Author: Nicole Alexandra
Title: Down The Beaten Road
Rating: Solid PG-13 so far… it will progress though(adult situations)
Summary: An unexpected life comes when two of the Roswellian gang are forced into a difficult situation after a night of lust.
Category: M&M
Feedback: Please. Iris2003gl@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: Roswell and its characters are property of UPN, Jason Katims, and Melinda Metz
Author's Note: I wrote this fic for a specific purpose. After a day of reading fanfic I realized how much all those happily ever after teen pregnancy storied make me want to gag. I myself am not a pregnant teen but real life doesn't work out in a fairy tale ending. My purpose was to write the story and yes have the alien other wordly Roswell vibe but also depict a more realistic story. I also experimented with the duel POV thing so tell me what you think. Enjoy!
Dedications: To all the TRUEbies, Courtney, Liz especially for betaing and giving me feedback, and Laura. Also to Lindsay who actually is a teen mother, as well as Sonya who gave me the idea for this story.
Part 1
"Michael..." The words seemed to just flow. I didn't know where they came from.
It was one of those moments when time just slows down. There's no controlling it. Each moment plays out over an eternity, each word uttered takes days to complete. I swallowed hard and fought newly emerging tears. I had to be strong.
I just stared up at him. "I didn't even think I should tell you this, I mean you already have so much going on, but it wouldn't be right if I didn't." Breathe, I told myself. Just breathe. "I think I'm..." My voice just stopped. It didn't skip or fade out, it just stopped.
Deep breath. "I think I'm..." Why was so hard? Shouldn't it be a little easier than this? "I think that I could possibly be..." That's a lie, in fact I was almost certain I was." I am pregnant."
I somehow thought just saying it would make me feel a little better, it didn't. God and the way he looked at me. It just made it worse. I bet he thought I did it on purpose. Just so he'd have to stick around. Maybe I should've lied just so he could choose to leave.
Uncomfortable silence inevitably followed. "I just thought you should know. I don't expect anything. I mean I am perfectly capable of handling things by myself."
Oh I had a smart choice of words. I was sure he'd probably start running fro the door, after all that's what Michael Guerin did best, run. His gaze stayed unwavering. I couldn't help but squirm.
In one simple gesture he grabbed my arm pulling me into his chest and holding me tightly. I hadn't pictured this scenario. I let the warmth of his body heat mine. I felt him kiss the top of my head.
"I'm scared Michael." I looked up. I could feel the tears running down my cheeks. Michael nodded.
Somehow most of my night ended up being spent in Michael's arms, Michael's warm, strong, amazing arms, and there things didn't seem as terrible.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I was just waiting for one of Maria's rants. I hadn't expected what she was saying. My mind began to race off into a thousand different places. Why? When? I mean we were always careful, at least I thought we were. And of all times for this to come this was not a great time.
I watched her mouth as she said my name.
"Michael..."
I didn't understand what was so hard about talking until I found out what she was trying to say. I think I got it at the second attempt. I stood there like an idiot. I should've said something. After a few moments of brain freeze she started in again. She had just said the most horrifying three worlds of any words that could ever be uttered.
I knew what she was saying was true, she could take care of herself, but I didn't want her to. I want to be the one to take care of her. I brought her into my embrace. I thought maybe it would calm both of us down.
She was scared she told me so. The shock hadn't set in for me yet. Otherwise I would've been scared out of my mind. I mean I was a senior in high school, which of course was bad enough, but add all the alien crap, and things were just complicated.
The only thing I could think about was Maria right now though. Skins didn't matter, Khivar didn't matter, Liz, Isabel, Max, and Tess couldn't matter right now.
"I'm scared." The words were imprinted on my brain replaying over and over like a broken record. Scared was an understatement. Terrified, horrified, shocked, and nauseated fit well, but not scared. Scared was what you felt about a playground bully or Hank, take your pick. This was a moment that would change my life, a consequence coming back to haunt me.
"I should tell Max." I whispered to her.
She shook her head in my chest.
"Please don't Michael." I felt my heart sink.
"Ok, I won't."
