Hello!

So after so much procrastination revolving around writing FanFiction, I finally got off my lazy ass and decided to write something. I've had this idea in my head for a while now, just kind of waiting for someone to possibly write about the same thing. But no one did. So…I decided to take matters into my own hands. Yay!

SETTING THE STAGE: Obviously takes place 75 years after Breaking Dawn. The Cullens, plus Jacob, are back in Forks. Or somewhere by there. All of them attend High School, minus Carlisle and Esme, obviously.

Lets get on with the show!

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Twilight Saga.

The 75 Year Itch: Insanity ensues as the Cullens get ready for Edward and Bella's 75th wedding anniversary: by planning their marriage renewal! Can the Cullens prove to be successful wedding planners, or will the ups and downs of the wedding party have everybody wishing that they should've gone to Vegas? Canon, Post BD, Drabble Series.

Prologue - Happenings

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP-

An alabaster hand quickly slapped the alarm clock, leaving a slight dent on the snooze button. A muffled groan soon followed as the bronze-haired beauty fell back into a deep slumber. However this doze was short lived as a warm hand gently brushed away a bronze lock.

"Ness, its time to wake up…"

A slight stirring about the angelic face was the only response.

"Nessie…"

Her pink lips frowned as she mumbled, "No. Five more minutes." She snuggled herself into the warm arms of beau, nuzzling her cold face into the crook of his neck.

He chuckled. "Ah. So begins the daily battle. In one corner, Miss Renesmee Cullen, the sleeping beauty of the West. And in the other corner, time, reminding Miss Cullen that she has to get up and get herself ready for school. I wonder who will win?"

Renesmee sighed. "I vote to just stay home from school today. How about we stay here, just like this? I don't know about you, Jake, but cuddling sounds a lot better than going to school."

"As much as I love our current state of cuddling, I believe that if you don't get up soon, you'll have to face the annoyance of your overly-protective father. Or worse. Your Aunt." Jacob said jokingly.

"I heard that!" Alice called from downstairs.

Renesmee laughed, stretching her arms out wide. "Fine, fine. I'm getting up!"

With one swift motion, the white duvet was flung off of the two sleepy bodies, revealing Renesmee's pink pajama bottoms and white tank top as well as Jacob's black pajama pants. She couldn't help herself as her eyes grazed over Jacob's defined body with satisfaction.

This didn't go unnoticed. "Mesmerized, aren't you? I know, I can't help but look at my sexy body every time I walk past the mirror. Consider yourself lucky that you wake up to this," his muscular arm gestured to his abdominal region, "…every morning."

Snapping out of her haze, she offered a joking smile as she opened the curtains, inviting the little light the Washington overcast had to offer. "I wake up to that because I have to. Last time I checked, I'm your soul mate via freaky werewolf bounds; I have no recollection of me choosing you only, what, five minutes after being born and nearly killing my mother? Nice to know you used to have the hots for half-human babies."

Renesmee turned around, only to be confronted with Jacob's burly chest. Looking up, she saw a playful smile displayed on his warm lips. "Are you trying to say that you're dissatisfied with your lot, Miss Cullen?"

Reaching up on her tiptoes, she gave him a quick kiss. "Aside from the fact that your infatuation with me since birth could be considered pedophilia, I consider myself a lucky girl. So no, I'm not dissatisfied. I'm completely unworthy."

Jacob smiled. "You know, when you become all masochistic, you remind me so much of your dad…"

Her eyebrows furrowed. "Really? With the way he and my mom act around each other…being all lovey-dovey and crap…I can hardly imagine him being masochistic."

"Oh God. You have no idea how annoying he was before you came around…"

"Isabella, my love, my nightingale, my twinkling star in the night sky…would you wish to accompany me in hunting later this evening? Nothing satisfies me more than being in the glowing presence of my wonderful wife." Smooth lips made contact with the graceful palm before him.

"Why, of course Edward! How can I pass such a promising evening with my one and only true love? My reason of being? Oh Edward, a night without you would be a night without the stars or the moon! There are no words to describe the amount of love I feel for you!"

The T.V. remote was thrown on the ground. "Will you guys shut up! Its like I've been thrown into a nightmare full of sugary-sweet mementos and really bad clichés! Christ! Seventy-four years of this…this…ugh! And it hasn't gotten any better! Can I ever watch this fabulous woman in peace?!" In an instant, Emmett huffed out of the room, annoyed to no ends.

Edward laughed. "Success, my darling. We got the T.V. all to ourselves."

