I was miserable. When I found out that I was going to leave Yancy, at first I tried to tell myself that it was going to be okay. I mean, I was bullied by Nancy and her evil cronies, and other than Grover, I was left out. I told him I was fine, but I knew the truth.
I was so ashamed. I knew that this meant I had to deal with Smelly Gabe, and that was like a kick to my side, and I am already down. He would push me around, no regard for those things called emotions, and that hurt. He always made fun of me, my grades, my disabilities, I was so close to breaking down . The pressure was too much.
I told Grover that I was studying for our Latin test, which I tried to do, but all that happened was the radio being on so loud that no one heard me crying. My mom was going to hide her hurt, because there are only so many places that will give you full financial aid that is a boarding school that caters to ADHD/dyslexic kids like me. I wasn't sure how much time passed, but Grover came in and all I was doing was staring at the textbook, my tears ceased and feeling numb around the edges.
I always felt that this life wasn't entirely mine. I never fit in with anyone, not even the like-minded misfits. I really wanted something different, I was growing bitter at those around me. I was lost, because I had this feeling that someone was abusing me, but I had no idea who, because no one associates with me enough to use me. I might just be paranoid though. Who knows? I might have this big huge old prophecy depicting me being used and my impending doom, for all I know. I feel so left out in the dark, like the school was playing a trick on me. But, the weird thing about my life, is that I underwent this mix of emotions every year. The torrent of attitudes, feeling useless, it was familiar.
Lucky me, that means I will go through this next year. Humph. Welcome to my life.