She pulled away moving her eyes to meet mine. "Lets go...Lets just leave. We could make a new life. I mean stay here a couple weeks then just leave. Pick a town and go."
"Maria, I don't know if...I mean what about..." I stopped. How could I say no. It was all in her eyes, every reason I should go with her and just forget about Roswell and a chance at going home. I nodded.
"Lets go."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Are you sure? It's not too late to turn back."
I watched as the sign moved further and further away. 'Thank You for Visiting Roswell Come Again."
She nodded. "I'm sure. I've never been more sure." Somehow a little unsure ness must've surfaced during that spiel.
The rest of the four-hour drive went incredibly fast. With the occasional whimper of hunger Maria and I were silent. The stillness was an uncomfortable at first but it soon became relaxing. "Michael I'm sorry." Her voice was quiet as we pulled into the motel parking lot.
I parked and stood there. What was I supposed to do? My mind searched rapidly for something to say.
"I never ever wanted this. I am just sorry to drag you away from everything."
I closed my eyes leaning my forehead against the smooth leather of the steering wheel.
"Maria," I sat up urging he chin towards me, "this isn't exactly what I had in mind either, but I got it. I know we can do this. " I tried to smile. I was never very good at this comforting thing. It just wasn't me.
"Michael what about school? What about a life? Maybe you were right. Maybe leaving was a bad idea. We don't even have jobs."
The words stung. What if we were wrong? What happened then? We had no friends or family, no one to turn to. "We have to be strong." I grabbed for her hand. "I promise Maria, nothing bad will happen." I tried to smile but it just didn't work out.
She tried to return the gesture half hearted. "Lets go inside." I felt the car give a slight rattle as she slammed her car door. I mimicked her motions as we ran into the motel.
The room was cheesy to say the least. The fabric of the comforter had quite a few spots on it; the curtains had a thick layer of dust coating the polyester designs, and a scent of mold. "Home sweet home." I mumbled under my breath.
Maria sat on the bed laying her head against one of the pillows. I moved next to her lying on my stomach.
"I have something for you." I reached into my back pocket pulling out a small envelope that had been folded.
I watched as her slender fingers carefully smoothed the edges and opened the crisp paper. "It's a license."
I nodded.
"A license for Elizabeth Ross."
I nodded again.
"Who is Elizabeth Ross?" She hesitated.
"Am I Elizabeth Ross?"
I nodded again.
I pulled out mine, handing it to her quickly.
"Your Darick Ross? Why these names?"
"I figured someone's going to eventually come looking."
She nodded putting the license in her handbag. She rested one hand on her stomach and one on the bed. I reached my hand to the one on her stomach, touching it lightly.
"Our baby's in there?"
She nodded. "Michael...It isn't too late to go back. I could always take care of this baby there...or maybe even..." She stopped and I was glad she did. I didn't want to hear the rest. That was a terrible idea. I mean two high school seniors raising a child was bad but just throwing away a life... that was even worse.
I shook my head. "We can do this." My eyes met her's and her lips began to curve into a smile. That moment quickly broke away.
"Have you considered the fact that this child is going to be... half...you know?"
That had sort of slipped my mind. Of course I mean somewhere deep down I had realized it, the idea just hadn't surfaced. I could feel the pit of my stomach churn.
"I mean they do blood tests and things like that when babies are born." She stopped. I guess she could see the fear that had just slammed into my chest.
"What are we going to do?" Her eyes were big and bright, filled with just as much fear as my body.
"I don't know. But whatever we do we do it together."
*~*~*~*~*~*~
Roswell was behind now. I was on the road. I looked over to Michael, his gaze never unchanging from the road. He acted completely indifferent. I gave an occasional stir to break the silence.
"Are you sure?"
I nodded and mumbled under my breath. Inhale, exhale, I told myself.
"Michael, I'm sorry." I blurted out as we pulled into the parking lot of some less than one star hotel.
He sat there quiet, so I continued. "I never wanted this. I didn't mean to drag you away from everything."
We finally got in the hotel room. My body was completely stiff. He said a few words but my mind had already begun to wander.
