Hello! I have been watching Mad About You for a while now, and I was annoyed that Lisa wasn't in Season 6 at all and that certain other characters just dropped off the map. I also was annoyed that they didn't show Nat and Arley on their first date after making a big deal of them liking each other, so I decided to write it. This is my first fanfiction for this show, so I hope I have the characters written okay. Anyhow, without further ado, here is Nat & Arley's First Date.
"Hey there, ho there," Nat said, coming into the apartment. Paul's head shot up from the VCR where he was taking his film out from watching it. He had been going over footage.
"Nat!" he said, excited, moving over to him. "So?"
"So?" Nat asked, confused.
"How did it go last night?"
"Last night?"
"Yes! With you and Arley. Did you talk?" Paul pressed.
"Oh yes! There was some talking," Nat nodded. "Some likes and dislikes may have been shared."
"Could you elaborate please?" Paul asked.
"Well, Mr. Buchman, I...I confessed my feelings," Nat answered.
"You did?! That's great!"
"Yes, yes it is."
"So now what?" Paul asked. Oh Jamie was gonna be so excited!
"Now what? Oh, um, well, er, you see I'm not so much good with planning a date," Nat confessed.
"I can certainly help with that," Paul told him.
"You can?"
"Yes! I'm the date master, you could say."
"Oh! That's great! What do you suggest?"
"Well..."
"Hi, Nat!" Jamie called, coming in from the bedroom suddenly. "What's going on? What are we talking about?"
"Nat taking Arley on their first date!" Paul exclaimed.
"Oh how wonderful!" Jamie cried. "Where are you taking her?"
"Well you see, that's what Mr. Buchman was about to tell me," Nat answered, rubbing his head. "Since he is the date master and all."
"Date master?" Jamie asked, laughing. "Really?"
"Let it go," Paul muttered. Jamie just rolled her eyes and shook her head at him.
"What's your big idea?" she asked, crossing her arms and squinting at him.
"Well," Paul started. He scratched his neck. Why did she always put him on the spot like that? "Well, um. Riff's! You could take her to Riff's restaurant." He gave Jamie a "ha" look.
"What about a candlelit dinner at a fancier restaurant?" Jamie suggested. Nat looked between them.
"They, uh, both sound like such good ideas," he said, twisting his hands. "Let me, uh, go ponder them over. Come on, Murray! There's my fluffy partner. There's a good boy." Murray trotted over to Nat, wagging his tail eagerly. Nat clipped on the leash, and they both walked out the door.
"Date master?" Jamie asked again once they were gone.
"It sounded good at the time," Paul sighed.
...
"Date master has a great ring to it," Ira said. "I would've said the same thing." Jamie had gone to work, and Ira stopped by to mooch off their kitchen as per usual.
"Thank you! That's what I was thinking," Paul responded.
"You sure you want your babysitter and your dog walker dating, though?" Ira asked.
"Why not?"
"Well, they might both quit on you. You know, fall in love and decide they wanna get married and move on with their lives. You could be shooting yourself in the foot here, my friend," Ira commented, taking a bite out of his sandwich.
"Uh huh, uh huh, but you see, they'd be happy, and I'm...I'm all right with that," Paul finished.
"Right now you are," Ira laughed. "Wait until you can't go out cos you don't have a babysitter."
"Isn't that what loving family members are for?" Paul asked, giving him a look. Ira just laughed in return.
...
Jamie was back home, and Paul was now out doing some work setting up for his next film, The Making of the Making of Titanic. After the success of Buchman, Paul was flying high. Mabel was down for a nap, and Jamie was on a mission to create Nat the perfect date for Arley. Then the door buzzer went off, repeatedly.
"Why does she have to do that?" Jamie muttered to herself, walking to the door. She opened it to find Lisa leaning on the frame.
"Hey!" she said, coming in. "Long time no see!"
"I know. I thought maybe you'd left America altogether," Jamie commented.
"Whatcha doin?" Lisa asked, going over to the table and seeing Jamie's list.
"Trying to make the perfect date for Nat and Arley," Jamie answered, moving to take it before Lisa could. Too late.
"Fancy restaurants? Moonlit walk? Kiss under the stars? Ugh, I feel like I'm watching a sad movie," Lisa said, tossing the paper down.
"It's a sweet date for two sweet people," Jamie responded.
"Nat is the cute dog walker, right?"
"Yes."
