Summary: After the final confrontation, Creed reflects his encounter with Train and the meaning of his own existence...
A/N: I wrote this a while ago after I've finished reading the manga. I've always felt sorry for Creed (I have this thing for tragiccharacters;) especially towards the end, so I decided to write something from Creed's point of view. Please read and review!
Warning: This is not betaed and as I'm not a native speaker, I apologize in advance for any errors and mistakes.
JUST A DREAM
by Rebbi
Lying in the dark room, wide awake, I stared at the night sky through the bedside window. The moonlight fell gently on the window ceil like a soft piece of veil, wrapping my quivering heart with soothing warmness.
All was quiet.
I closed my eyes. Pieces of memories replayed themselves inside my head, all seemed like a dream.
It has been only two days since we arrived at this little dingy hotel at the outskirt of the country. Echidna used her 'Gate' to transport us here. I had been badly wounded – by Train – the only person I have trusted.
I met Train in the second year of my career as an assassin. By that time he was already the famous 'Black Cat', No.XIII, who mercilessly brought death to thousands who stood in his way. I had admired him, yes. But when I looked into those cold dark slits in his golden eyes, shockwaves pounded my soul. I was looking at a mirror: bitterness, anguish, hatred, and the ugly world that I knew so well shone through him. We were the same, expressing our anger against the world that forbade our existence by torturing, killing, revenging…
Finally, I had found an equal, an attachment. I trained harder than ever to become stronger, powerful enough to catch up with Train, to become his partner. I am not alone anymore. Together, we would change this ugly, corrupted world into a utopia. For the first time, my life had meanings. I had dreams.
But all was shattered, with the appearance of Minatsuki Saya.
Train changed. His refusal to kill the target unnerved me. But the shock came when I saw Train talking to the girl, with a smile on his face. A smile. Not a cruel laugh, a taunting sneer, but a genuine smile. Slowly, Train drifted away. I wanted to scream, wanted to clutch to his sleeve, wanted to do whatever that would make him stay by my side. But he was blinded by witchcraft of Minatsuki Saya. I had to eliminate her! Sacrifice is necessary to build our perfect world, and Train will understand!
I was wrong.
It saddened me that Train saw me as his enemy, but I was pleased that Train has not forgotten the word 'Revenge'. He was weakened by his useless emotions for that dead woman, but the glint of coldness lingered in his eyes assured me that I could still revive the feared 'Black Cat'. There was still hope.
I waited for Train to return to me, even if with the motivation of killing me. I waited patiently for the last encounter, and then Train would be by my side. But deep down, I knew I was fighting a losing war.
We've finally met, and all my hopes were gone when I saw that wretched woman staring at me through Train. I did not know the person in front of me. He was no different from some dirt in the gutter in my eyes. I felt something cold and wet trickling down my cheek. Train Heartnet has died. And my world fell apart.
Death. Death was my last escape. I could not let the 'Black Cat' in my heart be corrupted as well. Train belonged to me. Kill him, and in death, we would reunite again.
The last confrontation came. I was about the eliminate the disgusting being that has contaminated my Train Heartnet when a sudden ray of light stroke down, and I saw, by his side, was Minatsuki Saya.
I was defeated. My dark world was swallowed by that ray of light.
Why? WHY!
"I thought you would understand! I thought you, of all people, would know what it feels like to live alone in this twisted, ugly world! Kill me, Train, KILL ME!"
"No. I want you to live. Live like a human in this world you hate so much, and try as hard as you can to find all the little things you like about it. That's the meaning of your life. Saya saved me two years ago, and you can be saved too."
I tilted my head a little. Echidna was dozing in a chair next to my bed. She has barely slept in these two day, restlessly taking care of me. I wondered why she didn't abandon me, now so weak and powerless. Breathing softly, she had a smile on her face. That beautiful smile became like a flicker of light, guiding me out of darkness.
Suddenly, I understood.
For all my life, I wanted to escape that suffocating darkness surrounding me. I did not hate the others. I was simply too jealous. Jealous of how they can laugh so care-freely, jealous of how they can love someone so passionately, jealous of how they can live their life so joyfully. I was jealous of Train. I wanted to be saved, too.
My hand quivered as I touched Echidna lightly on the cheek. She woke, staring at me, her eyes full of warmness and comfort.
'Can I be saved?' I whispered.
'Yes, I will save you no matter what it costs.' She leaned over and kissed me softly on the forehead.
I fell into sleep peacefully, knowing that there would be no more nightmares.
A/N: Waaaah poor Creed, wanna give him a hug! (TT) Anyways, please leave a review and tell me what you thinkabout this fic!