Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters they belong to Matt Groening and I don't make any money from this
"Class, next week you're going to have a substitute teacher. He may not be the most experienced but we needed a teacher fast so... you're stuck with him," said Mrs Krabapple while taking a big puff on her cigarette, "or he's stuck with you" she added under her breath.
"Hey Bart" said a husky voice from behind Bart Simpson, "What do you think about having a substitute?" Bart turned around to see a boy his age with big blue eyebrows wearing a purple shirt and red shoes. "Oh hey Milhouse, I dunno, I guess he couldn't be as bad as Krabapple" Bart said to his best friend.
"But remember how Mrs K said that he isn't the most experienced, we trick him heaps and he won't know any better" Milhouse replied
"Oh yeah" Bart said "Whoa mama, I just thought of all the ways we can torture that kook substitute next week"
"We can go out to recess earlier, or push the dates of test forward" Milhouse said excitedly, "You gotta dream bigger," Bart said putting his arm around Milhouse "I'm talking super glue on his chair, turning the classroom upside down and best of all, I'll pretend to go to the nurse and then pull on of my legendary prank calls. Hey do you wanna come over and help me think of ideas,"
"Sorry Bart as much fun as that sounds I can't, my dad is making me help him lay out the avocado dip for his 'divorce help' club, it's basically where a bunch of divorced men come together and cry, my dad gets really depressed after and spends all night crying 'Oh Luanne why did you leave me' and then well he needs a shoulder to cry on, and unfortunately that shoulder is attached to me" Milhouse explained. Bart shuddered "don't worry, no one, and I mean NO ONE is as bad as my dad... and speaking of the devil" Bart said as he saw homer clumsily running up to the school saying "Bart, Bart, guess what," Bart rolled his eyes and said "Homer I thought we agreed that you stay away from school so that none of the cool kids can see me with you," Homer giggled and replied "That's not really gonna work out, because guess who is your knew substitute teacher, come on guess, come on don't be shy," Bart just stared at Homer for a while, then his eyes grew a metre and he said "no, no, NO, NOOOOO!"