A/N: Written for HD Hurtfest 2014. Betaed by gusx217.

RAISING TEDDY

Harry was exhausted. No, he was beyond exhausted. He didn't remember the last time he had slept through the night. He swayed on his feet, blood-shot eyes trying to focus on the chore at hand while listening to the blessed silence in the house, afraid that it would break any minute now. He didn't notice that the spells he was using for cleaning the baby clothes were feeble and mostly useless.

Now that he thought of it, he actually did remember the last time he'd had a full night sleep. It was the night before Kreacher had rushed back to 12 Grimmauld Place with alarming news from Andromeda Tonks. It was the night when Harry's little godson Teddy had come to live with him.

Andromeda had been taking care of little Teddy since the war ended, but soon her health had deteriorated rapidly and she fell into a deep depression. In the moment of her darkest desperation she had called Kreacher, the House Elf of her childhood home, for help. Kreacher had responded to her because she was the daughter of his beloved Mistress Black and Kreacher still wanted to fulfill his duty to his former Mistress and the Black family.

That night Kreacher had returned to 12 Grimmauld Place with a two months old infant and a letter, where Andromeda Tonks had asked Harry to take care of the baby as she couldn't do it anymore. After all, Harry was Teddy's godfather and thus a legally eligible guardian for the baby. Andromeda had been taken to St Mungo's, and the Healers didn't give any promises if she would ever be able to take care of her grandson anymore. She was too devastated by the deaths of her husband, daughter and son-in-law, that her health - both mental and physical - wouldn't tolerate any stress even on a good day.

Teddy had been living with Harry almost three weeks now and Harry was already wondering how he was ever going to survive the challenge of taking care of a baby. Teddy was a beautiful, lovely baby - especially in the rare moments when he wasn't screaming his head off. Harry was feeling helpless and frustrated at his own ineptitude at not knowing what to do. He was disappointed at himself that he still couldn't read the different signs and sounds from Teddy to know what he needed. That's why Teddy usually had the time to drive himself into a serious screaming fit before Harry managed to guess what was wrong and help him. Then it was another struggle to get Teddy to calm down.

What's more, Teddy had been suffering from colic, as Hermione had helpfully told him after searching for information about Teddy's nightly screaming bouts. Hermione had been helpful when it came to finding information, but Harry knew her well enough to not ask for her help in any other way. Hermione had been too busy with her parents' recovering after the war and revoking the memory spells she had been forced to cast on them.

Also Molly had offered to help with taking care of Teddy, and at first Harry had been grateful. Then he had overheard Molly telling Arthur that Harry was too young to be Teddy's caretaker, and Arthur should do something about it. After hearing that, Harry had gently but firmly declined every one of Molly's offers for help, declaring that he and Teddy were fine. If anything, Harry refused to risk that Teddy would end up spending his childhood like Harry had, feeling as a burden to someone who would never love him, only tolerating him because they had to. Harry knew he was at his wits end with his exhaustion and stress, but he swore that he would never give up. Soon Teddy would reach 3 months, and according to Hermione, that was the age when the baby colic usually eased. Harry would manage until then, one way or another. Sleeping was way overrated, anyway.

He had tried to sleep whenever Teddy slept, but he was always worrying too much, always too alert to sleep well. Harry's sleep was fitful and restless, as if he was listening all the time to make sure Teddy was alright or if he needed anything, anticipating when he would probably need his bottle or his nappy changed. Harry's life revolved only around Teddy and his needs. There was no joy anymore, only struggling to survive one day at the time.

Harry's hazy mind perked up when he heard a quiet whimper coming from Teddy's room. He dropped the clothes from his hands and hurried to Teddy before the screaming started in full force. When he cracked the door to Teddy's room, he was met with silence. He stepped inside the room to see better, and saw Teddy sound asleep. Harry stared at the baby; he looked so peaceful when sleeping, his little fists resting on his pillow, relaxed, and his long eyelashes trembling as he dreamed. Harry couldn't help but hope that he dreamed of happy days full of love and joy. That's what he wished for Teddy.

Harry left the room silently, wondering if he had misheard Teddy's whimper - that had happened too often lately. Harry couldn't even trust his hearing anymore. His sleep deprivation was making him hear things that didn't even exist. Harry tiredly shook his head and went back to cleaning.

