'Impressions'
Disclaimer: So who owns GH, definitely NOT me. It belongs to Ono Fuyumi and other respective companies...
This one is written for one of my coolest FF buddies: 'Iloveanimex', it was intended to be written and published on her birthday...but well...I had a long list of things that hindered my story-telling. Though Iloveanimex will tell my lost of problems if you ask her :) She gave me a prompt, Mr Know It All by Kelly Clarkson and I literally performed an autopsy of the song to come up with something really good...So R&R
Iloveanimex, I hope you find this worth your time and interest! :D
"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams." -Dr. Seuss.
Fake...
The first time she ever saw him – Taniyama Mai knew that there was something, something unidentifiable about him that was fake. Maybe it was the polite interest he was showing in her friends, maybe it was the unreachable smile that never touched his eyes or maybe his dark eyes themselves, like pools of secrets, indigo secrets.
Mysterious...
"Four."
Too sudden...
The husky whisper had sucked the soul from her body literally, it had echoed around the audiovisual classroom, eliciting an epic reaction from her and her friends. Screaming like banshees; they had latched onto each other in fear and had shut their eyes to the growing darkness of the room, trying hard not to whimper in pure fear...already begging the bodiless spirit to forgive them for intruding in the supernatural realm.
Fear...instinct...
And then someone switched the light on and brightness flooded the room.
That was when Mai finally allowed her body to go slack with relief, rubbing her shoulders, thanking God that there was no ghost behind the prank and that they hadn't actually evoked the wrath of any spirit. Mai knew that Michiru would be angry at the interference in their ghost story time; she was easily angered when somebody intruded in such a horrific manner and so would be Keiko but what shocked her were the blushes of her friends and their charming smiles as they greeted the person standing by the door.
Why are Keiko and Michiru acting so strangely? Who is the person by the door?
And then Taniyama Mai had turned around, curiously – marking the change in her destiny, from that day on...
There he stood, with a certain pride in his posture – one hand rested on the light switch while the other one was casually in his pocket. He eyed them with curiosity that was instantly replaced by a polite facade and a fake smile...none of her friends noticed the oddity of his appearance, his clothes, not uniform, the way he spoke as if aged with maturity and the way he was quietly nonchalant to their antics.
He said he was Kazuya Shibuya.
Mr-I'm-Adonis-And-We-All-Know-It a.k.a Shibuya moved away from the door, answering her friends' queries and even offered to join them the next time they told ghost stories. Of course, Michiru and Keiko were about to die with astonishment and delight; a handsome guy was joining them!
Honestly! Mai thought, internally shaking her head at her swooning friends. Show some dignity you two! Besides don't you already have boyfriends?
Mai asked him a question or two upon which he threw a dismissive glance and an answer in her direction, this guy was handsome but he wasn't some chivalrous knight...he was just flirting with her friends. Not that her friends were any better, by the way.
He had left her suspicious, mystified and with a mouth open in disgraceful, unladylike curiosity – which Michiru remarked, swooning 'was a natural reaction to his handsome personality'. Mai had then corrected her and told her suspicions to her friends but they had laughed and told Mai to finally think like a girl to which Mai had rolled her eyes and started for her house.
That night when she went to her house, she felt something minutely different in the air, some feeling that clung to her like a scent but she was reminded with Keiko's voice saying that after meeting a handsome guy this reaction was legitimate enough.
Instinct...
So she remained awake a little longer that night; replaying the earlier events idly in her mind but little did she know that just two blocks away, Kazuya Shibuya was doing the same...his rational thoughts more haphazard than he usually allowed.
Narcissist...
The myth flashed in her mind with the word as Kazuya Shibuya smirked...smugly, much too pleased when she had accidentally called him handsome and then blamed it on the school girls.
"Well they have very good taste..."
Say what?!
Mai owlishly stared at her boss, shocked to her roots that a person could be so confident of himself, how could he make such a 'narcissistic' remark?! Didn't he have a spark of modestly or humility in himself? Hadn't he been taught any, pray, any manners at all? What a -
Sure he was really handsome! Sure, he was successful in his business and too smart for his own good but – but she'd never seen a bigger narcissist than him in her life! Slave-driver, cold-hearted jerk and – and a narcissist!
She determinedly stared at him and mentally prepared a name for him; Kazuya Shibuya was too long and too old for a person his age (never mind that he did sound like an old jerk) so she realized that all Kazuya Shibuya, Your Majesty needed was a nickname and Mai knew one. Pointing an accusatory finger at him, mentally, she bestowed him the title.
