The sound of the elevator opening would have startled the blonde woman sitting on the empty bench that was only occupied by her, if she had been attentive to it. She was not though. Her thoughts were a million miles away as she stared ahead, resting her chin on her hands, elbows on her thighs, leaving a red mark were they sat, and Eric noticed that the minute he stepped out of the elevator.
He had just seen Austin and Patty leave the Miami Dade building, and something told him, her reaction had something to do with them. Cases that involved children always got to her and Eric knew that. It was due to everything her parents put her through as a child. Her character was due to that. The way she closed herself up behind those walls that surrounded her heart, were due to that.
He walked over towards her and sat down slowly, his hand immediately going to her back, stroking the middle hoping to provide some form of comfort. They might not be together anymore, but they could still be there for each other, and even though the walls had gone up a bit after their split, they hadn't gone all the way up high. It was like the door was closed, but the window was still slightly ajar, letting that tiny ray of sunshine through, and Eric knew that their split was not because she was no longer attracted to him, or because there were no feelings involved anymore...but it was because of him. The way he had betrayed her trust, the way he had kept her in the dark. It was work related the latest issue, but still...to her, he had betrayed her. Hell he had to even investigate her and even though he would have protected her if he needed to, it still hurt her, and Eric knew that she needed her space. She needed to be away from him for a while.
'Hey' he whispered and Calleigh turned her head slowly to look at him, her blonde hair dropping from behind her back to her left side, as her eyes twinkled. They still held tears in them...tears that were still undecided whether to spill or remain.
'Hey' she choked back, forcing a smile.
'What happened?' he asked her still stroking her back 'Is it because of the kids?' he asked, wanting to let her see that he did have the tiniest idea of what could have gotten to her.
'Yeah' she replied almost in a whisper. She turned her head again, staring ahead 'Austin wanted to come home with me' she whispered.
'Oh' Eric whispered back 'What did you say?' he asked her.
She turned to look at him again then, resting the side of her face on one hand 'That I can't...because of this job' she replied with a shrug, and then she moved exhaling hard, resting her back against the back of the bench, Eric's arm still behind her, letting the back of her head lean against his arm. She needed some form of comfort right now even if she was not going to come out and tell him that, but she knew that Eric could see that, so really she didn't need to say the words.
'Why don't we go somewhere and talk?' Eric asked her, seeing as there were a lot of people passing by and he knew how much Calleigh hated people listening on her conversations, and then gossiping about them. Besides...this was a talk that was not appropriate at work. It had the potential to escalate and get elaborated and Eric knew that. He was actually hoping it would.
oooOOOooo
Eric opened the door to his house...their house. It used to be theirs, and Calleigh hadn't been here since their split. She had asked him to meet at the house, and Eric had immediately agreed, as they both drove their way in their own hummers. He waited for her outside, wanting to accompany her in, knowing it was a bit of a touchy subject, especially in the state that she was in.
He had watched her stare at the exterior of the house from next to her hummer, as she recalled her times in this house, and Eric knew that she was thinking about all of that. He knew her that much, and even if he didn't, the look in her eyes would have told him so.
She had smiled at him, as she slowly approached him, readjusting her bag on her shoulder, as her muscles tensed. She hadn't really planned on coming here, she wasn't sure if she was even prepared to face this house again, especially today. A child had gotten to her, and when her and Eric had been an item...there were those couple of moments were the thought had run through her mind, even though they hadn't been an item for years. She knew how much Eric would love to have his own family, and deep down she hoped she could be the one to give him that, so it was ironic to even come here and talk about such a matter.
Now she was standing here in what used to be their home, and yet...they weren't together anymore, and even though Calleigh knew she was the one who had taken that decision, it still hurts. It probably hurts even more to know that she had been the one to ruin it all...yet again!
She stopped a couple of steps inside, not too far from the entrance as she let herself getting hit by waves of emotions of being back in here again. Her eyes settled on the picture that was still standing on the white piece of furniture ahead of the entrance right under one of the huge windows this house offered. It was a picture of her and Eric, his arms wrapped around her as his chin settled on her shoulder. He had taken that picture himself and Calleigh closed her eyes and she swallowed hard the sudden lump that formed in her throat. The smile on both their faces showed just how happy the two of them were together.
Eric was standing behind her, his eyes on her, hands in his pockets as he watched her every move, every emotion. He knew that this was affecting her hard, and truth be told, he was almost expecting her to crumble. The tears that he had seen in her eyes earlier told him that that boy had gotten to her quite hard and now being here, in what used to be their home, getting washed with memories of them...
He walked past her then without saying a word and straight into the kitchen. She watched him opening the door of the refrigerator as she stood still in her spot and as she blinked this memory flashed in front of her eyes...
'Aaaa' she screamed, laughing at the same time, as they ran after each other in circles in the middle of the kitchen. She had stolen the last two grapes from his bowl.
They had come down into the kitchen for a quick bite after they had made love for the last two hours. Calleigh's stomach had all but growled and Eric had burst in a fit of giggles at the sound, so Calleigh had put on a white t-shirt of his and pulled up her hair in a cute ponytail and made her way downstairs barefoot. Eric had soon followed, finding her preparing two bowls of mixed fruit.