One hour later Harry jumped from the sofa where he had been dozing off. The loud wailing coming from Teddy's room made him react without thinking and he rushed into Teddy's room in no time. Teddy had obviously been screaming for a while already, judging by his angry red face and tears running down his little face. Harry picked him up, hushing and rocking him but none of it seemed to help - as usual.

Harry carried Teddy to the kitchen and warmed a bottle for him, but Teddy wasn't hungry, or at least he didn't want milk. He just screamed. Harry turned the baby around on his belly and bounced him gently in his arms, just like Molly had taught him to do, but that wasn't good enough for Teddy either. He continued to scream.

Harry carried Teddy to the nursery and changed his nappy, but it made no difference to his screaming. Harry felt like crying. This was going to be a long night, again, carrying Teddy around the house and praying he would stop crying soon. Somewhere around midnight Harry's constant humming and singing became somewhat audible from Teddy's crying as the baby's screams quieted into pitiful whimpers before he fell asleep. As usual, by that time Harry was so exhausted that he could barely stay on his feet. Harry took Teddy back to bed and collapsed.

It felt as if Harry had slept only five minutes, when he woke up to pounding on his front door. Groaning, he scrambled to his feet and staggered to the door. When he opened it, he was met with a furious looking Draco Malfoy.

"What the hell are you playing at, Potter? Doesn't the Savior of the Wizarding World know the simplest rules of good manners? My mother has been sending you dozens of owls and you just ignored them? What the hell is wrong with you, Potter? My mother has been worried sick after finding out that her sister has been taken to St Mungo's and her grandchild is in your care, and you don't bother to answer even one of her owls?" Malfoy's tirade was hurting Harry's ears and he covered them with his hands.

"What do you want, Malfoy? And for Merlin's sake, keep it quiet or you'll wake Teddy," Harry groaned.

"Answer the bloody owls, Potter, that's the only thing I want!" Malfoy raised his voice again, and to Harry's despair, he heard the unmistakable wailing starting in Teddy's room.

"Oh great, now you woke him up. So bloody perfect," Harry groaned and turned, shuffling towards Teddy's room. He heard the door closing behind him, but at this point he didn't even care if Malfoy was inside the house or outside.

Some time later, when he went back downstairs with Teddy in his arms, he noticed Malfoy still standing in the foyer looking nervous.

"What now? I thought I got rid of you after you had delivered the message," Harry snarled when he passed Malfoy on his way to the kitchen. Teddy had been surprisingly quiet after Harry had picked him up this morning and now he was staring at Malfoy with wide eyes.

"So this is my little cousin. Edward Lupin, son of my cousin Nymphadora Tonks. I've been looking forward to meeting him," Malfoy said, wonder in his voice.

"We call him Teddy, but yes, he's Tonks' and Remus' son, my godson. Now that you've seen him, you can leave." Harry wanted to get rid of Malfoy as soon as possible. His visit didn't promise anything good for Harry and Teddy, that was certain. Malfoy didn't take the hint and leave, but instead followed Harry and Teddy to the kitchen.

"Are you alright here with Teddy? You don't look so good," Malfoy asked.

"Everything is fine. Now, please, leave. I need to feed Teddy. He's always famished in the morning after a restless night." Harry turned and began to prepare Teddy's bottle.

"May I hold him for a minute, please?" Malfoy's voice was low and he stood so close to Harry that his heart jumped in his chest and panic swelled inside him.

"No! You may not hold him," Harry spluttered and held Teddy even more tightly than usual. Teddy started squirming in his grip, but Harry wasn't going to let Malfoy take Teddy from him, not even for a minute. For all Harry knew, Malfoy could take Teddy and run, take him away from Harry, as he was Teddy's family - something Harry wasn't.

Fortunately the bottle was ready and Harry sat down, holding Teddy in his lap. Teddy began sucking his bottle with a healthy appetite, and Harry relaxed a bit. Now Malfoy could see that Teddy was in good health and taken care of.

Harry raised his eyes from Teddy to Malfoy and was surprised to see Malfoy standing so close to them, an undecipherable expression on his face.

"Listen, Potter, I'm not here to spy on you and how you take care of my cousin. I just wanted to know why you haven't answered my mother's owls. She's been sick from worry for her sister and Teddy. Would you please let her see Teddy, at least?"

