(A/N: PLEASE READ! Ughhh okay so I have a few important things I gotta clear up; I'll hit most of them after the chapter, but first of all I HAVE to get this one disclaimer out: THIS IS NOT A SHIP FIC. THERE IS NO SLASH HERE. Not to risk spoiling too much, but there's going to be a *lot* of ~platonic fluff~ in the third [final] chapter. If you don't think you can read that without interpreting it romantically/sexually, please don't read the fic. Thank you! Now I'll stop taking up your time and get to the actual writing.)
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"WHO TOOK THE LAST CHOCOLATE-CHIP COOKIE?!"
I turned my body slightly to see a fiery haired, fiery tempered ninja of fire looking like he was ready to burn the place down. Not incredibly surprising.
"SERIOUSLY, WHO TOOK IT? I WILL FIGHT YOU. I WILL FIGHT YOU RIGHT NOW," he continued, his eyes burning with anger.
"For the last time, NONE of us were in the kitchen when it went missing. If you'd just let this go—" Jay started, unwisely letting himself get distracted from our chess game. Cole, who was watching, immediately joined him in his criticism.
"Jay is right, Kai," he said. "You've been going on about this way too long."
"Oh, really?" the hothead said, putting his hands on his hips. His scowling expression shifted into a smirk. "Seems to me like whoever's to blame is just scared of being found out."
Having already endured many long, similar arguments, I debated quietly with myself for a few minutes whether or not to say anything on the matter, but by the time I'd made up my mind, the others were already knee-deep in argument.
"I am not scared of fighting you!" Jay yelled.
"Oh really? Then why are you so hesitant to duel? I KNOW you're guilty!" Kai shouted back.
"Not everything has to be resolved with a fight, Kai!" Cole said angrily. "And I LOVE to fight, so that's saying a lot!"
"Then you shouldn't have a problem with me!" Kai retorted. I caught a hint of frustration in his voice, as if he legitimately wanted one of the boys to start brawling with him, which he probably did. I briefly wondered why. I'd never understood why people would fight over such trivial matters— then again, I'd never understood a lot of things about people. There were plenty of customs and behaviors that everybody else seemed perfectly accustomed to which had always come across to me as foreign. But at least after all these years, I finally knew why I didn't understand so much. The traditions of human behavior didn't all come naturally to me. Suddenly— perhaps because I was standing too close to Jay— a bolt of inspiration struck.
I'm an android, right? That means my analytical skills are higher than those of even an above average human… what if I could use them to figure out why my teammates act the way they do?
I'd never tried analyzing people the same way I analyzed problems or battle tactics, but the idea wasn't inconceivable— Wu already pretty much did the same thing to an extent, right? He was always talking about "knowing thy enemy as well as thyself" and "walking a mile in someone else's shoes." The argument raged on, but for the time being, I decided to stay quiet and watch instead of getting involved. I kept my eyes peeled for any helpful information— I didn't really know what I was looking for, but I suppose I was "playing detective," so to speak.
"If you're innocent…"
"It's not ABOUT whether or not I'm innocent!"
"That's something a guilty person would say!"
"It's been over THREE HOURS since that cookie went missing, let it go!"
Arguments flew left and right, and Kai made it clear plenty of times that he'd rather have been throwing punches. Despite the fact that I could've easily broken the fight up, I forced myself to remain silent and out of the debate.
Focus, Zane. Right now, you're analyzing.
I decided to keep a mental list of the things I noticed, to help fight the temptation to jump into the conversation. Jay plays with his bandana when he's threatened directly. Cole leaps to Jay's defense quicker than he leaps to his own. When two people start talking at once, they both get louder as if that's somehow going to prove their point. I found the details fascinating, and soon it wasn't difficult to keep myself an observer rather than a debater.
That's when things started to get interesting. To my surprise, while I was specifically focused on Kai for a period of time, my little game of detective actually started to work. That is to say, I began picking up on little details about the quarrel that… well, that just didn't quite match up. I couldn't put my finger on it, but something about Kai was off. His tone shifts frequently between angry and teasing. Unlike the others, he occasionally hesitates for a split second before shouting his next point. He makes "fighting motions" more than is necessary to emphasize the fact that he wants to duel. And he seems less focused on proving who the suspect is than convincing them to fight him. Not any one thing in particular would have bothered me, but as a whole, Kai was just… off. There was something about him that I hadn't figured out yet— and once I realized that there was an unsolved mystery, I had to find out the answer.
"I'll fight you."
The argument dropped dead and all three heads spun around to look at me. I sat, perfectly calmly, apparently having just announced that Jay and Nya had actually gotten together (or something equally as unbelievable).
"Um… Zane just said that, right?" Jay asked in a half-whisper. Kai and Cole looked thrown off by my suggestion, too, but Kai recovered more quickly than the former two.
"So it was you who took the last cookie, huh?" Kai asked, folding his arms but not sounding nearly as cross as earlier. "Glad to see somebody here doesn't have trouble admitting when they're guilty." He put up his fists in a fighting stance. "C'mon, let's go. Me and you. Face your punishment like a man."
I reached out a hand and gently lowered his fists. I noted that he froze up a little at the unexpected non-fighting motion.
"I did not take the final confectionary treat," I said cooly, "Nor am I prepared to do battle at the moment. I will, however, be willing to test your strength against my own later tonight, given that there is proper structure to the duel."
Kai hesitated and shifted slightly uncomfortably. "But, like…still an actual fight, right? I don't want to be pushed into one of your fancy mind games," he said, making odd hand motions on the words 'fancy mind games' (which Jay snickered at).
I shook my head. "No, I am not speaking of a logic puzzle, although I do still think you would benefit from trying one at some point."
"Oh okay, good," Kai said, smirking, "then I'll kick your butt."
"I shall be prepared at 8:30," I said calmly.
"Fine by me. I'm going to go see if Nya or Lloyd took the last cookie. If it's my sister, I swear…" With that, he waved me off with a hand motion and left the room. Jay and Cole looked at me, dumbfounded.
"What was that!?" asked Jay.
"Yea, you're like, the most peaceful one out of all of us! How come you offered to fight him?" Cole added. "Especially if you aren't even to blame for Kai's behavior."
I felt a small smile sneak onto my face. "I do not know what you are talking about," I said, then added, "I am going to go find Nya. I believe she may have some information that will be of use to me." I got up to leave as well, very proud of my own playful behavior. I'd never understood why Nya kept her identity as Samurai X a secret, but now I was starting to see the appeal in having a secret mission.
"Hey, wait!" Jay called before I got too far, "We still need to finish our chess game!"
I stopped, turned around, walked back to the table, and moved one piece on the board.
"Checkmate," I said cheerfully. Then I left the duo to their gaping while I left to search for Nya.
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(A/N: I gotta be honest, I'm not thrilled with this chapter... Or the next one. But I can't post the fic without them and I've done all the editing that I can so this is what's here, I guess. Hope it's at least still enjoyable. l"D Oh, and also a disclaimer about the cover of this fic: it's really misleading. As are the first two chapters. As much as I like the "detective Zane" thing I accidentally came up with, it's not *supposed* to be the driving force of the fic. Guess that's what happens when you switch the POV to the less emotional character so that you don't die from embarrassment while writing platonic fluff… oh well. X'P Also, if you made it this far, I'm very impressed. I'll try not to have such long notes for the other chapters. *Hands you a cookie for putting up with me*)
