"So, Sirius… How are we supposed to make this lovely little plan of yours work?" James asked, stretching on his bed. They had been listening to Sirius ramble on for fifteen minutes about how hard it was to find a werewolf a mate, and the importance of not being a virgin. In conclusion to his long-winded talk, they were going to try to find Remus a girlfriend.

"I dunno. I gave you two the idea, now you two gotta come up with something really good," Sirius said, shaking his shaggy black hair out of his eyes. Suddenly, James got a mischievous smile on his face.

"What is it, Prongs?" asked Wormtail, chewing on a chocolate-chip muffin. James' smile turned into a grin.

"You know.. Dumbledore's granddaughter is here this year. She just transferred from a school in Japan, I heard.. I also hear that she's quite the looker," he said, smirking. Peter's jaw dropped.

"You want to hook Remus up with the headmaster's granddaughter!" he said, disbelieving. James nodded proudly.

Sirius grinned, but as instantly as his grin had come, it left, leaving a saddened look on his face. "Yea.. But I bet Remus won't ware before he's too concerned about not having kids or getting involved or anything like that," Sirius said glumly. Peter followed suit, and tried to look depressed while eating his muffin. If you've ever tried to eat a chocolate muffin and be sad, it doesn't work. Trust me. :D

James, however, didn't give up. "But what if she's so nice that she doesn't care, and they like each other so much that neither of them cares and everything hunky dory. I mean, a relationship with a werewolf is just like a normal relationship.. Right?" James said, temping the others. Sirius laughed.

"Yea, only both people have a 'time of the month'," James and Peter started laughing too.

"You know.. I never really realized how similar the times of the month are for both women and werewolves," Peter said, trying to be cool.

"Yea.. Both get angry at that time of the month.."

"Both of them jump at you for no reason."

"Both get pissy really easy."

"Both get violent."

"Both destroy stuff."

"They both bleed!"

"…"

"…"

"What?"

"Peter, what the hell? Does Remus have a vagina, Peter?"

"Uh.. Well.. I dunno.."

"Well, Petey, you check tonight and tell us how it all comes out. 'They both bleed,' honestly.." Sirius said while James howled, holding his stomach as he laughed. "Anyways, we just got to talk about her a lot or something.. If nothing else, lie through our teeth." Peter and James nodded at this.

"All right. Well, I know that Remus is in the Common Room, and that Dumbledore girl is in the Library... I saw her on my way back from the Restricted Section to get that book on dead Quidditch players," James said helpfully.

Sirius sat up happily. "Hey guys… Let's go try to find a book for our Potions essays," he said, and in minutes the three boys were in the Common Room. Remus was in his favorite chair, closest by the blazing fire. As usual, he had his nose buried in a book.

Sirius, James, and Peter bounces up next to his chair. "Remus," Sirius said, announcing their presence once Remus didn't look up. He still didn't budge. "Remus? Remus!" Still nothing. "REMUS LUPIN!" Sirius screamed in his ear. Remus jumped, over-turning his book, and looked at him.

"Dammit, Siri, why do you have to scream in my ear? Why didn't you just calmly tell me that you're here! No need to sneak up on a guy and scare him half to death!" he said, picking up his book. He frowned when he saw that he had lost his page.

"Sorry, Remus, but we didn't sneak up on you. And we said your name three times before!" Sirius said, looking honestly sorry. "Anyways, we were hoping that you'd help us find a book in the Library. We need it for an essay." Remus gave him a disbelieving look.

"Sure I will, just as soon as you tell me why you want me in the Library so bad as to lie," he said, setting his book aside. Sirius gave one of his bark-like laughs.

"Can't get anything past you, Remus. Just thought that you'd be able to introduce us to Dumbledore's granddaughter. The last time the you-know-what was the way you don't like it, we didn't have anyone to help us with our homework that night. We figure that it couldn't hurt to have an extra helping homework hand," he said, chuckling.

Remus shrugged and nodded. "Okay, I guess it couldn't hurt. I only know her from a few classes I have without you guys, but I think she'll remember me." Sirius and James nodded quickly. Peter was now busy devouring a cookie.

"Good enough for us. We just need some help," James said, smiling innocently. Remus got up, and the four boys headed out of Gryffindor Tower and went down the stairs until they got to the Library. The four went in, and Remus looked around for a moment before marching up to the 'M' section of the books.

"Remus, where are you -" Peter began, but Remus held his hand up and simply motioned for them to follow him. He got to an open area where tables and chairs were. There, standing with a lapful of books in her arms, was who James presumed to be Dumbledore's granddaughter. He walked up to her and lightly tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around and her face was just barely above her books.

