My Life as a Teenage Half-Demon
As told by InuYasha
A/N- This is my first InuYasha fanfic, so please be gentle with the reviews. It's sort of a spin on the original story, but after what occurs in the first three or four graphic novels, I have my own plot. At first, it was to have a plot. But now I guess it's just for humor. It's just that Kikyo…ahem…I won't ruin it for you if you haven't read them yet. Anyhow, all the characters so far belong to Rumiko Takahashi. Jeebus. I almost wrote Nobuhiro Watsuki. Knowing that, guess my favorite manga. Maybe I'll do a Ranma ½ one. That'll be a laugh. Or even a Yu Yu Hakusho one. As a matter of fact, I'll start one right now. About Genkai. My hero. Lol, just kidding. If you like this, please check out my RuroKen fanfic. As always, R&R (I get pretty desperate for those, so unless you want to be responsible for my lack-of-review induced depression, please, PLEASE review. By the way, this is rated PG-13 for expletives (which I personally don't believe in, though it's something that InuYasha likes to utilize) and violence. At least it would be in a movie. Since you can't picture blood and gore dripping down someone's back, no matter how good the author is at describing, it isn't that bad. BTW, in case you didn't notice, I'm rather fond of prologues.
Prologue
Rich, successful, handsome, intelligent, and egotistical, seventeen-year-old InuYasha lived a wonderful life. The years in which his kind, half-demons, were prejudiced against were gone. His family had overcome all sorts of difficulties, but they were now the richest family in modern day Japan. It seemed as if he lived a perfect life. And it would be. If a person's idea of a perfect life consisted of death threats from your older brother, an annoying, flea-like counselor, demons (of the human variety also) attempting to take over the world, and a fiancée.
Although when InuYasha stopped to ponder about it, Kikyo wasn't all that bad. At least, for a human woman. He'd have preferred it if his parents had set him up with someone with a bit less of an attitude problem, though. InuYasha wiggled his cute, puppy ears. He could hear someone coming. Unwilling to deal with angry customers or unhappy employees, InuYasha ducked into the bathroom in his office. A CEO of the biggest electronic manufacturers in the world, he had many problems to deal with everyday. Financial ones were never one, though. Shesso-maru, various other relatives, and that double-crossing Naraku were some of them. His counselor, Myoga, constantly deserted whenever the company's stocks dropped even one percent. Of course, when it rose again, Myoga could be counted on to be standing right by InuYasha's side. Shesso-maru, InuYasha's devious half-brother, was a full-blooded demon. Though angry, young, and violent-looking, Shesso-maru had actually adopted a young human girl (though it appeared more likely that she adopted him) and was taking anger management classes. Those classes actually working were another matter.
Because InuYasha inherited his company from his mother, Shesso-maru had to start on his own. As one could imagine, this caused a little discord. Not to mention that while InuYasha got the most powerful sword from the demon world, Shesso-maru was stuck with one that couldn't even injure someone. And being a competitive sibling, Shesso-maru created his own company, also a manufacturer of technology. Shesso-maru still was furious that his little half-breed brother had a higher rank than he did. Thus he was constantly out to kill InuYasha. However, InuYasha had eluded him many times, with the help of his trusty sword, Tetsuiga.
"InuYasha, InuYasha?"
InuYasha groaned and silently smacked himself on the head.
"InuYasha? Where are you?"
"Here, Kikyo." InuYasha stepped out of the lavatory and took a seat on his swiveling office chair. He twirled a pencil between his fingers.
"There you are. Myoga is looking for you," Kikyo told him.
"That old flea bag?" InuYasha rolled his eyes.
"That old flea," Kikyo corrected, evoking a grin from InuYasha.
"All righty, then. I'll go see what he wants." Putting down the pencil, InuYasha got up and exited the room.
Kikyo remained in his office. She was thinking of staying for a bit, perhaps getting one of the workers to bring her a latte and waiting for InuYasha. She walked over to his desk. She spotted a corner of what looked like a photograph buried underneath InuYasha's pile of unsigned contracts. Picking it up gently and not disturbing a single sheet, she saw the photo and gasped. A woman, another woman, with her arms wrapped around InuYasha, was smiling up at her. The woman bore a striking resemblance to Kikyo herself, only she appeared a year or two younger and she wore clothes of an extremely unusual fashion. Kikyo flipped over the photo. On the back, in InuYasha's strong, wavy penmanship were the words, "20XX, Kagome and I on the beach."
