Title: That Time
Author: Stephanie Wheatley, thewheatmeister@hotmail.com
Summary: Harm comforts Mac.
Disclaimer: I don't own 'em, so please don't sue.
****************************************************************************
1900 EST
Mac's Apartment
Harm knocked on the door. "Come in," his partner call wearily.
"Hey, Mac...What's the matter? You look like hell," Harm said, closing the door behind him. Col. Sarah Mackenzie was sprawled out on her couch, still in her uniform and obviously in pain.
Mac looked up at him. "Nothing..."
"It's obviously something, Sarah. What's wrong?"
"Well...we've known each other long enough...I guess I can tell you this..."
"You know you can tell me anything, Mac," Harm said, gently, sitting on the table in front of Mac.
"Okay...If you say so...Harm, my cramps are killing me. I can barely move, it hurts so bad."
Harm's face softened and he placed his hand on his partner's arm. Helping her to her feet, he said, "You go in and put on some sweats or whatever makes you comfortable. I'll take care of the rest."
Mac slowly made her way to her bedroom, wincing in pain. Harm went into the kitchen. Rummaging through her medicine cabinet, he found a hot water bottle. He filled it with tap water, then put it in the microwave to heat. While that was going, he prepared some hot chocolate on the stove. Ten minutes later, he walked into Mac's room. She had changed into sweat pants and a Marine Corps t-shirt. "Here," Harm said with a smile. "Drink this."
Mac took the proffered mug of cocoa and sipped it to find that it was just the right temperature, not too hot, but not too cold. "Thanks, Flyboy," she said gratefully.
"No problem, Marine. I used to do this for Jenny all the time."
"Who's Jenny?"
"My baby sister."
"I didn't know you had a sister."
"I'd rather not get into that story right now, Mac. I'll tell you later, I promise."
"Okay," she replied, polishing off her cocoa. Harm took the mug from her and handed her the hot water bottle.
"Here. Lay on your side and put this on your stomach." Mac did as she was told. "Do you want me to stay for a while?" Harm asked.
"Please."
"Sure," he replied, sitting on the edge of the bed and taking his shoes off. He left the room briefly to turn off the lights in the living room and kitchen, then returned and laid down on the bed, spooned against Mac. She reached up and turned out the light, then settled back in Harm's embrace. He wrapped an arm around her waist and placed a hand over hers on the hot water bottle. "Feeling better?" he asked softly, his breath warm on her ear.
"Yeah. Much better. Thank you, Flyboy...Sweet dreams."
"You're welcome, Jarhead. Good night."
Soon, both were sound asleep, content in each other's arms.
****************************************************************************
One Month Later
1730 EST
JAG Headquarters
Harm poked his head in Mac's door. "I'm goin' home, partner."
"Harm?"
"Yeah?" Harm looked down at his partner and saw that she was pale and in pain.
"It's...that time of the month for me, and my cramps are giving me hell. Could you..."
"Sure thing. I'll be at your place at 1900."
"Thanks, Harm."
"Don't mention it."
****************************************************************************
1858 EST
Mac's Apartment
Harm knocked on the door, then opened it, calling, "Mac! It's me."
"I'm in the bedroom. I'll be out in a second."
"Take your time!" Harm replied. He went into the kitchen and began preparing some hot chocolate and a hot water bottle.
About the time he was ready to take her cocoa to her, Mac emerged from her bedroom. Upon seeing him, she walked up to him and gave him a hug. "Thank you ahead of time."
"You're more than welcome, Mac." Harm guided her to the couch where she drank her cocoa, which was, once again, just right. After it was gone, he led her to the bedroom. Mac laid down in bed and while Harm was taking off his shoes and pants, under which he wore a pair of boxers, Mac said, "Harm, tell me about Jenny."
Harm let out a sigh. He handed Mac the water bottle, which she placed on her abdomen. Once the lights were out and they were spooned together, Harm began. "Well, my dad disappeared when I was six, Mom met Frank when I was seven, and she had Jenny when I was eight. Jenny was always closer to me than she was to Frank, and that irritated him, but I loved it. She was such a sweet kid. She's got huge blue eyes and gorgeous strawberry blonde hair. I was always her protector growing up. After I graduated from the Academy, I was stationed in California for a while, so I got to see her and Mom and Frank quite a bit. That's when I started helping Jenny with her cramps. Mom and Frank were gone one weekend and her cramps were so bad, she couldn't stand up. I called Mom and asked her what I should do for Jenny, and she told me to make a cup of her favorite cold weather drink and get a hot water bottle made up. So I made some mint tea and got a hot water bottle, and it really did help. Sometimes, I'd sing to her, too. Anyways, after that, if I was home and it was her time of the month, I always tried to make her feel better, because she was my kid sister and I couldn't stand seeing her in tears like that."
"What about now? I've never heard you mention her name before now."
"I haven't talked to her in almost five years."
"Why not?" Mac asked, craning her neck to see Harm's face. A look of anguish washed over him.
"She met this guy about seven years ago. At first, he seemed alright, but after a while, I started to see some violent behavior on his part. It wasn't necessarily directed at Jenny, but I knew that could change."
"And it did?" Mac guessed.
"Yeah. They got engaged, and then he started hitting her. I was so mad at that guy. I knew that if I was ever in a room alone with that guy, one of us wouldn't have been breathing when they opened the door. I tried to talk to Jenny about it. I told her I was worried and that I didn't think this was the best thing for her, but she wouldn't listen to me. So, I tried to talk to the guy, but he went and told Jenny that I just wanted her to be unhappy. That was five years ago. She told me in no uncertain terms that she didn't want to have any contact with me at all. We haven't spoken since then."
"Did they get married?"
"I don't know. Mom and Frank haven't talked to her in years, either. I'm not sure they even know where she is now."
"Harm, you need to talk to her."
"She won't want to hear anything I have to say."
"How do you know?" Mac challenged gently, placing a hand on his arm.
"Harm, she's your little sister. Don't let your pride and hers get in the way of your relationship. If she really means that much to you, you should try to salvage some sort of relationship with her."
"Maybe you're right," he conceded.
"You know I am," she said with a grin.
"Maybe."
"Harm?"
"Yeah, Mac?"
"You used to sing to Jenny, right?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"Would you...sing for me?"
"Sure. If you trust me to sing acappella."
"I know you can do it."
