ZephyrSamba here!  Didja know, yesterday was my ff.net one-year anniversary?  How time's fun when you're having flies!  Or something like that.  Anyhoo, in honor of that I was going to do a 'Peach Creek through the years' story, with a bunch of little 'clips' of the gang in action at a certain someone's birthday party every year…but!  Well, suddenly my first 'clip' had blown itself into a full 2-chapter story of its own…so, well…maybe someday I'll go back to my original idea, but for now, I hope you like!

Oh, and I thought I'd mention this, since I've seen questions about it in other people's reviews: where I use Double-D's 'given' name, I spell it 'Edward' – after all, that's how his parents write it on all those sticky-notes, and I'd be sad to think they didn't even know that much about their kid!  I realize it was spelled 'Eddward' on his nametag in that driving-school episode, but I figure that's either 'coz Eddy wrote it (when have any of Eddy's signs been spelled correctly?), or because the whole situation was making Edd nervous (imagine that!) to the point of misspelling his own name.  No, I really don't have anything better to think about…Hrm…

~Zeph

*****

"Cool duds, huh?  They used to be my brother's!"  A six-year old Eddy smugly readjusted the lapels of his oversized purple leisure suit, thoroughly enjoying the attention from his audience of one.  "They're a little big on me now, but I ain't worried – my brother started really growin' when he turned ten, and Mom says I'm already taller than he was at my age!"  He hitched up his pants once more.  "Yeah, I figure in a few years I'll be lookin' down on everyone…"

Jonny whistled appreciatively.  "Boy, Eddy, you look like a million bucks!"  Suddenly he looked down at his own clothes, plucking uncomfortably at his drab t-shirt, on which he'd scrawled 'Happy Birthday, Plank!' in bright blue letters.  "Um…I'd better go make sure we've got enough ice cream…I'll be right back!"  Eddy smirked as Jonny wove his way through the crowded living room and pushed past the beaded curtain that led into his kitchen.

"Eddy, look!"  Ed proudly galloped up to Eddy bearing an armful of gaily-wrapped presents.  "I got the present, just like you said!"  A lock of red hair fell into his face as he came to an abrupt stop.  Ed looked at it cross-eyed, and laughed as he blew it out of his eyes.  "Make room for meatballs!"

"Hey!"  Kevin strode after Ed, his fists clenched and eyes narrowed.  "Those aren't yours!  Put 'em down, you – "  here he paused and glared at both Eds, apparently at a loss for words.  "You…uh…"  Growling in frustration, he gritted his teeth and stomped away.  "Aw, forget it, you two aren't worth it…"

"Keep trying, Kev – you almost got us good that time!"  Eddy snickered after him.  His expression changed to one of annoyance as he turned back to Ed.  "And drop the loot, Monobrow, you were supposed to go buy a present, not grab everyone else's!"  He snorted.  "Man, our first party, and you're already messing – "  He cut off abruptly at the sound of a girlish giggle nearby.  Grabbing Ed, he made his way closer so he could listen in on Nazz's conversation.

"What a cool idea for a gift, that's really sweet!"  Nazz wore a patient expression as she talked to a slightly-built boy who stared more at his feet than at her.

"Th-thank – "  The speaker never got the chance to finish, as Eddy jumped in and threw an arm around him.

"Of course it's sweet, it was all my idea!  I just let – uh – my buddy here go pick it up so he'd feel like he was helping and all."  He grinned indulgently as he snatched the present from its original owner.  "It's all about makin' people feel appreciated, ya know!"

Nazz looked at Eddy, taking in his impossibly purple leisure suit jacket, the large gold medallions, and the hemmed-up bellbottoms.  "Um…that's great.  Heh, yeah."  She glanced around, her eyes alighting on Kevin.  "Oh, I think Kevin's calling me, I'll, um, talk to you guys later…"  With a polite smile, she quickly made her way to the other side of the room.

Eddy grinned confidently as he watched Nazz depart.  "Didja see that, Ed?  She could hardly keep her hands offa me!" 

Ed lifted his hair out of his eyes and looked around.  "It was the feel-good movie of the summer, Eddy!"

"Um, excuse me, but could you please unhand me now?"

"Huh?"  Eddy glanced at the boy he'd taken the present from, eyeing with disdain his large yellow bowtie, his black knit hat, his pristine white shirt so vigorously ironed that it seemed wrong to even utter the word 'wrinkle' in its presence.  "Yeah, sure, okay."  As he released him, he looked down at the present.  "So what's this 'sweet' thing we brought, anyway?"