Naru, the narcissist!
What she didn't know was that the title, this seemingly insignificant nickname would become an endearment for him later...
Amazing...
The thought floated in her head when she saw Naru effortlessly bend the spoon without so much as even gritting his teeth!
Her own shock was delivered by her gasp but she saw Kasai-san stare, astonished at him too and Mai then knew that Naru was amazing, skilled at anything he did and everything he did. He had bent the spoon without even blinking and that caused Mai to stare, mesmerized by his caliber.
Naturally, she was mystified when he asked her to hide this 'little' trick from everyone, especially Lin - Mai had always assumed that Naru, being the narcissist, over-confident jerk he was, would love to flaunt his ability in others' faces but then again...maybe he just didn't want people calling him a freak.
But Mai knew that he was amazing, truly amazing...
She thought that she would die of happiness and shock when he thanked her for keeping this a secret, bursting with delight, she tried to hide her blush hoping that he wouldn't notice her admiration for him, that he wouldn't notice the regard in which she held him; highly.
From that day onwards, Mai was proud of knowing him, proud of being his assistant and proud of him for some unknown reason that made her feel defensive for him, more than anyone. There was no man who could work with the quite dedication her boss showed and she knew that his skill and his genius was what made him so respected by his peers.
All that Mai knew was that Naru had amazed her once more...
Caring...
It was one thing seeing the Naru in her dreams being nice to her – but Naru in reality being kind to her was a wholly different concept and if asked which dimension she liked better; Mai would always choose reality because dreams were illusions, more sweeter but somehow they didn't affect her in that way, nor did they make any etching upon her but the real Naru, he...
"Are you feeling better?"
This Naru was a new aspect, kind for this rare moment and Mai felt a ball of energy strike against her body as she smiled and sat down beside him, unaffected by the fact that they were in a sewer, she locked her eyes on him. He had smiled a bit like Dream Naru but this smile was different somehow, special somehow because she knew that this Naru only smiled for certain people and being added in that list made her feel special, made her feel suddenly better.
"Hey, do you want to meet my pet?"
He has a pet? Down in this sewer?!
How exactly, had they gotten here? A most usual story – Mai had ran off with her philanthropic instincts on the loose which earned her and Naru a free ride downwards into the sewer and so now they were trapped. At first Naru had been most uncomforting, subtly insulting her and then telling her that the hexer had finally chosen her to kill too.
She had shuddered. Most horrific and uncomforting.
And here Michiru and Keiko thought that he was some kind of Knight in shiny armour. Pft.
Suddenly, a coin appeared between his fingers and Mai felt like laughing in incredulity, was this Naru's so-called 'pet'? Hilarious!
"Is that your pet?" Mai asked, leaning to examine the coin. "Its just a piddly little 500 yen!"
Almost as suddenly as before, the coin disappeared and Naru smirked smugly.
"You see," He looked at her. "It hid because you made fun of it."
No way!
"No!" She elongated the word and pointed an accusatory finger at him. "You've just got it in your hand!"
"Really?" Naru held up his palms and showed her that there was no coin in his hands. Instead, he reached for beneath his elbow and extracted the coin from there. "Ah, there you are..."
Woah!
"How did you do that!?" Mai was amazed, her fear thrown in some niche in the back of her mind. "Naru let me see it!"
"Catch..."
She spread her palms open, struggling to catch the coin that Naru had tossed in the air but neither could she catch it nor did she see it floating in the air. Naru...how...could...he...
"Hey!" She puffed out her cheeks, indignantly and pointed an accusatory finger at him. "You didn't even throw it!"
"I guess your yelling scared him so much, he had to hide."
Her yelling? What the -
"Naru I did not yell!"
Rarely was Naru so gentle or so carefree with people and Mai felt as though she had seen him from another perspective, as if someone had taken a portrait of the big-headed jerk and rotated it so that she could see him in a different light. Who knew that Naru could be friendly to anybody at all, her mind consisted of half formed, distracted thought but a vague notion swam around and around, questioning her...
It seems like I don't know Naru at all, I don't know who he really is...
All Mai knew that Naru was a skilled magician...and he had pulled her all the way in. Literally.
Self-centered jerk!
How dare he use an insured camera of all things as an excuse to get free labour out of her!
