To Sneeze Perchance to Dream
The 1st Sneeze on "Will&Grace" goes wrong!
Disclaimer: "Will & Grace" is a production of Everything Entertainment in association with
NBC Studios/Three Sisters Entertainment. The show, the characters, the catch-phrases do not
belong to me. No infringement intended. The only association I have is a deep seeded affection
for the above - especially one Karen W. and one Jack M. So Do Enjoy!
And Do give some feedback, honey!
Karen sat at her desk with her head buried in her hands. "Nooooooo," she began to
whine softly. "Noooooo," she whined a bit louder while shaking her head still in her
hands. "NO!" she flung her head back to meet Grace's frightened face.
"What? What's wrong?!" Grace took a quick look around for any sign of trouble.
With the back of her hand, Karen persuaded a wisp of hair away from her face. After
a heavy sigh, she released on final "Augh!" She dropped her head and her right shoulder.
Soon she was revealing a container of her favorite "morning beverage". Karen looked
around the desk and in the drawers for ANYTHING to pour it into. She finally gave up
and just drank straight from the bottle. After regaining composure and straightening
every tight piece of clothing, she began to explain, "It's Stan. He wants me to spend
more F. Q. T. with the kids." She stuck out her tongue as if she was going to be sick.
"F. Q. T.?" Grace was looking through a book of swatches. She lost interest after the
word "Stan".
Karen rolled her eyes "Family Quality Time, Grace. Honey, where have you been?"
Grace chose to ignore the last comment. "Stanley's already signed me up for some field
trip with the fat one's class. Something about a museum, history ..." Karen began to
twirl her hand above her head as if she was actually trying to recall Stan's words, but
dropped her wrist "... blah, blah, blah."
Grace smiled at Karen's somewhat predictability. "I use to love field trips when I was
in grade school."
Karen's you-would-look suddenly changed to a ray of hope. "Grace?" she asked in a
softer manner.
"Mmm-hmm?"
Karen made her way to the coffeepot, "How would you like to go on this field trip?"
Grace laughed appreciatively, "Karen! That would defeat the entire purpose of you
'F. Q. T.'" She ended her sentence imitating quotation marks in the air with her
fingers.
Her now buzzed secretary took the "quotation marks" and pulled them down. "Aw,
come on, honey. No one will ever know! All I have to do is bribe the boy with a little
sweet somethin', somethin'. And if the bald one ever found out, I would just have to give
him a little somethin', somethin'." Karen began bouncing up and down while mouthing silent
Pleases.
"No," Grace answered firmly. "Maybe you need to spend some quality time with thos kids,
Karen. It might do you some good."
Karen flopped down in her chair defeated and gave Grace a piercing glare of repugnance.
"Hmm. Good. You don't know what good is," she mumbled. "What can those kids give me
that's any good?"
"Love."
"Oh, don't pull that love crap on me, Grace!" She removed a compact and a tube of
lipstick from her purse. "If anything, those little brats are preparing for my
utter destruction. Why just the other night, I found the girl in my closet trying on
my clothes. What if she had found my Chanel slingblacks? Huh? That's love, Grace -
Chanel slingbacks. Not sticky, chocolate finger prints on my lingerie!" She finally
apllied her lipstick. As she popped the lipstick back into her purse, her mind was
recalling her last sentence, "Although, I suppose they get that from their father."
Karen gave Grace another try with a questioning look.
Grace shook her head "My answer is still 'No.'"
Suddenly, Jack flounced into the room unannounced, but before he could greet the
woemn with a witty remark, he noticed Karen's unusually perturbed grimace. "Why
so glum, Kare Bear?"
Her devious little mind was working quickly this morning. Sadly, she looked up into
Jack's eyes and pouted. He took Karen's hands in compassion. At that moment, she knew
she had him - hook, line, and sucker!
~*~
A lady dressed in an uniformed blue skirt and jacket pointed out old things. A line of
children followed directly after. As she was ready to move on to the next exhibit, she
looked back t make sure everyone followed, but alas, the troublemaker in the group was
in the last corridor.
"Young man!" the tour guide was perturbed. "Excuse me, young man! Please, do not touch
the ... Please! Put down that Egyptian headdress! And tell your friend that those
bottles of bathtub gin are an exhibit - not a bar!"
Still in the 1920s exhibit, Jack placed the headdress on a mannequin of Al Capone.
"God, Karen, this is such a drab, dull, dusty place. I mean, is that woman blind?!
That headdress was perfect for me. Don't you think it brought out my baby blues?"