"Michael what about school? What about a life? Maybe you were right. Maybe leaving was a bad idea. We don't even have jobs."
All the 'What ifs' had inevitably began to sink in. I felt hot tears sting at my eyes. I knew he had to be thinking the same thing I was.
I felt his strong, warm fingers wrap around my hand.
"We have to be strong. I promise Maria, nothing bad will happen." He was trying, he was trying really hard. But deep down I knew, I could see it in his eyes, he was just as scared as me. We were separated from our friends, family, everything that as vaguely familiar.
I tried I really did, I tried to return his smile, it just didn't happen. There was nothing to smile about. Our lives had just basically ended.
When we got in the hotel room there was an apparent thin sheet of dust covering everything. The curtains had to have been up since 1970 and the comforter had odd stains all over it.
As I lay down on the bed Michael joined me. "I have something for you?"
He handed me a small envelope. I opened it slowly and pulled the first object out. "Its a license."
"A license for Elizabeth Ross."
"Who is Elizabeth Ross?"
I stopped. Elizabeth Ross. I had no idea who that was. My mind raced trying to think of some significance of the name. My heart stopped as I saw the picture. It was me.
"Am I Elizabeth Ross?"
He nodded pulling out his own fake license. "You're Darick Ross. Why these names?"
He moved his gaze away. "I figured someone would eventually come looking."
I felt his the rough skin of his palm on my stomach. I closed my eyes.
"Our baby's in there?"
My mind went blank. I couldn't really say anything. I just hesitantly moved my head up and down. I could feel my chest tighten. Somewhere the idea popped into my head. I didn't want to say. I never even considered the option. It really hadn't been one until that moment.
""Michael...It isn't too late to go back. I could always take care of this baby there...or maybe even..."
I stopped. I just couldn't get the words out. Its not even that I really stopped talking, my voice just stopped. It killed me to even think about that option.
"No," Michael shook his head. "We can do this." He smiled. He actually smiled. I didn't really think that was possible under the circumstances.
"Have you considered the fact that this child is going to be... half...you know?" I really didn't know where that idea came from. Even though I am sure it should've hit me a lot sooner. I mean it's not everyday that a human alien hybrid is born.
"I mean they do do blood tests and things like that when babies are born." Somehow memories of the whole sex ed in 9th grade came back haunting me. All the labor and hopsital procedures flew through my mind.
"What are we going to do, Michael?"
"I don't know. But whatever we do we do it together."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I held my hand over my stomach. I as just waiting for some sort of signal from my unborn child, maybe a kick, maybe not. I was about three months pregnant. I stepped into the small green apartment. Yeah Green. Never my dream house but we had to make do.
The last three months had been hard. We'd already been through four towns just so Mich...I mean Darick could find work. He told me not to call him Michael anymore. That was in the past and we couldn't live there. We had to live in the now.
Yeah the now looked real bright. I managed to get a job at some grease joint on the outskirts of good ol' Russellville Arkansas. I had to admit though pay at "The House of Fry" was better than any of the fast food joints gave. Darick was out looking for a job still. He thought maybe construction.
"Hey," I threw the mail down onto the small coffee table at the corner of the apartment. "Good day?"
He shook his head. I lower my eyes from him. He was never in a real great mood after the "rejection days". I looked at him, he changed. It had only been three months but he'd changed so much. When we left he'd still been a boy. Now I stood staring at him, realizing he was no longer the immature little boy I'd left with.
His shoulders had gotten a little broader. His eyes, they weren't really the eyes of a lost boy anymore, maybe more of a lost soul. The pregnancy was having some very profound affects on us both. Somehow he couldn't even bring himself to touch me anymore. He could barely look at me.
At night we'd lay in the same bed but there was almost a million miles between us. He was puling away. Sometimes I could hear him murmur in his sleep, small little whimpers and cries of pain. I still think I am the one that caused that. I don't know how many nights, in our small green cockroach infested apartment he'd wake up with cold sweat.
"Anything on TV?"