"Did you just hire me so that you could get some free labour. Promise you'll tell the truth."
She hadn't thought him to be that a villain before that but now, Mai had herself convinced – this man was no good, he slowly walked towards her, casually and then placed a hand on her shoulder maintaining eye contact with her.
"You're getting smarter and smarter everyday..."
WHAT!?
HOW COULD THAT SELF-CENTERED NARCISSIST EMPLOY HER OUT OF NOTHING BUT TO BE JUST SLAVE-DRIVEN!
"HEY COME BACK HERE NARU! ANSWER ME JERKFACE!"
Monk held her arms, restraining her from scratching Naru's face out with her fingernails but she could just scream at him until he disappeared down the hallway, away from her questioning yells.
It was official...
She hated him. And she hated the fact that she could not hate him for much too long.
Fearless...
He had said it was nothing when she thanked him but Mai knew bravery when she saw it and what Naru had done last night was fearless, if a bit reckless too.
Taking a ceiling on his back, he had made sure that she wouldn't get hurt even if he himself got injured in the process. She admired him for that and if possible her blush grew in size and color as she stood before Naru - fumbling with her words.
"Uh..yeah..what I'm trying to say is that..."
"Mai, speak clearly."
"Hmm...yes so I came here to – uh – you know...just..."
"Thank me?" He looked up at her from the various papers he held, an eyebrow raised in question.
Geez...does he read minds or what?
"Yeah, thanks for saving me last night. I might've been dead if not for you, I guess."
"I know." He returned his gaze to the file papers. "If I say so myself, I have grown accustomed of taking you out of constant trouble."
Why, the nerve!
"Yeah thanks for saving me," She scoffed, her mood spoilt already. "Since I'm a burden on you and all."
Mai turned to leave, the tea already set on his desk and wondering how she could've come to work for such an icy person (or how she could've fallen for him too). However, his next words stopped her.
"And oh Mai," His strong voice forced her to turn on her shoulder to face him. "It's amusing to see your stupid expression when you're in danger."
WHAT THE HELL DID HE MEAN! THAT INSUFFERABLE KING JERK OF GRUMPIES!
Maybe that would explain why he was always the first one to rescue her out of danger...
That Know-It-All...
Murderer...
There was an unspoken tension in the air as she said the word that had echoed in her head.
Naru wasn't a murderer, she knew it! Her tears slid down continuously as she looked at her hands, wishing for something to stop Naru form reversing the zuzhou curse. He was killing innocent people here, he was entitling himself to a murderer – didn't he see that?!
"Take her away. No one disturbs Lin..."
There was a look flashing in his eyes, she identified it as hatred and revulsion but she wanted to stop him from hating her; she didn't want Naru to hate her! Never...but he was doing the wrong thing! He was a murderer!
She then let herself be dragged away by Takigawa, off to the ground where the students were having an assembly.
Mai's tears had reddened her eyes but she could care less – of all things Naru had ever done, this was the worst of all, these students didn't know what they were doing was wrong, they were not accustomed to this world of supernaturals, they didn't know and he couldn't blame them for not knowing...no school teaches such things but then why was Naru making such an antagonizing move?
But the Naru she knew...
Her thoughts immediately flew to the students who didn't even know of their deaths which was about to come in a minute or two...a sniffle escaped her and she looked up to see the sad faces of the rest of the team.
The students were going to die and she could do nothing about it...
A minute or two passed and Mai held her breath, her eyes closed; not wanting to see the innocent people reaching a painful death just because of one playful mistake.
Then five minutes passed...
And fifteen minutes...
Half an hour...
"Hey Mai!" Monk was dragging her to the assmebly room and she braced herself for the worst but to her surprise, all she could see were...hitogatas...wooden hitogatas.
Naru had saved them...
Mai realized at that moment that she could never really decipher Naru but he wasn't a murderer...
The Naru she knew wasn't a murderer, the Naru she knew had restored her trust again.
Headstrong...
A strange static surrounded the air around them, charged – full of pulsating energy.
"N-Naru..."
Her whisper barely affected him, he glowed still brighter, his hands in a peculiar positions as a ball of what seemed like energy accumulated into the palm of his hand. What was he doing?
"Naru! No!"
Lin's shout seemed to fall deaf upon his ears – he wasn't listening to anyone, he was being rash, irrational and though Mai didn't know the harm in the situation, she could sense that something was deadly wrong.