"You can't let him date Arley," Lisa declared.
"Why not?!"
"Because I like Nat! A lot," Lisa added.
"Since when have you liked Nat?" Jamie demanded.
"Since now," Lisa answered.
"But...you can't," Jamie said. "He's with Arley."
"For now," Lisa scoffed.
"You can't just decide you like someone because they started dating someone else!" Jamie cried.
"Says who?"
"Says the world!" Jamie answered dramatically, getting frustrated.
"Yea, right," Lisa laughed. "Now, are you gonna help me or not?"
"No! If you'll excuse me, I have to check on Mabel," Jamie said. She had to get out of the living room before she punched her sister in the face.
"Sure. Use your daughter as an excuse not to talk to me!" Lisa called after her. She fluffed her hair. What was the big deal anyway? Murray trotted out from the bedroom and hopped onto the couch, watching her.
"Don't tell Nat what I said," Lisa instructed the dog.
Later
"Your sister likes Nat?" Paul asked Jamie.
"Apparently," Jamie answered, rushing around trying to find Mabel's socks.
"Lisa likes Nat?"
"You repeating it isn't going to change it," Jamie said, lying on her stomach and reaching under the couch. Mabel was getting very crafty at hiding her socks.
"I just don't...help me understand this," Paul finished.
"What's there to understand? Lisa decided she liked Nat after hearing he liked someone else. It's so grade school, which her therapist should have told her, by the way," Jamie muttered.
"So, has she talked to Nat? Like ever?"
"Not that I'm aware of," Jamie answered. She sat up onto her haunches, surveying the living room.
"I just don't-"
"Understand. I heard you the first time," Jamie cut him off. She went over to her desk and began lifting papers, still looking.
"Well, you'll be glad to know that I have the perfect date idea for Nat," Paul said proudly. He was leaning against the kitchen table, watching her.
"Really," Jamie said. Where were the wretched socks?!
"Yup. He's gonna rent a horse and carriage and go through Central Park," Paul told her. Jamie finally looked at him.
"Are you serious?"
"Yes! It's old school but very sweet. I thought you'd like that," Paul added.
"Isn't it a little too old fashioned? What's wrong with the candlelit dinner?"
"Nothing. I just thought it would be fitting for Nat," Paul shrugged. He made a mental note to cancel the carriage ride he had planned for the next evening for Jamie.
"Would you help me?" Jamie asked finally. She was going insane.
"What are you looking for?"
"Mabel's socks. I took them off to clip her toe nails, and now I can't find them."
"You mean these?" Paul asked, showing her. He had been holding them the entire time.
"You watched me turn this place upside down and didn't think to tell me you had them?" Jamie demanded.
"I didn't know you were looking for them. I saw them on the ground and picked them up," Paul explained. She snatched them from his hands, giving him an annoyed look before going to to their room to put them back on Mabel.
"So anyway," Paul said, continuing, following her to the bedroom. "Do you think Nat will like the idea?"
"I don't know, Paul."
"He loves Murray. That makes him an animal lover," Paul demonstrated.
"Uh huh."
"I'm sensing you think my idea is stupid," Paul noted.
"It's not your greatest," Jamie admitted. Paul sighed.
"Well, then I'm out of ideas."
"Don't worry. I can't think of any either. I think Nat is just going to have to figure this one out on his own," Jamie told him.
"You're right," Paul agreed. Their buzzer sounded, and he headed to answer.
"Hi," Arley said, coming inside when he opened the door.
"A-A-Arley," Paul stuttered. Jamie came out from the bedroom holding Mabel.
"Hi, Arley," she smiled. "Just in time."
"Is Paul all right?" Arley asked, concerned. "He seems afraid of me suddenly."
"He does that with me sometimes," Jamie answered, trying to cover for Paul.
"I see."
"So, have you talked to Nat since...you know," Jamie prodded.
"Not yet. I feel like he's going to take back what he said," Arley lamented.
"Oh, I don't know about that," Jamie smiled. She had arranged for Nat to walk Murray while Arley was babysitting that evening. Paul was still standing in the doorway looking confused.
"Come on, honey," she said, pulling on his arm. "We're going on a date."
"O-o-okay," he stammered. Jamie gave Arley an "I told you so" look. Arley nodded in response, understanding. Once they were out the door, Paul turned to Jamie.
"What are you doing?"
"Making it happen," Jamie answered. "What better time to have a first date?"
