was twinning it with his white cowboy hat and white boots. He seemed to be the centre of attention.
He scanned the room, but saw no sign of Howard. Half heartedly leaving the middle of the room, and pushing through his electro posse, he opened the door to their bedroom & saw Howard in a vomit-looking Hawaiian shirt & the same brown pants he wore previously, however he was now wearing his favourite socks & sandals combo.
"Whoa Howard, at least where the Library suit I made you; the jumpsuit style is in for starters. Do you seriously not have any other clothes?"
Howard threw him a look (depression of a baker). Vince held his hands up in a defensive posture.
"Alright, fine! Wear that, it looks...good, honestly...Just, come on, you're missing the party!" Vince smiled as he left the room. Howard forced a small 'woop' and left the room to join the party.
Howard scanned the room to see Vince surrounded by neon ravers and a few of Vince's usual 'mates', which included Leroy, who'd brought along slush puppies from his job at the ice rink. He earned himself a few dodgy looks from a few of the neon lovers nearby, and decided to head back to his room saying to himself that he'd make an appearance later...when most had gone.
Vince was too busy dancing & showing off the 'glory of his outfit' to notice Howards bleak appearance. However he did notice someone else, someone who wasn't Howard, but as dull looking.
This particular figure was sat on the sofa. Vince couldn't mentally comment on his outfit really, as he could only see a cape covering his entire body, which reminded Vince of when he and Howard made up a play about 'Pie.' He wasn't speaking to anybody, nor did he look like one of Camden's regulars. The usual curiosity overtaking him, Vince found himself walking over.
"Excuse me mate, you mind telling me what you're doing here? You on the guest list?"
The hood leant up to look at him, but Vince still didn't see his face.
"No" was all Vince got. Vince hesitated.
"Well...can you get out then, please? Because you're kind of cramping the style in here-"
"I can read your future, pretty lady" The hood cut in.
"Really? I mean, I don't really believe in all that stuff, but-"
"Sit down" The hood cut Vince off again, and beckoned Vince to sit down next to him. He then pulled out some cards from what must have been a pocket. He started dealing them as Vince looked round impatiently; he was missing his party, but he didn't want to feel rude by leaving this person.
The hooded figure laid the cards out & selected the first one, showing it to Vince.
The card displayed a highly detailed drawing of a four leaf clover and a Halifax Bank. Vince gave an almost comical look. The Hooded Figure sighed.
"I know, they modernised them recently. Anyway, this card displays that you are currently very fortunate (Hence the bank). It shows that you have lots of luck due to your popularity, amount of friends, style, trendsetting...you get the idea."
Vince smiled; he knew this already, but he liked it even more when he knew that others knew this. The hooded figure picked up a second card & displayed it.
This one was not in Vince's expectations. The modern Tarot card displayed a horrific motorway pile-up on the M4.
"What does that mean?" Vince asked, with a hint of panic. The hooded being sighed.
"It means that you could be involved in a serious accident...not necessarily on the M4, but it could change your life-"
"This is a nightmare!" Vince cut in "Any way I can stop this?"
The Hood paused, and then spoke silently. "You kiss a close friend, and then the curse may be removed. If the friendship is strong enough, then your friend won't be affected-"
"Listen Mate" Vince cut in "It's nice of you to drop by...but I've got a party to see to, and I don't really believe in all that stuff. Besides, I can't even drive" Vince said, earning a disappointing head-shake from the hood.
"See ya" Vince said, still panicked, as he walked off. The Hooded figure stayed where he was, leaving the cards spread out before him.
...
Vince wouldn't shake off the idea that the cards gave him as the night went on into the early hours of the morning. He'd had a bit to drink now, and was happily dancing away to electro music with his friends.
But it didn't stop him from thinking straight.
Howard emerged at long last, bored of loneliness, wearing his library suit. Vince suddenly had an idea.
"Heeeey, Howard! You made it out of your Jazzzzsh pit!" Vince slurred, walking over to him & hugging him. He didn't know if this was how drunk people acted or not, but it was worth it to stay out of character.
"Don't touch me! Don't ever touch me, not even whilst you're drunk...but...Vince!" Howard complained, as Vince still wouldn't let go. Complaining was useless, and Howard didn't mind really...
"I LOVE you, you know Howard...I really do...gimme a kiss Howard..."
It was worth a try. If Vince was really being this superstitious, then he might as well override the 'spell'. And what better to do it with than with his best friend? Vince leaned up and gave Howard a clumsy kiss on his lips.
Howards frown suddenly turned to laughter...did Vince really just do that? I mean, yeah, he was drunk, but still...no one saw, right?
Wrong. In the corner of the room, the hooded figure appeared to be looking over at the couple. He turned over the third card from the pile. It displayed two shooting stars, swooping across the sky, however they were crossing through each other and then going off in their separate ways. Even though his face was unseen, the figure displayed a creepy smile, and with a small pop, he vanished into thin air.
Vince decided not to tell Howard about the cards...he was scared this would disturb the cancelling of the spell or something. Before Howard could also spoil it by going in for another kiss (which he looked as if he was thinking about in Vince's 'drunken state'), Vince placed his white hat on Howards head.
"Hey Howard...that actually looks really good on you!" Vince said, looking in awe at Howards head. Strange...no hat suits Howard, right? Vince shrugged it off.
Overjoyed at Vince's praise, Howard started to dance even more.
"Hey, check it out, it's Howard! Howard Moon!"
Vince looked round to see Vince's mates, including Leroy, coming over. Vince then expected some sort of mockery to Howard; however, instead he heard compliments about his hat and people actually copying his jazz maverick dancing style. What was going on?
Realising that he was out of the newly formed circle, Vince stepped in to try to understand why people were suddenly acknowledging Howard. Surely they were joking with him...right?
"You know Vince; you look like a right berk in that jumpsuit. Tweeds in now, didn't you know?" Slurred Leroy, earning some agreeing laughs.
Vince was taken aback; he never gets mocked, not even at his own parties!
What in the name of Brian Christ was going on?
...
Dun Dun Duuuuuuuun. Thanks for reading :) Reviews would be gladly appreciated and acknowledged! The more Boosh experienced of you should also be able to pick out the jokes from the telly show (are you ten?) and the live shows :) The story will progress; I have plans and can't wait to write more :) (Btw, I know nothing of tarot cards, so don't flame me for that...haha) Lauren x