"Not a good idea, Malfoy. You can tell her that Teddy is in good hands here."

"Why not? What are you afraid of? I promise she will not intervene at how you handle Teddy. She just wants to see him."

"And then what? After she sees him, she'll declare that Teddy belongs with his family and then I'd never see him again. Not going to happen."

Malfoy huffed in annoyance. "Come on, Potter. Even you can't be so daft. Aunt Andromeda made it clear to my mother that you are the legal guardian for Teddy, and no one can fight against that, especially you being the hero and all. I promise you, my mother and I will not take Teddy away from you. Just let her visit, just once, and see how it goes."

Harry eyed Malfoy suspiciously, but couldn't see anything but sincerity in his earnest eyes. He sighed and looked at the baby in his arms, petting his silken hair that had started to change colour from dark to blond.

"Okay, she may visit once, but no promises for more visits. We'll see how it goes first."

Malfoy's smile was so bright that it lit the whole room and Harry shook his head in annoyance. Did the git always get what he wanted? Why did he give in so easily? He was too tired to argue, that's probably it.

Narcissa Malfoy arrived two days later for a visit, and of course she was escorted by her son. Harry was cautious, nervously fussing over Teddy who was behaving very well. Actually, the past few days Harry had noticed that Teddy's crying had lessened a lot, but still the nights were trying for both of them. During the day they actually spent a lot of time together peacefully, Harry entertaining the little boy with different sounds and pictures, and telling him a lot of stories about his parents. Of course Teddy was too little to understand any of it yet, but Harry felt better when he could talk about Tonks and Remus to their little son.

Harry had stalled over half an hour not letting Narcissa hold Teddy, and he bristled at Malfoy's pointed glares and barely veiled jabs about trust issues. Narcissa seemed to be quite aware of the situation, because she turned to look at her son.

"Stop that, Draco. Mr Potter was kind to let us visit in the first place. It's his choice if he lets me hold the baby or not. We haven't actually been the most trustworthy family during the war, have we?" Narcissa scolded her son, and Malfoy had sense to blush.

Harry felt a bit ashamed about his suspicious behavior.

"No, Mrs Malfoy, he's absolutely right. You are Teddy's family and I should treat you as such. I'm sorry, I've been alone with Teddy so long that I must have forgotten my manners. Would you like to hold him, Mrs Malfoy?"

Narcissa smiled brightly, and Harry could see clearly where Malfoy had inherited the beautiful smile.

"Oh please, Mr Potter, you can call me Narcissa. With you being Teddy's guardian and godfather, we are practically family, aren't we?"

"Er… right, I guess we are," Harry muttered and held Teddy out to Narcissa. "And please, call me Harry."

Harry kept a close eye on Teddy and Narcissa, trying to reassure himself that he made the right decision when he entrusted Teddy with Narcissa. Slowly he started to relax when he realized how well the baby and his grand aunt got along. Narcissa cooed at Teddy, and Teddy gurgled happily back at her. Even Malfoy seemed to enjoy the sight and smiled. He leaned closer to Harry, obviously wanting to say something.

"Mother adores him already. She might have some advice for you, I mean the nights when Teddy is restless. You look like you could use some sleep, Potter."

Before Harry could answer, Teddy started to fuss and became restless. Narcissa walked around the room bouncing Teddy in her arms and quietly singing some lullaby that Harry didn't recognize.

"I think Teddy is hungry, and it's time for his nap anyway, so…" Harry started hesitantly, but Narcissa reacted immediately.

"Of course, Harry. There you go, baby," she gave Teddy back to Harry. "Harry, I don't want to interfere, but you look tired. Teddy doesn't let you sleep enough, I take it?"

Harry was instantly defensive. "We both are fine, Narcissa. Don't worry about it."

"Of course. I apologize if I made a hasty conclusion. Anyway, I'm sure I have some books in our library that could be useful for you. I could send them to you, if you'd like."

"Sure, thanks." Harry wasn't sure what he was supposed to do or say, he just focused on Teddy and his fussing.

"Very well then. Now it's time for us to let you two continue on your daily routines. Thank you so much for letting me visit, Harry. It meant a lot to me," Narcissa said and prepared to leave.

"You're welcome. And… if you want to visit again, well… it's okay with me," Harry answered feeling a little shy all of a sudden.