He wrapped his arms around her, settling them on the front, right on top of her navel as he bit playfully on her earlobe 'Why don't we have dessert in bed?' he asked her.
Calleigh chuckled as the rubble of his voice tickled her, causing goosebumps to surface on her delicious skin 'Mmm...I thought we had already' she replied with a huge smile upon her face.
'I'm still hungry' Eric replied with a shrug, that silly grin plastered all over his face.
'Then eat' she replied as she offered him one of the bowls.
'Here' Eric said snapping her out of the memory as he handed her a glass of water.
'Thanks' she replied, taking a sip.
'Do you mind if I go and change into something more comfortable?' he asked her.
'No go ahead' she replied. He turned around to go upstairs when Calleigh stopped him 'Do you still have my clothes?' she asked and Eric turned to look at her, one leg already on the first step.
'Of course. You wanna come up?' he asked.
Calleigh smiled at him, but Eric could tell that it was a sad smile. One of those smiles she gives after she almost broke down. He could feel how sad she was. Her eyes told the whole story. Her eyes were able to talk more than her own mouth could at times. Being here was affecting her more than she thought was possible. She had thought that her focus would be on Austin and his sister, that thinking about those two kids would help distract her from the place but she couldn't be more wrong.
She walked behind him, her eyes on his figure, on the railings of the stairs, on the colours of the walls, furniture, the bedroom...
The bedroom.
She couldn't go in. She felt like she would break down if she stepped foot in there. She watched him walk inside but she stopped at the entrance, and Eric realized that.
'You're not coming in?' he asked her.
'I...I can't' she whispered hesitantly with shake of her head.
'OK...I'll get you something to change in' he told her. Calleigh thought he sounded upset but Eric could understand. This bedroom held too many beautiful memories, to walk into it as if nothing has changed. She watched him open her drawer and pull out a grey shorts and a baby pink tank top.
'Here you go' he told her handing her the clothes, when their fingers touched and an electric jolt ran through their bodies, making them lock their eyes instantly.
'I'll emm...I'll just go downstairs' she told him, turning immediately around to make her way down. She needed to get away from the bedroom. All she could see was Eric and the bed behind him. The same bed they had made love onto so many times through different times of the day. Eric was a morning person who loved waking up her up with a morning treat while Calleigh was a wild cat at night.
She hurried down the stairs as Eric stood still taking a deep long breath, as her footsteps banged in his ears. He just wanted to go back in time, wanted to go back to when everything was fine and they were together. He turned around and his eyes settled on the bed behind him, feeling tears fill his own brown eyes as he watched them before his own eyes...
She was a goddess on two feet, with angelic blue greenish eyes, blonde hair, figure to die for...she was the woman who had haunted his dreams beautifully through every night since the first day that he had laid eyes on her.
She was lying their, naked in his bed, underneath his body, as his hands cherished her, as his mouth devoured her, as her scent claimed his senses, and as her sweetness left him only thirsty for more, as she arched her back, feeding herself more into his mouth, her hands cupping his head, holding him between his legs, as his tongue worked its magic on her body...
'Calleigh' he whispered longingly.
It was about fifteen minutes later when Eric made his way downstairs, to find her in the grey shorts and baby pink tank top he had given her to change in. Her hair was up in a messy ponytail and she was standing next to the couch with that photo in her hands. He watched her trace her fingers on their picture and Eric couldn't help but feel hopeful.
'Hey' he whispered softly as he approached her.
She turned around to find him in her favorite white tank top and a navy blue shorts 'Hey' she whispered back. She turned around then and placed the frame back in its place.
'I love that picture' she told him as she folded her arms in front of her chest and just stared at it.
'Yeah...me too' he whispered as he approached her.
Calleigh closed her eyes, feeling his presence behind her. He was standing close...very close, but yet...he felt so far away. She kept waiting for him to place his hands on her shoulders and drag them down along her arms, just like he always did...but he didn't, so Calleigh closed her eyes and walked towards the couch, taking a seat.
'Are you alright?' he asked her as he sat down next to her.
She looked at him and sighed heavily 'No not really' she replied in almost a whisper. Her eyes were watery again, and Eric was still trying to understand the strength of this woman. It amazed him how she could hold the tears back for so long when they can be so easy to spill.
'Is it because of the kids?' he asked her.
'Not just the kids' she replied 'It's being here...in this house...' she told him 'I thought I could handle it, but I can't' she whispered 'Seeing that photo...everywhere I look...all I see is us...happy. I don't see us fighting in here...all I can see is you running after me in the kitchen because I stole the last two grapes from your bowl or us making love on that bed upstairs, us sleeping in each other's arms on this couch...' she went on 'I look at you and all I see...is you. You being you and not someone who has hurt me' she told him 'I can't see that anymore...and I'm so tired of fighting this' she told him 'I'm tired of ruining things' she told him.
'You didn't ruin anything' Eric told her 'I was the one who betrayed your trust. I was the one who hurt you. You needed space and I get that' he told her.
