Author's note: We are so in a horrendous writing slump. It really, really sucks. Disclaimer: We are not worth suing, trust me. We don't own anything, we Rent. Yeah. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~

"A drunken elf is by far a very bad thing." Legolas swayed and pointed scoldingly at a tree.

Ellrohir laughed uproariously, but stopped abruptly as a hiccup escaped him. Elladan giggled hysterically.

"S'wat 'bout five?" Haldir slurred, sounding authentically curious. We'll assume that he was talking to Legolas, even though he appeared to be addressing a wine jug. " Thas' jus' fun!" Glorfindel chirped in. Everyone turned to Legolas, waiting for his opinion on that particular revelation.

"Yeah, sounds right."

"Yeah!"

"Am I drunk?"

"Yes Glorfindel, you are."

"How'd I get drunk?"

"Same way as me, I s'pect." Legolas yawned widely, then slumped to the cold, hard ground, fast asleep.

The other elves stared at him appraisingly for a few minutes. Ellrohir was first to break the relative silence.

"Why does he look so much like a girl?"

"Don't know."

"He doesn't dress like a girl."

"Course not! He's a he!"

"We could fix that."

"What, the fact he's a guy?"

"No! His clothing."

Ellrohir, Haldir, and Glorfindel stared hard at the smirking Elladan, the evil tone he spoke with and the mischievous glint in his eyes further ruining his badly contrived façade of innocence.

"How!?!"

Elladan smiled indulgently. "I bet that he," the elf motions towards the unconscious form of Legolas, "could fit into at least one of Arwen's dresses." Three sets of eyes flickered from Elladan, to the snoozing Legolas, briefly towards each other, then back to Elladan again.

"Ooooh..fun."