Disclaimer: written for a challenge by the originalkillerpineapple

Must contain the letter 'e'.

Must include the phrase 'I am the dark lord of tap!'

Should mention/ contain the song 'Gay Bar'.

Should include an unexpected career path.

Must include either one of the drinking games taught to us by Mr Hall or the game he stopped those at Chris' party from playing.

Must include a pairing with Severus and another character of your choice.

Must include a trip to a fairground or some other such establishment.

At least three characters should wink during the fic.

Should be set once Harry's generation have left Hogwarts, although it can be any distance into the future.

Should include an argument which Severus blames on sunglasses.

6 years later

'Tell us a story! Tell us a story'

'Ok, fine, any preferences?'

'Hogwarts! We want a story about HOGWARTS!!!'

'Fine, fine. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin.

Long ago, there was a boy called…well, called…Draco. Now Draco was a special child…now Teddy, don't wink I didn't mean it like that. Where was I? Oh yes, Draco was a special child, in that he was a wizard- '

'That isn't at all special!'

'Well, now it is! He was SPECIAL because he was a WIZARD and that is final! And one day, the population of Hogwarts – Teddy SIT DOWN – decided to take the students to a fairground.

And so, one day, at the height of June, the staff, ex-pupils and current pupils all crowded into the fairground- '

'What was the fair called?'

'What? Why on Earth should that matter? Oh, well, fine, the fairground was called 'Inane Questions Pier''

'Inane Questions Pier? How STUPID a name is that?!?'

'Well that's what it's called so sit down and shut up or I shant continue the story. So, they all went to Inane Questions Pier, and began to find their favourite rides. Now, Draco decided to go on the…the log flume, and so off he and some of his friends went. Now, on his way to the log flume, he heard Headmaster Snape arguing with Professor Sprout. There was much shouting and gesturing, and some muttering about poisons and evening cocktails before he finally ended it by crying 'If you weren't wearing those hideous sunglasses this never would've been an issue' and off he sashayed, leaving Sprout gaping in confusion behind him. Now-'

'That's a stupid argument to have.'

'It is based on fact so silence child! NOW, because the log flume was rather boring, Draco went off to…some other ride that was much cooler than a log flume. And on his way, he passed Snape and his special friend (NOW you may wink Teddy), tucked away on the Tunnel of Love.

As the day ran on, Draco went on many fun rides and stored many happy memories of the day away for later use. And, as darkness drew ever closer, the older visitors went on to a nearby club-'

'What was the club called?'

'Oh…eerm…Lemon Sugar. Now, as the doors to the club opened, a song assaulted their ears-'

'What song?'

'Well I don't know do I? Gay Bar. By Electric Six. A song assaulted their ears, so they sat down in the far corner by the pool-'

'What sort of a club has a pool?'

'Well this one, obviously. They sat down by the pool, and became steadily more and more drunk. They began playing drinking games, where they had to balance brooms upon their noses and spin round, amongst others. Now one Slytherin, by the name of Blaise, thought it would be a clever idea to go swimming, and almost drowned himself in the process. So they took him to hospital, the end.'

'That's it? That was the whole story?'

'Yes, now shut up and go to sleep.'

'Uncle Harry?'

'Yes, Teddy?'

'What happened to Draco?'

'What do you mean, what happened to him? He got married! To me!'

'Why did you get married?'

At this, Draco walked into the room to say goodnight.

'You told him about the fairground I take it?'

'Yup.' Harry smiled.

'Weeeeeeeeeeeell' Draco told Teddy 'it all began when we 'took a ride' down the Tunnel of Love' Harry and Draco winked.

'Now, goodnight Teddy and behave or we wont let you come see the show tomorrow night.'

'What show?'

'I'm the lead role! I'm the Dark Lord of Tap!'