'I know you've heard the excuses before
So I won't waste your time and I'll keep this short
I've bound my emotions, 'cause I can't afford to be wrong
I know we've talked about being good friends
So we've been real careful of the signals we've sent
But all of your glances, they came and they went to my head
And I'm not a man to throw words to the wind
When I said, "I love you" that's what I meant
And I plan to show you if it takes me the rest of my life
The rest of my life
The rest of my life
I don't want to rush this 'cause my greatest fear
Is taking for granted what's taken us years
To build from the ground up with all of the tears that we cried
We've taken our time and for this I'm so glad
Now we can be sure that this moment will last
We've traveled a road of mistakes in our past to get here
So I'm not about to throw words to the wind
When I said, "I love you" that's what I meant
And I plan to show you if it takes me the rest of my life
The rest of my life
The rest of my life
And I'm not a man to throw words to the wind
When I said, "I love you" that's what I meant
And I plan to show you if it takes me the rest of my life'
"You have a beautiful voice, Harm."
"Thanks," he responded shyly. "I haven't done that in a while."
"Couldn't tell," Mac said as she suppressed a yawn.
Harm held his Sarah a little closer, wishing he could tell her that song
was for her. "Good night, Ninja Girl."
"'Night, Harm."
Soon both were sound asleep. But if someone had been in the room and awake, they could have heard Harm mumble in his sleep, "I love you, Sarah."
****************************************************************************
One Month Later
He didn't even ask. One look at her face and he knew she needed him. After telling her when he'd be over, Harm went home and packed an overnight bag. It seemed eventidee he went over to Mac's house to help keep the cramps at bay, he ended up staying the night, so this time, he did the smart thing and took an extra uniform, his toiletries, and clean underwear with him. But you wouldn't hear him complaining. Harm loved taking care of Sarah, even if she didn't know it. Hell, he was in love with her. The only thing keeping him from true happiness was the fear of rejection and a spoiled friendship.
****************************************************************************
1930 EST
Mac's Apartment
She opened the door before he had a chance to knock. "Thank you," she whispered as she gave him a hug.
"But I haven't done anything, yet."
"Thank you anyway."
"Well, in that case..."
"Don't get a big head about it, Flyboy."
"Yes, ma'am," he replied, revelling in the smile she gave him. "Go get comfortable," he said, giving her a push toward her bedroom. "I'll be there in a minute."
"Okay."
Harm whistled to himself as he made up his famous remedy for killer cramps. Twenty minutes later, after the cocoa was gone, Harm and Mac were spooned together as usual, the hot water bottle cradled against Mac's stomach.
"Mac, thank you."
"For what?"
"Convincing me that I needed to stay in touch with Jenny."
"You found her?"
"Yeah. We had a nice long talk over the phone the other day."
"And?" Mac prompted.
"Well, she told me I was right about that guy. She broke off the engagement about six months after she told me to take a hike. But she was afraid I'd tell her 'I told you so,' so she didn't try to get in touch with me. Mom and Dad hadn't heard from her either."
"So what's she doing now?"
"She got married last year. His name is Daniel. He's a computer programmer. I invited them out here sometime."
"I'm glad everything worked out."
"Me, too," Harm agreed. "But I never would have gotten in touch with her if you hadn't given me a push in the right direction."
"You're welcome," Mac said.
They were silent for several minutes, before Harm asked, "Mac, have your cramps always been this bad?"
"No. They haven't been this bad since I quit drinking."
"Why did they start flaring up again?"
"I don't know. I have been kind of stressed out lately."
Harm's hands traveled from his partner's waist to her shoulders. "My God, Mac. I couldn't even begin to count the knots in your shoulders. You are stressed out. Sit up and I'll try to work some of those knots out."
Mac allowed Harm to help her into a sitting position. He began to knead the tense muscles in her neck and shoulders. "God, that feels good. Did they teach you how to do that in the Academy?"
"No. I just have good hands," Harm said as his hands worked their way down her back.
"Yeah, you do, but don't let it go to your head."
"Which one?" Harm asked playfully.
"Big, flashing red light!" Mac exclaimed before dissolving in a fit of giggles.
Harm stopped what he was doing and wrapped his arms around his partner from behind. Turning so he could get a better look at her face, Harm said seriously, "You have a beautiful smile, Mac."
"Flattery will get you nowhere, Commander."
"Oh, it won't? Well, tell me, Colonel, how can I make up for my flirtatious remark, then?"
"Would you sing to me again, Harm?" Mac asked, sobering.
"I'd love to," he replied. They laid down again, and once Mac had snuggled close to him, he began to sing.
'Tomorrow morning if you wake up
And the sun does not appear
I will be here
If in the dark, we lose sight of love
Hold my hand and have no fear
I will be here
I will be here
When you feel like being quiet
When you need to speak your mind
I will listen
And I will be here
When the laughter turns to crying
Through the winning, losing, and trying
We'll be together
'Cause I will be here
Tomorrow morning if you wake up
And the future is unclear
I will be here
As sure as seasons are made for change
Our lifetimes are made for years
So I will be here
I will be here
You can cry on my shoulder
When the mirror tells us we're older
I will hold you
I will be here
To watch you grow in beauty
And tell you all the things you are to me
I will be here
I will be true to the promise I have made
To you and to the One who gave you to me
I will be here
And just as sure as seasons are made for change
Our lifetimes are made for years
So I will be here
We'll be together
I will be here'
"I love to hear you sing, Harm."
"I'm glad. I love singing to you."
"Good night, Harm."
"Sweet dreams, Sarah," he replied softly.
****************************************************************************
One Month Later
Harm had it all figured out now. He knew when Mac's cramps were at their worst so he didn't even ask anymore, he just showed up at her house. She didn't complain about the visits. She didn't want him to know that she enjoyed falling asleep in his arms. She knew her feelings for him were strong, but those songs and everything he'd done for her had pushed her over the edge. She wasn't falling anymore; she had fallen in love with her partner, but she was certain he didn't feel the same. But she was content to be his friend and enjoy his company, as long as it meant she could be close to him.
****************************************************************************
2100 EST
Mac's Apartment
Harm opened the door of his partner's apartment. "Hey, Mac?"
She looked up when he walked in. "Harmon Rabb, didn't anyone ever teach you to knock?"
"No. Sorry I'm late. I was on the phone with Jenny."
"That's okay. I'm glad you're here."
"Me, too," Harm replied shyly. "You know the drill. Go get comfy."
"Okay."
Thirty minutes later, after both had changed clothes, they lay comfortably together in Mac's bed.
"Harm?"
"Yeah?"
"Why haven't you ever asked me about my alcoholism and all of that stuff?"
"Because it's not my place to pry. If and when you want to tell me, you can, but that's got to be your decision. Why do you ask?"
"Everyone I've ever told, except you has grilled me about it. Why I did it, how I let it happen, how I got sober, and other questions and I just wondered why you haven't done that."
"Are you upset that I haven't given you the 3rd degree?" Harm asked incredulously.
"No, I'm not," Mac chuckled. "Would you mind if I told you?"
"Not at all. I'd consider it an honor that you trust me enough to tell me."