"While she's looking after our daughter?"
"You'll see," Jamie promised. It was a perfect, fool proof plan. She just had Lisa to worry about.
...
"You're being ridiculous," Ira said to Lisa while they were at Riff's, eating.
"I'm not! I like Nat! Why does everyone keep saying I don't?" she pouted.
"Because you don't! You're reaching because you're still single," Ira pointed out.
"Not true," Lisa argued. It was in fact so true. She was beginning to think she'd never meet anyone.
"Look, Nat is off limits. Deal with it," Ira snorted. Lisa glared at him. Suddenly, Paul and Jamie showed up.
"Oh, hey!" Paul called, seeing them. They joined the table. Ursula was there instantly.
"Now, will you be having what they're having?" she asked in her usual ditzy way.
"No, I want a chicken sandwich," Paul instructed.
"Just water," Jamie said to her. Ursula stared.
"You know the chicken is already dead, right? You don't have to give it water," she snorted. Everyone stared at her. She laughed to herself and walked away.
"Does she have a brain in there at all do you suppose?" Paul asked.
"Probably not," Jamie answered.
"Why can't I like Nat?!" Lisa shouted, wanting the attention back onto herself.
"Because you don't really like him you're just jealous," Jamie told her.
"Nuh uh!"
"Yes, you are," Ira chimed in. "I bet you anything that you see another guy you fancy and you'll jump onto liking him."
"Nuh uh!" Lisa repeated indignantly.
"Prove it," Jamie ordered.
"Fine," Lisa snapped. She stood up. "I'll go prove it right now." She stomped out of the building.
"So," Ira said, not affected at all by Lisa's exit. "How's 'The Making of the Making of the Titanic' going?"
"Ugh, not so good," Paul answered. Jamie tuned them both out. Out of all the films Paul was doing, this one seemed to be the dullest. Why make a film about the making of something? It seemed odd. Then suddenly, things got interesting.
"Hey!" They all swiveled to see Selby standing there beaming at them.
"Selby!" Paul shouted, jumping up to hug him. "Where the hell have you been?!"
"Hi, Jamie," Selby said, giving her a hug next. "Ira." He nodded at him.
"Selby, answer me," Paul commanded. Selby sat down with them.
"Well, to be honest, I left because I couldn't stand being rejected by Lisa," Selby answered. Jamie gasped in shock.
"Wh-what?" Paul stuttered. "You...you were...you."
"Yes," Selby finished for him. "Remember when she asked me to pretend to be her boyfriend for your parents?" Jamie nodded. "Well, I fell for her, but she didn't return my feelings. I couldn't stand being around her when I felt so strongly for her, you know? I skipped town. I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye."
"Well," Paul started. "Well...you...well."
"Honey, use your big people's words," Jamie instructed. Ira snickered.
"I'm sure you were mad at me," Selby offered.
"No," Paul denied. "Not at all! I was just surprised is all. You love Lisa?!"
"Loved," Selby corrected. "I'm not anymore. I got over her. Being away did me good."
"I see," Paul mused.
"All right, I give up," Lisa said, coming back inside. "There is no man out there that I want other than Nat." She stopped short when she saw Selby.
"Oh my God," Selby muttered.
"Look who's back!" Jamie cried, trying to start conversation again.
"Selby," Lisa snorted. "Yea right."
"Why don't we go look for a man together," Jamie suggested, jumping up. She dragged Lisa out the door. When they were gone, Selby turned to Paul.
"Oh no," Paul said, recognizing that look.
"I'm still in love with her," Selby told him, right on cue.
"Damn it," Paul muttered to himself.
...
"Hey there," Nat said, seeing Arley. Murray trotted over to him.
"Hi," Arley said back. Mabel was cooing in the background.
"So, uh, I'm here to walk Mr. Murray," Nat said, laughing nervously.
"Mind if I join you? I'm sure Mabel would like an outing," Arley added. Nat practically beamed at her. This was it! Their first date! It was so simple! Why hadn't he thought of that before? Go for a walk. Easy as pie.
"I would love it if you could join us," Nat answered. Smiling, Arley got Mabel ready to go in the stroller, and together they walked out the door.
So I'm not sure if anyone wants a second chapter or not. I could end it here and you all assume Selby took off again, or I could extend the drama of Selby and Lisa a bit more and give it a proper conclusion. I will leave that up to you to decide. Thanks for reading!