Narcissa smiled brightly. "Oh, I'd love to. Thank you so much, Harry. I'll send you the books tomorrow."

Malfoy nodded at Harry before leading his mother out of the door, and Harry went to take care of Teddy.

The next morning, after another trying night, Harry woke up to insistent knocking on the door. He glanced around and noticed that he had crashed on the living room sofa last night, but he didn't remember how he ended up there. Well, that was not the first time. His head was pounding and he felt nauseous, but that wasn't new either. Then he realized that the knocking on the door still continued, and he struggled to get up and answer the door. His head was dizzy and he thought it better to support himself along the wall on his way to the door.

As soon as he managed to wrench the door open, his stomach roiled so badly that he only had time to see it was Malfoy standing by the door, until he had to run to the loo to throw up. He heard the footsteps approaching when he was crouching over the toilet retching, and he felt mortified at Malfoy seeing him like that.

"What's wrong, Potter? Having a hangover?" Malfoy sneered from the doorway.

"Fuck off, Malfoy. There's no alcohol in this house at all."

"Then what is it? Are you sick or something?"

"I don't know. As if you cared anyway."

"I do care. Come on, let's get you in bed. Then I'll call the Healer." Malfoy took a firm grip of his arms and helped him to stand. Then he helped walk Harry towards to his bedroom. When they passed Teddy's room, Harry froze.

"Teddy! I need to take care of Teddy. He will wake up soon. I can't afford to be sick now!"

"Yes you can. You are definitely not feeling well and you're going nowhere but to your bed right now. I'll take care of Teddy," Malfoy's tone was annoyingly firm.

"You? You don't know a thing about taking care of a baby," Harry argued, but his voice was weak.

"Well, maybe I don't, but I do know how to ask for help, unlike you, idiot. Now, get in and settle down. I have some Floo calls to make."

Harry was feeling so crappy that he didn't argue any further. He just snuggled into bed, a bed he hadn't really used in the past weeks, but now appreciated the comfort it offered.

As if through a haze he heard noises, Teddy's crying and then gurgling, someone coming in and then going out of the room, and finally a cool hand touching his forehead and then gently shaking his shoulder.

"Mr Potter? Would you please try to wake up a little so I can run some tests?" A low male voice Harry didn't recognize spoke calmly somewhere next to him.

Harry opened his eyes and saw a middle-aged man standing next to his bed.

"Mr Potter, I'm Healer Madden. Mr. Malfoy Floo called me and asked me to come see you. I believe you haven't been feeling very well lately?"

"Err.." Harry had to clear his throat before he found his voice. "I just haven't been sleeping very well lately. I'm fine, really. Where's Teddy?" Harry tried to get up from the bed, but his throbbing head made him wince, and the Healer gently pushed him back down.

"You are most certainly not well, Mr Potter. Stay in bed. Mrs. Malfoy is taking care of little Teddy, so no need to worry. Now, stay still so I can cast a scanning spell to see what's wrong with you."

Harry closed his eyes and relaxed. Teddy was alright and he didn't need to worry. He couldn't believe how he suddenly trusted Narcissa Malfoy to take care of Teddy for a while. Only yesterday - or was it the day before that? - he had been so suspicious about both Malfoys, but now, well, he was too tired to do anything about it, since he could hear Teddy was still in the house and thank goodness, he wasn't crying.

The Healer hummed as if confirming something that his scanning had revealed, and Harry opened his eyes.

"What is it?" he croaked.

"Well, Mr Potter, it's nothing fatal, yet, but it can turn serious if you don't start taking care of yourself. Severe exhaustion, insomnia, malnutrition, depression - you have it all. Taking care of a small baby isn't easy, especially for a young single wizard. You are a smart young man, why didn't you ask for help? Even older and more experienced parents will struggle with a colical baby, why would you think you could have managed all by yourself?" The Healer scolded Harry gently.

"I… I thought that they would take Teddy from me if I couldn't handle him," Harry confessed, avoiding the Healer's eyes.

"Why would anyone do that? You are of age and his legal guardian, and Teddy is a healthy baby, clearly well taken care of. You have done well, but now you have to take care of yourself. Find someone to help you with the baby, but first you need to rest well. Bed rest for a week and sleep as much as you can. I'll recommend you the potion for dreamless sleep and some nutrition potions to start with. I will come and check with you next week."

