(Note: Based on tumblr user nocakeno's post post/171746648311/umineko-fanfic-kinzo-and-his-shitty-ancient-body
A Miracle?
Rokkenjima was a typically peaceful island. Seagulls fluttered across the beach to noisy leisure. The cooling waves caressed the golden shore, and sunlight trickled in between the plump clouds. Running her toes in the sand, Shannon sighed and continued reclining on the soft beach towel.
She dipped her hand into a tupperware bowl of strawberries. A light coating of melted chocolate touched the tips of each strawberry. She popped one into her mouth, her cheek pushing outwards as she chewed. The tangy, sweet taste delighted her taste buds, and she hummed, breaking into a wide smile.
Lounging by the sea with her favorite mystery novel was a scene right out of a romantic movie. She almost expected her prince to come, but she was satisfied with her tranquility. The bustling, stressful mansion was far behind her, and she could not hear the Madame's shrill voice. Her well-deserved day off was shaping up to be one of absolute bliss.
Unfortunately, there was one, little, tiny irritant breaking into her serenity. A sudden, coarse holler jarred her, and a meek yelp escaped her chapped lips. Rocky debris clattered down the cliff behind her and landed mere feet away from her towel.
Behind her, an elderly man was currently dangling and shouting for dear life. The sleeves of Kinzo's flowing cloak were caught on an out of place tree branch on the side of a large cliff. To Shannon, it seemed to be like a scene straight out of an American cartoon, in which the character would briefly struggle, fearfully wave to the audience, and then plummet into the ground with a resounding hole shaped like them.
She glanced over her shoulder, shadowed by the umbrella covering her. She bookmarked her novel and turned to fully gaze at the flailing man attempting to cling to the rocky cliff. She knew Kinzo frequently took long, private walks around his island, but this situation was simply outrageous. It was as if a hidden demon intervened and nudged him over the cliff, but a spark of magic rescued him and placed him in a bizarre situation. He screeched for Genji and Dr. Nanjo, seemingly ignorant of Shannon's presence on the shore several yards below.
Shannon peered at the perilous rocks underneath Kinzo. The foundations were shaped like massive spears and spikes plunging up from the earth, prepared to make Kinzo's eternal bed. The rocky spread chilled her and pricked at her skin when she drifted her gaze onto them. It felt as if a wary spell was cast on her when she attempted to look at the spiked formation. Déjà vu crossed her mind, but she banished her thought when Kinzo's voice roared out.
"Oh, Beatrice! How could you do this to me? I've searched for you for ages!" he wailed, and Shannon grimaced, furrowing her brow.
A tender hand touched her bony shoulder. Soft green curls tickled her neck as Beatrice made her presence known. A large sneer stretched into Beatrice's cheek, and clucking laughter from Gaap startled the young servant. Beatrice stood from where she crouched behind Shannon, thrusting her forefinger forward at the hapless elder.
"Look at him! Calling out for someone he harmed. This man is nothing but scum and dirt on the side of my heel," Beatrice jeered, crossing her arms, and Gaap floated in front of Shannon, waving her hand and summoning a black hole underneath Kinzo's feet.
"Come on, come on, drop already! I'll banish you to the lowest layer of the underworld for your crimes!" Gaap chortled, waving her finger, and a plethora of smaller black holes appeared to catch the remnants of fallen items.
"I-is this okay for us to simply watch?" Shannon asked, bringing her fist to her lips. "W-wait! Did you two do this?"
Gaap smirked, peering back to Shannon. "Oh, I wish. I would have loved to tempt him to fall, but Kinzo is no longer a king. He's a pathetic old man who simply lost his balance. He can't even use magic to save himself. How droll."
"Indeed. After all, this man is utterly sinful. Capturing me for all those years," Beatrice scoffed, lifting her nose into the air. "It was barbaric! What a truly vile man to keep me tied down in that birdcage."
Shannon hummed, slowly nodding. She had heard of the evils committed by Kinzo Ushiromiya from the whispers of the other servants and her own personal experiences. She remembered Kinzo raging against her when she mistakenly knocked into a supposedly magical urn left on a coffee table. How his voice strained her ears with bombastic terror remained ingrained in her nightmares. Only the Madame's merciless glare and subsequent punishments proved far more terrifying.