What the -
The air around her cracked and when she tried to get closer to Naru, he seemed to repel her, like their was a barrier between them that kept her out.
He didn't even look back at her and instead the next thing Mai witnessed, effectively shut off her systems.
Naru made another strange motion with this hands and then he aimed...
It hit...
And it was destroyed...the air felt cleaner and the surroundings lighter, they had finally solved the case...they had put everything together.
All because of Naru...
Mai was heping the others move from inside the cave and couldn't help but feel that Naru was dawdling quite unusually so she turned around, intending to use the dialogue 'quit dawdling' upon him but her voice shrivelled in her throat.
Naru looked dazed, as if vague of everything around him.
And then he went unconscious.
"NARU!"
Suddenly, shouts filled the air and everyone was racing towards Naru. Mai felt as if someone had electrocuted her soul, she was numb, processing only certain sounds like Lin's attempts to revive Naru or her own heartbeat filling every corner of her brain.
What if he did that because...I said...
"Someone call the ambulance, he's got a pulse but its very weak!"
"Naru wake up, dammit you brat!"
The paramedics soon arrived and drove Naru to the nearest hospital but they could't assure Mai for the bruneete just clutched her chest, tears flowing down her cheek as guilt broke out in heavy sobs.
If Naru died, it would be because of her!
No Naru couldn't die! He – He had to live because Mai had to apologize to him...and she couldn't let him die without that could she?!
Could she?!
No doubt he was head-strong...no doubt that she had ignited a flame far from taming inside his heart.
Insecure...
"Me or Gene?"
The question had startled her...what was that supposed to even mean!?
She had confessed to Naru, hadn't she!? She liked Naru...then why was the narcissist not making any reaction, any reaction except this...except tossing her feelings back at her, questioning her like the Know-It-All he was?! This didn't make any sense, nothing made sense except the fact that he was so cold to everything right now...as if trying to shut her out, as if trying to make her accept that she loved his twin (that's necrophilia!) and not him.
His expression was cold, distant...his mouth quirked into an understanding yet sad smile.
"Girls would confess to me often, mistaking me for Gene."
"That would have been tiresome."
Was Naru insecure?
It didn't seem likely but it was true, he felt overshadowed by his somehow better twin and he had somehow accepted himself as a replica, as a substitution. Her heart thumped loudly and then ached, his previous words crashing against her as if she tried to make some sense some deduction out of all his attitude.
He was looking at her closely as if waiting for some answer but Mai couldn't figure out what to say, how to say and she knew that Naru's emotions were raw at the moment and she had to abstain from doing something that might hurt him
She found none, except the fact that he was 'insecure'.
Her heart went out to him; it must be really tiresome to be mistaken as another person, wouldn't it be really exhausting to be always compared to someone who's always been thought better, wouldn't it be a heartache to love the person and not hate him, not blame him for the substitution. The tears made their way down her cheek and she restrained the urge to embrace him, to let him know that she understood, perfectly.
Her own dilemma was that she loved Naru, not Gene.
But Naru didn't love her back...
"You're going back to England?"
Say no! Please say no! Please, I'm sorry Naru – just say no!
"Yes."
No...
"We'll miss you..."
All her world felt like crumbling at her feet, she had been wishing for this moment, she didn't expect Naru to reciprocate but she didn't expect him to backfire her statement in that way. Her heart settled in her gut and for a moment she rested her head against the trunk of the tree, closing her eyes, wishing that Naru wouldn't turn and see her.
"It's unnecessary Mai," He stopped in his tracks, his hands stuffed into his pockets. "Thank you for all your hard work."
Not now. She wouldn't cry now...not now.
He kept on walking towards the cabin, never once looking back, leaving an imprint on her heart.
A deep impression...
Would she ever see him again?
More importantly – could she ever fall in love again?
And the answer came to her as she watched his retreating form, a slow breeze rustling the air, autumn leaves cracking under his feet with a crunching sound.
She didn't need him to say it...
If you love someone dearly, you can fall in love with their shadows, their memories, their distant voices...
If you love somebody dearly, you can even fall in love alone...
"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it." - Rumi.
A/N: Ah, there's a part two too! I have to give Mai and Naru a happy ending so do look out for it too, 'k? There's a reason for such OOCness that you will find in part two, a very valid one at that ;)
I hope you all enjoyed reading, leave a comment!
-borntoflyhigh-