"But… what about Teddy? I need to be with him!" Harry cried out.

"Potter, really, just do what Healer Madden tells you to do, and leave everything else to me and my mother. You just concentrate on getting better, and we will take care of the rest. Teddy isn't going anywhere while you sleep," Malfoy's voice came from the other side of the room. Harry hadn't realized that he had been present the whole time.

"You have your own life, you can't stay here for so long," Harry tried to argue, but Malfoy cut him short.

"We can and we will. Family comes first, and Teddy with you as his guardian are considered family to us. Now stop arguing, take your potions and go to sleep. Teddy will be here when you wake up."

Malfoy's tone didn't give any room for argument, and the Healer nodded his head approvingly. Harry took his potions and then he slept.

His sleep was dreamless, just like the potion promised, and long. Somewhere during his sleep he felt cold and he realized through his sleepy haze that he was shivering uncontrollably. Someone covered him with an extra blanket and crawled in bed next to him, holding him close and warming him up. Harry snuggled even closer to that warm body and sank deeper into sleep.

He woke up to a ray of sun tickling his eyelashes, and slowly he came to his surroundings. Even with his eyes still closed, he recognized his own bedroom and his own bed. That warm body was still pressed against him, and he snuggled back into the warmth letting out a moan of appreciation. Strong hands held him tightly and Harry smiled against the bare shoulder his cheek was pressed to. That was nice. Having someone here with him, looking after Teddy together… Teddy! Harry bolted upright drawing an irritated grunt from his companion.

Harry's eyes shot open and to his horror, he saw that he had been cuddling with Malfoy! Harry swung his legs off the bed and went to stand up, but his head didn't approve so sudden a motion and Harry crashed back onto the bed crying out, pain flashing through his head.

Malfoy took a hold of Harry and helped him to lie down comfortably.

"Don't try to rush things, you are not recovered yet. Do you need something?" Malfoy asked with a voice gruff from sleep.

"What… what the bloody hell are you doing in my bed half-naked?" Harry managed to grumble.

"You were cold and none of the extra blankets could warm you up enough. Then I remembered the trick about warming up with body heat and that seemed to help. Now, do you need something before taking your potions? Breakfast?"

"Uh… I need to go to the bathroom and then I want to see Teddy."

"Bathroom, breakfast, Teddy, in that order," Malfoy decided for him and helped him to his feet to go to the bathroom. Fortunately he waited outside the bathroom until Harry was finished, and then helped him back to bed. Harry felt still so dizzy that he accepted the offered help without arguing.

A breakfast tray had been placed on the nightstand, and the delicious smells made Harry's stomach growl from hunger.

"That can't be Kreacher's doing. That House-Elf simply can't cook," Harry said staring in awe at the steaming tea, eggs and bacon, crispy toast, honey, jam and fruits set out for him. "This must be for both of us. I can't eat this much."

"It's for you alone. I can eat later. And it's definitely not Kreacher's cooking," Malfoy shuddered at the thought. "The first time he cooked us a meal… let's just say that the next meal was cooked by our own House-Elf Dinky from the Manor."

"Oh… so you have already moved in here?" Harry had to ask.

"Absolutely not. We just brought what we needed for a week, including a proper housekeeping. Mother and my old nanny Missy have been taking care of Teddy. I stayed with you when needed. Now eat. My mother will bring Teddy here once you have finished your breakfast."

Harry didn't need more incentive to eat his breakfast and he managed to eat almost half of it until he felt like bursting. Soon after, Narcissa arrived with Teddy in her arms. Both were smiling widely at Harry, and Teddy reached his little arms out for Harry.

Narcissa laid Teddy down on the bed where Harry and the baby could comfortably spend time together. Harry entertained Teddy who giggled and gurgled at Harry's antics. All too soon, though, Harry's eyes grew heavy and he settled back on the bed for more sleep. Still smiling Narcissa took Teddy from Harry, and before they left the room and sleep claimed Harry, he managed to say in a quiet voice, "Thank you. Thank you for taking care of us. You didn't have to do it and yet you stayed. Thank you."

Narcissa's smile turned even warmer and she patted Harry's arm with her free hand. "Harry, you and Teddy are our family. Of course we are here for you both, as long as you need us. Now, go back to sleep. Sweet dreams, dear."

