Prolouge

I never thought I would fall in love. Ever. Especially not with him. Matt. Or, rather, Mail Jeevas, as he is truly called.

It was something so spontaneous. So unlikely, that I still to this day can not wholly believe.

I had seen him around the institution all my life. How could I not? We had both grown up there. Both seen each other every single day of our lives. But we had never talked. Never. Not once, did I, or he, think to give the other something as simple as a hello. Never. But it never occurred to me to mind. Never did I long to learn more about that goggle-wearing red head with a habit of smoking. At least, I told myself I didn't want to know. I lied to myself. Deceived myself into thinking I could care less. Why do this? You may be wondering to yourself. Well, simply enough, I figured, I assumed, he wanted nothing to do with me.

And so, to protect myself, I shied away from him.

We've all heard of karma. Heard of how it someday will come back to get us. To make sure we pay our dues for the things we've done. Well this is the story of my own karma, and how brutally it repaid me.

My karma got me back, with love.

There is no greater punishment than that.

1. Matches & Meetings

Often I wander throughout the world with my mind on other things. On other places. It is not often that I stop to check that I am indeed heading in the right direction. Rather, I allow myself to drift aimlessly, and hope, hope, that I somehow find my way.

But, because this is a story about karma, you probably could have guessed that, this one particular time, I was unable to end up where I should have.

"What do you want?" asked a voice, his voice, over the buzzing and beeping of his video game.

My mouth fell open. My cheeks burned red. I stood like a fish out of water, dumb and helpless, as I realized with shocked awareness that I had stumbled upon the person I most wanted to avoid.

And worse, he had spoken to me.

"I'm-I'm sorry," I managed to say. "I didn't mean to…" I trailed off. Unable to announce the thing I hadn't meant to do: acknowledge him.

He paused his game and looked up at me. His stark red locks fell over his translucent orange goggles in spikes. But I could tell, through the barricade that the goggles themselves presented, that his eyes were curious, as if wondering who in the world this stumbling, vacant girl standing at the doorway to his bedroom could be.

"Don't worry about it," he said smoothly. "You're not bothering me."

I could only stand there. There were no words to describe what I was thinking or how I was feeling. I was simply there.

"You're…Arsa, right?" he said at length.

I was surprised, to say the least. How could he, this boy I had known all my life but hadn't had the courage to speak to, possibly know my name? I could only nod. I didn't trust my voice. I feared my vocal cords would betray my delight and excitement.

A small ghost of a grin fell over his lips. He seemed amused with me. Much like a cat is momentarily amused with a ball of string, or a mouse trapped beneath its crushing paws.

Finally, I realized he must have been waiting for me to speak. "And you're Matt?" Thankfully, I was able to state my question without the embarrassment of any squeaks or stutters.

He nodded. "Mhm." He looked me up and down for a long moment. I, too, took a second to fret about my appearance. I knew my hair was unruly and unchecked after a game of soccer out on the lawn. My skirt was wrinkled and dirt smudged. Self conscious as any girl of only thirteen years old, I tried to arrange myself into something more acceptable. "I've seen you before. Playing soccer, I mean," Matt said in a soft voice. "You're very good, actually. I saw you score several times today."

My cheeks only grew redder at his compliments. He'd seen me? He actually knew of my existence before this very moment? It was almost as if I had fallen into a dream. Into one of my most secret of daydreams. I had to remind my lungs how to go about in the act of breathing.

"T-Thank you," I said. "But it wasn't really that big of a deal." I shrugged. "Ernie is a really rotten goalie…"

"It's still better than I could do," he responded. He ran a gloved hand through his hair. For a moment, before the locks fell back into place over his forehead, I could almost make out what he looked like beneath his obtrusive goggles.

A full minute of awkward silence existed like a shadow, like something alive and suffocating, as our attempt at conversation fell to a lull. I knew deep in my gut that I should excuse myself. I should make up an excuse to leave, lest I give my brain too much to analyze, to go over again, later that night as I would lie in my bed.

Suddenly, as I had hoped, a shout rang through the corridor behind me. I jumped as the noise pierced my ears after the moments of silence.

"Arsa!" someone shouted. The sound of ungainly footfall approached. Then, standing next to me was Alicia, a small girl of only 8 years old. She looked from me to Matt with her large, curious eyes. "Arsa," she said, quieter this time. "We're starting up another game. You comin'?"

I found myself glancing at Matt, but was disappointed to find that he had turned his attention back to his video game. Beeps and electronic bloops were the only noise to emit from his bedroom now. I knew I was being dismissed.

"Uhm yeah…" I answered Alicia. "I'll be there in a sec."

The girl gave a wide, angel's smile and darted off, presumably going to recruit more players for the match.

"Well I'll, uhm, see you later then… " I said quietly in Matt's direction. I took several steps backwards, already preparing myself to dash off, away from this unfortunate fantasy.

As I turned my back, as I shifted the focus of my mind to the match, I heard the softest, sweetest goodbye my ears had ever had the satisfaction to hear uttered. "Good luck…Arsa."

And I was off. Like a bullet from a gun. Like sparks floating away from a larger fire. With each footstep, with each breath, I was forcing myself to forget him. To forget his words. To forget the brief encounter I had just experienced. I couldn't allow myself to linger on them. If I did, my heart, my very being would only become more vulnerable to the deceptions of the world. To love.

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A.N: Hey guys! yay! it's my first ever post of ! *cheers* please, please let me know what you thought. Please?