He shook his head again. I closed my eyes wishing I had one friend I could talk to. Liz was galaxies away. Not literally of course. I mean, Roswell was only a few states away but I could never turn back. It was too late.
"Put in anymore applications?"
"yeah, there's a new tar factory opening outside of town. I put in two more at the tire place and at the garage."
I took and big gulp of air. "I was thinking of names?" Inhale. Exhale.
His eyes stayed on the television screen.
"But apparently you don't care so I am just going to go and hit the hay." I made a fake stretch and walked down the hallway. Our wallpaper was beginning to peel from the walls. there was nothing like trailer park Arkansas. Nothing.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I watched Maria walk in. I couldn't look at her. I was afraid if I did I'd never be able to look away. Sometimes, though, when we were lying in bed and I was sure she wasn't looking, I would sneak a glance. I'd fight so hard just to not touch her. not to let my fingers run over the bare skin of her arm or her cheek.
I could feel Maria's eyes burning into me. There were like an x-ray, penetrating my flesh. I gave a few one word replies. She said something about names...and bed. I'd be there later, much later. IN fact maybe not at all, the couch seemed like a safe distance tonight. Tonight was one of the irresistible nights.
I flipped through the "crap" of late night television. Nothing but non-stop infomercials. Sometimes I just had an urge to pick up the phone and dial for Max. I just wanted to hear his voice, I needed to hear his voice. Once I'd actually called just to hear him say hi and then I hung up. Yeah, I know, real cool. Real Mature.
The fact was though, I was only an eighteen-year-old boy. Was I supposed to be mature? Was I supposed to be a man? A father? A husband?
Granted Maria and I were only married in our fake lives, I was still living the life of a tied down man. Not that I could ever desert Maria or anything. I would never do that. I just sometimes wish I hadn't gone down the road I did. Maybe we should have been more responsible. But too late now.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I could hear her screams form the couch. I didn't end up going to bed that night, and now looking back I wish I had. I could hear each shrill sound piercing the silence. I got up as fast as I could. I ran, actually I think I might've flown. I don't remember my feet ever hitting the ground.
I could see her small body twisting in pain underneath the sheets. "Maria..." I slipped. I forced her to call me Darick but then I called her Maria. It didn't matter though. "Maria." Her eyes weren't even open. I leaned forward scooping her body in my arms. "Maria look at me."
I moved her chin in line with my face. Her eyes opened finally. I could feel the sweat on her body. "What's wrong?"
Her lips moved like she wanted to talk, but she couldn't get the words out. Like it was a struggle. "Maria I'm here. You have to tell me what's wrong?" I could feel my heart jumping into my throat. "Is it..." I could feel hot tears sting my eyes. I pushed them back.
That was the longest night of my life. Miraculously we both survived. Sometimes I really thought I'd lose her. I'd talk to her when I knew she was asleep. Whisper stories to her, about when I first saw her. I thought she was crazy, maybe not crazy, but definitely odd.
she had changed so much. She wasn't the weak oddball she was when I first met her. She was strong. She was so strong. She has been my lifeline the last year we were in Roswell. My reason for existence. Max had his own problems but I had Maria.
And then I had to look at her, reduced to a sickly corpse. There was really nothing I could do. I tried to heal her, I wasn't able to. I wasn't Max. I really wanted to just put my hand over her and make her ok. I tired, it didn't work.
Sometimes when she'd relapse into the pains, I would try to heal her, knowing I couldn't do anything. Sometimes, God knows I knew that it wasn't her fault, but I'd blame her. I'd hold her and think, "If she wouldn't have gotten ..." I never really completed that thought though.
I remember our last night in the green house. I held Maria all night. I could see all the pain in her eyes. She let small whimpers and moans escape. I think she thought she had to be strong, for me. I held her. I told her we didn't have to pretend anymore. That she was just my Maria and I was her Michael." I whispered stories that were almost like a far off life. Even though it had been our own.
"Maria, you're strong. You'll get through this." I could feel wetness on my face. "Maria I love you." I knew the next morning we'd be leaving again, I wasn't sure if Maria could travel next door though, much less to another state.
*~*~*~*
Chapter 2 coming soon.