"Okay." Mac took a deep breath, then began to recall a part of her past she'd tried hard to forget. "The first time I took a drink, I was twelve. Mom had just left, and Dad was drunk more often and hit me more often than usual. One night, after he had passed out, I snuck down to his liquor cabinet and pulled out a bottle of vodka. Mom had always told me that when Dad drank, it was because he was trying to escape the pain. I wanted to escape, too. It worked. The vodka made me forget about the fact that I went to school every day with suspicious bruises and that my teachers all asked me regularly how I got them and threatened to take me away from my father. As much as I hated the man, I didn't want to leave, because it was the only thing I knew. Just after graduation, Eddie had the wreck. That's when Uncle Matt stepped in and took me to Red Rock Mesa to dry out. We were there for a month, Harm. The first two weeks were hell. I was nauseous, I didn't have an appetite, I couldn't sleep, I had chills. I can remember times that I begged, literally begged, Uncle Matt to let me go into town and get some beer. Anything to take the edge off. He wouldn't let me. I wanted to die, Harm. I thought death would be better than what I was going through." Mac turned over and buried her head in Harm's chest.
He wrapped his arms around her tightly and held her silently as she sobbed into his t-shirt. After several minutes, he gently asked, "You okay?"
"Yeah," Mac sniffled.
"You wanna continue this some other time?"
"No. I need to finish this. For my sake."
"Okay," Harm said, gently running his hand up and down Mac's back.
She took a deep breath and continued. "After awhile, it got better. Uncle Matt took me hiking and showed me all the old caves. After that summer, I went to college and got my degree. I was a C and D student in high school, mainly because I was always drunk, but I made it through college in three years and had a 3.5 GPA. At graduation, Uncle Matt gave me a big hug and told me he was proud of me. That was the first time anyone had ever told me that."
"Well, let me echo his sentiments," Harm said. "I also admire you. You're one of the strongest, most determined people I know."
"Thanks," Mac replied shyly.
"Mac, I don't want to be rude or anything, but how many times have you fallen off the wagon?"
"Twice. The first time was after I slept with Farrow. I knew I had just ruined his career and possibly mine as well. I didn't really have any friends in Okinawa, so I went back to the bottle. And you know about the other time."
"God, Mac, I'm so sorry. I said some awful things to you."
"You told the truth. I am a mean drunk. I'm the one who said the awful things. I should be the one apologizing."
"Nah. The best thing about being a friend is never having to say 'I'm sorry.'"
"Yeah."
They lapsed into silence before Harm asked, "Is it hard?"
"What?"
"Staying sober. Is it hard."
"Yeah. Every little thing that goes wrong makes me want to go to the liquor store. There have been days when I've actually driven up in the parking lot of a liquor store somewhere. But I can never make it inside. I think of Eddie, and the wreck, and everything I've done to get my life back on track, and I can't do it. But when I'm with you, I don't think about alcohol."
Harm kissed the top of Sarah's head. "I think that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me," he said, sincerely. "Would you like me to sing to you?"
"Not tonight. Just hold me...please."
"I'd like nothing better," Harm said, holding Mac closer to him. She wrapped an arm around his waist and fell asleep. Harm watched her as she slept for a few minutes. Bathed in moonlight from the window, she looked so innocent, so beautiful. Just before Harm drifted off to sleep, he heard her whisper, "I love you," and his heart lept with joy.
****************************************************************************
One Month Later
2200 EST
Mac's Apartment
Harm and Mac had retired to the bedroom. As they had last month, Harm lay on his back, while Mac snuggled in the crook of his arm, the hot water bottle between them. Both were enjoying the nearness of the other, though neither said anything. They weren't walking on egg shells around each other; it was more like they were totally ignoring their feelings. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of silence, Mac decided she would try to talk her way around the issue of her feelings, hoping either she could summon the courage to say 'I love you' or make Harm say it. "Harm?"
"Yeah?"
"Why are you doing this for me?"
"What?"
"Taking care of me like this. I don't understand."
"Because you deserve to be treated like a queen. You have so much to give, Sarah, and you do. You give so much of yourself to your work and your friends, especially me, and no one ever really does anything for you in return. This is my way of giving back to you."
"You called me Sarah," she said.
"Yeah."
"You did that last month, too."
"Yeah."
"You've never called me Sarah before."
"I've never seen you in quite the same light before."
"And how is that?" she asked, urging Harm closer to those words she wanted him to say.
"Sarah, you're the most beautiful, intelligent, caring woman I have ever known. I am so thankful that you've put up with me for as long as you have and I hope you can put up with me a little longer...Maybe for life?"
Mac's head shot up off Harm's chest. "Are you saying what I hope you're saying?"
"What are you hoping I'm saying?" Harm asked with a smile.
"That you say you love me as much as I love you."
"I do. I love you more than anything in this world, Sarah. And I'm so glad you feel the same way." Harm leaned down and brushed his lips against hers. It was a sweet, gentle kiss, but full of promise.
"You've just made me the happiest woman on earth, Harm."
"And you've just made me the happiest man alive, Mac."
"Sing for me?" she asked, looking at him with her big, brown eyes.
'I say I love you, I say I need you
I try so many ways to say how my heart beats for you
I say I'm always thinking about you
There's no way I'd wanna face this life without you
And even though these words come from deep inside me
There's so much more I don't have the words to say
'Cause what I really wanna say
Is what the sun would say to the sky
For giving it a place to come alive
But my words get in the way
Of what I really wanna say
Oh, what I really wanna say
I know that sometimes my words can be as hard as stone
And sometimes my words have left you feeling so alone
So please forgive me and hear the words I'm saying now
I will spend my whole life looking for a way somehow
To let you know just how precious you are to me
I'll use the best words I know but I still won't say it all
'Cause what I really wanna say
Is what the sun would say to the sky
For giving it a place to come alive
But my words get in the way
Of what I really wanna say
Oh, what I really wanna say
Oh, what I really wanna say
Is what the sun would say to the sky
For giving it a place to come alive
But my words get in the way
Of what I really wanna say
It's like a tale to great to be told
It's something that my heart can only show
I'm gonna take my whole life
Just to let you know
What I really wanna say
Oh, what I really wanna say to you
What I really wanna say'
Mac placed a hand on Harm's face and kissed him gently. "I love you, Harmon Rabb, Jr."
"And I love you, Sarah Mackenzie. More than I can express."
"Ya know, Harm. I think this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship."
"Me, too."
****************************************************************************
Epilogue
1830 EST
Mac's Apartment
Harm paced nervously as he waited for Sarah to put the finishing touches on her makeup. She saw him through the reflection in the mirror and when she was ready, she turned off the light in the bathroom, and wrapped her arms around him in mid-stride. "Calm down, Harm," she said. "We aren't having dinner with the pope, just your sister."
