My Little Pony: Dragonball Z Wars
AN: A ponyized story about the stupidity of Ocean and FUNimation's feud, as well as my distaste for the redub and how ridiculous Ocean's censorship was (even though all the "another dimension" lines are quite classic). For your convenience, both dubbing companies will be personified as a single pony.
"Yeah! Goku rocks!" said Rainbow Dash.
"Awww!" said Pinkie Pie. "Recoome was my favorite member of the Ginyu Force."
"He ain't dead," said Applejack. "He's just knocked out."
"Jeice sounds kinda familiar," said Rarity.
Soon the episode was over, while Goku was fighting Burter and Jeice.
"I can't wait to see Goku beat up Burter and Jeice!" said Rainbow Dash.
However, the next day, the first episode, The Arrival of Raditz was on.
"What?" said Rainbow Dash. "What happened to our next episode?"
"Cancelled?" said Ocean, a blue pegasus pony with a light blue mane and tail with a one-star Dragonball as his cutie mark.
"Yes," said FUNimation, a red unicorn pony with a blue mane and tail, and a four-star Dragonball as his cutie mark. "Apparently ponies aren't very interested in the show anymore."
"But we're just getting up to the part where they fight Ginyu!" said Ocean. "Or have you not read the manga?"
"I've read the manga," said FUNimation. "I think your editing is the reason they hate it so much. The fighting isn't as violent as it should be, blood has only been shown once, in Episode 6. Not to mention all the times characters are said to evacuate during Nappa's attacks. They were supposed to die."
"But wouldn't that be a bit too violent and graphic for My Little Ponies?" said Ocean.
"And the 'sent to another dimension' crap is getting old quickly," said FUNimation. "You were using the word 'kill' in the first three episodes, why the change?"
"Technically Bulma says 'die' in Episode 30," said Ocean.
"This is all your fault, you loser!" said FUNimation. "If it wasn't for your stupid censorship, our series would continue!"
"We'll disappoint the fans!" said Ocean.
"What fans?" said FUNimation. "We are THROUGH! You hear me? And if I ever see you again, I'll run you through with my horn!"
"When is the next episode coming?" Rainbow Dash asked FUNimation once she got an audience with him.
"Thanks to that LOSER, Ocean, it isn't," said FUNimation.
"WHAT?" said Rainbow.
"We received negative reviews due to excessive censorship," said FUNimation.
"WHY YOU..." said Rainbow, dashing at him, but Applejack bit her tail to hold her back.
"Hey," said Rarity. "People watch the channel 'Cartoon Network', and they might be interested in it if it goes on. People who watch YTV lost interest due to shows like Spongebob and Powerpuff Girls taking its place in their minds."
"I am not airing it on ANOTHER channel!" said FUNimation. "Be thankful I'm keeping it on YTV."
Rarity held up a sparkling gem.
"Deal!" said FUNimation.
A few days later, fanmail started pouring into FUNimation's house, Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone style.
Soon the letters began asking "What happens after Goku beats up Recoome?"
"I'll have to continue the series," said FUNimation. "But I'll have my crew dub the episodes, and I'll leave them uncensored. The word 'kill' will be used again."
The next day, Episode 54, Ginyu Assault, finally came up. The ponies watched all the new episodes of Dragonball Z, up to the end of the fights with Frieza, the death of Frieza in Episode 106, and up to the Cell Saga.
"Can we join forces again?" said Ocean, after the episode "Gohan's Desperate Plea" came on TV.
"Not a chance, loser!" said FUNimation.
"In that case, I'll dub the episodes on YTV from here on!" said Ocean. "You can keep those violent episodes on Cartoon Network, and I'll let Episodes 54-167 stay as is, to avoid disappointing the fans."
"Nopony watches it on YTV," said FUNimation.
"Hey, the voices changed again!" said Pinkie Pie when the episode "Android Explosion" came on.
"Piccolo sounds like Chief Thunderhooves again," said Rainbow Dash.
Although they enjoyed the episodes, they did notice that the word "hurt" was used quite ridiculously, and "leave" was used as a euphemism for "die" a little too often. One day, Pinkie Pie took a VHS she used to record episodes, and turned the closed captions of the TV on, and noticed that the closed captions, which followed FUNimation's dub, said "kill" in a place where the character said "hurt".