Title: Down The Beaten Road
Rating: Solid PG-13 so far… it will progress though(adult situations)
Summary: An unexpected life comes when two of the Roswellian gang are forced into a difficult situation after a night of lust.
Category: M&M
Feedback: Please. Iris2003gl@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: Roswell and its characters are property of UPN, Jason Katims, and Melinda Metz
Author's Note: I wrote this fic for a specific purpose. After a day of reading fanfic I realized how much all those happily ever after teen pregnancy storied make me want to gag. I myself am not a pregnant teen but real life doesn't work out in a fairy tale ending. My purpose was to write the story and yes have the alien other wordly Roswell vibe but also depict a more realistic story. I also experimented with the duel POV thing so tell me what you think. Enjoy!
Dedications: To all the TRUEbies, Courtney, Liz especially for betaing and giving me feedback, and Laura. Also to Lindsay who actually is a teen mother, as well as Sonya who gave me the idea for this story.
Part 1
"Michael..." The words seemed to just flow. I didn't know where they came from.
It was one of those moments when time just slows down. There's no controlling it. Each moment plays out over an eternity, each word uttered takes days to complete. I swallowed hard and fought newly emerging tears. I had to be strong.
I just stared up at him. "I didn't even think I should tell you this, I mean you already have so much going on, but it wouldn't be right if I didn't." Breathe, I told myself. Just breathe. "I think I'm..." My voice just stopped. It didn't skip or fade out, it just stopped.
Deep breath. "I think I'm..." Why was so hard? Shouldn't it be a little easier than this? "I think that I could possibly be..." That's a lie, in fact I was almost certain I was." I am pregnant."
I somehow thought just saying it would make me feel a little better, it didn't. God and the way he looked at me. It just made it worse. I bet he thought I did it on purpose. Just so he'd have to stick around. Maybe I should've lied just so he could choose to leave.
Uncomfortable silence inevitably followed. "I just thought you should know. I don't expect anything. I mean I am perfectly capable of handling things by myself."
Oh I had a smart choice of words. I was sure he'd probably start running fro the door, after all that's what Michael Guerin did best, run. His gaze stayed unwavering. I couldn't help but squirm.
In one simple gesture he grabbed my arm pulling me into his chest and holding me tightly. I hadn't pictured this scenario. I let the warmth of his body heat mine. I felt him kiss the top of my head.
"I'm scared Michael." I looked up. I could feel the tears running down my cheeks. Michael nodded.
Somehow most of my night ended up being spent in Michael's arms, Michael's warm, strong, amazing arms, and there things didn't seem as terrible.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I was just waiting for one of Maria's rants. I hadn't expected what she was saying. My mind began to race off into a thousand different places. Why? When? I mean we were always careful, at least I thought we were. And of all times for this to come this was not a great time.
I watched her mouth as she said my name.
"Michael..."
I didn't understand what was so hard about talking until I found out what she was trying to say. I think I got it at the second attempt. I stood there like an idiot. I should've said something. After a few moments of brain freeze she started in again. She had just said the most horrifying three worlds of any words that could ever be uttered.
I knew what she was saying was true, she could take care of herself, but I didn't want her to. I want to be the one to take care of her. I brought her into my embrace. I thought maybe it would calm both of us down.
She was scared she told me so. The shock hadn't set in for me yet. Otherwise I would've been scared out of my mind. I mean I was a senior in high school, which of course was bad enough, but add all the alien crap, and things were just complicated.
The only thing I could think about was Maria right now though. Skins didn't matter, Khivar didn't matter, Liz, Isabel, Max, and Tess couldn't matter right now.
"I'm scared." The words were imprinted on my brain replaying over and over like a broken record. Scared was an understatement. Terrified, horrified, shocked, and nauseated fit well, but not scared. Scared was what you felt about a playground bully or Hank, take your pick. This was a moment that would change my life, a consequence coming back to haunt me.
"I should tell Max." I whispered to her.
She shook her head in my chest.
"Please don't Michael." I felt my heart sink.
"Ok, I won't."