"But I haven't seen her in five years and I have so much time to make up for and what if I don't like her husband either and-" Harm was cut off by Mac's lips on his.
After the earth-shattering kiss, Mac placed her hands on his chest and said, "Relax, Flyboy. Jenny sees you like this, she'll think her brother's been replaced by a blubbering idiot."
"Okay," Harm said, making himself take a deep breath. "By the way, you look wonderful tonight, Sarah."
"Thank you," she replied, blushing. "You don't look so bad yourself. Civilian clothes look nice on you. Not as nice as dress whites, but close." Harm was dressed casually in a pair of khakis and a navy blazer. Mac was also going casual, wearing a straight black skirt that hit her just above the knee and a hunter green sweater that Harm thought made her eyes look a deeper shade of chocolate brown. They were meeting Jenny and her husband, Daniel at a new Italian restaurant just outside of D.C.
"Shall we?" Harm asked, linking his arm with Mac's and leading her to the door.
"Let's go."
****************************************************************************
1945 EST
The Italian Restaurant (Sorry, I'm too lazy to think of a cool name...)
Harm fidgeted nervously in his chair. Under the table, Mac laid a comforting hand on his leg and whispered, "Calm down, Harm. It's okay."
Moments later, they were approached by a young lady in her twenties. She was tall and slender and had curly red hair and blue eyes just like Harm's that could see into your soul with just one look. She was accompanied by a man about her age, several inches taller with a gentle smile and sharp, perceptive eyes. "Harm?"
"Jenny?" he said, looking up. When he saw her face, his eyes lit up. Standing, he wrapped his arms around her in a huge bear hug. "I'm sorry, Jenny. I should have let you live your life."
"I'm sorry too, Harm. I should have listened to you. I missed you."
"I missed you too, Jenn." Releasing his little sister, Harm said, "Mac, this is my sister, Jenny. Jenn, this is my partner, at work and in life, Sarah Mackenzie."
"So someone's finally tamed the savage beast," Jenny said with a mischievous smile.
"Hey!"
"Relax, big brother. I've got five years of teasing to make up for. Harm, Sarah, this is my husband Daniel Stone."
"Nice to meet you, Daniel," Harm said, shaking his hand.
Introductions over, the four of them sat down and looked at the menus. After the food was ordered, they got to know each other better. "So, Daniel, how did you meet my sister?" Harm asked, interested to see what kind of man her husband was.
"Well, we met at church about three years ago. She had just started going, and she was in a Bible Study I was in. We became friends, and eventually fell in love. I proposed two years ago."
"Easy, Harm," Mac said, laying a hand on his arm. "You can put the baseball bat away now. I don't think this guy's a monster."
"Thank you, Sarah," Jenn said. "Harm, once you get to know Danny, you'll find out how much like you he is."
"Oh, well, then I take back that comment," Mac said. "That means he's arrogant, stubborn, sometimes chauvinistic, prone to jealousy, and childish at times."
"Hey!" Harm said indignantly.
"Of course," Mac said quickly, "it also means he's incredibly loyal to the people he cares about, very caring, a great listener, non-judgmental, and will go to the ends of the earth to ensure that justice is served."
"Much better," Harm huffed.
"I like to think I exhibit more of that second group of characteristics," Daniel said.
"I'm sure you do, Daniel," Mac said. "I just couldn't resist taking a crack at Harm."
"Speaking of you and my brother, exactly how did you get together?" Jenny asked.
"Well, it was actually because of you, Jenny," Mac said.
"Me?"
"Yeah," Harm said, casting a loving look at Mac. "You and Harm's World Famous Cure for the Cramps."
"Ah...So I see I'm not alone."
"God no," Mac told Jenny. "But Harm was so amazing. It took five months, but I finally realized why he was doing all that for me."
"Because I love you, Ninja Girl," he said, leaning over and whispering the words in her ear.
"I love you too," she replied, also whispering.
"You two are so sweet," Jenny gushed.
Daniel leaned over and whispered in his wife's ear, "So are you, sweetheart. I love you."
"Me too," she said blushing, still a little uncomfortable to engage in public displays of affection in front of her very protective big brother.
Harm noticed her discomfort and said, "Don't worry, Jenn. He passes inspection. But if you ever do anything to hurt her, Danny, I'll kick your six from here to Timbuktu and back again."
"Yes, sir."
"Oh, for the love of...I'm not your father, Danny. You don't have to call me sir."
"Okay, Harm."
"Much better."
****************************************************************************
Later that night
Mac's apartment
After several hours of conversation, the two couple departed the restaurant. Harm and Mac went back to Mac's place, where Harm was keeping about half of his wardrobe. Once they were both ready for bed, Harm turned out the lights, then wrapped his arms around his beloved Sarah and said, "Thank you, I love you."
"You're welcome and I love you too. Now why are you thanking me?"
"Because you helped me get my head out of my six and go find my sister. I missed her so much, Sarah. If you hadn't pushed me, I don't know if I would have ever gotten in touch with her."
"You're welcome. I'm glad I could help. You're lucky to have family that loves you like that."
"Hey, Mac," Harm said, sensing the cynicism in her voice. "My family is your family. I know we aren't to that point yet, but I intend to propose to you one day. I know you never really had any real family to speak of, except your Uncle Matt, but you've got me and my parents, and Grandma Sarah, and Jenny. And one of these days, they're going to be your family for real. They all love you, but no one could ever love you like I do. You're the most precious gift I've ever been given. You may not think you're lucky, but I know I'm the luckiest man alive."
Mac looked up at Harm, tears shining in her eyes. "God, I love you. And I am lucky. I'm lucky to have you and your family and our friends and all the love everyone has shown me, especially you. I used to think that I wasn't worth it. That I didn't deserve to be loved or to be happy. But when I met you, that changed. I am worth it, and I know that because you've made me believe it." Mac pulled Harm down to her and they experienced a gentle, loving kiss.
"Sarah, can I ask you a question?"
"Yeah."
"Well, we've been together for awhile, and I know I sleep over here all the time, but why haven't we ever...ya know..."
"Made love?"
"Yeah."
"I'm sorry, Harm. I just...I'm not ready. I know that sounds crazy, but I'm not sure I trust you or me enough to do that yet. Please don't be insulted or anything, but all of my relationships before have been primarily physical and it ruined them. I think, no I know, this is for real and I don't want sex to ruin it. I love you too much. Please understand."
"You don't have to apologize, I'm not insulted, and I do understand. I understand where you're coming from and I'll wait, Sarah. I'll wait as long as I have to if it means that we both enjoy it as much as we can."
"Thank you, Harm."
"You're welcome, Sarah. Sweet dreams."
