Goodbye Love

Summery: After a funeral of one of their own, the rest of the team feel they can't carry on. Flack feels he's to blame, Angell feels she can't live in NY any longer and Lindsay can't understand why everyone won't just get along. Loosely based on Rent. *Warning* Character Death

Disclaimer: I do not own CSI NY or the song Goodbye Love from the musical Rent

A/N: This is loosely based on the song and moment from the musical Rent. I got the idea from the mini song fic I did in Shuffle Beat. I know there is character death and as much as I appose it, it was the only way to create a full story line. Now all I can say is I didn't kill this person off because I don't like them but because in order to create the correct emotions that would mirrored the ones from the actual musical it was necessary – so sorry to all. You may want to listen to the song or read a synopsis of the musical if you don't already know it just you might get a little bit of a better idea of how the story goes if you do. I've tried to make it so that that is no necessary but just incase XP

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They all walk out of the church; everyone intending on go their separate ways. Their solemn face bore tears of sadness and despair, their vision blocked by a blur of facts and truth. No one could look at each other; the memories of him were still fresh in their minds and no one wanted to loose them. Everyone held a burden inside them. Everyone blamed someone else for his death, but it was none of their faults. No one would have seen it coming on that dark night. No one could have anticipated the call. No one would have expected it to happen. No one would have expected it to go so wrong. But if there was any way that he would have wanted to go out, it was through doing his job and in side they all respected that.

The cool crisp air blew through their thick over coats as the November winds came tumbling down upon New York City. Dried leaves crunched under their feet and the bare trees shivered along with them. The church yard was empty and the bells knelled to the sound of crows crying along with them in the distance. The service was short and empty, both of people and emotion, as they each stood on the stand to say their last good byes. A good bye to someone they loved.

Flack walked hand in hand with Devon as they made their way down the winding path. Everyone was quiet and content from the service but he felt his temper being to boil inside of him. The thought that he was the reason his best friend had died took over all sense of thinking, the guilt that it was his best friend lying there in the coffin and not him, the aching sadness knowing he'd left a friend with no lover. But that wasn't all that ran through his mind. As guilt and rage battled it out, he remembered hearing rumors in the bullpen about Angell but he didn't know if it was true. Letting go of Devon's hand he took an extra step in front of her towards Angell.

'I heard you're leaving,' he spoke out towards her. 'You quit your job and you're leaving New York.'

Angell turned to face Flack and let loose of Adam's arm that was slung around hers comfortingly as he walked her to the car park before her long journey home. Her eyes burning bright in the dull, grayness of the church yard hearing him speak. Was it angry or jealously towards Flack or pure sadness towards the death of her friend? 'Yeah, I'm heading back home to live with my parents. I'm getting out of New York.'

Angell watched as Devon came up behind Flack and linked her arm with his. Her green eyes flicker with passion and lust as she clinged onto him. 'Is it true you're with her now?' Angell spat out her words and aiming them directly at Devon. How could he have dumped her for that little piece of trash? She wasn't going to get over the heart ach he'd brought to her. That and all that had happened recently pushed everyone over the edge; pushed him so far off the edge that he went running back to her. She had made the decision that she wouldn't be able to work with him any more – not if this is what they'd turned into.

'You said you weren't going to talk to her again?' Devon whispered into Flack's ear cunningly teasing Angell as she spoke.

'Not now,' he said through his teeth, as he shrugging her off his shoulder. She retreated but only far enough to still be lingering at him.

From behind the group Stella stepped in and turned to Devon, 'Who said you have any say he would he says things to! This isn't about you! Our friend has just died; our colleague. Someone you don't even know.'

Walking up to Stella with arms crossed, folded over each other tightly, Mac spoke. 'Who said you should care about everyone else's business-'

'Who said I was talking to you!' she spat back at him, lashing out and shoving him further away from her.

'Oh just stop it, okay. This isn't about you,' Mac said as Stella took several steps back away from away from him to stop herself to pushing him further. 'You always need to have your own say. Even when we were together it was always about you. You had to make sure everyone heard what you were saying. You never cared for our relationship.'

'Guy, calm down,' trying to intervene, Adam took a step forward but purely in vain as Angell lashed out at Flack.

'You were the same. Not caring about anyone else; trying to be the tough leader that had to run everything. You never cared for me. It was always about work to you!' taking two steps forward Angell shoving Flack back.

Trying to contain the fighting Adam stepped in shouting, 'please, stop', but it was simple failed attempted as Mac and Stella began their own argument.