Kagome. The name itself struck Kikyo as odd. And the year 20XX? It was fifty years from that day. Kikyo flipped open her Verizon Wireless cell phone and pressed the speed dial number. There was only one person she ever needed to call urgently. Beep…beep…she waited patiently for him to pick up. Four rings went by. Five. No one answered. Angered, she slammed the phone closed and stormed down the stairs.
"INUYASHA!" she shrieked.
Ten flights down, InuYasha's keen ears pricked up. "Be right back, Myoga. Kikyo doesn't sound very pleased right now."
Running up the stairs, InuYasha passed Kikyo on the way up. "What's wrong, Kikyo?" he asked, concerned.
"What's wrong? You have the nerve to ask me what's wrong? Why don't you ask your precious Kagome," she spat, hurling the picture at him. It hit him on the side of his head.
"Wha—?" InuYasha was dumbfounded. "But…but I don't know anybody named Kagome."
Kikyo did not seem to accept that as an excuse and stormed out of the building. InuYasha had no choice but to unfold the crumpled up photo. At first glance he thought it was Kikyo, but then realized that the girl was about two years younger and had slightly different eye color. He looked at the back which had in his handwriting, "20XX, Kagome and I on the beach." He hurried back downstairs after Kikyo calling, "Kikyo wait! I didn't write this!" He pushed open the revolving glass doors only to run straight into Kikyo.
"I will give you one chance to redeem yourself," she said slowly. "If you want to, come meet me in the back of the abandoned well by the hamlet on your manor in one hour." With this, Kikyo stepped down the stairs and melted in with the crowd.
InuYasha stood there for a few moments, his mouth working but no sound coming out. He turned around and strode back into the ground floor of his company. He slammed a fist down onto an unfortunate receptionist's desk and barked, "Get me a limousine. Quickly."
"Yes—yessir!" The receptionist typed a few words on a screen and clicked on a few buttons. "All set. It's waiting outside."
InuYasha marched outside and into the waiting limo. "To my manor. At the road in the hamlet."
"Yessir." The driver saluted.
InuYasha breathed heavily as the tinted windows of the limo scrolled up slowly. He realized that the picture was still in his balled up fist. Stuffing it into his scarlet robe pocket, he reached into a cooler for a bottle of water. He still could not fathom what just happened; but if going to that well would appease Kikyo, he would do it. InuYasha looked at his hands. A golden band glittered from his ring finger, the sign of his engagement to Kikyo. He rubbed it gently, remembering the childhood moments they had shared together.
"We are here, sir!" The driver stopped the car and opened the door expertly for InuYasha to step out.
"Thank you. Please wait here for me."
"Aye." The driver saluted him smartly.
The abandoned well was deep in the forest behind the little hamlet that populated the grounds of his manor. Why Kikyo wanted to meet there—out of all places, InuYasha could not guess. As he rounded a corner, he saw that Kikyo was already there. A large, gaping wound was scratched on her face. "Kikyo!" he cried out, running to her. His surprise was great when he saw that she had a handgun in her hands.
"Not a step closer, InuYasha," she warned, holding the gun with a trembling but steady hand. "Why did you come back? Didn't you get what you wanted?" She looked at the ground, saw something and picked it up. "I see you didn't get it."
"Wha—what is this?" he asked.
"Prepare to die for all that you have done to me!"
InuYasha barely managed to dodge a—arrow? Coming from a handgun? What was that girl playing at? Instead it hit his arm with a dull thunk. Blood came splattering out. "What the hell, biotch?" he shouted.
Kikyo cocked the gun, aimed, and fired again.
