Chapter 1 - All of me.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of this story. They are fictional and they belong to the writers of Grey's Anatomy.

"Dr. Robbins, we are losing her".

Arizona closed her eyes, took a deep breath and remembered what Dr. Herman had said. "Make sure her blood preasure is stabilized". She was failing her. She owned Dr. Herman a successfull surgery, no matter if she died or lived to see it. She couldn't fail her, not after all the effort and all the sleepless hours she spent teaching her.

"Dr. Robbins, I can take it from here"

"I can finish my own surgeries, Dr. Bailey"

Miranda noticed the awkward tone of Arizona's voice and she did her best to sound less demanding.

"I know! We all know you can but this is not a matter of capability, skills or knowledge"

"Dr. Bailey, please!" Arizona shouted.

The room filled with an awkward silence. The team inside the OR was not only impressed by Arizona's reaction but they were also foreseen what was about to come.

"This has gotten out of your hands, Dr. Robbins. Let me save her. It is going to be ok if you let me help" Miranda tried one more time to convince her.

Arizona was about to cry and her hands were shaking. She knew she had to do something but fear was bloking her mind. Fear was taking over her.

"Miranda, get…out…of my OR!"

"Wilson, bring Dr. Hunt, inmediately!"

Jo ran as fast as she could to the OR Hunt was supposed to be in. An eighteen hour surgery all the hospital and the entire country had their eyes on was happening inside those walls. Not only was the life of Dr. Nicole Herman in risk but the credibility and career of Dr. Amelia Shepard. As soon as she entered, the whole room turned to see her. Something was obviously wrong and everybody noticed it.

"Dr. Hunt, you need to come with me. It's quite urgent!"

Jo explained Hunt what was happening on their way but none of them realized Arizona's situation was related to the surgery they had just left behind. Hunt entered Robbin's OR to find her completely frozen in front of a patient whose heart beat on the monitor was indicating the emergency they were confronting.

"Robbins, come with me!" Owen tried to grab her arm to lead her out but she wouldn't let him.

"No, no, Owen, please! ...I know what I am doing. I just need some time. I just need to…I need to…"

Arizona couldn't even talk. She let her scalpel fall and that was enough for Owen to understand she was completely lost. He grabbed her by the arm once more and successfully got her out the OR.

She took both hands to her head, closed her eyes and breathed deeply.

"Owen, please! They need me. This is my surgery, it is my responsability. I need to be in there!" Arizona insisted.

"Listen, you cannot keep going with this. You know Bailey will do whatever is in her hands to save that patient, you have to trust her!"

She needed someone to talk to. Anyone that could understand her.

"I need to talk to Amelia"

Owen looked down.

"Amelia is…"

"Right!...right!..."

Arizona walked to the closest on call room and let herself fall into one of the beds. Crying was the only thing she could do. She felt so impotent, so useless. She couldn't save Glenda Castillo, nor she could do anything to save Herman. She needed Amelia, she needed someone to talk to but no one was around, no one was available. In the past few months, Herman and Amelia were all she had, the only doctors she had spent real time with. Work had become home and they had become her closest friends. She took her phone out and looked at her screen. An unread message from Callie was awaiting her.

"Callie! I should talk to Callie."

She dialed her number while tears kept falling on the screen.

"Please, please! Pick up!"

The phone rang a few times.

"Arizona?"

Callie's voice made Arizona feel better instantly. Her voice was comforting, the familiar sound of it made her feel safe.

"Are you...Are you at the hospital right now?" Arizona tried to sound as cool as she could.

"No, I left an hour ago. I came home to pick up a few things. Why? Are you ok?"

Callie knew something was wrong. They didn't called each other often anymore.

"Callie, I…"

"Hi mommy!"

Sophie interrupted them.

"Hi, sweetie! How are you? Did you have fun today?"

"Yes. Will you come home tonight?"

Sophia was still very little to understand her mothers were not together anymore but she could definitely feel Arizona's absence at home.

"I will, I will sing you a song before you go to bed. Ok?"

"I miss you!"

Arizona took a second before replying. She tried hard not to show Sophia she was crying. She needed to hang up.

"I miss you too, my love! But I really need to go. Mommy needs to do important things".

She felt terrible hanging up on her daughter but she couldn't keep pretending anymore.

"See you tonight, sweetie! Goodbye!"

"Bye, mom"

"No, no! Don't!" Callie tried to stop Sophia from hanging up.

"Arizona?..."

Callie put her phone inside her purse. Grabbed Sophia, her keys and left to the hospital.

"I knew this was coming!".

I'm sorry this is so short. I promise to make it better and less boring. I appreciate your comments :)