She pulled away moving her eyes to meet mine. "Lets go...Lets just leave. We could make a new life. I mean stay here a couple weeks then just leave. Pick a town and go."
"Maria, I don't know if...I mean what about..." I stopped. How could I say no. It was all in her eyes, every reason I should go with her and just forget about Roswell and a chance at going home. I nodded.
"Lets go."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Are you sure? It's not too late to turn back."
I watched as the sign moved further and further away. 'Thank You for Visiting Roswell Come Again."
She nodded. "I'm sure. I've never been more sure." Somehow a little unsure ness must've surfaced during that spiel.
The rest of the four-hour drive went incredibly fast. With the occasional whimper of hunger Maria and I were silent. The stillness was an uncomfortable at first but it soon became relaxing. "Michael I'm sorry." Her voice was quiet as we pulled into the motel parking lot.
I parked and stood there. What was I supposed to do? My mind searched rapidly for something to say.
"I never ever wanted this. I am just sorry to drag you away from everything."
I closed my eyes leaning my forehead against the smooth leather of the steering wheel.
"Maria," I sat up urging he chin towards me, "this isn't exactly what I had in mind either, but I got it. I know we can do this. " I tried to smile. I was never very good at this comforting thing. It just wasn't me.
"Michael what about school? What about a life? Maybe you were right. Maybe leaving was a bad idea. We don't even have jobs."
The words stung. What if we were wrong? What happened then? We had no friends or family, no one to turn to. "We have to be strong." I grabbed for her hand. "I promise Maria, nothing bad will happen." I tried to smile but it just didn't work out.
She tried to return the gesture half hearted. "Lets go inside." I felt the car give a slight rattle as she slammed her car door. I mimicked her motions as we ran into the motel.
The room was cheesy to say the least. The fabric of the comforter had quite a few spots on it; the curtains had a thick layer of dust coating the polyester designs, and a scent of mold. "Home sweet home." I mumbled under my breath.
Maria sat on the bed laying her head against one of the pillows. I moved next to her lying on my stomach.
"I have something for you." I reached into my back pocket pulling out a small envelope that had been folded.
I watched as her slender fingers carefully smoothed the edges and opened the crisp paper. "It's a license."
I nodded.
"A license for Elizabeth Ross."
I nodded again.
"Who is Elizabeth Ross?" She hesitated.
"Am I Elizabeth Ross?"
I nodded again.
I pulled out mine, handing it to her quickly.
"Your Darick Ross? Why these names?"
"I figured someone's going to eventually come looking."
She nodded putting the license in her handbag. She rested one hand on her stomach and one on the bed. I reached my hand to the one on her stomach, touching it lightly.
"Our baby's in there?"
She nodded. "Michael...It isn't too late to go back. I could always take care of this baby there...or maybe even..." She stopped and I was glad she did. I didn't want to hear the rest. That was a terrible idea. I mean two high school seniors raising a child was bad but just throwing away a life... that was even worse.
I shook my head. "We can do this." My eyes met her's and her lips began to curve into a smile. That moment quickly broke away.
"Have you considered the fact that this child is going to be... half...you know?"
That had sort of slipped my mind. Of course I mean somewhere deep down I had realized it, the idea just hadn't surfaced. I could feel the pit of my stomach churn.
"I mean they do blood tests and things like that when babies are born." She stopped. I guess she could see the fear that had just slammed into my chest.
"What are we going to do?" Her eyes were big and bright, filled with just as much fear as my body.
"I don't know. But whatever we do we do it together."
*~*~*~*~*~*~
Roswell was behind now. I was on the road. I looked over to Michael, his gaze never unchanging from the road. He acted completely indifferent. I gave an occasional stir to break the silence.
"Are you sure?"
I nodded and mumbled under my breath. Inhale, exhale, I told myself.
"Michael, I'm sorry." I blurted out as we pulled into the parking lot of some less than one star hotel.
He sat there quiet, so I continued. "I never wanted this. I didn't mean to drag you away from everything."
We finally got in the hotel room. My body was completely stiff. He said a few words but my mind had already begun to wander.