From Genji, Shannon learned about the legend of the witch haunting Rokkenjima. Kinzo summoned Beatrice for wealth, but he captured her, refusing to let her leave. Kinzo forced Beatrice to endure what was a divinely brutal fate which seemed to stretch on for eons until something happened. Somehow, Beatrice escaped. There was no need to understand how or why. It was simply magic, and now, Beatrice was free to roam Rokkenjima as the noble master of the night.
To match that cruelty, Shannon knew Kinzo harmed his children. She remembered Eva's frightened expression as Kinzo roared about her masculinity and refused to stop even as Hideyoshi defended her. Krauss endured a broken molar from the time Kinzo smashed his knuckles across his jaw. She vaguely remembered Krauss mentioning "moon tourism" before the assault occurred and how his blood marred the floor. Even Jessica faced Kinzo's monstrous punishments in the form of his notorious spankings, and her sobbing stretched throughout the mansion.
"Where will you send him, Gaap? You should hand him over to me. I'll keep him safe and secured in my birdcage," Beatrice crooned, golden butterflies drifting out from her pointer finger. "Yes, yes, that's a perfect plan! Let him fall!"
"W-will you harm him?" Shannon blurted, hurrying to her feet. Her head nudged against the umbrella, and she hunched forward, tempted to step out, but Gaap shot her arm in front of her chest.
"Shannon, you don't have to worry about this situation," Beatrice said, casting a kind smile unto her. "This is part of the witch's world. A human like yourself doesn't need to be concerned. Just close your eyes."
Gaap grinned, mirth etched into her smile. "That's right. Humans don't need to worry about magical matters."
Shannon hesitated, quickly glancing between them. Fire burned in their eyes. The wildness of magic surrounded them as golden butterflies danced and emerged through black holes. They joined together in merciless laughter, urging Kinzo to show off any sporadic magic he had left to save himself.
Shannon swallowed, bowing back underneath the umbrella with her thoughts in chaotic disarray. Kinzo was above her on what may be his final moment, and as a servant, her sworn duty was to protect him. Yet, he failed to realize her presence while she watched him kick his legs against the cliff in search of footing. Sweat tainted her brow and rolled down her cheeks. Shannon gnawed on her lower lip, and her pupils constricted. Her balled fists raised to her ears as her lone defense against the encompassing chaos as Kinzo screamed.
The branch snapped off the side of the cliff.
Then, Beatrice cupped Shannon's cheek.
Beatrice smiled, raising her forefingers and slowly brushing them against her eyelids like a paintbrush stroking a white canvas. Shannon heaved out a sigh, subdued by Beatrice's warm palm against her cheek. Beatrice leaned forward, patting Shannon's shoulder and moving towards her ear.
"It's okay, Shannon. You don't need to worry about anything. We'll take care of this situation," Beatrice murmured, and Shannon realized her book was gently placed between her clammy hands. Beatrice's breath tickled her cheek. "Just turn away and read. Immerse yourself in the world of mystery while we whisk away your worries with magic."
Shannon sat. Her back was firm and straight with the poise of a ballerina. Shannon dipped her chin to her chest as she continued reading. Above her, seagulls called out and flapped their white wings as a cooling breeze dusted her with sand.
No one interfered with her peace. The cackling of the witches behind her faded as well. A golden butterfly drifted by her knobby knees before vanishing. Shannon smiled and flipped the page.
The truth of the matter was that the friend of the witch devoured Kinzo before he hit the ground with her vast, inescapable black hole. Afterwards, the witch had her due justice by trapping and tormenting him for one thousand years. It was an equal, resolute punishment endorsed by all magical beings who stepped into Beatrice's realm.
When Shannon returned to the mansion to inform Genji of the matter, it was the absolute truth, and Genji accepted it. Even with the mangled, mutilated carcass of the master splattered against the rocks, the witch had been the one to kill him for all eternity. Thus, the witch truly became the ruler of Rokkenjima and no longer needed to hide in the darkness.