Forget Me Not
Chapter One
"Life sucks...
then you die.."
- The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn
Aria
Why did I tell him to leave? I knew he had a plausable explanation and I had every reason to shut him out but I never thought we would be in this position. There would always be an empty void in my chest that nobody except he could fill. I always believed we were inevitable but, as it turns out, things almost never go as planned.
I was here. Back to square one.
Maybe I was crazy for telling Ezra Fitz to leave Rosewood and never come back, or maybe I was crazy to let him leave. Hate him or love him, It was the worst desicion I had ever made with my life, and, as selfish as it sounds...I hope he feels the same.
Seven Years Later
I stared at the wall blankly, dishes were clanking in the sink from the party Hanna had thrown the previous night. Spencer was on garbage duty and I, was left with nothing to do.
They knew what today was, the day they left me to my own devices. Today was the seventh year that Ezra Fitz left Rosewood and took my heart with him. He bid me farewell and never came back, just as I had asked. And I never saw him once more.
He had two books published and neither of them were about us. His story about Alison DiLaurentis hit shelves five years ago and was a New York Times Best Seller. I hadn't dared to even crack it open...so it sat on my nightstand, mocking me.
I had a significant other in my life, but as fantastic as he was, he wasn't Ezra Fitz. That man had scooped my heart up and shoved a hole through it and that void was only filled when he was around me. It was like speaking in tongues not even I could understand. He always had a new way to make me fall in love with him, and while I knew I had the girls and Riley, nothing felt like it had when I was with him. Hanna always told me that one day, 'all would be right in the world and that void will be gone because I had finally found someone to fill it.'
Unfortunately, it had been almost six months that Riley and I had been officially together-we were seeing each other on and off for a long time-and my void is still there and it eats away at my energy until I can't take it anymore. I'm usually never this sad, or morbid for that matter.
I always get sad and lonely during these months of November. It was a point where I would sleep with anyone to make the feeling go away, but endorphins only last so long until the memory of my idiocy comes back and I'm left with my own thoughts while some tic-tac dick sleeps next to me, tangled in my sheets, but that was before Riley. Technically. He was my first rebound from Ezra and it was a drunken mistake that I still regret.
"Aria?" It was Hanna. I knew by the soft voice and knock. She poked her head into my bedroom. "Riley's here. I didn't know if you wanted him to come in or not so I was checking to see if you were home." I rolled my eyes and buried my head in my pillow. I shook my head furiously, growling to myself.
"I'm not here. Get me my laptop...please?" I could feel Hanna's eyes droop at my response. She walked further into my room, sitting on my bed. "You know, the more you ignore the opportunity to forget, it's just going to get even more fresh and heartbreaking." I groaned into the pillow, I didn't want to talk about my heartbreak to people, especially people who didn't understand Ezra and I, like we understood.
"Han, please. Just get me my laptop." She sighed, rubbing my back. I knew she was just trying to help but I don't take relationship advice when they're wasn't a relationship to advise.
For the past seven years I've been praying to the gods that Ezra would miraculously barge into Rosewood so that I could re-connect with him. I felt the hot fan of my laptop hit my shorts. It was autumn and slightly too cold for shorts but I didn't plan on going out. My fingers glided across the keys as I logged into my Facebook account.
Mike Montgomery:
You'll die in a year if you don't repost this.
Mona Vanderwaal:
Finally 3 Noel Kahn.
Spencer Hastings:
Hardy just farted on his hand, and then smelled it.
I chuckled at Spencer's status update. The only thing separating us was the wall between the kitchen and my bedroom but I still commented.
Classic Hardy. Next time, he should fart on Hanna and watch her have a shit conniption.
I had gotten to know Hardy extremely well as the years had progressed. Once Ezra had left, Hardy came back to town in hopes of going out for a beer but I told him it would never happen and he was confused, but understood my anger. He and Spencer got caught in a couple of dates, leaving Spencer in the middle of a fist fight between him and Toby. Surprisingly, Toby was the first one to let up.
They'd been together ever since and I could feel their love in the air; meanwhile I would sit next to Riley and politely hold his hand and smile every other minute.
My mouse hovered over Hardy's profile. I knew he and Ezra were still friends even though Ezra refused to speak to him. Throwing all of my caution into the wind I quickly clicked through Hardy's Facebook friends before landing upon Ezra's name.
"What are you up too?" I muttered under my breath. His photo was him flexing in front of the Statue of Liberty, his information bar was visible but his likes and dislikes went hidden. He never filled any of that stuff out. I eventually found an address for his possible current home.
"Aria..." I heard Spencer's voice from the other side of the door. I was already up from my bed, running around my room looking for a suitcase. The door opened slowly to reveal a confused Spencer. "What's going on?" She smiled, I only caught it for a moment before she snapped back to a frown.