"Michael what about school? What about a life? Maybe you were right. Maybe leaving was a bad idea. We don't even have jobs."
All the 'What ifs' had inevitably began to sink in. I felt hot tears sting at my eyes. I knew he had to be thinking the same thing I was.
I felt his strong, warm fingers wrap around my hand.
"We have to be strong. I promise Maria, nothing bad will happen." He was trying, he was trying really hard. But deep down I knew, I could see it in his eyes, he was just as scared as me. We were separated from our friends, family, everything that as vaguely familiar.
I tried I really did, I tried to return his smile, it just didn't happen. There was nothing to smile about. Our lives had just basically ended.
When we got in the hotel room there was an apparent thin sheet of dust covering everything. The curtains had to have been up since 1970 and the comforter had odd stains all over it.
As I lay down on the bed Michael joined me. "I have something for you?"
He handed me a small envelope. I opened it slowly and pulled the first object out. "Its a license."
"A license for Elizabeth Ross."
"Who is Elizabeth Ross?"
I stopped. Elizabeth Ross. I had no idea who that was. My mind raced trying to think of some significance of the name. My heart stopped as I saw the picture. It was me.
"Am I Elizabeth Ross?"
He nodded pulling out his own fake license. "You're Darick Ross. Why these names?"
He moved his gaze away. "I figured someone would eventually come looking."
I felt his the rough skin of his palm on my stomach. I closed my eyes.
"Our baby's in there?"
My mind went blank. I couldn't really say anything. I just hesitantly moved my head up and down. I could feel my chest tighten. Somewhere the idea popped into my head. I didn't want to say. I never even considered the option. It really hadn't been one until that moment.
""Michael...It isn't too late to go back. I could always take care of this baby there...or maybe even..."
I stopped. I just couldn't get the words out. Its not even that I really stopped talking, my voice just stopped. It killed me to even think about that option.
"No," Michael shook his head. "We can do this." He smiled. He actually smiled. I didn't really think that was possible under the circumstances.
"Have you considered the fact that this child is going to be... half...you know?" I really didn't know where that idea came from. Even though I am sure it should've hit me a lot sooner. I mean it's not everyday that a human alien hybrid is born.
"I mean they do do blood tests and things like that when babies are born." Somehow memories of the whole sex ed in 9th grade came back haunting me. All the labor and hopsital procedures flew through my mind.
"What are we going to do, Michael?"
"I don't know. But whatever we do we do it together."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I held my hand over my stomach. I as just waiting for some sort of signal from my unborn child, maybe a kick, maybe not. I was about three months pregnant. I stepped into the small green apartment. Yeah Green. Never my dream house but we had to make do.
The last three months had been hard. We'd already been through four towns just so Mich...I mean Darick could find work. He told me not to call him Michael anymore. That was in the past and we couldn't live there. We had to live in the now.
Yeah the now looked real bright. I managed to get a job at some grease joint on the outskirts of good ol' Russellville Arkansas. I had to admit though pay at "The House of Fry" was better than any of the fast food joints gave. Darick was out looking for a job still. He thought maybe construction.
"Hey," I threw the mail down onto the small coffee table at the corner of the apartment. "Good day?"
He shook his head. I lower my eyes from him. He was never in a real great mood after the "rejection days". I looked at him, he changed. It had only been three months but he'd changed so much. When we left he'd still been a boy. Now I stood staring at him, realizing he was no longer the immature little boy I'd left with.
His shoulders had gotten a little broader. His eyes, they weren't really the eyes of a lost boy anymore, maybe more of a lost soul. The pregnancy was having some very profound affects on us both. Somehow he couldn't even bring himself to touch me anymore. He could barely look at me.
At night we'd lay in the same bed but there was almost a million miles between us. He was puling away. Sometimes I could hear him murmur in his sleep, small little whimpers and cries of pain. I still think I am the one that caused that. I don't know how many nights, in our small green cockroach infested apartment he'd wake up with cold sweat.
"Anything on TV?"
He shook his head again. I closed my eyes wishing I had one friend I could talk to. Liz was galaxies away. Not literally of course. I mean, Roswell was only a few states away but I could never turn back. It was too late.