"O-Oh.. R-Remus.. Hi," she said, straining with her books. Remus quickly took them from her and set them on the table. Her arms were shaking from the sudden lack of weight. "Thanks."

"No problem. Why are you getting all those books anyway, Kyutsu?" Remus said, looking at the stack of eight books on the table. Kyutsu blushed.

"I'm a sucker for Sherlock Holmes books. Also for anything written by or on Edgar Allan Poe. I also have a few books on Quidditch that I'd like to find," she said, playing with a lock of her hair.

"Bloody hell. How are you able to read these and still get all of your work done?" Sirius asked, picking up a thick book entitled, "Volume 1; The Case of Sherlock Holmes." She giggled softly.

"I dunno.. It's easy when you work through lunch," she said, shrugging. Peter looked as if she had just cursed out his mother, but after a few minutes got over it. After a half of minute of awkward silence, Peter shouted out, "You bleed at certain times of the month!" Kyutsu looked more than mortified.

"PETER, WHAT THE HELL!" bellowed Remus. Madam Prince hurried over in seconds flat, whispering harshly.

"Mister Pettigrew, you've yelled in here many times before and I've let it slide before, but yelling about a woman's time in the middle of the Library is absolutely unacceptable! Three - no, four detentions! Tomorrow, four o'clock, the Library, and leave your wand in your dormitory! And Remus, I can't believe you'd ever yell like that, whether inside of a building or outside. I'll let you slide, but only because you've never acted like that in here before, and you've tried to keep those two out of here as much as you could. And I must say that you had a bit of a right to yell like that after what Mister Pettigrew here said," she said, nodding at Sirius and James at the end. Remus nodded quickly.

"Sorry, ma'am, it won't happen again," Remus said, his head bowed. Kyutsu's face was beyond red. Sirius and James were laughing their asses off. Peter scurried off, his face red also. Madam Prince left, scowling. Remus turned to Kyutsu.

"U-U-Uhh.. I'm really sorry about him.. You see.. he's stupid. And, as you can guess, never had a girlfriend or is ever good around women.. He would've taken Muggle math studies, but he was afraid that he'd have to take algebra, because 'bra' is in it.. Aherm.. Anyways.. Maybe I can take you out some time and make it up to you?" Remus said, face red. Kyutsu nodded, holding a book tightly to her chest.

"Y-Yea.. Sure.. That sounds good. The Three Broomsticks tomorrow during the Hogsmead trip? I have to.. Um.. Attend to something at eleven right down the block from it, so let's call it about eleven thirty or noon?" she said, pushing her square, black glasses up on her nose. Remus nodded softly.

"All right, sounds good," he said, grinning happily.

"Okay, see you then.. Oh! You're a Doyle fan, Remus, do you have any idea what happened to The Case Book of Sherlock Holmes?" Kyutsu asked, smiling softly. Remus chuckled.

"Yea, I do," Remus said, reaching into his bag. He pulled out a small, thick book and held it up. "I took it out yesterday, maybe we could read it together?" he said, a small smirk on his face. Kyustu chuckled and nodded.

"Okay, Remus, sounds good," she said, waving at them before picking up the large stack of books from the table and heaving them off. Sirius and James were grinning at each other as Remus strutted down the next few hallways proudly. Suddenly, realizing what he had just done, he stopped dead in his tracks, looking mortified.

"Pr-Prongs? Pads? Did I just-"

"Yes, you did, Moony," Sirius said, grinning from ear to ear.

"B-But, I don't want-"

"Yes you do, Moony," James said, grinning. "You want a relationship with her and you know it. Your natural niceness and neediness makes you need a woman. Badly. You two might fall desperately in love, you'll claim her, become a real man, finally, get married, and have kids," he finished happily. Remus looked sick. The two eldest Marauders grinned at each other and clapped him on the shoulders.

"Don't worry, Remus, mi'boy! We wouldn't let our best mate and homework helper do this alone. We'll help you sweep her right off of her feet," Sirius said happily.

"And hopefully not right onto the ground," James added, chuckling. "We'd never let our little Remypoo out on his first date unaided!" Sirius ruffled Remus's hair at this comment.

"Maybe I could just run and catch up with her and tell her that I'd like to, but can't, and that's it," said Remus, turning around. Sirius and James turned him back around and entwined their arms around Remus's.

"No no no, Remypoo, if you do that then she'll hate you and go crying and tell every other girl in school who will completely shun you, getting rid of your good-guy reputation in an instant," Sirius said, tapping the top of Remus's nose. Remus sighed softly and hung his head.

"So how are we going to make this work?" he asked glumly. Sirius and James grinned at each other wildly.