Taking a seat on "Capone's" lap, Karen took another shot of bathtub gin and sighed
disapprovingly "Jack, look at her. She doesn't even know that navy went out of style
so very long ago. We must ignore those less fortunate in fashion sense."
Jack slowly shambled towards the next exhibit while Karen staggered to catch up with
him. She gently touched him on the shoulder. "Hey, Poodle, did I thank you for coming
with me?" She was very sincere.
"No."
"Oh" Karen began looking around nervously. Jack knew she would never thank him audibly;
it was just her way. He knew she appreciated him. He just enjoyed being with her.
"Come on, honey! Let's go play some tricks on the kiddies!"
After a few moments of joyous jumping and gasping laughter, the two overgrown children
ran to catch up with their group in the "next decade".
Jack and Karen sneaked up behind the kids at the back of the group. Karen stood to the
right of one boy and tapped him on the left shoulder. She could not control her
giggling when the boy turned around to find no one there.
Meanwhile, Jack stopped at the old, dusty cathedral styled radio in the corner. He
mumbled somthing about Rosario making some extra cash and gathered a handful of dust.
All smiles, he ran to catch up with Karen, who was standing behind a pillar in the
museum waiting to trip the next kid to walk by. He was laughing uncontrollably,
"Kare... Kare... Kare Bear! I have this great idea!"
His laughter was contagious. Snickering, Karen asked, "Well? What is it?"
He opened his hand to reveal the dust. "I'll stand over there ... and you'll get one
of the kids ... and ... and ..." He could no longer talk in complete sentences. He
pointed to himself; then, he inhaled until his face swelled up like a blowfish.
Karen grasped Jack's idea and doubled over at the idea with a little help from Jack's
facial expression. Jack could not control himself. Before he knew it, he exhaled and
the dust went everywhere. A cloud encircled Karen's head.
Karen's face was distorted into many uncomfortable grimaces. Suddenly, relief came
with several high pitched sneezes. One directly after the other, she tried to keep
balance "...choo! ...choo! ...choo!" Finally, it was over "...CHOO!!"
Karen stumbled backwards, tumbled over a partition, and hit her head on a microphone
used in a World War II USO tour. She was out cold. Jack rushed to her side, but he
could do nothing to help her. Slowly, but surely, Karen slipped into a world
unfamiliar to her in may ways but so much like home, it was uncanny.
~*~
To Be Continued...
The 1st Sneeze on "Will&Grace" goes wrong!
Disclaimer: "Will & Grace" is a production of Everything Entertainment in association with
NBC Studios/Three Sisters Entertainment. The show, the characters, the catch-phrases do not
belong to me. No infringement intended. The only association I have is a deep seeded affection
for the above - especially one Karen W. and one Jack M. So Do Enjoy!
And Do give some feedback, honey!
Karen sat at her desk with her head buried in her hands. "Nooooooo," she began to
whine softly. "Noooooo," she whined a bit louder while shaking her head still in her
hands. "NO!" she flung her head back to meet Grace's frightened face.
"What? What's wrong?!" Grace took a quick look around for any sign of trouble.
With the back of her hand, Karen persuaded a wisp of hair away from her face. After
a heavy sigh, she released on final "Augh!" She dropped her head and her right shoulder.
Soon she was revealing a container of her favorite "morning beverage". Karen looked
around the desk and in the drawers for ANYTHING to pour it into. She finally gave up
and just drank straight from the bottle. After regaining composure and straightening
every tight piece of clothing, she began to explain, "It's Stan. He wants me to spend
more F. Q. T. with the kids." She stuck out her tongue as if she was going to be sick.
"F. Q. T.?" Grace was looking through a book of swatches. She lost interest after the
word "Stan".
Karen rolled her eyes "Family Quality Time, Grace. Honey, where have you been?"
Grace chose to ignore the last comment. "Stanley's already signed me up for some field
trip with the fat one's class. Something about a museum, history ..." Karen began to
twirl her hand above her head as if she was actually trying to recall Stan's words, but
dropped her wrist "... blah, blah, blah."
Grace smiled at Karen's somewhat predictability. "I use to love field trips when I was
in grade school."
Karen's you-would-look suddenly changed to a ray of hope. "Grace?" she asked in a
softer manner.
"Mmm-hmm?"
Karen made her way to the coffeepot, "How would you like to go on this field trip?"
Grace laughed appreciatively, "Karen! That would defeat the entire purpose of you
'F. Q. T.'" She ended her sentence imitating quotation marks in the air with her
fingers.