'I don't. I don't get that. I shouldn't need that much space that I have to move out, that I have to end things. I am a CSI because I wanted to help people, protect people from who hurts them, and yet...it seems like I need help myself' she told him 'I am so tired of being me' she told him as she dropped her face into her hands.
She felt his hand settle on her back, the familiar caresses travel up and down her spine 'You have been through a lot Cal...Men have put you through a lot and I...I didn't know how to handle us' he told her, and Calleigh lifted her gaze to look at him 'I had wanted you for so long...that when I finally had you in my life like that, I didn't know how to handle it' he told her.
'You were going through a lot at the time' she told him.
'Yes I was and all I could see was that I wanted to protect you instead of sharing what was going on with you. All I could see was that you could get hurt if you knew what was happening, and while I was focusing on protecting you from the truth...you were feeling betrayed. We were moving in different directions instead of the same one' he told her.
Calleigh took a deep long breath and let herself lean back 'I think we were both afraid of losing each other that we ended up doing things that eventually pulled us apart. Our job certainly didn't help' she told him.
'No...but that is our job' he shrugged 'We just didn't know how to handle us together I guess' he told her.
'I'm sorry' she apologized 'I'm sorry I messed things up' she told him as a tear escaped down her cheek.
Eric reached out his hand and wiped the tears away as he watched her close her eyes, enjoying the feeling of having his hand on her face like that 'I'm sorry too Cal' he whispered 'I wish we can go back to how things were' he told her.
Calleigh opened her eyes at his statement and turned properly to look at him, one leg bent on the couch as she shifted closer 'I don't' she told him and Eric almost froze at her words until the next couple followed 'I want a fresh start' she told him and Calleigh could see how his face suddenly lit up at her words.
'You do?' he whispered hopeful.
'I do' she told him 'I know that we have been through a lot and yes, we have both hurt each other unintentionally of course...but we have learned from our mistakes and I guess the worst is over. We know what to expect...we know what we like and what we don't about each other...we can deal with each other now' she told him, and Eric could see the sudden light that filled her eyes.
'And best of all...no stupid policy to forbid us from being together' Eric told her and Calleigh's smile widened.
'So what now?' she asked him, as she swallowed hard watching him getting closer to her.
'Now...' he whispered as he cupped one cheek, feeling his heart pounding hard in his chest, dancing the same tune as Calleigh's heart rate 'Now this' he told her as he pressed his lips against hers. Calleigh grabbed his top as she practically climbed on top of him, straddling him, wrapping her legs around him, her arms moving round his neck, as she parted her lips, inviting Eric in, as he deepened the kiss.
He kissed her lips softly, resting his forehead against her's as he ended the kiss 'Cal' he whispered as she closed her eyes.
'Just hold me' she whispered.
They shifted so Eric settled on his back while Calleigh let her body relax on top of his, the side of her face resting against his chest, listening in on his perfect heartbeat, her fingers dancing upon the caramel skin on his upper arm.
'How did we divert the subject from the kids to us?' she whispered trying to understand how they got to this point.
'I guess being in this house again was inevitable' Eric replied with a shrug as his fingers played with the end of her ponytail.
'I guess' she replied.
'Do you want to tell me what happened with Austin?' he asked her then.
Calleigh shifted on her chest, her arms folded under her chin as she looked at Eric, his head popped up by one of the cushions 'He wanted to come home with me' she told him.
'Was it just the job that held you back from agreeing?' he asked her.
'No not just the job...it is of course a huge part, but mainly it was because I am all alone, and that is not what I want for them. I want them to be in a proper family. I want them to have someone to go home to who would love them and be able to spend time with them...but as they left...I realized that having kids, having a family was all I ever wanted in the end, and yet...until then I didn't even have a man in my life much less be able to start a family' she told him.
'You always had a man in your life Cal. You had a man in your life since that moment we met' he told her and Calleigh smiled at him.
'And then I came here and I recalled all of those moments I had thought of having all of that with you. I know how much you want to have a family, and deep down, I had wanted to give that to you' she told him.
'You did?' he asked her.
'I do' she replied and Eric smiled 'But I think now is not the right time to discuss that, and even now that you and I are back together...Austin and Patty needs to be in a stable family environment, which is something that we cannot give them' Calleigh told him.
'You know that whenever you want...if you ever want to discuss Austin and Patty again...you know the possibility of actually adopting them...I am open to that. I would do anything to make you happy Cal' he told her and Calleigh smiled.
'I know...but I think it is best if we focus on us now and well who knows...no one knows what the future holds' she told him with a shrug 'If maybe one day Austin and Patty would require a new home, then we can consider it. In the meantime, I promised him I will visit and stay in touch, so you can come with me if you want to' she told him.
'I would love to...but until then...let's focus on us. On facing facts and truth about life and us' Eric told her.
'I agree' she replied.
'So Duquesne...will you stay the night?' he asked her sexily and Calleigh smiled.
'Of course I will Delko' she replied with a laugh as Eric pressed a kiss to her forehead and wrapped his arms around her, enjoying the feel of having her now and forever.