InuYasha's last sight was a speeding arrow tearing towards heart. He slumped against the tree; paralyzed from a spell she cast on it. For even though she had been attacked by InuYasha, she could not bring herself to kill him. Kikyo, her work done, laid her hands over her chest, holding the ring InuYasha had given her and died. Minutes later, the police came, analyzed what had occurred, declared Kikyo as murdered, brought a court to InuYasha, (as they could not get him down) then tried and found him guilty of first-degree manslaughter (though it wasn't fair, since they could not wake him.) And after that whole ordeal, the court could not think of a suitable punishment. Fortunately, Kikyo's arrow did that for them. His sentence would be to remain paralyzed against the tree in an eternal sleep until someone or somebody sought to release him. Rather, could release him. People tried, but they all failed. That is, until the destined girl arrived.
I can't believe I have to write this all up. I swear that the government is against me. Just kidding, just kidding. You know what they're making me do? For parole? Write a story about my life. MY LIFE! They want all my "inner thoughts" and "deepest emotions." I'll give those bastards my innermost thoughts and stuff they wouldn't dream of. Wait till they get a load of this. They want my life story? They're getting it.
Chapter One
My Life
4:10 P.M. September 21st - Sitting in psychiatrist's office along with my two bodyguards. They are holding walkie-talkies, pacing back and forth and looking very professional. The psychiatrist just looked over my shoulder and told me to begin writing. I told him I was writing. He looked at me, rolled his eyes and scribbled something on his stupid notepad. Well, I don't give a damn about what he wrote. I mean, who's going to believe something written by a guy with a nametag that has a smiley sticker that says "Hi My Name is Doctor Jones."
Well, now you know the beginning of my sad, sad, life. Imprisonment for fifty years, frozen in time, for my apparent murder of Kikyo. After she paralyzed me against the tree, she died from blood loss. They buried the ring with her. They thought I killed her so I could steal it and use it to turn full demon. Why would I kill her? I really wanted to be human. But all the evidence pointed to my guilt. Until Kagome came along. Reincarnation of Kikyo, my ass. Who believes in those new-age pseudo-religions, anyhow? And spell? Feh. Some sort of medicine, that's it. All I know and all I care about is the fact that she freed me. I don't care how the hell she did it, only that she did. I don't know what I would have done if we didn't find out that Naraku was the real perpetrator. I guess the company would have gone to the dogs, excuse me, I meant Shesso-maru. Fifty years have passed. Lots of my friends from college have become old people. It's quite bizarre to find that I'm still stuck in the body of a seventeen-year-old. Disturbing, even.
Naraku. I will kill him someday. He tricked Kikyo and I, making her last thoughts of what a traitor I was. But I wasn't. I still can't believe he would sink so low into attacking her, making her think it was me and causing her to kill—pardon me, paralyze me. Though now that I think about it, even though she thought I betrayed her, she still couldn't bring herself to kill me. As a punishment, the officials left me there. Apparently forever, until Kagome rescued me by accident. But then Kaede had to give me an enchanted necklace, causing me to obey Kagome's every whim. Oh, I could refuse, of course. But then she'd say that blasted word "Sit" and I'd drop down flat onto the ground.
"InuYasha! Save me!" Kagome shrieked.
"I can't, fool!" I shouted back. "First of all, I wouldn't want to. Second of all, I'm pinned against this tree!"
"Ugh!" she groaned. "Free yourself then."
"Don't you think I would have if I could? Only you can do it! You're Kikyo's reincarnation. You can release the binding spell she placed on it."
Gritting her teeth, Kagome clenched her fist around the arrow shaft and yanked it out.
"Finally!" I shouted and jumped down from the tree. I easily blasted away the demon that had plagued Kagome.
Thus our mild acquaintanceship was founded on the charred remains of a stupid worthless demon. And then I found out she had the ring. The ring that my parents gave to Kikyo. Then we went to visit that old hag, Kaede, who is Kikyo's younger sister. After traveling all the way to this village in the middle of nowhere, she didn't believe my story! The nerve of that woman! But after hearing her version, I pieced together what really happened.
"InuYasha?" Kikyo whispered.
"Yes." Naraku croaked, bearing my appearance.
"Do—do you want the Shikon jewel? The one I was entrusted to, the one in my ring? Use it. Turn human, and we can live our lives in peace." Kikyo, trembling, took off the ring and held it out in her hands.
"What do you know, fool?" Naraku growled and swiped at Kikyo's face. She fell, the ring tumbling from her hands.
"What? InuYasha?" Kikyo gasped.
