A/N- Okay……….. So this is a crappie story I wrote at work, because basically I was bored out of my mind. Actually, it's not that bad, but I am just being hard upon myself. My beta reader..aka…..my sister (her fanfiction.net handle is Snuffles, go read her work, it's good) thought that I was being too hard on Harry, but you are going to have to make that decision for yourselves. This is my first fanfiction since the new GoF came out, I think I basically got discouraged, plus the fact that no one reviewed my last story..and it made me sad. Anyway, before I go rambling on longer then the actually story, I' will get on with the show >
Disclaimer – well..the two main characters are owned by, who else, Rowling and company. I own Fiona, who doesn't even really have a part, but I still created here. I will not say if I own the evil fiend or not, for I have no idea if it is Voldemort or not.. So I cannot say>
The four of us were silent in the room, not sure what to expect, of what was to come. We had been captured a couple hours before; I didn't know how long it was exactly. No one knew we were missing, no one knew where we were at all. We were all unarmed, having our wands taken from us when we were captured, and Fiona, the only other girl in our group besides myself was unconscious from the fight. To think…just a week ago, we were sitting in our respectable homes, going about our lives. At least when I died I would do it with my two best friends, and so not have to mourn for their lives, and they for mine. I just prayed it would be over quickly, and he would be humane, because I had seen some of the bodies of the victims. I didn't fear for myself, but for my family, and for my son James, for now he would be an orphan, just like this man had done to his father. The room we were in was small, and pitch black. I figured we were underground somewhere, for there was no natural light coming in anywhere. I had no idea how much time had past, but from the breathing I could tell that only one person in our group was asleep, and it wasn't the man sitting next to me.
"Penny for your thoughts?" I whispered, trying not to wake up the other two people.
"Oh, I don't know. I never imagined this is how it would end. Did you?"
"I never imagined it would end." I felt his hand grasp mine.
"I'm sorry this had to happen to you."
"It's not your fault. That's what happens when you marry an enemy of the dark side. I can take care of myself you know."
"Of course, you won't let me forget that will you." I knew, even though it was dark he was grinning."
"Of course not." I laid my head on his shoulder. "Now go to sleep."
"Yes Ma'am" he replied jokingly, placing his arms around me. Soon I felt this breathing slow, and I knew he was asleep. I drifted off into a world of peace and dreams. I was woken up by a loud noise outside the door. It swung open, artificial light shinning on us, blinding us. When I could see again, I saw there were two men standing in front of us.
"You" the guard pointed at my husband. Two other large burley guards stepped out from behind the door and grabbed him, and dragged him out of the room. He didn't even struggle. We were in darkness again, but I didn't leave my eyes from the place they had disappeared. They say ignorance is bliss, and I couldn't agree more. The worst part was knowing. Knowing that I might never see him again, and if I did, what shape he would be in.
"I'm sure he will be fine." I heard a male voice say from behind me.
"Are you sure" I replied, trying to repress a sob.
"He wont tell them anything."
"That's not what I'm worried about. I know he won't tell them anything," I practically snapped. I pulled me knees up to my chest and hugged myself. Why me? And why right now? Why couldn't I have just married some regular guy, someone whose job isn't so hazardest to his health.
"Are you going to be okay?"
"Yes, I just need to be alone, thanks Ron." I gave him a slight hand squeeze.
"Anytime. You know I worry about him too."
"I know." I heard him get up and make his way over to his sleeping wife. Even thought she was still unconscious I was still jealous because they did have each other. Of course, we did have each other for the last 20 years, but that was just the past, and you couldn't hug and hold a memory. The memories of our graduation, of our wedding, of the birth of our first child. The memories flowed through my mind till it was too much and falling down on his cloak that he had left behind I cried myself to sleep.
I don't know how long I slept for when I woke up the room of course was still dark. I didn't expect it to be anything else. I didn't know how long we had been in here, in this dark hell of a hole. It all started just one evening. The four of us were walking home from eating out, finally getting to spend time as friends. It was the first time in weeks we had gotten to spend time as a foursome. But before we could get home we were captured and brought to this place, wherever this place is. They only wanted my husband, why did they take all three of us. Not that I would dare desire for them to take him. I was suddenly jolted out of my memory by the door being swung open and a light shinning in my face. I was blinded for a second, and then could see two guards standing there with a slumped figure between them. I jumped up immediately, once I saw who it was. They threw him into the room like a rag doll and slammed the door, leaving us in darkness yet again. How I wished I had my wand, just so I could see something, anything at all. I heard a moan and made my way on my hands and knees to the sound. I touched something and felt it jerk back from my touch.
"Harry, it's me."
"Moine' is that you. You're all right?" A strangled voice said.
"Yes"
"Thank god" and then he fainted in my arms. Not wanted to touch him, or move him, in fear that he might be damaged, or hurt in some way, and so I covered him with his cloak and not moving sat and waited. He woke about ten minutes later, or what I thought was ten minutes later. I didn't realize he was awake till I felt something touch my hand. "I love you," he whispered, suddenly taking my hand in his. "You know that don't you? If I never get out of here, you will always remember that, right? "
"Don't say that. We will get out of here, both of us." I whispered, trying to make it sound like I didn't have tears running down my face.
"No, we're not. You probably will, and they will too, but I won't. He wants some information, and I'm not planning on giving it to him."
"But why, is your honor worth that much."
"Hermione" His voice sounded completely serious. "It's not just about the my honor. I know information that could destroy our cause if it fell into the wrong hands. Is one person worth the lives of so many others?"
"To me it is" I murmured under my breath, making sure he didn't hear me.
"Come here" he gave a weak tug on my hand.
"But you're hurt."