"'Night."
Author: Stephanie Wheatley, thewheatmeister@hotmail.com
Summary: Harm comforts Mac.
Disclaimer: I don't own 'em, so please don't sue.
****************************************************************************
1900 EST
Mac's Apartment
Harm knocked on the door. "Come in," his partner call wearily.
"Hey, Mac...What's the matter? You look like hell," Harm said, closing the door behind him. Col. Sarah Mackenzie was sprawled out on her couch, still in her uniform and obviously in pain.
Mac looked up at him. "Nothing..."
"It's obviously something, Sarah. What's wrong?"
"Well...we've known each other long enough...I guess I can tell you this..."
"You know you can tell me anything, Mac," Harm said, gently, sitting on the table in front of Mac.
"Okay...If you say so...Harm, my cramps are killing me. I can barely move, it hurts so bad."
Harm's face softened and he placed his hand on his partner's arm. Helping her to her feet, he said, "You go in and put on some sweats or whatever makes you comfortable. I'll take care of the rest."
Mac slowly made her way to her bedroom, wincing in pain. Harm went into the kitchen. Rummaging through her medicine cabinet, he found a hot water bottle. He filled it with tap water, then put it in the microwave to heat. While that was going, he prepared some hot chocolate on the stove. Ten minutes later, he walked into Mac's room. She had changed into sweat pants and a Marine Corps t-shirt. "Here," Harm said with a smile. "Drink this."
Mac took the proffered mug of cocoa and sipped it to find that it was just the right temperature, not too hot, but not too cold. "Thanks, Flyboy," she said gratefully.
"No problem, Marine. I used to do this for Jenny all the time."
"Who's Jenny?"
"My baby sister."
"I didn't know you had a sister."
"I'd rather not get into that story right now, Mac. I'll tell you later, I promise."
"Okay," she replied, polishing off her cocoa. Harm took the mug from her and handed her the hot water bottle.
"Here. Lay on your side and put this on your stomach." Mac did as she was told. "Do you want me to stay for a while?" Harm asked.
"Please."
"Sure," he replied, sitting on the edge of the bed and taking his shoes off. He left the room briefly to turn off the lights in the living room and kitchen, then returned and laid down on the bed, spooned against Mac. She reached up and turned out the light, then settled back in Harm's embrace. He wrapped an arm around her waist and placed a hand over hers on the hot water bottle. "Feeling better?" he asked softly, his breath warm on her ear.
"Yeah. Much better. Thank you, Flyboy...Sweet dreams."
"You're welcome, Jarhead. Good night."
Soon, both were sound asleep, content in each other's arms.
****************************************************************************
One Month Later
1730 EST
JAG Headquarters
Harm poked his head in Mac's door. "I'm goin' home, partner."
"Harm?"
"Yeah?" Harm looked down at his partner and saw that she was pale and in pain.
"It's...that time of the month for me, and my cramps are giving me hell. Could you..."
"Sure thing. I'll be at your place at 1900."
"Thanks, Harm."
"Don't mention it."
****************************************************************************
1858 EST
Mac's Apartment
Harm knocked on the door, then opened it, calling, "Mac! It's me."
"I'm in the bedroom. I'll be out in a second."
"Take your time!" Harm replied. He went into the kitchen and began preparing some hot chocolate and a hot water bottle.
About the time he was ready to take her cocoa to her, Mac emerged from her bedroom. Upon seeing him, she walked up to him and gave him a hug. "Thank you ahead of time."
"You're more than welcome, Mac." Harm guided her to the couch where she drank her cocoa, which was, once again, just right. After it was gone, he led her to the bedroom. Mac laid down in bed and while Harm was taking off his shoes and pants, under which he wore a pair of boxers, Mac said, "Harm, tell me about Jenny."
Harm let out a sigh. He handed Mac the water bottle, which she placed on her abdomen. Once the lights were out and they were spooned together, Harm began. "Well, my dad disappeared when I was six, Mom met Frank when I was seven, and she had Jenny when I was eight. Jenny was always closer to me than she was to Frank, and that irritated him, but I loved it. She was such a sweet kid. She's got huge blue eyes and gorgeous strawberry blonde hair. I was always her protector growing up. After I graduated from the Academy, I was stationed in California for a while, so I got to see her and Mom and Frank quite a bit. That's when I started helping Jenny with her cramps. Mom and Frank were gone one weekend and her cramps were so bad, she couldn't stand up. I called Mom and asked her what I should do for Jenny, and she told me to make a cup of her favorite cold weather drink and get a hot water bottle made up. So I made some mint tea and got a hot water bottle, and it really did help. Sometimes, I'd sing to her, too. Anyways, after that, if I was home and it was her time of the month, I always tried to make her feel better, because she was my kid sister and I couldn't stand seeing her in tears like that."
"What about now? I've never heard you mention her name before now."
"I haven't talked to her in almost five years."
"Why not?" Mac asked, craning her neck to see Harm's face. A look of anguish washed over him.
"She met this guy about seven years ago. At first, he seemed alright, but after a while, I started to see some violent behavior on his part. It wasn't necessarily directed at Jenny, but I knew that could change."
"And it did?" Mac guessed.
"Yeah. They got engaged, and then he started hitting her. I was so mad at that guy. I knew that if I was ever in a room alone with that guy, one of us wouldn't have been breathing when they opened the door. I tried to talk to Jenny about it. I told her I was worried and that I didn't think this was the best thing for her, but she wouldn't listen to me. So, I tried to talk to the guy, but he went and told Jenny that I just wanted her to be unhappy. That was five years ago. She told me in no uncertain terms that she didn't want to have any contact with me at all. We haven't spoken since then."
"Did they get married?"
"I don't know. Mom and Frank haven't talked to her in years, either. I'm not sure they even know where she is now."
"Harm, you need to talk to her."
"She won't want to hear anything I have to say."
"How do you know?" Mac challenged gently, placing a hand on his arm.
"Harm, she's your little sister. Don't let your pride and hers get in the way of your relationship. If she really means that much to you, you should try to salvage some sort of relationship with her."
"Maybe you're right," he conceded.
"You know I am," she said with a grin.
"Maybe."
"Harm?"
"Yeah, Mac?"
"You used to sing to Jenny, right?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"Would you...sing for me?"
"Sure. If you trust me to sing acappella."
"I know you can do it."