Bella giggled, resting her head on her husbands marble shoulder. "Emmett falls for it every time…I think we've gone pro in the art of clearing him out of a room. So how about changing the channel to something more entertaining?"

"Gladly. You would think Emmett would get sick of watching all these old Oprah reruns in the morning…"

Renesmee nearly collided with her uncle as he angrily turned the corner up the stairs. "Woah there Emmett! Whats up with you?"

Emmett crossed his arms. "Tell your parents that if I have to suffer through their nauseating PDA one more time, your Daddys shiny new Audi is gonna be at the bottom of the Puget Sound. I've missed three reruns of Oprah because of them!" He continued his bound up the stairs.

Renesmee could hear her parents laughing in the other room. Jacob stared after Emmett. "To think that a vampire of his size has an infatuation with Oprah reruns…he never ceases to amaze me."

They both followed into the next room to meet Edward and Bella. Caught up in each others embrace, the beautiful vampires continued to whisper and giggle to themselves, stealing kisses when the other wasn't looking. Renesmee couldn't help but smile; looking at her parents and how they overcame all odds to be with each other gave her immense hope that her relationship with Jacob will last for an eternity as well.

Jacob cleared his throat, clearly unfazed by the usual act. "Well, good morning to you two. Glad to know we are all getting a recap of yet another passionate night between you guys."

Edward looked up. "Oh really? Don't think that I don't know what you guys do behind closed doors." He made a tapping gesture to his forehead. "Next time, keep your morning thoughts about my daughter G-Rated."

Renesmee couldn't help but blush. Bella playfully slapped Edwards chest. "Hush, you. Stop embarrassing her." Getting up swiftly, Bella embraced her daughter. "Good morning sweetheart. Sleep okay?"

She shrugged. "Yeah, I guess. You have no idea how hard it is to get a good night of sleep when your uncles continue to wrestle outside your door. How many portraits did they break this time? I heard three crashes…"

Her father chuckled. "Three portraits, plus a vase."

"It was Emmetts fault! Again!" Jasper yelled from the kitchen.

"It was totally my fault that you missed tackling me and took out the wall instead! Oh yeah, my bad!" Emmett called back from upstairs.

"Oh, will you boys cut it out! One more argument and I swear to God, my vase wont be the only thing that's broken!" Renesmee heard Esme yell from the kitchen.

Edward chuckled, turning his attention back towards his wife and daughter. "You know, Renesmee, just when I thought you couldn't look more like your mom, you continue to resemble her."

Visibly blushing again, Renesmee mentally compared herself to her mother. Although she will never be as pretty, she was close in comparison. They were about the same height, with the same perfectly proportioned body. Renesmee's hair still retained her fathers bronze color, and fell in perfect loose curls down the small of her back. Because she was still half human, Renesmee still regained her mothers chocolate brown eyes and the slight blush to her cheeks. But her skin will never be as pale, would never twinkle as much in the sun, or be as tough as her mothers vampire one. However, this did allow Renesmee to blend in with humans easier, as they both shared a beating heart.

She quickly changed the subject. Catching a wiff of the warm aroma, she sighed with hunger. "Mmm…I smell Esmes pancakes! Lets dig in, Jake!"

Jacob followed her into the kitchen where they joined the rest of the Cullens. Carlisle was casually reading a newspaper, Alice was rearranging the flower display, Rosalie and Jasper were cleaning up the kitchen, while Esme was preparing a plate for Jacob and Renesmee.

Carlisle looked up. "Ah, good morning Renesmee. And you, Jacob." He greeted warmly.

She gave Carlisle a quick kiss on the cheek. "Morning, grandfather."

"I hope you two are hungry, because theres a lot of pancakes here!" Esme said, placing two plates full of food on the table for them.

Jacob quickly sat down, eying the food with delight. "Oh trust me, you wont need to worry about leftovers." He began to shove forkfuls into his mouth.

Rosalie gave a look of disgust. "Ew, Jacob. Maybe we should switch you back to the doggie bowl."

Renesmee fought back a giggle as she began eating. Although it wasn't as satisfying as blood, Esme's cooking still hit the spot. Her parents only let her go hunting once every two months, just enough to keep her from focusing on her human bloodlust. Even though she was almost as good as her parents with her self-control, the family was still paranoid about possible slip-ups.

By the time her and Jacob were done eating, the rest of the family joined in the large kitchen, enjoying some casual time before the "children" had to go to school. Times like these where the atmosphere was completely relaxed and light-hearted was Renesmee's most favorite time to spend with the family. Whether it was intentional or with the help of her uncle Jasper, she did not care. It gave her the sense of togetherness among her abnormal family.