"'We'?"  The newcomer frowned uncertainly.  "Forgive me if I seem impolite, but I don't even know y– "

"Yeah, yeah," Eddy silenced the boy with an irritated wave of his hand.  "I'm Eddy, this is Ed, and you're that quiet kid that's always going around takin' notes and trying to clean the swings at the playground."  He rolled his eyes.  "Nice to meet you…I guess…"

Eddy's newfound 'buddy' wrung his fingers uneasily as he glanced between Eddy and the nearby front door.  After several moments of indecisive silence, he shut his eyes as if steeling himself.  "Well, Mother did indicate that I was to attempt to establish some sort of positive interpersonal relationship here today," he sighed.  With a shaky smile, he opened his eyes and extended a hand towards Eddy.  "It's a pleasure to meet you, Eddy – a-and you, too, Ed."  He nodded at Ed.  "My name is Edward, but you can – "

"All right already, we didn't ask for your life's history!"  Ignoring Edward's startled expression, Eddy shook the present in his face.  "Just tell me what we brought, will ya?"

"Um, well, I brought a remote-operated, fully-working model of one of the local varieties of dragonfly, built to a scale of – "

"Hang on."  Eddy held the package out at arm's length.  "I just told Nazz I was bringing a bug?"

"Bugs!"  Ed excitedly grabbed Edward.  "He likes bugs, Eddy – maybe he can help me catch that giant lava-powered mosquito-man I always wanted!"  He hugged him tightly.  "Please can we keep him?  Huh?  Huh?  Oh, please?"  In his arms, a highly distressed Edward struggled to breathe.

"No way, Ed, we don't need – "  Eddy stopped as Ed's eyes filled with tears.  Slapping a hand to his forehead and heaving an exasperated sigh, he growled, "All right, fine, he can hang around with us – for now."  He glared at Edward as he added, "But don't get too comfortable – you make me look bad, and you're on your own again, got it?"

"Got it," Edward squeaked, too focused on drawing a breath to elaborate.  When Ed dropped him and began dancing circles around both him and Eddy, Edward gratefully sucked in air until his face had returned to its normal, non-blue color.  "D-does he do that often?"

Eddy shrugged disinterestedly.  "Only when he's not doin' anything even stupider."  He picked at the edges of Edward's carefully-wrapped present, absently tearing away little bits of paper.

Edward giggled at Eddy's comment, but trailed off uncomfortably as he noticed Eddy's sour expression.  He glanced at his present, still in Eddy's hands, then looked to Ed.  The larger boy paid him no mind, instead flapping his arms and buzzing around in apparent imitation of the elusive lava-powered mosquito-man.  Coughing awkwardly, Edward turned back to Eddy.  "So, um, h-how well do you know the guest of honor?"

"Who, Plank?"  Eddy snorted.  "It's just a piece of wood, how well do you think I – " he raised an eyebrow at Edward's surprised look.  "Don't tell me you didn't know what Plank is?"

Edward blushed and dropped his eyes.  "Well, no, not really…I-I tend to, um…e-enjoy…spending the majority of my time on my own, you see…I think th-that's why Mother was so insistent that I attend this particular get-together…"  Quickly, as if trying to change the subject, he added, "I had assumed Plank was the nickname of the child who had invited me – Jonny, I believe he goes by?" 

"You thought Jonny and Plank were the same?"  Eddy barked a laugh.  "Man, you don't know the half of it!"  He casually stuck his foot out and tripped Ed as he flapped past.  "Hey, Mop-head, tell Bug-boy here who Plank is!"

Ed jumped to his feet, saluting with one elbow held as he brushed his hair out of his eyes yet again.  "Plank is the man with the plan!"  He fondly ruffled Eddy's hair.  "Isn't he a cute little bugger?"

"Ed, that's me." Eddy waved Ed's hand away with a peevish swat.  "I said tell him who Plank is!"

"Oh yeah."  Ed tapped his head in thought.  "Plank is the one who comes home every night at dinner and brings me used Styrofoam cups and paperclips when I am good!"

Eddy darted an embarrassed glance at Edward.  "That's your dad, pudding-brain," he hissed at Ed.  "Now get it right!"

"Plank is that funny little fellow over there with the sock on his head who looks like he needs a soothing hot cup of oatmeal to calm those frazzled nerves?"

"Um, I-I believe he's referring to me, now…" Edward offered, self-consciously readjusting his hat and trying to look less tense.