'I know you've heard the excuses before
So I won't waste your time and I'll keep this short
I've bound my emotions, 'cause I can't afford to be wrong
I know we've talked about being good friends
So we've been real careful of the signals we've sent
But all of your glances, they came and they went to my head
And I'm not a man to throw words to the wind
When I said, "I love you" that's what I meant
And I plan to show you if it takes me the rest of my life
The rest of my life
The rest of my life
I don't want to rush this 'cause my greatest fear
Is taking for granted what's taken us years
To build from the ground up with all of the tears that we cried
We've taken our time and for this I'm so glad
Now we can be sure that this moment will last
We've traveled a road of mistakes in our past to get here
So I'm not about to throw words to the wind
When I said, "I love you" that's what I meant
And I plan to show you if it takes me the rest of my life
The rest of my life
The rest of my life
And I'm not a man to throw words to the wind
When I said, "I love you" that's what I meant
And I plan to show you if it takes me the rest of my life'
"You have a beautiful voice, Harm."
"Thanks," he responded shyly. "I haven't done that in a while."
"Couldn't tell," Mac said as she suppressed a yawn.
Harm held his Sarah a little closer, wishing he could tell her that song
was for her. "Good night, Ninja Girl."
"'Night, Harm."
Soon both were sound asleep. But if someone had been in the room and awake, they could have heard Harm mumble in his sleep, "I love you, Sarah."
****************************************************************************
One Month Later
He didn't even ask. One look at her face and he knew she needed him. After telling her when he'd be over, Harm went home and packed an overnight bag. It seemed eventidee he went over to Mac's house to help keep the cramps at bay, he ended up staying the night, so this time, he did the smart thing and took an extra uniform, his toiletries, and clean underwear with him. But you wouldn't hear him complaining. Harm loved taking care of Sarah, even if she didn't know it. Hell, he was in love with her. The only thing keeping him from true happiness was the fear of rejection and a spoiled friendship.
****************************************************************************
1930 EST
Mac's Apartment
She opened the door before he had a chance to knock. "Thank you," she whispered as she gave him a hug.
"But I haven't done anything, yet."
"Thank you anyway."
"Well, in that case..."
"Don't get a big head about it, Flyboy."
"Yes, ma'am," he replied, revelling in the smile she gave him. "Go get comfortable," he said, giving her a push toward her bedroom. "I'll be there in a minute."
"Okay."
Harm whistled to himself as he made up his famous remedy for killer cramps. Twenty minutes later, after the cocoa was gone, Harm and Mac were spooned together as usual, the hot water bottle cradled against Mac's stomach.
"Mac, thank you."
"For what?"
"Convincing me that I needed to stay in touch with Jenny."
"You found her?"
"Yeah. We had a nice long talk over the phone the other day."
"And?" Mac prompted.
"Well, she told me I was right about that guy. She broke off the engagement about six months after she told me to take a hike. But she was afraid I'd tell her 'I told you so,' so she didn't try to get in touch with me. Mom and Dad hadn't heard from her either."
"So what's she doing now?"
"She got married last year. His name is Daniel. He's a computer programmer. I invited them out here sometime."
"I'm glad everything worked out."
"Me, too," Harm agreed. "But I never would have gotten in touch with her if you hadn't given me a push in the right direction."
"You're welcome," Mac said.
They were silent for several minutes, before Harm asked, "Mac, have your cramps always been this bad?"
"No. They haven't been this bad since I quit drinking."
"Why did they start flaring up again?"
"I don't know. I have been kind of stressed out lately."
Harm's hands traveled from his partner's waist to her shoulders. "My God, Mac. I couldn't even begin to count the knots in your shoulders. You are stressed out. Sit up and I'll try to work some of those knots out."
Mac allowed Harm to help her into a sitting position. He began to knead the tense muscles in her neck and shoulders. "God, that feels good. Did they teach you how to do that in the Academy?"
"No. I just have good hands," Harm said as his hands worked their way down her back.
"Yeah, you do, but don't let it go to your head."
"Which one?" Harm asked playfully.
"Big, flashing red light!" Mac exclaimed before dissolving in a fit of giggles.
Harm stopped what he was doing and wrapped his arms around his partner from behind. Turning so he could get a better look at her face, Harm said seriously, "You have a beautiful smile, Mac."
"Flattery will get you nowhere, Commander."
"Oh, it won't? Well, tell me, Colonel, how can I make up for my flirtatious remark, then?"
"Would you sing to me again, Harm?" Mac asked, sobering.
"I'd love to," he replied. They laid down again, and once Mac had snuggled close to him, he began to sing.
'Tomorrow morning if you wake up
And the sun does not appear
I will be here
If in the dark, we lose sight of love
Hold my hand and have no fear
I will be here
I will be here
When you feel like being quiet
When you need to speak your mind
I will listen
And I will be here
When the laughter turns to crying
Through the winning, losing, and trying
We'll be together
'Cause I will be here
Tomorrow morning if you wake up
And the future is unclear
I will be here
As sure as seasons are made for change
Our lifetimes are made for years
So I will be here
I will be here
You can cry on my shoulder
When the mirror tells us we're older
I will hold you
I will be here
To watch you grow in beauty
And tell you all the things you are to me
I will be here
I will be true to the promise I have made
To you and to the One who gave you to me
I will be here
And just as sure as seasons are made for change
Our lifetimes are made for years
So I will be here
We'll be together
I will be here'
"I love to hear you sing, Harm."
"I'm glad. I love singing to you."
"Good night, Harm."
"Sweet dreams, Sarah," he replied softly.
****************************************************************************
One Month Later
Harm had it all figured out now. He knew when Mac's cramps were at their worst so he didn't even ask anymore, he just showed up at her house. She didn't complain about the visits. She didn't want him to know that she enjoyed falling asleep in his arms. She knew her feelings for him were strong, but those songs and everything he'd done for her had pushed her over the edge. She wasn't falling anymore; she had fallen in love with her partner, but she was certain he didn't feel the same. But she was content to be his friend and enjoy his company, as long as it meant she could be close to him.
****************************************************************************
2100 EST
Mac's Apartment
Harm opened the door of his partner's apartment. "Hey, Mac?"
She looked up when he walked in. "Harmon Rabb, didn't anyone ever teach you to knock?"
"No. Sorry I'm late. I was on the phone with Jenny."
"That's okay. I'm glad you're here."
"Me, too," Harm replied shyly. "You know the drill. Go get comfy."
"Okay."
Thirty minutes later, after both had changed clothes, they lay comfortably together in Mac's bed.
"Harm?"
"Yeah?"
"Why haven't you ever asked me about my alcoholism and all of that stuff?"
"Because it's not my place to pry. If and when you want to tell me, you can, but that's got to be your decision. Why do you ask?"
"Everyone I've ever told, except you has grilled me about it. Why I did it, how I let it happen, how I got sober, and other questions and I just wondered why you haven't done that."
"Are you upset that I haven't given you the 3rd degree?" Harm asked incredulously.
"No, I'm not," Mac chuckled. "Would you mind if I told you?"
"Not at all. I'd consider it an honor that you trust me enough to tell me."