The whole week went quite the same. Harry mostly slept, ate a little, played with Teddy, took his potions and slept some more. Narcissa, Malfoy - who Harry tried to learn to call Draco only because Narcissa and Draco insisted - took care of things, and Harry thought that if this continued any longer than a week, he would probably get too used to it.

Sometimes, when he woke up alone in his room, he let his thoughts run freely and he let himself dream of family, just like this, having a child, a grandmother, a brother… no, a husband? Probably not, despite Draco's cuddling in Harry's bed almost every night. Harry didn't know what Draco was to him, definitely not a brother but maybe just a friend. He had grown to like the git quite a lot during these days. Draco was proud, confident, sometimes still a prat, but he treated Harry as his equal, never belittling or mocking him, never making him feel he was worthless, although Harry still thought himself worthless more often than not.

Somehow he dreaded the day when the Malfoy's would go back to their own life, leaving him and Teddy all alone again. He didn't want to be alone anymore, now that he'd gotten a taste of family life. Narcissa and Draco often mentioned them all being a family, and Harry knew now that it was something he wanted, really, really wanted.

Harry was on the brink of tears when the dreadful day arrived and the Malfoys had to leave 12 Grimmauld Place to return to their own life. He loathed himself for getting so attached to the Malfoys after only one week, but he couldn't help it. He knew that he wasn't fully recovered yet and he would need to take extra care of himself, but he would manage with the help of Missy, who the Malfoys insisted should stay with Harry and Teddy. She would help taking care of Teddy at nights, and Harry would look after Teddy during the day. Harry appreciated the help, but he knew that he would miss Narcissa and Draco tremendously. But, as Narcissa reminded him, they would visit very often. Still, Harry felt all his insecurities and doubts return in full force as soon as the door closed after the Malfoys.

The first night alone was difficult. Teddy was doing fine with Missy's care, and his nightly screaming bouts seemed to lessen. The colic season was obviously nearly over. No, Teddy wasn't the problem, it was Harry. He was already feeling lonely and couldn't sleep without his own personal hottie against him. He wasn't cold, not really, but he missed the closeness, the intimacy between him and Draco. They hadn't so much as kissed yet, but they had gotten used to sleeping together during the week and now Harry was paying the price for that indulgence.

Harry tossed and turned in his bed, squeezing a large pillow as a substitute for Draco in his arms, but nothing he tried came even close to the real thing. Sleep avoided him completely without Draco, and he was becoming desperate just thinking that he should get used to this from now on. Frustrated, he punched his pillow, trying to beat it into submission to give him some comfort, when he heard a floorboard creaking outside of his bedroom, and then familiar footsteps approaching his door.

"Harry? Are you awake?" Draco's quiet voice asked behind the door. Then the door cracked open and Draco's head peeked inside.

Harry was dumbfounded; had he been so desperate that now he was hallucinating Draco coming into his room?

"Yeah, I'm awake," he finally managed. "What are you doing here?"

"Missy let me in. I was worried and just wanted to check that you are alright."

"Really?" Harry still couldn't believe his eyes.

"Yeah," Draco said, looking everywhere else but at Harry. "Well, I couldn't sleep, and I thought…"

Harry grinned. "I couldn't sleep either. I guess we are too used to sleeping together that it will be a hard habit to break. Do you want to?"

"Want to what, break that habit?"

"No, you moron. Do you want to sleep here with me?" Harry patted the pillow next to his.

"Well, if you insist." Draco made quick work of removing his shoes, socks, trousers and shirt, and didn't waste time getting in bed. He opened his arms for Harry, who dove in without hesitation and let the feelings of comfort and safety surround him.

After a long silence, Harry raised his head to look at Draco.

"What are we going to do, Draco?"

"I suggest we sleep, scarhead."

"No, I mean how are we going to make this work between us?" Harry asked a bit impatiently.

"We will figure it out as we go. Don't worry, you won't be alone anymore," Draco said and kissed his temple.

On a sudden impulse Harry turned his head and captured Draco's lips in a kiss, and to his delight, Draco kissed him back. The kiss was long and sweet, making Harry feel warm inside, and right now, at this perfect moment, everything was alright. And if Harry had any say in the matter, things would stay that way from now on.

The End