"So, lovebirds, excited for your big seventy-fifth this summer?" Jasper asked, directing attention to Edward and Bella, who were casually leaning against the doorframe.

Bella shrugged. "Well, we know its coming up…but we haven't put any thought into it…"

"Its no big deal to us. We have no desire to celebrate outside our family. To us, every night is an anniversary. One more day together." Edward continued, looking into Bella's eyes.

Emmett scoffed. "Ugh, gag me now. But really, no celebration? No reception? No second, er, fiftieth honeymoon?

Renesmee interjected. "Yeah…I mean, seventy-five years. That's a big deal."

Alice grabbed the empty plates in front of Jacob and Renesmee, walking to place them in the dishwasher. "Obviously this kind of achievement calls for a-" Alice froze, dropping the two plates with a loud clash.

Jasper was by her side in less than a second. "Alice? Alice! Whats wrong?!"

Alice snapped out of her haze with a huge grin. "Oh my God, that's it!"

"Whats it?" Carlisle asked concerned.

The pixie-like vampire waltzed over to Edward and Bella. "You're going to renew your vows! How perfect!"

Edward looked at her strangely. "No, we aren't. We went over this."

"Yes you are. I saw it! Oh, its going to be so great!"

"And who do you think is going to plan this marriage renewal?" Esme questioned.

Alice jumped up and down, giddy with excitement. "We are. Altogether as a family!"

"Oh, no we aren't! We are not planning another wedding, Alice!" Bella shook her head furiously.

"Don't worry. You guys," Alice gestured back at Bella and Edward, "don't have to plan anything. We're going to be doing all the work. All you have to do is show up!"

Emmett rubbed his hands together. "Hell yeah! I'm so in! This weddings gonna be awesome!"

"I guess I'll help. I've always been good at party planning. But, then again, is there anything I'm not good at?" Rosalie said, leaning against Emmetts chest.

Esme smiled at the possibilities. "This is another perfect opportunity for some unique family bonding! Don't you think, Carlisle?"

Carlisle wrapped his arms around his wife, kissing her sweetly. "Why, of course. I would love to witness another wonderful wedding."

"Yes! Oh my gosh, I get to help plan a wedding! Don't worry, Mom and Dad, its going to be mind-blowing!" Renesmee exclaimed, smiling happily to her aunt. "I swear, Alice, you're ideas are the greatest!"

"Woah, oh no. No, no, no. There will be no wedding!" Edward called, pointing his finger at every family member.

"Aw, dad…" Renesmee got up and placed her angelic face on her father's shoulders, "must you always be such a party pooper? Come on, you have nothing to worry about. The family's got it all taken care of…"

"Yeah, Eddie…" Jacob received a death glare from the vampire, "…just think about how happy it will make all of us…"

Bella looked like she was torn, and the stare she was receiving from Jasper didn't help. "Oh, Jasper, cut it out!"

Jasper laughed aloud. Edward looked down at his daughter, who was giving him her best puppy eyes. With Edwards painful expression, clearly the silent begging was working. "Aw, Renesmee…stop staring like that…you know I cant say no to that…"

Alice jumped with excitement. "Yes! Oh, this is so great! I got to start writing down ideas!" With that, the small vampire flew out of the room and bounded up the stairs in an instant.

"Hey! That wasn't a definite yes!" Bella called after her sister.

"Its no use. Shes already started." Esme said, picking up the shards of what used to be the porcelain plates.

Renesmee hugged her father. "Yay! Oh, thank you daddy! Trust me, this will be the most beautiful wedding you've ever seen!" She grabbed Jacob and ran to follow her aunt up the stairs.

"And probably the most expensive." Carlisle chuckled.

"But don't worry, it will all be done in good taste." Rosalie called over her shoulder while walking out of the room with Emmett.

Jasper smiled at Edward. "You're welcome."

"What, do you think I wanted this?" Edward retorted.

Jasper shrugged and walked out to follow his other siblings, leaving a very annoyed Edward and a defeated Bella.

"What did we just agree to?" She asked, horrified.

"That's the thing, we didn't agree to it." Edward sighed.

They could hear Alice shouting from upstairs, "No Emmett, Victoria's Secret is not a valid theme for this wedding!"

Edward rubbed the bridge of his nose. "We are so screwed."

I know, it started off really slow, but I had to get the ball rolling somehow…I promise, It WILL get better! I already have a few drabbles in the making. Like I said, it's a loose plot with most drabbles revolving around the planning. So please review! Tell me what you think :]

xSweetSimplicityx