"Peh. Human woman. As if I'd ever marry you. Die now, and rid us of your stupidity!" Naraku hissed and bounded away.
This is when I stumbled upon Kikyo. And she thought I was Naraku, rather, the Naraku bearing my appearance. So she paralyzed me.
I never say "Peh." Everyone knows that. I only say "Feh." Duh! I can't believe Kikyo fell for that idiot's false impersonation of me. I thought she was pretty intelligent, too. As if I'm that ugly! That bastard Naraku. I'll kill him. Or did I mention that I am going to kill him. Oh, and this is just a passing comment, but I will kill Naraku, for my own sake, of course. He dared take up my perfect image and distort it! Back to the present day. The beautiful Shikon-jewel set ring shattered in that encounter, and Kagome and I are going to find it, piece it together before other demons do. Not that I want to do the world any good, no, not at all. Ha! What kind of demon would I be, then? But better I get it, turn into a full demon and rule ruthlessly than some of the other ones. By all the gods and goddesses, I've had one helluva life.
Now, though, I hope to have some piece. Shesso-maru's gone somewhere. Hopefully to keep his nose out of my business. For good. The company is starting to go up again. I can't believe how much it deteriorated when I was incapacitated. Actually, come to think of it, I can. Seeing as how it was Shesso-maru in charge…Anyhow, enough whining about my life. I will go on to my physical description. Though I don't know why you'd care. Every girl in the universe who has seen a picture of me as a young child have cooed "Awww, isn't he so cute?" or "No way! He's beyond cute, he's adorable." Then they see me now and run off screaming. So dog ears and long white hair are okay while the "cute baby half demon," huh? But not on the same half demon, just seventeen years old, huh? Isn't that hypocritical?
No, you say? You say it isn't? Do you want me to disembowel you? Devour your innards? No? You back away from me! You dare!
…bzzzz….bzzzz….static…. "The following program is interrupted due to excessive violence. We will return after these messages."
Insert the old guy from the Six Flags commercial dancing to "We Like to Party"
Ahem. My most profuse apologies about that brief intermission, everyone. Oh, that guy? He's fine. Once the surgeons are done with him. Beg pardon? You say that's why I'm not cute anymore? Because I have claws? What kind of ridiculous reason is that? I'm going out onto the street right now and asking a bystander if I look scary. And I'm taking this stupid thing with me so I can record the EXACT conversation.
Me: So, lady, am I scary?
Lady: EEEEEEEEEEEEK (runs away)
Me: Uh…. (Turning around) Madam, would you call me cute?
Lady #2: Beg pardon?
Beggar walking by: 'Scuse me mister, will you spare a penny?
Me: Get the hell away from me!! (Growls, showing fangs.)
Lady #2: POLICE! POLICE! (Drops her purse.)
Me: Ooh! Let's see how much money is in here! (Picks up purse and starts forking through)
Hi my name is Dr. Jones: Excuse me, sir, but I think it's the blood dripping off the claws.
Me: Oh. (Wipes blood onto robes. Waves hand.) Oy, lady! D'you think I'm cute? Aren't I adorable? (Turns around so nice lady can see profile view of me.)
Lady #3: I think you're absolutely to die for. Nice claws, by the way. Where'd you buy them?
Me: (Shoots out claws three inches) They're custom.
Lady #3: (unperturbed) That's great, honey. (Blows bubble with what smells like Bubblicious Strawberry bubble gum) Can you order some for me sometime? Here's my number. (Scribbles number onto notepad and hands me a sheet of Spongebob Square Pants stationery with a phone number scrawled across it.)
Me: (stands there with mouth hanging open like an idiot)
Hi my name is Dr. Jones: I think it's time we go back upstairs. You have made your point.
Me: (getting dragged along) NOOOOO! WAIT! PLEASE! (Begins thrashing about)
Hi my name is Dr. Jones: Mr. InuYasha, sir, please cease that obnoxious noise or I will be forced to call Miss Kagome.
Me: (shuts up immediately.)
After many bumps up the staircase, we make it back up to his office. He gives me this insipid questionnaire with even inane more problems. Just so you know how ridiculous it was, I have pasted a copy of it here. How does this help analyze people?