"Put in anymore applications?"
"yeah, there's a new tar factory opening outside of town. I put in two more at the tire place and at the garage."
I took and big gulp of air. "I was thinking of names?" Inhale. Exhale.
His eyes stayed on the television screen.
"But apparently you don't care so I am just going to go and hit the hay." I made a fake stretch and walked down the hallway. Our wallpaper was beginning to peel from the walls. there was nothing like trailer park Arkansas. Nothing.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I watched Maria walk in. I couldn't look at her. I was afraid if I did I'd never be able to look away. Sometimes, though, when we were lying in bed and I was sure she wasn't looking, I would sneak a glance. I'd fight so hard just to not touch her. not to let my fingers run over the bare skin of her arm or her cheek.
I could feel Maria's eyes burning into me. There were like an x-ray, penetrating my flesh. I gave a few one word replies. She said something about names...and bed. I'd be there later, much later. IN fact maybe not at all, the couch seemed like a safe distance tonight. Tonight was one of the irresistible nights.
I flipped through the "crap" of late night television. Nothing but non-stop infomercials. Sometimes I just had an urge to pick up the phone and dial for Max. I just wanted to hear his voice, I needed to hear his voice. Once I'd actually called just to hear him say hi and then I hung up. Yeah, I know, real cool. Real Mature.
The fact was though, I was only an eighteen-year-old boy. Was I supposed to be mature? Was I supposed to be a man? A father? A husband?
Granted Maria and I were only married in our fake lives, I was still living the life of a tied down man. Not that I could ever desert Maria or anything. I would never do that. I just sometimes wish I hadn't gone down the road I did. Maybe we should have been more responsible. But too late now.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I could hear her screams form the couch. I didn't end up going to bed that night, and now looking back I wish I had. I could hear each shrill sound piercing the silence. I got up as fast as I could. I ran, actually I think I might've flown. I don't remember my feet ever hitting the ground.
I could see her small body twisting in pain underneath the sheets. "Maria..." I slipped. I forced her to call me Darick but then I called her Maria. It didn't matter though. "Maria." Her eyes weren't even open. I leaned forward scooping her body in my arms. "Maria look at me."
I moved her chin in line with my face. Her eyes opened finally. I could feel the sweat on her body. "What's wrong?"
Her lips moved like she wanted to talk, but she couldn't get the words out. Like it was a struggle. "Maria I'm here. You have to tell me what's wrong?" I could feel my heart jumping into my throat. "Is it..." I could feel hot tears sting my eyes. I pushed them back.
That was the longest night of my life. Miraculously we both survived. Sometimes I really thought I'd lose her. I'd talk to her when I knew she was asleep. Whisper stories to her, about when I first saw her. I thought she was crazy, maybe not crazy, but definitely odd.
she had changed so much. She wasn't the weak oddball she was when I first met her. She was strong. She was so strong. She has been my lifeline the last year we were in Roswell. My reason for existence. Max had his own problems but I had Maria.
And then I had to look at her, reduced to a sickly corpse. There was really nothing I could do. I tried to heal her, I wasn't able to. I wasn't Max. I really wanted to just put my hand over her and make her ok. I tired, it didn't work.
Sometimes when she'd relapse into the pains, I would try to heal her, knowing I couldn't do anything. Sometimes, God knows I knew that it wasn't her fault, but I'd blame her. I'd hold her and think, "If she wouldn't have gotten ..." I never really completed that thought though.
I remember our last night in the green house. I held Maria all night. I could see all the pain in her eyes. She let small whimpers and moans escape. I think she thought she had to be strong, for me. I held her. I told her we didn't have to pretend anymore. That she was just my Maria and I was her Michael." I whispered stories that were almost like a far off life. Even though it had been our own.
"Maria, you're strong. You'll get through this." I could feel wetness on my face. "Maria I love you." I knew the next morning we'd be leaving again, I wasn't sure if Maria could travel next door though, much less to another state.
*~*~*~*
Chapter 2 coming soon.