Focus…

That is all that there is- never lose sight of the target and never remove concentrated aim. To be defeated by distractions and to be carried away by the colors of deceit relieves the enemy of finding one's weakness. I have never failed in that aspect. I have never ever lost sight of my priorities in life, because I know that the only concern is the end.

Musashi would agree with me on this, and would attest the disposal I have to keep my mind ever straight. He compliments me sometimes for my firm chase on becoming a true warrior, a noble champion, who can bare witness to the greatness of the cosmos.

Yes, everything was clear for me; calculated and planned, unto the last detail I flatten out my course of action and see to the favorable outcome of my decisions. No hurdle can be tall enough to hinder me; no, not with the discipline I have founded my stature and habits.

Bewildered I was, then, to find myself faltering one day when I met an object of a mission I was to accomplish.

The mission was simple; infiltration, information, distraction and if necessary, sabotage. It follows then that I am to practice deceit, that I am to learn how to play with the games of the farce. And that I am to perform betrayal in the eyes of those whose trust I have to gain. Certainly it wasn't easy for pretence is never a favorable habit of a samurai. We are true warriors and as such we are to be always.

But I was surprised- I didn't have to pretend. The first few days of performance immediately got the affirmation of a certain pink-haired member. She bears the title joker, and special member with no particular expertise but with obvious, extra-ordinary capacities.

It occurred to me at that point she's going to be a factor- either of a problem or of an assistance. In any case, I was to keep my eyes on her. My correspondent agreed on this.

And so the disguise went on. The group was a just a bunch of unsuspecting children, who trust easily- especially the joker by the name of Amu. She's the most gullible I suppose, but I find myself losing my focus because of her. Until now, I haven't understood how that was possible. She just inserted herself every once in a while and before I knew, she has resided my thoughts, and I didn't have any means to remove her face from my mind.

It is what juvinilles call, crush, although the term is highly ambiguous and irrelevant. Still, I considered the state of my emotions, and where it is leading my priorities. It is obvious that my desires were beginning to involve more and more that joker of the guardians. And so, I decided to pull to my favor the climax of my mission. If I am to betray a person of my affections, I would just have to do it while the affection has not reached a damaging point in my heart yet.

To see her betrayed face looking at me; it was a distasteful image, but one I did best to stomach when she finally became aware of the truth. I bore this, for three days, with my immature mind set on the defeat of the guardians. I am a warrior and I act in accordance to my mission.

I thought I have sealed my own fate at that moment, when we were forced to fight- me and Amu; the jack and the joker, noble and the treacherous. I hated that concept of being the dishonorable person.

And so we fought. I lost, disarmed and beaten to shame. Of course, it was expected- I was not motivated to fight nor would I have won even if I was. Amu was powerful, but not because of her charas. It is because of her kindness towards others. She has no reason for shame.

I did- back then.

"Kairi!" I was surprised when she called on to me. I looked at her, and I saw that smile which got me falling for her. And that was enough. I realized my mistake, my disregard for distractions; my disregard for friends and for her.

Her smile was enough- no words to confuse me by, or accusations to point at me. Just an assurance of her untainted affection. She is amazing, that Amu…

I became clear then. I have accomplished my mission given by my sister, thought my love for weigh no less. I now have a new mission, and my priority is clear, my focus is concentrated.

"I love you, Hinamori Amu. Now, always and forever, I love you. Someday, when I have become a man worthy of you, I'll come back."

I also wanted to make it clear for them; to Amu and to the guy who threatens to be my rival.

"Tadase, I am ahead of you…"

Distractions… I'd be a fool to deny my enjoyment of them once in a while.

And so I am here now in the plane, to pay a visit to the greatest distraction of my life. The distraction that actually set my priorities straight … even now the image of her beautiful face never fails to inspire me.

Amu… now is not the time to ask for your hand. It has only been a year since we met, but I want to refresh my memories of you.