"I'm going to New York." I decided I wouldn't beat around the bush. I wanted to see Ezra, and for all I knew this was the only chance I had, I wouldn't fuck it up like I had oh so many moons ago. She narrowed her eyes at me.
"What's in New York?" She questioned, I fumbled around with the mountain of clothes.
"Ezra is." I murmured quietly, her face contorted into an even bigger frown, she was going to tell me off.
"Ar...you can't be serious.." I scoffed at her. "Aria, he hasn't lived in New York for at least two years." My fumbling stopped, what was she talking about?
"How do you know that?" I turned my head towards her and she shrugged.
"Hardy and Ezra don't talk anymore, but when they did Ezra was moving to California, and they just lost touch. Ezra doesn't respond to his emails or anything. I do know that he was moving to Los Angeles back then." I nodded.
"Are you in for a road trip?" She smiled, smugly at my question.
"We leave tomorrow morning. You'll need a companion. I'm going to go pack and buy plane tickets." I nodded again with a smile on my face. "It's nice to see a genuine smile on your face again." She cooed, before walking back to the kitchen and getting on her laptop. I heard her tell the girls and Hardy our plan. After 20 minutes of them claiming it was a terrible idea, they agreed but Hardy and Spencer made an agreement that he would tag along.
The Next Morning
We boarded our plane around 9:45. Spencer and Hardy were sitting across the aisle from me, one row back. The car ride hadn't been long. We had to drive to Philadelphia then fly on a five hour flight to Los Angeles. We were about three hours in when the elderly woman, who reeked of flowers was snoring, was murmuring apologies to some guy named Edmond as she snoozed. I could hear Spencer and Hardy yell-whispering at each other.
"How am I supposed to let her embarrass herself like that?" I narrowed my eyebrows at Spencer's comment.
"I didn't want either of you to know. Spence, you know that would destroy her. Especially the day she said she was planning to see him...She would've reached her breaking point." Hardy reasoned. I knew for whatever reason that he was right.
"Hardy, Aria needs to get over him. She has somebody in her life now, and he likes her. He might even love her by the end of the week. The point is, if you just tell her, we can have a nice trip in California and she could get over him." Spencer wasn't getting anywhere, and after hearing a tid-bit of Hardy's side of the argument, I was almost certain I didn't want to know.
The rest of the plane ride, I let my imagination run a muck. I didn't want it to, but I couldn't help it. Whatever Hardy didn't bother to tell Spencer before we were on the plane, was definitely anything but good. It was described as something that would break me, listening in didn't only make me want to know what they were talking about, but what to be prepared for. The plane landed around four o'clock. We drove twenty minutes to the hotel that Spencer had booked last minute. The only problem was that Spencer only booked one room, so someone would have to be demoted to the floor.
"Aria, we can share the bed." I nodded with a blank expression, I wanted to skip the commentary and just find out what they were all keeping from me.
"Okay, I'm just gonna take a shower and talk to Ezra.." All the color in Spencer's face drowned. She was as pale as I was. Hardy interjected.
"Uh-that's cool. We'll print out the directions for you!" I nodded and went into the bathroom. I was in desperate need to a shower. I reeked of whatever flower perfume the elderly woman was wearing on the plane. I paraded into the bathroom with my suitcase in tow.
After my shower, I sorted through all of my clothes I had decided on a pair of light wash capris, an off white t-shirt and a sea foam green scarf with floral print. I curled my hair into loose curls and did my makeup naturally. I slipped on my grey sandals. The air in California was stuffy. It wasn't hot, but it wasn't cold. And for November in Pennsylvania, it was almost never like this.
"All printed out, here's your purse." Hardy handed me my purse and the directions and I smiled politely. I walked down to the rental car that Veronica got for us. Before starting the car, I pulled out my phone and texted Riley.
I'm here and safe. Exploring with Spencer.
I locked my phone and started the car, carefully following the directions. I came upon a house with bright green grass. It was a baby blue and off white color that almost matched my shirt. I smiled slightly, this was the home Ezra and I talked about briefly before his reveal as...A. I let out a breath that I didn't know I was holding in.
All I was there to do was to get an explanation, yet I couldn't even open the car door. My phone vibrated in my pocket.
Have fun babe. Xoxo.
I rolled my eyes at the last part of the text. Swallowing hard, I got out of the car and walked towards the two story house that held my only love. I walked up the three steps and onto the porch. Holding my breath, I lightly knocked on the door. I heard tiny footsteps pitter-patter and then the knob finally turned. My breath hitched in my throat.
"Hi! I'm Marley!" A petite girl with golden curls down to her back stood at the threshold, before I could say anything I heard a familiar voice make their way around the corner.
"Marley, how many times have I told you-Aria?"
And just like that, I understood Spencer and Hardy's argument.