"I know he's talkin' about – " Throwing up his hands in frustration, Eddy said, "Look, just forget it, you'll see Plank when – "

"Oh!  I got it, Eddy!"  Ed suddenly leapt onto Eddy's shoulders, perching precariously for a moment before Eddy crumpled beneath him.  "Plank is Jonny's happy little friend with a heart of pure wood!"  He hugged himself as he added, "Just like Lassie, only not!"

"Ed!"  Knocking Ed aside, Eddy jumped to his feet.  "Watch it, will ya, you'll wreck my duds!"  After carefully readjusting his lapels and untangling his various gold medallions, he returned his attention to Edward.  "Anyway, Monobrow's right – " glaring back at Ed, he added, "finally…"

Edward frowned in puzzlement.  "I'm afraid I'm not following you, is this 'Plank' fellow some sort of canine companion?"

Eddy scratched his head.  "Uh…you mean a dog, right?"  He moved on as Edward nodded.  "Nah, Plank ain't a dog, it's even better than that!"  Edward hesitantly returned his grin, uncertain of the joke but pleased at the friendly gesture.  "Get this – Plank's…a piece of wood!"  Falling back against Ed, Eddy held his stomach with laughter.  "Jonny takes him everywhere, talks to him nonstop – what a rube!"

"What a sack of potatoes!"  Ed agreed laughingly.

The laughter continued, but Edward seemed oblivious to its cause.  "Ah, so this 'Plank' fellow is Jonny's inanimate surrogate companion!  How intriguing!"  For the first time that day, a spark of enthusiasm moved him to forget his self-conscious discomfort as he eagerly pulled out a pen and notebook.  "I suppose it's only natural for one of a certain age to possess an imaginary friend, but to have manifested this being in the form of some sort of wooden object, and to have progressed with it – him?  Her? – beyond the early developmental years, why, that's something truly worthy of investigation!"  He jotted down some notes and asked, "Now tell me, if you would – when was the first time either of you observed Jonny to be associating with Plank?"

Still writing, it took several moments before Edward noticed the silence with which his question was met.  "Um, gentlemen?"  He glanced up to find Ed and Eddy staring at him in blank amazement, and hastily reached up to check his hat.  Finding it on properly, he moved his hands down to cover his mouth.  "I-It's my teeth, isn't it?  I have something in my teeth?  Please excuse me!"  He scurried over to a nearby table, snatched up a toothpick perched in front of a festively decorated birthday cake, and vigorously worked it between his teeth.

"Plank!!!"  Suddenly Jonny dashed over and grabbed Edward by the wrist.  "You give him back, you – you – " Unable to come up with anything awful enough to describe someone who would pick their teeth with his best friend, Jonny snatched the toothpick away and carefully wiped it off on a napkin.  "Are you okay, buddy?  Speak to me!"

Eddy and Ed came over to watch the fun, just as the other kids circled around. 

"Oh, smooth move, you slobbered all over the birthday boy!"  Kevin smirked wickedly, clearly enjoying Edward's discomfiture. 

"Look what he did to Plank!"  Jonny held up the flat wooden toothpick, upon which could be seen a very tiny smiling face.  Forlornly poking a fingernail into the newly-formed notch at the top of Plank's 'head,' he cried, "He'll never be the same!"

"You hurt Plank?"  Nazz looked reproachfully at Edward.  "And here I thought you were so sweet!"

Finding himself the center of attention, Edward shrank back timidly, wide-eyed and red-faced.  "But I, I-I didn't mean to – "  He edged closer to Eddy and Ed with a pleading look.  "I didn't even realize – "

Seeing Edward move to join Ed and Eddy, Kevin snorted.  "Man, it figures he'd be hanging out with those two – " he paused.  "Uh, those two…"  Screwing up his face in concentration, he continued, "those two…not-cool…kids…"  His frustration was evident for only a second, before a new idea entered his mind.  He grinned and cracked his knuckles.  "Let's make 'em all pay!"

"Pay?  But I don't – " Edward gave a surprised yelp as Ed grabbed him and Eddy by the back of their shirts.

"Exit, stage lavender!"  With a burst of speed, Ed ran through the door, looking back with an appreciative chuckle at the Ed-shaped hole he'd left.  "Look, Eddy, it looks just like me when I am not there!"

"You're never all there, Ed!"  Eddy bounced along as Ed dragged him farther away from their pursuers.  "Just step on it, will ya?  And watch the duds, if you tear this jacket my brother'll kill us!"

"Ask and you shall retrieve!"  Ed galloped out of sight, trailing Eddy and a very alarmed Edward behind him.