Her now buzzed secretary took the "quotation marks" and pulled them down. "Aw,
come on, honey. No one will ever know! All I have to do is bribe the boy with a little
sweet somethin', somethin'. And if the bald one ever found out, I would just have to give
him a little somethin', somethin'." Karen began bouncing up and down while mouthing silent
Pleases.
"No," Grace answered firmly. "Maybe you need to spend some quality time with thos kids,
Karen. It might do you some good."
Karen flopped down in her chair defeated and gave Grace a piercing glare of repugnance.
"Hmm. Good. You don't know what good is," she mumbled. "What can those kids give me
that's any good?"
"Love."
"Oh, don't pull that love crap on me, Grace!" She removed a compact and a tube of
lipstick from her purse. "If anything, those little brats are preparing for my
utter destruction. Why just the other night, I found the girl in my closet trying on
my clothes. What if she had found my Chanel slingblacks? Huh? That's love, Grace -
Chanel slingbacks. Not sticky, chocolate finger prints on my lingerie!" She finally
apllied her lipstick. As she popped the lipstick back into her purse, her mind was
recalling her last sentence, "Although, I suppose they get that from their father."
Karen gave Grace another try with a questioning look.
Grace shook her head "My answer is still 'No.'"
Suddenly, Jack flounced into the room unannounced, but before he could greet the
woemn with a witty remark, he noticed Karen's unusually perturbed grimace. "Why
so glum, Kare Bear?"
Her devious little mind was working quickly this morning. Sadly, she looked up into
Jack's eyes and pouted. He took Karen's hands in compassion. At that moment, she knew
she had him - hook, line, and sucker!
~*~
A lady dressed in an uniformed blue skirt and jacket pointed out old things. A line of
children followed directly after. As she was ready to move on to the next exhibit, she
looked back t make sure everyone followed, but alas, the troublemaker in the group was
in the last corridor.
"Young man!" the tour guide was perturbed. "Excuse me, young man! Please, do not touch
the ... Please! Put down that Egyptian headdress! And tell your friend that those
bottles of bathtub gin are an exhibit - not a bar!"
Still in the 1920s exhibit, Jack placed the headdress on a mannequin of Al Capone.
"God, Karen, this is such a drab, dull, dusty place. I mean, is that woman blind?!
That headdress was perfect for me. Don't you think it brought out my baby blues?"
Taking a seat on "Capone's" lap, Karen took another shot of bathtub gin and sighed
disapprovingly "Jack, look at her. She doesn't even know that navy went out of style
so very long ago. We must ignore those less fortunate in fashion sense."
Jack slowly shambled towards the next exhibit while Karen staggered to catch up with
him. She gently touched him on the shoulder. "Hey, Poodle, did I thank you for coming
with me?" She was very sincere.
"No."
"Oh" Karen began looking around nervously. Jack knew she would never thank him audibly;
it was just her way. He knew she appreciated him. He just enjoyed being with her.
"Come on, honey! Let's go play some tricks on the kiddies!"
After a few moments of joyous jumping and gasping laughter, the two overgrown children
ran to catch up with their group in the "next decade".
Jack and Karen sneaked up behind the kids at the back of the group. Karen stood to the
right of one boy and tapped him on the left shoulder. She could not control her
giggling when the boy turned around to find no one there.
Meanwhile, Jack stopped at the old, dusty cathedral styled radio in the corner. He
mumbled somthing about Rosario making some extra cash and gathered a handful of dust.
All smiles, he ran to catch up with Karen, who was standing behind a pillar in the
museum waiting to trip the next kid to walk by. He was laughing uncontrollably,
"Kare... Kare... Kare Bear! I have this great idea!"
His laughter was contagious. Snickering, Karen asked, "Well? What is it?"
He opened his hand to reveal the dust. "I'll stand over there ... and you'll get one
of the kids ... and ... and ..." He could no longer talk in complete sentences. He
pointed to himself; then, he inhaled until his face swelled up like a blowfish.
Karen grasped Jack's idea and doubled over at the idea with a little help from Jack's
facial expression. Jack could not control himself. Before he knew it, he exhaled and
the dust went everywhere. A cloud encircled Karen's head.
Karen's face was distorted into many uncomfortable grimaces. Suddenly, relief came
with several high pitched sneezes. One directly after the other, she tried to keep
balance "...choo! ...choo! ...choo!" Finally, it was over "...CHOO!!"
Karen stumbled backwards, tumbled over a partition, and hit her head on a microphone
used in a World War II USO tour. She was out cold. Jack rushed to her side, but he
could do nothing to help her. Slowly, but surely, Karen slipped into a world
unfamiliar to her in may ways but so much like home, it was uncanny.
~*~
To Be Continued...