Full name: InuYasha
DOB: N/A
Who is your best friend? My cousin, twice removed from my mother's side c. The little voice in my head Orlando Bloom d. The Battôsai Do you receive an education? What's an edjukayshun? c. Waste of money Of course, fool. I'm a damn genius d. I'm too smart for schoolScore: 87.6666667
How dumb is that? How do you get an 87.6 repeating for a grade that has TWO friggin questions? And the fact that you DIDN'T ANSWER EITHER OF THEM! Uh-oh. I'm hiding that because the psychiatrist is coming to read this.
Okay. I'm straightening up now. No more nonsense. This is the real thing. Hell with it. Never mind. They aren't going to read this. Time to show 'em my true "inner thoughts"
You f'ing beep how dare you go to beep you beep ! beep They censored me! Those beeping beep !!! They want to count the number of beeps (that was not a swear) I use in a sentence. Well, I'll beeping show those beep beep beep and their beep friends with their beep looks and beep jobs in beep . That was tiring. Eight out of twenty words, or 2/5. Not good enough. I'm going to try again.
beep you beep beep beep , beep and beep , burn in beep . 7/11 words. Guess that's as good as I'll get.
"Dashing through the snow, on a pair of broken skis, over the hills we go, crashing into trees HAHAHA! The snow is turning red, I think I'm almost dead, rush me to the hospital before I lose my head!" A plastic gnome with a chubby, cheery face and no apparent off switch warbles this annoying rendition of "Jingle Bells" every single time someone breathes. And my good counselor, Myoga, thought it to be an ingenious idea to give this to me for "Christmas festivities" (it's September) and stuck it onto my desk with something permanently sticky.
I groan and bring my head down at the table as Myoga bounces around me asking "Do you like it? Do you like it?"
"What's not to like?" I said loudly. Under my breath I mutter, "Everything comes to mind," but Myoga didn't seem to hear.
"Excellent!" Myoga beams, clapping his hands excitedly, causing the gnome to begin blaring an off key "JOY TO THE WORLD, MYOGA IS DEAD. WE BARBECUUUED HIS HEEEEEEAAAAAAD! WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS BODY, WE FLUSHED IT DOWN THE POTTY, WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS BRAIN, IT WENT DOWN THE DRAIN, WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS HEEEEEAAAAARRT, WE TORE IT ALL APART!" causing Myoga to hurl his staff at the gnome, breaking off its head.
"My own little interpretation." I bowed. "Besides, Myoga. What do you care about what that stupid little plastic gnome thinks about you?"
Myoga glared at me.
I heave myself out of my swiveling chair and sigh. "Great. Now I have a headless dancing gnome that still somehow sings out of its neck cavity on my desk."
Myoga scooped up the head and marched out of the room in a huff. The buzzer on my intercom buzzes. "InuYasha," I say.
"Mr. InuYasha, someone is downstairs to see you."
"Send 'em up."
"It's a woman," my obnoxious secretary informs me smugly.
"I said 'EM, woman, not HIM," I bellow into the speaker.
"That's even more incorrect. Because I informed you that there was only one per—" I turned the intercom off and buzz the person up in a huff.
A soft knock on the door informed me that my mystery guest had arrived.
"Come in," I called, but the person, being a typical rude one, barged in before I finished my phrase.
In stepped a girl around the age of fifteen, dressed in school clothes, a typical uniform of a Japanese school. She looked everything like a normal schoolgirl, except that she wielded the bow and arrow. And she carried the Shikon Jewel. Surprised? Meet Kagome.
A/N- gaspshockhorror™ (LMAO inside joke sorry) Shesso-maru? Anger management classes? You know, this is like, the opposite of InuYasha. InuYasha was all nice and stuff cuz he was engaged to Kikyo, then she dies and he's all evil now. But of course, you know what's coming up next. If you've read InuYasha. Or watched the animé. Sorry if you are a big Shesso-maru fan. I like him too. He's really cool. But seeing as how this is from InuYasha's pov, it's only fitting that I slam him a bit. Yeah, I know the Six Flags thing is old. But I like it. If you like the beginning, but not the chapter or vice versa, let me know and I'll split up the story. Prologue another story, and a new prologue Ch.1