"Okay." Mac took a deep breath, then began to recall a part of her past she'd tried hard to forget. "The first time I took a drink, I was twelve. Mom had just left, and Dad was drunk more often and hit me more often than usual. One night, after he had passed out, I snuck down to his liquor cabinet and pulled out a bottle of vodka. Mom had always told me that when Dad drank, it was because he was trying to escape the pain. I wanted to escape, too. It worked. The vodka made me forget about the fact that I went to school every day with suspicious bruises and that my teachers all asked me regularly how I got them and threatened to take me away from my father. As much as I hated the man, I didn't want to leave, because it was the only thing I knew. Just after graduation, Eddie had the wreck. That's when Uncle Matt stepped in and took me to Red Rock Mesa to dry out. We were there for a month, Harm. The first two weeks were hell. I was nauseous, I didn't have an appetite, I couldn't sleep, I had chills. I can remember times that I begged, literally begged, Uncle Matt to let me go into town and get some beer. Anything to take the edge off. He wouldn't let me. I wanted to die, Harm. I thought death would be better than what I was going through." Mac turned over and buried her head in Harm's chest.
He wrapped his arms around her tightly and held her silently as she sobbed into his t-shirt. After several minutes, he gently asked, "You okay?"
"Yeah," Mac sniffled.
"You wanna continue this some other time?"
"No. I need to finish this. For my sake."
"Okay," Harm said, gently running his hand up and down Mac's back.
She took a deep breath and continued. "After awhile, it got better. Uncle Matt took me hiking and showed me all the old caves. After that summer, I went to college and got my degree. I was a C and D student in high school, mainly because I was always drunk, but I made it through college in three years and had a 3.5 GPA. At graduation, Uncle Matt gave me a big hug and told me he was proud of me. That was the first time anyone had ever told me that."
"Well, let me echo his sentiments," Harm said. "I also admire you. You're one of the strongest, most determined people I know."
"Thanks," Mac replied shyly.
"Mac, I don't want to be rude or anything, but how many times have you fallen off the wagon?"
"Twice. The first time was after I slept with Farrow. I knew I had just ruined his career and possibly mine as well. I didn't really have any friends in Okinawa, so I went back to the bottle. And you know about the other time."
"God, Mac, I'm so sorry. I said some awful things to you."
"You told the truth. I am a mean drunk. I'm the one who said the awful things. I should be the one apologizing."
"Nah. The best thing about being a friend is never having to say 'I'm sorry.'"
"Yeah."
They lapsed into silence before Harm asked, "Is it hard?"
"What?"
"Staying sober. Is it hard."
"Yeah. Every little thing that goes wrong makes me want to go to the liquor store. There have been days when I've actually driven up in the parking lot of a liquor store somewhere. But I can never make it inside. I think of Eddie, and the wreck, and everything I've done to get my life back on track, and I can't do it. But when I'm with you, I don't think about alcohol."
Harm kissed the top of Sarah's head. "I think that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me," he said, sincerely. "Would you like me to sing to you?"
"Not tonight. Just hold me...please."
"I'd like nothing better," Harm said, holding Mac closer to him. She wrapped an arm around his waist and fell asleep. Harm watched her as she slept for a few minutes. Bathed in moonlight from the window, she looked so innocent, so beautiful. Just before Harm drifted off to sleep, he heard her whisper, "I love you," and his heart lept with joy.
****************************************************************************
One Month Later
2200 EST
Mac's Apartment
Harm and Mac had retired to the bedroom. As they had last month, Harm lay on his back, while Mac snuggled in the crook of his arm, the hot water bottle between them. Both were enjoying the nearness of the other, though neither said anything. They weren't walking on egg shells around each other; it was more like they were totally ignoring their feelings. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of silence, Mac decided she would try to talk her way around the issue of her feelings, hoping either she could summon the courage to say 'I love you' or make Harm say it. "Harm?"
"Yeah?"
"Why are you doing this for me?"
"What?"
"Taking care of me like this. I don't understand."
"Because you deserve to be treated like a queen. You have so much to give, Sarah, and you do. You give so much of yourself to your work and your friends, especially me, and no one ever really does anything for you in return. This is my way of giving back to you."
"You called me Sarah," she said.
"Yeah."
"You did that last month, too."
"Yeah."
"You've never called me Sarah before."
"I've never seen you in quite the same light before."
"And how is that?" she asked, urging Harm closer to those words she wanted him to say.
"Sarah, you're the most beautiful, intelligent, caring woman I have ever known. I am so thankful that you've put up with me for as long as you have and I hope you can put up with me a little longer...Maybe for life?"
Mac's head shot up off Harm's chest. "Are you saying what I hope you're saying?"
"What are you hoping I'm saying?" Harm asked with a smile.
"That you say you love me as much as I love you."
"I do. I love you more than anything in this world, Sarah. And I'm so glad you feel the same way." Harm leaned down and brushed his lips against hers. It was a sweet, gentle kiss, but full of promise.
"You've just made me the happiest woman on earth, Harm."
"And you've just made me the happiest man alive, Mac."
"Sing for me?" she asked, looking at him with her big, brown eyes.
'I say I love you, I say I need you
I try so many ways to say how my heart beats for you
I say I'm always thinking about you
There's no way I'd wanna face this life without you
And even though these words come from deep inside me
There's so much more I don't have the words to say
'Cause what I really wanna say
Is what the sun would say to the sky
For giving it a place to come alive
But my words get in the way
Of what I really wanna say
Oh, what I really wanna say
I know that sometimes my words can be as hard as stone
And sometimes my words have left you feeling so alone
So please forgive me and hear the words I'm saying now
I will spend my whole life looking for a way somehow
To let you know just how precious you are to me
I'll use the best words I know but I still won't say it all
'Cause what I really wanna say
Is what the sun would say to the sky
For giving it a place to come alive
But my words get in the way
Of what I really wanna say
Oh, what I really wanna say
Oh, what I really wanna say
Is what the sun would say to the sky
For giving it a place to come alive
But my words get in the way
Of what I really wanna say
It's like a tale to great to be told
It's something that my heart can only show
I'm gonna take my whole life
Just to let you know
What I really wanna say
Oh, what I really wanna say to you
What I really wanna say'
Mac placed a hand on Harm's face and kissed him gently. "I love you, Harmon Rabb, Jr."
"And I love you, Sarah Mackenzie. More than I can express."
"Ya know, Harm. I think this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship."
"Me, too."
****************************************************************************
Epilogue
1830 EST
Mac's Apartment
Harm paced nervously as he waited for Sarah to put the finishing touches on her makeup. She saw him through the reflection in the mirror and when she was ready, she turned off the light in the bathroom, and wrapped her arms around him in mid-stride. "Calm down, Harm," she said. "We aren't having dinner with the pope, just your sister."
