This is my first ever fan fiction. I hope you all like it. Some of this story is based on my life and I wrote this story to get my feelings out.

I know Teen Wolf is American but I'm from Wales so please if there are words that I have got wrong, such as writing mobile phone insteadof cell phone please tell me.

I don't own teen wolf or any of its characters.

And please review! Thanks :-D

Chapter 1
It's was in the summer and were all were gathered in Derek's newly refurbished house. I'm the only one standing while Alison, Lydia, Jackson, Issac and Danny where sitting on the sofa with a surprised look on their faces. My best friend Scoot was laughing his ass off and Derek well... Was being Derek and was probably not listening sitting in his chair opposite the sofa. Scott might of thought I was joking but then he realized that it was no joke I was being serious.

"What?" Scott said, surprised about what I said.

"I'm leaving the pack" I announced for a second time, wondering how everyone is going to react.

"That's not funny, Stiles", Lydia said with a panicked look on her face.

"So not funny", Issac said looking very angry.

"It's not supposed to be, I'm being serious" I said trying not to stare at Derek who's eyed turned red and who's face just looked like he had been punched.

"WHY" Said Alison looking at Scott, no doubt worrying about how it would affect her boyfriend, my best friend Scott if I left the pack.

"I'm just too busy what with revising for exams, practicing for the lacrosse try-out and with looking after my dad"

Lie

"I don't have time for pack stuff at the moment" I said hoping they would believe me.

"Bullshit" I heard Derek say in a whisper to himself.
"I'm going for a run" said Derek rushing quickly out of the room and out of the front door.

"What's up with him?" I said trying to keep myself relaxed. Oh shit what if they can hear my heart and know that I'm lying.

"No idea" Jackson said rushing out the door after him.

"Well anyway I've got to get home and make dinner for my dad….. it's been fun" I said hoping no one would say anything else about it as I walked out the door, "oh and say goodbye to Sourwolf for me".

I was walking towards my jeep, or I should say almost running trying to get out of there before they realized I was lying about why I was really leaving the pack. But of course I couldn't tell them the really reason for leaving the pack because they wouldn't understand. I left the pack because I'm not good enough for them. I'm a skinny, dumb idiot with ADHD and I'm annoying. I don't deserve to be in the pack and not good enough to be friends with them or to have any friends at all.

When I got home, I went straight upstairs and wrote in my journal. I write everything in my journal including my thoughts and feelings and I left my phone downstairs so no one would be able to contact me. I got into bed and spent about an hour thinking about how much better the world would be If I wasn't in it. I hoped I would have the same dream that I have every night, the dream where I'm not me but I'm actually someone worthy of life and deserves to have Scott, Allison, Issac and everyone else as friends and deserve to be with the secret love of my life,

Derek.