A/N: Posting this separately because it's a fluff fic and I just thought about it... What if the other three talked to Gon about... something he thinks is candy? Read my first fic, Enchanting Monsoon, for you to get this one (this short fic is based from a scene in that fic. hihi). It's pure humor - I'd hope. I was trying to be funny but my humor is kinda off at that time but please do tell me if it's funny. I'll do better in comedy, then! XD
WARNING: Contains a topic not appropriate for children under innocent rationality (like Gon ^_~)
DISCLAIMER: The lovely characters belong to Yoshihiro Togashi who is coming back with new volumes of Hunter X Hunter this December!
MAN TO MAN TALK
What Leorio told Gon about what he saw when he was at the store with Kurapika.
Leorio, Gon, and Killua were sitting on the floor in their living room apartment in York Shin while Kurapika was on the couch, listening to their so-called 'man to man' talk. The blonde was there mainly to limit Leorio of his words. The doctor might spill out something he would have a hard time explaining especially to a naïve Gon. Kurapika, the intelligent, walking encyclopedia who can practically explain everything under the sun had a hard time telling Gon about… these things… 'older people use.' He didn't know why. He just doesn't like those kinds of topics. They weren't his beat. Luckily, Leorio and Killua… well, LUCKILY. The Kuruta just prays this 'talk' won't injure Gon's innocent mind. It's information anyway. He ought to know.
Leorio was holding a thick book on anatomy.
Leorio: Now, Gon, what exactly did you see at the store?
Gon: colourful boxes with square sachets in them. Each box has a different flavour: strawberry, mango, there's even chocolate! So I think I'd–
Leorio: Gon, what do you think it is?
Kurapika: Leorio…
Leorio: Take it easy, Kurapika. Gon?
Gon: …Uh… Candy?
Killua laughed and rolled on the floor.
Leorio: *smiles* Okay, Gon. First, that is not candy. Second, when you see that thing in a store, ignore it, don't look at it, don't point at it – unless you're at legal age. And third, that is a condom. A condom. Con-dom.
Kurapika: You don't have to say it thrice.
Gon: Con… dom?
Kurapika's heart fell. Ugh. The innocent Gon. Poor thing.
Leorio: Yes, that is what it's called.
Gon: What's it for?
Leorio was opening his book.
Kurapika: Lose the book, Leorio.
Leorio: But this makes things easier.
Kurapika: *sighs and closes eyes* No, because he was only asking what it is for.
Leorio: *sighs in defeat* Fine. Gon, it's for us, guys – men, males, kings of the jung–
Kurapika cleared his throat.
Leorio sneered.
Killua keeps laughing.
Gon: *tilts his head* That's why Kurapika said it wasn't for children! He said it's for people older than children, like him and you!
Killua laughed even more.
Kurapika choked on his breathing and coughed.
Leorio: *laughed and reached for Kurapika and patted his back* Kurapika, don't tell me you–
Kurapika: I had to end the conversation.
Leorio: There are other ways to end a conversation.
Kurapika: Just to be clear; first, we were at a store, a public place, secondly, yes I did not know what to say to Gon and lastly, I would never attempt or even use that… kind of thing. I don't have to.
Killua: *recovers* And if you have to?
Kurapika: I have no reason to do so.
Killua: Fair enough.
Gon: Ne, ne what's it for?
Leorio: It's for when you… don't want a baby.
Killua: Geez, he'll ask more if that's what you'll tell him.
Gon: Why don't you want to have a baby?
Leorio: Because of… reasons. Hehe. Hehehe. *nervous laugh, looking around, cold sweat*
Gon: How come only men use it? Is it a medicine?
Killua laughed again, rolling on the floor.
Leorio: …Er… No, it's not a medicine. It's because you put in on a male's body part, that's why. *continues to smile nervously and wishes he was out of there*
Gon: Which one?
Leorio: …D-Down there…
Kurapika: I thought doctors are supposed to be straightforward people? *devilishly handsome evil smirk*
Leorio: *regrets everything* I-I don't know. It wasn't on the script.
Gon: *thinking that Leorio meant 'men's feet'* Ne, Leorio, but why does it have to have flavours?
Leorio: …O_O… *wishes he was never even born*
Killua was still laughing, ladies and gentlemen.
Kurapika: Not so easy now, huh? *mentally grinning*
Gon's face was full of curiosity.
Leorio fainted.
MAN TO MAN TALK. END.
A/N: See? Told ya.. FLUFF. Hahahaha! But please do review. Please do! Thank you for reading! XD
