Hey all. This is the start to my first published Ruroni Kenshin stories so I hope you thoroughly enjoy it. And when I mean thoroughly, I absolutely mean thoroughly.
- Twisted Transistorz
*Unfortunately I do not own Ruroni Kenshin. Lyrics from "Winter" by Bayside.
Postcards From Far Away
When winter falls
It was a beautiful day outside. The sun was shining its glorious rays across the land. Clouds fluffy as marshmallows, grass healthier and greener than ever. Birds cheerfully singing their songs in the high tree tops. It was the ultimate perfect day.
Next year, I'll be holding on to anything nailed down.
Why did it seem that even the most perfect of days could possibly be the worst days of your entire life? Even the most perfect of days could turn into the most perfect storm. How do you keep a perfect day to just stay perfect?
As for being patient, With fate and all it's getting old.
As Kaoru gazed out of her bay window, tears continued to roll down her face, silently weeping. Today was suppose to be her perfect day.
And my mind is slowly changing.
The day that her fiancé came home from the war. Instead she had received a letter and what remained of her dead fiancé's body. To come home and rest in the ground forever.
I'm calling all my oldest friends, saying sorry for this mess were in.
He had been shot seven times before his body gave into death. He had been their best soldier, 'the Battousai' they called him.
And I'm waiting, waiting, for the sun to come and melt this snow,
Kaoru knew even before he left that something was not right, that something terrible was going to happen to her beloved. How she would give anything now to be wrong.
Wash away the pain and give me back control, control.
Now Kaoru was alone, completely alone. Her mother and father had passed when she was very small and she had to live alone and fend for herself until her beloved saved her from the blackness of this world. He had taken cared of her and had loved her as she did the same for him. He was her everything.
An angel got his wings
Now, her heart was shattered, seemingly beyond repair as she kept looking outside her window to another perfect day. More like other people's perfect day, her personal living nightmare.
And we'll hold our heads up knowing that he's fine.
In the dark and lonely house she would live in. In her personal tomb. Alone and utterly broken. How could he do this to her? They were getting married in two more weeks, how could he do this to her! Why for so long, for so many battles she stood awake all night did he have to leave her now? More tears spilled silently down her face and Kaoru tried to wipe her sapphire blue eyes dry.
We'd all be lucky to have a love like that in a lifetime.
She hated to feel this way, utterly broken and completely lost. This was not her at all. She was a strong and happy person. She needed to be strong for her sake and for the people who cared about her.
Should we still set his plate? Should we still save his chair?
Kaoru finally got up and got ready for another day, another day without her beloved. 'Stop thinking like that.' Kaoru reprimanded herself. 'Stay positive, you can survive this. Besides, its not like you won't ever see him again. You will see him when you have passed and gone to the next world and together you will be happy.'
Should we still buy him gifts? And if we don't did we not care?
Instead of putting on her beautiful white dress, she adorn herself with the heavy and dark black dress. It felt like a straight jacket to her, that it was final. He was gone. She cried even harder.
It makes you think about the life you've led,
She wiped them away furiously. 'Put it together Kaoru. Your friends and family need you right now. Be strong. Be strong. Be strong.'
The shit you've done, the things you've said,
She climbed down the stairs finally to face her friends, Sano, Megumi, Aoshi and Misao and Yahiko. Tae and Tsubame from The Akebeko had came and even Saito was there to pay his respects. They were standing, waiting for her, all had solemn faces and all trying to hold back tears.
And its grounding, grounding.
Kaoru smiled weakly at them trying her best to compose herself as she finally ascended the stairs.
"Hey everyone. Thanks for coming over, I... I really appreciate it. Um, There's some snacks in the corner thanks to Tae and Tsubame and I think you know where pretty much everything else is. So, yeah, thank you for coming..." She said weakly, giving her best smile in this kind of situation.
I've been feeling three feet tall this month, hardly indestructible,
Misao came over to Kaoru and wrapped her small arms around the poor girl.
But the snow melts, and the rhythm still goes on.
Kaoru tried not to cry but faltered as she sobbed silent tears into Misao's small shoulder.
An angel got his wings
One after another her friends came up to pay their respects and after joked around to lighten the mood. Hoping that in their efforts that Kaoru would forget about her black hole in her chest for at least a moment.
And we'll hold our heads up, knowing that he's fine.
"Hey Kaoru," Sano yelled across the room. "Remember the time that Kenshin fell into the lake? And when he came out he was completely covered with all of this gross seaweed and muck. He looked like Cousin Its' green brother."
We'd all be lucky to have a love like that in a lifetime.
Kaoru smiled and laughed. "Yes I remember that. It took him two weeks to finally stop smelling like seaweed and frogs."
They all talked for hours about the man who had virtually brought them all together. In a sense, this was his last gathering with all of his friends and loved ones. A present from Kenshin to be handled with care in each of them.
Friends stay side by side
Eventually everyone started to go out the front door and back into reality. Kaoru started to clean up the cups and plates that were littered all over the place. Misao, watching her best friend struggle put a hand on Kaoru's back.
"We can take care of this, why don't you get ready to go to sleep?"
Kaoru nodded and gave one last hug to her best friend before going up to her room.
In life and death you've always stole my heart.
Kaoru showered, dried and combed her hair and entered into the empty bedroom. She looked at the damn bed that reminded her that she would be the only one sleeping in it. Trying as best as she could to be strong she picked up the picture of her and her beloved Kenshin. They were at the beach and had horrible sunburns, but were smiling and happy.
You'll always mean so much to me that it's hard to believe.
Memories came rushing back to Kaoru. The first time they met. His beautiful eyes and fiery red hair. His caring and loving personality. When Kenshin had asked her to go out on a date to the movies with him. When she had said yes. When Kenshin had first kissed her outside her doorstep and left her completely breathless. Snuggling under a blanket on the coutch and using movies and excuse to watch eachother. The way he made her feel special. Their arguments and fights about small nothings. The make up kisses that followed the arguments. When they both proclaimed their love for each other. The first time they finally decided after two years to move in together. When Kenshin had proposed to her in the middle of a beautiful garden. When she had said yes. When they wrapped eachothers arms in a loving embrace and kissed. When things were starting to look up. When Kenshin had told her that he had to fight for their country. When Kaoru had begged him to stay at home, to not leave her. When Kenshin gave her his one last kiss goodbye. The moment he turned away and walked out of her life and left her alone. "Oh, Kenshin." She whispered.
So much to me its hard to believe.
Tears welled up in her saphire pools and Kaoru finally let the dam loose in her soul. Clutching the picture of her and her beloved, she cried and begged silently to have her Kenshin back, to have another moment with him, anything, just to have him back in her life.
Still sobbing uncontrollably, Kaoru pulled her blankets over her head as she did as a child. To get away from the world, to be wrapped up in her emotions, to try and be closer to her Kenshin.
She cried for hours still clutching to the picture in her bed feeling so many emotions all at once. Sadness. Numb. Scared. Anger. Completely heartbroken. "Kenshin" she whispered. "Oh how I wish you were here."
Another wave of emotion hit her as she started morning for her dead fiance.
Kaoru eventually became exhausted from crying so much and started to drift into sleep. Still tear stricken, her face finally smoothed over into peaceful slumber. To calm and regenerate. To forget. To find comfort. To never want to wake up.
For now, Kaoru would take sleep with open arms and hope to wake up to a yesterday that never happened.
So much to me its hard to believe this.
Comments or suggestions?