"What?" said Pinkie Pie. She did more research and discovered that Ocean was replacing every use of "die" with "leave", "kill" with "hurt", and "dead" with "gone". "Not this again! At least 'gone' is a good euphemism, and 'leave' is used on occasion, but this is ridiculous!"
Pinkie Pie walked over to Ocean's office.
"Come in," said Ocean.
"I have come to file a complaint!" said Pinkie Pie. "Why are you censoring the words 'kill', 'death', 'dead', and 'die' so ridiculously!"
"Those words are too violent to be used in this show," said Ocean.
"How different is it from Gundam Wing?" said Pinkie. "You even have characters saying hell and damn in it!"
"You've got a point there," said Ocean.
"FUNimation has been saying it for over a hundred episodes!
"DON'T SAY THAT NAME!"
"And that doesn't change the fact that characters are killed. Cell is disintegrated, Spopovich is blown up, and Majin Buu turns people into candy and eats them! Are we supposed to believe that they're not dead? Besides, I've seen the episode list. The next episode on is 'Gotenks is Born', and then 'Unlikely Friendship', and do you know what the title of the next episode is?"
"I can't remember," said Ocean.
"The title of the next episode," said Pinkie Pie, "is 'I Kill No More.'"
"All right, you've made your point," said Ocean.
The ponies watched the episode "Gotenks is Born" that day. At the scene where Gotenks flew off to fight Buu, Piccolo said "If he gets killed now, all our efforts are in vain."
"THEY FINALLY SAID KILL!" said Rainbow Dash.
"Buu make boy dead!" said Majin Buu at one point.
With no more censorship of the words like "kill" and "dead", the ponies enjoyed Dragonball Z all the way to the final episode.
"I wish we could have seen Smitty explode," said Rainbow Dash at one point. "At least we know he's dead, and they didn't cut out any part of Van Zant's death scene."
"Except for him shooting at Evil Buu," said Pinkie Pie.
"'Dear FUNimation,'" said FUNimation, reading a letter. "'Just wondering why Captain Ginyu's voice changed so drastically from Season 1. Not that I didn't like his new voice, just curious as to the reason behind it. Signed, Princess Luna.' Dammit, I forgot the first 53 episodes were dubbed by that loser. I don't want anything to do with him, so I'll redub those episodes. And, to add confusion, I'll extend the 53 episodes into 68 episodes, and name one of them after an episode in the Cell Saga: 'Sacrifice'."
The DVD box set of the first saga, called "Vegeta Saga" came out a few days later.
"That's funny," said Twilight Sparkle as she saw the box set in stores. "Wasn't it called 'Saiyan Saga'? And why does it have 41 episodes on the back? Isn't Episode 41 in the Namek Saga, where Krillin meets Guru? Come to think of it, Guru kinda sounds like Snips, and Zaacro sounds like Snails."
Twilight's mouth hung open as she watched the episodes. They had entirely different titles, redubbed in FUNimation. The soundtrack was not the usual good soundtrack of FUNimation episodes of Dragonball Z, but was quite dull. Vegeta's voice was almost as deep as Piccolo's.
"Whoever's doing his voice sounds like he's really straining it to sound like that!" said Spike.
When the Namek Saga came out, Twilight bought it and watched it. Zarbon's voice change was even worse than Vegeta's.
"I know he's vain, but that voice is SO not Zarbon!" said Rarity.
"Yeah!" said Applejack. "He's supposed to talk with an Australian accent, y'all!"
"Why did you change Vegeta and Zarbon's voices?" said Twilight to FUNimation in his office. "I don't really think those voices suit the characters."
"Because," said FUNimation, "I don't want them to sound too much like their Ocean voices anymore. I want to dissociate myself as far from that loser as I can. Why don't I redub the rest of the series while I'm at it? I don't want Vegeta talking in his 'original dub' voice for the whole..."
"At least he sounded a bit different," said Twilight.
"He still sounded like Vegeta," said FUNimation. "I'm paying the actor double time to do that deep voice."
FUNimation modified the Dragonball Z websites, replacing all info on the first 53 episodes as the redubbed 68 episodes, and Episode 54, Ginyu Assault, became Episode 69.
