A/N So here's my short go at little sad times, see how we roll. Thought it was time to see Callie looking out for her girl. As always all mistakes are my own, I own nothing. Feel free to throw any suggestions my way, comments and review are most welcome, but mostly I hope you enjoy and thank you for reading =)
After all that had been happening at work Arizona was trying desperately not to let things get to her, she had promised herself that she was not allowed to go crazy for at least the time while Callie was pregnant, but she couldn't seem to hold it off much longer. Bad memories and nightmares were creeping in of what happened with Callie and Sofia years ago. In some of the past nights she had woken during the middle of the night in a cold sweat and only to then frantically check to make sure Callie was beside her, most nights when this happened she would also sneak off into Sofia's room and sit for hours making sure that she was alive and breathing and that her nightmares were nothing more than just that, nightmares. Callie knew Arizona was still heavily affected by what had happened but didn't know exactly how often her wife would wake from bad dreams and Arizona tried her best to keep it that way.
She had finished work and headed home, meaning to do some laundry and perhaps warming up some left overs for dinner, Sofia was next door at Marks until the next morning and Callie was not home for a few hours yet, leaving Arizona to her own thoughts.
The past few weeks had been hectic outside of work and at work something's had gone from bad to worse, several premature babies in the ICU had not survived and she had to deal with the grieving parents most days… not a good thing for a mum to-be.
Arizona had seated herself on the couch and just sitting in silence for who knows how long, as she sat there the tears began to roll down her face, she tried to wipe them away but they just kept on rolling down, she couldn't fight back the crazy any longer, she moved her legs up and hugged her knees tightly into her chest.
"I can't do this…I'm going to screw something up again…I can't do this" she muttered to herself in between sobs.
"I can't be one of those parents… I can't go through it again" She continues, not noticing the front door being unlocked and opening.
"Hey, I'm home" Callie's voice echoes through the dark lightless house "babe?... Arizona…? You here?"
Callie places her keys on the table and flicks on some lights, then notices the blond on the couch curled up.
"Hey Arizona…?" She makes her way over to the curled up woman "Are you ok? Did you have a bad day?"
Arizona barley noticing Callie's presence just looks straight ahead and repeats her mutterings "I can't do this…I'm going to screw this up… I'm going to do something…I can't go through anything like that again…"
"Hey wow...what are you talking about?" the worry in Callie's voice breaks Arizona out of her trance.
"So many kids die… every day in my PEDS ward, I have to tell their parents that their child is gone." Callie can see the fear emanating out of the blue eyes before her.
"All I see in my dreams are those tiny coffins. Last time you were pregnant … I sent you through the front windscreen of my car" She looks at Callie's growing and now rather prominent belly "I am so afraid I'm going to do something to stuff this up" now turning away from Callie in shame.
"It was an accident, and I'm fine and I'm here and so is our perfectly healthy daughter, you are not going to do anything to stuff anything up, I'm scared too" She tried to emphasise with her.
"Remember the day they let Sofia and I go home, remember the freak out I had? And what Baily said? I was afraid because I was a parent and you're afraid because of the same reason, you are a mother Arizona"
"And what about all the kids that live because you were the to help them?" Callie places her arm around the still curled up woman.
"How do you know Calliope? How are you so sure I'm not going to suck at this? Or hurt you or our child?" panic filling Arizona's voice.
She knew that at one point or another Arizona was going to freak out and she was going to have to be her rock and hold her together before it was her turn when the child arrived, taking a breath Callie placed her hand on the pale cheek of her wife and turned her head so they were eye to eye.
"I know because you love me and I love you… and none of the rest matters. I know because you are a good man in a storm, you are my good man in a storm. I know because you and Sofia have an amazing unbreakable bond. And I know because you are the love of my life and I trust you with every inch of my being and you would never let anything happen to me or our baby or our family…"
After a few moments Callie's words had sunk in the blond replied, "How do you know about being a good man in a storm?"
Callie lets a little smile break through "Because my father would never let me be with anyone who was any less than a good man in a storm" thinking back to their wedding day, and the dance to which her father told her about Arizona's speech to him. "Now I thought I'm the one who's supposed to be crazy here?"
"I'm sorry, I've been trying for it to not get to me and be strong…but I…just…I…" Arizona starts to sob again and leans into Callie's neck.
"Hey it's ok, it all gets to us." She reassures her wife, while reaching for her phone, she quickly texts a message to Mark ^Hey bring Sof over in 30 and grab some donuts, had a rough day. Love Cal^ she presses send and tosses the phone back into her bag.
"Come on lets go up stairs, change into some comfy clothes and have some family snuggle time, ok?" Arizona still sobbing quietly into Callie's neck "It will be worth it I promise" the taller woman slowly helps her wife up and they escort each other up the stairs to their bed room. Not long after Callie had helped clean up Arizona and both slipped into more comfortable sleep wear, Mark quietly knocked on the bedroom door.
"Hey someone is here for some mummy snuggle time"
"Mamma?" comes Sofia's little voice.
Callie moves to open the door as Arizona shuffles on to the bed.
"Mummy" Sofia beams up at her mummy as she opens the door.
"Hey Sofs, you say night nights to daddy?" Callie asks as she hugs her daughter, who then turns to hug Mark "Lwove yous daddwy"
"Love you too Sofs, now go look after your mamma" He kisses her on the check, as she turns and scurries over to the bed.
"Mark thanks for this, I know it's you night with her and all-"quietly cut off by the tall man.
"No problems, we all have our bad days, the donuts are in the kitchen, if you need anything else I will be down stairs occupying your couch. We can all have breakfast in the morning, my treat" he sends Callie a reassuring smile before he closes the door and heads back down the stairs.
The dark haired woman smiles just a little at how much Mark has grown as a person since the accident, how he has tried so hard to be a good father Sofia and actually getting along with Arizona trying to see things from her point of view. With that comforting thought she climbs into the bed with Sofia nestle between bot her mamma and mummy.
"Hey, we are all going to get through this together ok? Look we're all here; we are all ok, see?" Callie tries to comfort the smaller woman.
Sofia places a sleepy hand to her Mamma's cheek and wiggles her way closer, Arizona smiles just a little and helps the small child snuggle into her, looking over at the deep chocolate eyes of the Latina.
"I love you Calliope, and I'm so sorry"
"I love you too Arizona, try and sleep, Sofia will keep you safe" Callie grabs one of Arizona's hands and then places it on her swelling belly "we'll all keep you safe. We're going to do this together"
"I wills hewlps you mamma" A sleepy Sofia mumbles into her mamma's neck.
Callie gently strokes the blond tendrils with her free hand looking into the deep crystal blue eyes across from her, slowly they close their eyes and the breathing from both the blond woman and tiny human become slow and even, Callie now closes her own eyes knowing her family is now safely sleeping in her arms.