Even when he was gone, the honey-and-summer scent of him still bathed her room. It tricked her into thinking he was with her, and her heart jumped as though he was actually close enough to touch. She lay stretched out on her bed, her slender limbs extended to cover the whole mattress. Her head was buzzing with him. She hadn't closed her eyelids once all night and it was somewhere in the small hours, or felt like it, at least. She twisted her neck away from clinging strands of brown hair and looked hopefully out the open window. Hoping the chilly night wind had blown her Edward from his hunting. The frame of sky was empty, and black as a new chalkboard. She wondered about closing the window, but didn't. It wasn't that cold, not for a girl who slept in a vampire's arms, and she liked the invitation the open window represented. It was waiting for him, as much as she was. A sigh filled her bedroom and she let her head flop back onto the pillow. He wasn't due back 'til tomorrow evening. She had hours of tension to endure before she could touch him. It wasn't like she could really touch him, anyway. It wasn't like there would be much alleviation in tension. Edward and his rules...
She derailed the thought before it could follow that bitter old track, and rolled over to wallow in self-pity. Her legs tangled in the sheets and she kicked them loose furiously, wresting them free. Her legs were pasty white on the purple bedspread, and goosebumped. She bent forward, rubbing her calves to warm them. Her hands drifted upwards, one curving around the back of her knee while the other went further, finding the edge of her Buffy pyjama shorts.
You're not going to...?
Fear, excitement and uncertainty mixed oddly in her blood. Her hands tugged the shorts down her legs by the waistband, and she kicked her feet out of them once they slipped past her knees, then tossed them to the carpet. They were untidy and lonely in the centre of Bella's clean floor. She suddenly felt ridiculous and very cold, kneeling on her bed wearing nothing but a tank top. Pink blush crept up her cheeks and she almost got up and put her shorts back on. But something made her pause and move her hand to the join between her thigh and crotch, below her hip. Her body was much warmer than her hand. She flinched at the cold but kept her palm pressed to the top of her leg. Then she carefully stroked her skin, rubbing up and down along the edge of the triangle, first with her entire hand then with just her fingertips lightly brushing along the line. The barest of touches made her tingle, like something was fizzing beneath her skin. Her legs slid further apart, seemingly of their own accord, and her hand slipped between. It was only then she noticed how uneven her breaths were. Her hand stilled on her thigh and the fizzing feeling numbed. Bella swallowed, not wanting the feeling to end but afraid...nervous...she didn't even know how to touch herself there. She took a deep breath, trying to settle herself, and the sweet, intoxicating smell of Edward filled her lungs. Her eyelids flickered half-closed, then open and she twirled one finger in a quick circle around her clit. It pulsed and Bella was intrigued. She traced the circle again, twice, then ran her finger along the softer flesh between her legs. Her hips jerked, and she was taken off guard, but she didn't stop. She rubbed her full hand against herself, and pressed down on her clit. She moved her hips in a rhythm they seemed to find themselves, lifting her lower back right off the bed. She was actually wet down there, really wet, dripping with a liquid more viscous than water. She moved two of her now-slick fingers to fork on either side of her clit. It throbbed harder, and her hips kept moving. Her nipples were hard. She breathed deeply, this time intentionally, and when she could taste Edward on her tongue she pictured him, his full lips lifted in his smug crooked smile, his fiery topaz eyes intent on her and heated. She panted, lying her head back on the pillow, and remembered the feel of his hard stone body against every line of hers, pushing down on her. Without conscious command, her fingers seemed to move to her slit and slip in, first one pulsing in and out quickly, faster than her frantic thrusting, then two. She could feel her skin stretching ad it felt so good. Everything felt so good. She rolled off her back and crawled onto her knees, bending. She would have leant on her hands but they were busy, one half inside her and the other palming her breast, pulling at her nipple. She was glad they were cold now. They could almost have been Edward's hands roughly groping her body, making her feel electric. She thrust down on her fingers with more force and her changed position drove them deeper. Something between a whimper and a groan came from her parted lips. She thought of Edward's cold hands and hard muscles and hot eyes. A memory of his musical voice surfaced in her mind.
"I've never wanted a human's blood so much."
Memory-Edward's voice was dark with suppressed desire, especially where it licked at her name. It annihilated her. She fell over the edge into a place without words.
When Bella came back, she was exhausted and more satisfied than she'd ever been before. Incredible, she thought drowsily. She fell back onto the mattress, avoiding the wet patch, and pulled the covers over her. I have to do that again, she mused. For a bibliophile, I'm already very fond of the place without words.
As she drifted to sleep, she imagined a pair of eyes like golden flames in the dark, watching her.