"But I haven't seen her in five years and I have so much time to make up for and what if I don't like her husband either and-" Harm was cut off by Mac's lips on his.
After the earth-shattering kiss, Mac placed her hands on his chest and said, "Relax, Flyboy. Jenny sees you like this, she'll think her brother's been replaced by a blubbering idiot."
"Okay," Harm said, making himself take a deep breath. "By the way, you look wonderful tonight, Sarah."
"Thank you," she replied, blushing. "You don't look so bad yourself. Civilian clothes look nice on you. Not as nice as dress whites, but close." Harm was dressed casually in a pair of khakis and a navy blazer. Mac was also going casual, wearing a straight black skirt that hit her just above the knee and a hunter green sweater that Harm thought made her eyes look a deeper shade of chocolate brown. They were meeting Jenny and her husband, Daniel at a new Italian restaurant just outside of D.C.
"Shall we?" Harm asked, linking his arm with Mac's and leading her to the door.
"Let's go."
****************************************************************************
1945 EST
The Italian Restaurant (Sorry, I'm too lazy to think of a cool name...)
Harm fidgeted nervously in his chair. Under the table, Mac laid a comforting hand on his leg and whispered, "Calm down, Harm. It's okay."
Moments later, they were approached by a young lady in her twenties. She was tall and slender and had curly red hair and blue eyes just like Harm's that could see into your soul with just one look. She was accompanied by a man about her age, several inches taller with a gentle smile and sharp, perceptive eyes. "Harm?"
"Jenny?" he said, looking up. When he saw her face, his eyes lit up. Standing, he wrapped his arms around her in a huge bear hug. "I'm sorry, Jenny. I should have let you live your life."
"I'm sorry too, Harm. I should have listened to you. I missed you."
"I missed you too, Jenn." Releasing his little sister, Harm said, "Mac, this is my sister, Jenny. Jenn, this is my partner, at work and in life, Sarah Mackenzie."
"So someone's finally tamed the savage beast," Jenny said with a mischievous smile.
"Hey!"
"Relax, big brother. I've got five years of teasing to make up for. Harm, Sarah, this is my husband Daniel Stone."
"Nice to meet you, Daniel," Harm said, shaking his hand.
Introductions over, the four of them sat down and looked at the menus. After the food was ordered, they got to know each other better. "So, Daniel, how did you meet my sister?" Harm asked, interested to see what kind of man her husband was.
"Well, we met at church about three years ago. She had just started going, and she was in a Bible Study I was in. We became friends, and eventually fell in love. I proposed two years ago."
"Easy, Harm," Mac said, laying a hand on his arm. "You can put the baseball bat away now. I don't think this guy's a monster."
"Thank you, Sarah," Jenn said. "Harm, once you get to know Danny, you'll find out how much like you he is."
"Oh, well, then I take back that comment," Mac said. "That means he's arrogant, stubborn, sometimes chauvinistic, prone to jealousy, and childish at times."
"Hey!" Harm said indignantly.
"Of course," Mac said quickly, "it also means he's incredibly loyal to the people he cares about, very caring, a great listener, non-judgmental, and will go to the ends of the earth to ensure that justice is served."
"Much better," Harm huffed.
"I like to think I exhibit more of that second group of characteristics," Daniel said.
"I'm sure you do, Daniel," Mac said. "I just couldn't resist taking a crack at Harm."
"Speaking of you and my brother, exactly how did you get together?" Jenny asked.
"Well, it was actually because of you, Jenny," Mac said.
"Me?"
"Yeah," Harm said, casting a loving look at Mac. "You and Harm's World Famous Cure for the Cramps."
"Ah...So I see I'm not alone."
"God no," Mac told Jenny. "But Harm was so amazing. It took five months, but I finally realized why he was doing all that for me."
"Because I love you, Ninja Girl," he said, leaning over and whispering the words in her ear.
"I love you too," she replied, also whispering.
"You two are so sweet," Jenny gushed.
Daniel leaned over and whispered in his wife's ear, "So are you, sweetheart. I love you."
"Me too," she said blushing, still a little uncomfortable to engage in public displays of affection in front of her very protective big brother.
Harm noticed her discomfort and said, "Don't worry, Jenn. He passes inspection. But if you ever do anything to hurt her, Danny, I'll kick your six from here to Timbuktu and back again."
"Yes, sir."
"Oh, for the love of...I'm not your father, Danny. You don't have to call me sir."
"Okay, Harm."
"Much better."
****************************************************************************
Later that night
Mac's apartment
After several hours of conversation, the two couple departed the restaurant. Harm and Mac went back to Mac's place, where Harm was keeping about half of his wardrobe. Once they were both ready for bed, Harm turned out the lights, then wrapped his arms around his beloved Sarah and said, "Thank you, I love you."
"You're welcome and I love you too. Now why are you thanking me?"
"Because you helped me get my head out of my six and go find my sister. I missed her so much, Sarah. If you hadn't pushed me, I don't know if I would have ever gotten in touch with her."
"You're welcome. I'm glad I could help. You're lucky to have family that loves you like that."
"Hey, Mac," Harm said, sensing the cynicism in her voice. "My family is your family. I know we aren't to that point yet, but I intend to propose to you one day. I know you never really had any real family to speak of, except your Uncle Matt, but you've got me and my parents, and Grandma Sarah, and Jenny. And one of these days, they're going to be your family for real. They all love you, but no one could ever love you like I do. You're the most precious gift I've ever been given. You may not think you're lucky, but I know I'm the luckiest man alive."
Mac looked up at Harm, tears shining in her eyes. "God, I love you. And I am lucky. I'm lucky to have you and your family and our friends and all the love everyone has shown me, especially you. I used to think that I wasn't worth it. That I didn't deserve to be loved or to be happy. But when I met you, that changed. I am worth it, and I know that because you've made me believe it." Mac pulled Harm down to her and they experienced a gentle, loving kiss.
"Sarah, can I ask you a question?"
"Yeah."
"Well, we've been together for awhile, and I know I sleep over here all the time, but why haven't we ever...ya know..."
"Made love?"
"Yeah."
"I'm sorry, Harm. I just...I'm not ready. I know that sounds crazy, but I'm not sure I trust you or me enough to do that yet. Please don't be insulted or anything, but all of my relationships before have been primarily physical and it ruined them. I think, no I know, this is for real and I don't want sex to ruin it. I love you too much. Please understand."
"You don't have to apologize, I'm not insulted, and I do understand. I understand where you're coming from and I'll wait, Sarah. I'll wait as long as I have to if it means that we both enjoy it as much as we can."
"Thank you, Harm."
"You're welcome, Sarah. Sweet dreams."
"'Night."