'You think it's my fault. You would always cower away in your work; you never paid attention to me. When ever I asked for it you brushed me off. You never listen to me. I tried to let you have your space but it made me feel like you never cared,' Stella shouted at Mac.

'It was always bout work. You'd come home not caring about me. You just glad there was someone there to clean up after you. You never really wanted me around. I was just something that happened to be there, so you made use to me. I am not that kind of person. I can never be that kind of person. I don't know who you want me to be and if I can't be myself there is no need for me being around anyway.' Angell said at Flack.

'Fine then leave,' Flack shouted back at her.

Stepped in before anyone could get hurt Adam tried to break up the fight, 'Come on guys chill!'

'I would have been happy to die for what Danny and Lindsay had. That little bit of love that got them through. Look at you! You're pathetic!' Stella yelled at Mac.

'I just wanted someone who unafraid to take that step. Who was just happy saying I love you,' Angell took a step forward and gave one last shove at Flack pushing him back.

Loosing his grip with her, Flack answered, 'Fine leave then. We don't need you. You won't be missed and sure not by me. You might have thought I loved you but I never did.'

Suddenly the whole yard when silent, 'Stop it!' Lindsay shouted. 'You said you'd all be cool today! You said you weren't going to let any of this get to you. So, please for my sake!' Wiping a tear away she pulled her jacket tighter to her, 'I can't believe he's gone,' she whispered softly to herself. The rest of them went quiet. Embarrassed they looked down, trying to conceal their emotions. 'I can't believe you're going,' Lindsay looked up at Angell. She'd always been there for each other; Angell helped Lindsay through anything and everything but now all she could feel was lost and abandoned watching her friends argue. 'I can't believe we're being torn apart. Danny would have hated this. He hated us fighting like this. He was always the one who brought us together and made us smile and made us happy. Why can't you all see that? Why does this have to be goodbye?'

Everyone stood still, contemplating their actions, reflecting on the truthful, heart spoke speech Lindsay just gave. Had they been to rash on each other?

Mac and Stella stood staring at the ground, uncertain, unsure. They still loved each other. They knew deep inside after all these years they would still be there for each other. After all the trouble and heartache they would still remain friends even if there was a spark inside of them that said they should be more. Watching Lindsay cry and break down was a moment of realization that told them, there would be nothing to keep them apart for long enough.

'Mac?' Stella said softly, her voice echoing in the empty yard. Mac lifted his head only to catch Stella's eyes where they locked, connected. 'I'm sorry,' she continued before running straight into his open arms. They would always be right for each other even if he paid little attention to her, even if she could be too attention seeking, they both knew they would see be together in the end.

Angell watched the couple unbearably. It would never be that easy for her. Walking up to Lindsay, Angell enveloped her in a last hug, 'I'm sorry,' she said softly, letting go of Lindsay, 'I'll come back, okay? I'll come back just for you.' Wiping away, her own tears Angell gave one good look at the rest of the team before dashing off. Running out of the yard she retreated to her car, everything was packed and ready to go. Leaving was hard, there was no doubting that, leaving at her friend's funeral was worst but she couldn't stay – not since everything changed.

Devon stepped closer to Flack, linking her arm with his. Wrapping his arm around her shoulder he turned to Lindsay, 'I'm sorry, Linds, for everything. He wouldn't have wanted us to fight like this.' Giving her a nod, he and Devon separated from the team, going their own way.

Alone in the park were Adam and Lindsay. Walking up to her Adam wrapped an arm around her shoulders comfortingly. 'Everything will be fine, alright?' he reassured her. 'There's just you and me now. This isn't goodbye. They'll all come back.'

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A/N: *sigh* At long last this is done. I know it's a one shot but it was harder than you think to write, especially since I wanted to stay true to the actual Rent story line. Sorry, I may have written people more that slightly out of character but I was trying my best to say true to the song XP For anyone who is interested, and knows them, this is the character list: Mark: Adam, Rodger: Angell, Mimi: Flack, Benny: Devon, Maureen: Stella, Joanne: Mac, Collins: Lindsay, Angel: Danny. I know some of the genders have been swapped but all I can say it was necessary. Oh, and as much as I hate Devon I needed another character so without creating a new one she was the only one that fitted. I urge you, if you have no seen it, to watch Rent. Either the movie or the actual theater production, it's a brilliant, thrilling, sad story that mirrors reality. I also strongly urge you to tell me what you thought. It was a random piece but it was a different piece of writing for me. So, yeah, review!