"They replaced it entirely!" said Rainbow Dash.
"I liked it the way it was!" said Rarity. "The voices and soundtrack were simply divine! These ones aren't nearly as good!"
However, FUNimation's sales did not go as well. He found garbage cans full of the box sets, and ponies everywhere were walking around saying "Dragonball Z sucks!"
"What's going on?" said FUNimation.
"Original dub," said Twilight, as she, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Rarity walked over to him.
"I don't feel like talking to you," said FUNimation.
Ocean appeared at the mane six's side. "FUNimation, we can join forces again and sell box sets of original dub together."
"NO!" said FUNimation. "You're a LOSER! You're nothing but a LOSER! Your censorship was too..."
"For your information," said Ocean, "I stopped avoiding words like 'kill', at the suggestion of a pink pony that I should have listened to from the beginning."
"You two can make up and work together again," said Twilight. "Ocean learned that the show was fine without censoring words like 'kill'. FUNimation, the original dub was fine the way it was, both Ocean AND FUNimation portions of it. You didn't have to redub them just to spite your partner. You made Episodes 54-167 as good as any Ocean episodes, but ruined them in your attempt to spite Ocean."
"And you didn't have to spite your partner because he almost got the show cancelled," said Fluttershy. "He didn't mean to. He just made a bad decision."
"Besides," said Twilight, "did you notice that 75% of the complaints have the same writing, and are listed as 'anonymous?' We checked them out, and discovered that half of them were written by Gilda, and the other half by Trixie."
"So what I thought were complaints from 500 ponies were really complaints from two ponies?" said FUNimation.
"Well, one pony and a griffin," said Rainbow Dash.
"And I think the other 25% were Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon," said Applejack. "Apple Bloom said she heard them braggin' about it."
"You can release a box set of the series that gives the option of watching edited, in original dub, or uncut, in redub, in case anypony prefers it," said Twilight.
"Do you think it'll work?" said FUNimation.
"It's worth a try," said Twilight.
When the next box sets were released, FUNimation and Ocean were raking in cash.
"Sorry for calling you a loser," said FUNimation.
"I can't hear you with the rake in your mouth," said Ocean.
"I said I'm sorry for calling you a loser," said FUNimation.
"I shouldn't have gone overboard with the censorship," said Ocean. "Part of it was my fault."
"It could be worse," said FUNimation, looking over at a white pony with a cyan mane and tail and an ark as his cutie mark. "At least you never replaced death with banishment to the Shadow Realm."
"Saying 'another dimension' was close enough," said Ocean. "4Kids did kill some of them, like the Big Five, and at least they used words like 'dead'. Plus, his censorship, replacing death with eternal damnation, only made the series darker."
"I thought the Big Five were imprisoned in the virtual world," said FUNimation.
"And what happens to the virtual world in the end?"
"I see your point."
"Dear Princess Celestia," said Twilight as Spike wrote a letter. "Today, an anime pony learned a valuable lesson. He got into an argument with his partner, and attempted to dissociate himself from him, to the point of making his show unenjoyable. But once they made up and rejoined each other, he became successful again. And his partner learned from my good friend Pinkie Pie not to be too ridiculous when it comes to censorship."
AN: This is NOT a stab at FUNimation, I just want them to not hate Ocean anymore, and don't like that the redub has replaced the original dub to many people. Yes, Ocean did actually stop replacing "kill" with "hurt" in "Gotenks is Born", but to the extent of my knowledge, the box set released at the end of the story only exists in my dreams. I don't know what happened between them, but the cause in this fic is my guess. And yes, I know Ocean is part of the crew of My Little Pony, hence the reference to characters who share the same voice actors sounding the same.
And yes, I know some of you may like or even prefer the redub, and I respect the opinions of others, my opinion is that the redub is inferior, but I mean no offense to anyone who thinks otherwise.
UPDATE! I would like to make three corrections to what I initially believed. 1.) Ocean didn't censor the episodes, Saban did. 2.) FUNimation never hated Ocean, they just couldn't afford to use them after Saban left. (though that still doesn't explain replacing and forgetting the original dub) 3.) They're re-releasing the original dub on DVD in July 2013!
THE END