"hmpft!" growled penny as she slammed the door behind her. Really, for the smartest man she knew, Sheldon Cooper was an idiot.
After spending the best part of two hours with Sheldon and his 'date,' Penny wanted nothing more than to curl up on the sofa and watch some trashy TV. To say she hadn't enjoyed her time would be an understatement. To say what upset her was that the only proper conversation shared was regarding her being a slut would be a lie.
No, what Penny was very upset about was the fact that Sheldon thought she was a slut. Or at least he made it sound that way.
"you still have time to find number 32!" She mimicked.
'What's the deal with that!' she shrieked into her cushion. Why would he notice every guy she slept with? Every guy she brought home? Penny had always assumed her and Sheldon had quite a solid friendship, more so than ever since she'd broken up with Leonard. So it came as quite a shock to hear him say all those things, things she never even knew he thought about.
That's why she 'digged Shamy' so much. It was exciting news, Sheldon having a girlfriend... This is Sheldon we're talking about Asexual Sheldon! Or so she thought. Before now, never in her wildest dreams had she imagined Sheldon as a potential partner for anyone, let alone herself. Sometimes, in the cheesecake factory, when the work was slow, she would imagine her life if she had stayed with Leonard, gone out with Raj, even Howard (although those what-ifs were suppressed as soon as they formed.) Knowing Sheldon had the capacity for a girlfriend... well, this changed things she thought.
But, before Penny got carried away, she had to remind herself of the exchanges between Sheldon and Amy. They weren't exactly boyfriend and girlfriend. They barely spoke and neither of them had any interest in sex (well, that wasn't true – Amy defiantly seemed interested in sex. Just not with a partner.)
Sheldon on the other hand... well, he'd never even had a girlfriend. Penny safely assumed he was a virgin and this surprised her. Not because she thought he must have had sex before, just because she never considered it.
A virgin who doesn't even want to have sex. Not even to try it.
Suddenly Penny's mind filled with images of Sheldon kissing, Sheldon caressing, Sheldon having sex. The thoughts appealed to her more than she ever thought that they would. Soon, the thoughts turned to Sheldon kissing her. And before she could stop herself, she was stood up and marching across the hall.
"Thirty two... I'll show you thirty two!"
She strode through the living room where Leonard was on the phone. He didn't bat an eyelid at her.
Once she was outside Sheldon's door, she stopped. She raised her hand to knock (...Sheldon...Sheldon...Sheldon) but she stopped herself. She opened the door and Sheldon gaped at her.
"You're in my room. People aren't supposed to be in my room." He was wearing flannel pyjamas and stood in the middle of his room.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. So what's the deal with you and Amy?" Penny had to know.
"Well, if you are inquiring regarding our plans to conceive a child in vitro, they have been suspended indefinably."
"Oh," mouthed Penny silently. This was good. This was very good. She didn't like the thought of Sheldon and girl!Sheldon raising a baby together. What a childhood this poor kid would have! "Well, is she still your girlfriend?"
"I thought I made it quite clear to you that Amy never was my girlfriend," Replied Sheldon.
"But didn't you take her on a date?"
"A date of sorts, but it was merely a preliminary to fertilization. There was no romantic component focused towards her, ergo, I still don't see her as my girlfriend."
"Do you want a girlfriend?"
"While I must express great joy in the fact you are asking me questions, Penny, I fear they are not of the right subject. And it's past my bed time."
"Ok, ok, but answer my question. Do you want a girlfriend? Or does kissing and hugging and sex and all that mean nothing to you what so ever? What's your deal!" All the questions Penny had always wanted to ask Sheldon, but never had the right opportunity to, bubbled to the surface. In all fairness, she didn't think even this was the right opportunity, but it was as good as any.
Sheldon looked at her for a moment, thinking for a suitable reply but none came. If she thought it was possible, Penny could have sword a faint blush appeared on Sheldon's cheeks.
"I- I-I..."he stammered. But before he had time to add a verb, Penny had lunged forward and her lips were on his.
Her hands came to his cheeks, keeping his mouth steady and she tiptoed to reach him. The motion caused her to fall off balance, and before she knew it, she was leaning on him.
Instinctively, his hands grabbed her shoulders. Although, Penny thought, it wasn't a romantic gesture, it was an 'I don't want you to fall in my room and break your neck; that would really interrupt my sleep schedule' gesture.
Nevertheless, Sheldon did nothing to break the kiss so Penny moved on. While before, it had been and awkward pressing of lips, Penny now opened her mouth ever so slightly and waited for Sheldon to copy her. Soon, the uncomfortable kiss became a somewhat clumsy but at least enjoyable kiss. Moving one had to his shoulder, to give her leverage; she stood up more so that she could deepen the kiss. Before long, her tongue passed his lips and she stroked the roof of his mouth, she grazed his teeth. He did nothing to reciprocate the action, but she went ahead until her tongue was moving against Sheldon's.
'Holy Frick!' she thought, 'I'm kissing Sheldon.'
She pulled back as quickly as she started the kiss and his eyes met hers looking somewhat confused.
"Um... well..." Muttered Penny; she was sad to have lost contact with the Physicist.
"It may come as no surprised to you, Penny, but that was my... as pop culture would refer to it... 'first kiss."
No, Penny was not surprised, but she did feel rather proud.
"However," he continued, "What I find truly fascinating, is that all signs would dictate... I enjoyed it."
Penny's face suddenly broke into a huge grin, "Really?"
"Well, yes, I can note a definite increase in heart rate and blood pressure. And the feeling of a euphoria that one can only assume comes from the release of hormones such as-"
"Sheldon, sweetie, I'm going to stop you right there. If you really enjoyed it, surely you know the logical thing to do next."
Sheldon kissed her.
What other penny shippers saw Sheldon, Penny and Amy on the date and wished they could crop the right had third out of the screen?
I just watched the ep an hour of so ago, and I had to write this straight away!
More will be up asap – let me know what you thought though, I'm not sure I got the voices terribly well and any con-crit would be love so I can work on it in the following chapters :D
Thanks for reading ^^