"It doesn't matter." I heard him sigh. "I want to know you are really here before they come again." I slid under his cloak and he wrapped his arms around me. We just stayed there, not moving, trying to forget where we were, what was in the future. I wondered how much time we would have before they came back for him, but little did I know, it wasn't him they were coming back for.
We were interrupted again some time later. I had no time conception in this place, so I couldn't guess if it was ten minutes later, or two hours. The door opened suddenly, blinding us with light.
"That one" a man said, pointing at us lying on the floor, speaking as if we were dogs or something. Instead of going to my husband as I expected, they came and lifted me off the floor.
"Hey" I cried, protesting this treatment, struggling to get out of their grasps, to get back in the protection of his cloak. I failed, being too weak, and them being too strong. I caught Harry's eyes, and they told me to stop struggling, and so I did. I stood up as full as I could and held my head up high as I left the room, but I still had never been more scared in my life. I didn't know if I would ever see them again, but this time it was different, for this time I could be the one who would be gone forever. I didn't know what he wanted with me. I didn't know anything. I didn't even work for the ministry. Now knowing that death was so close, I feared it all the more. I was lead into a room, grand in size, but dark enough so that I couldn't see into the corners, and only the shadow of the three men ahead of me. One was in the middle, high between the other two. He stood up.
"So this is the girl I have heard so much about." The shadow said, and the guards threw me on the ground below him. I kept my face to the floor, afraid to look up, afraid of what I might see. "I'm afraid to say you're not what I expected, after all your husband has said about you, but I am disappointed. Although I have heard you have a great mind, we shall see how great it really is." He gave a high evil sounding laugh.
"No" I sobbed. I had no idea what he meant by that threat, but I was pretty sure I wouldn't like it one bit.
"No, did I hear you say no." he cackled. "Oh but yes my dear, yes, for unless he tells us what we want to know, that will be your fate. You shall see if he really cares for you as much as he declares."
"He won't tell you anything" I spat.
"You want to bet. That's it, we will bet. We will bet your life on it. If he does tell me what I want to know, you may keep your mind, but I'm afraid where you would be going you wouldn't need it very much. And if he refuses to tell us what we want to know, you shall go free, although in the condition you will be in, it won't do you much good." So basically it was a lose-lose situation for myself. "Shall we begin then?" He snapped his fingers, and a lantern came up in the corner of the room, lighting up a chair draped in chains. The guards dragged me the chair, and as soon as I sat down, the chains sprang to life, binding me in place. The torch was diminished, and I was left in darkness. I could see the rest of the room, but anyone standing within it could not see me. After each passing moment my fear grew, I tried to remember all the curses you could use to destroy a persons mind, and each one sounded worse and worse. More time past, and some more. Soon though the doors opened, and the guards threw a body on the ground. Instead of staying on the ground like I did, he stood up and faced the shadow of a man.
"I told you I'm not telling you anything."
"Yes, I know, Honor, you gave your word, all that jazz, spare me please. But you see, I now have an offer you might think twice about refusing."
"Try me" At the snap of his fingers the lantern behind me sprung to life, illumining me for the room to see and I heard my husband gasp. " All right, what is your offer?"
"My offer is this. You tell me the information I want, and I won't hurt your wife here. I am not saying that I will let her go, but you have my word she will not be physically harmed in any way.
"Why won't you let her go, she's not worth anything to you? She doesn't know any more then you do."
"Oh, but it isn't what she knows I want. You say she isn't worth anything to me, then what is stopping me from doing this." Taking his wand out from under his cloak, he turned towards me and whispered, "Crucio" and then the pain of the curse hit. It wasn't like a scraped arm, or a broken foot. It was outside and inside. It was inside my bone, and inside my mind. You couldn't escape the pain, for you were the pain. He stopped suddenly, making me slump in the chains. "Will you agree?" I looked up at him, seeing his face staring at me in horror. Don't do it I tried to tell him with my eyes. Don't give in so fast, please, no, I'm not worth that much.
"Yes, I agree. I will tell you what you want to know." He mumbled, eyes now at the floor. "You have my word. Just please don't hurt he again."
" I knew it." He paused, turning to one of the figures sitting beside him. "I told you that a man can take infinite pain himself, but it is much quicker to break him using the pain of a loved one."
"Yes, you did my lord." A soft voice replied. He turned back to me.
"My dear, you seem to have lost the bet. But then again, you should be grateful. A mind is a terrible thing to waste, and you get to live as well." No, I wanted to cry out. I don't want to live, I want to die, I want to die, but my mouth wouldn't cooperate with my mind. He snapped his fingers and the bonds that we holding me were broken and I slid to the floor. "Guards, take her to the" he paused, " the hole. It hasn't been used in some time." I was pulled to my feet, but held up by the two guards, for I couldn't support my own weight. I was pulled away, too weak to fight back, but knew it would be pointless to do anyway. I tried to make eye contact with my husband as I passed him, but he looked away.
I was taken to a small room that looked empty at first glance. So this was the hole. Then I saw the small grate on the floor right behind me. The guards placed me upon it. "Don't move" The guard barked, and I didn't, more out of fear then anything else. Suddenly the gate was gone, and I found myself floating down into the darkness below me. Looking up I saw the light of the room above me getting dimmer and dimmer till in was a small dot above me, and then I hit the bottom. I must have traveled at least half a kilometer. So this was the hole. It was a large circle, large enough for me to lie down in. There was no bed or blankets of any sort, but then again it wasn't cold, being that no air traveled through here. The air was still, still as death. I heard the dim sounds of footsteps retreating, and then the small pinprick of light I had above me disappear. It was now dead silent, and completely dark. I don't know how long I spent in there alone. The only way I kept track was counting the times food appeared in my cell. After a thousand I lost count. I don't know how I kept my sanity. I had read a story once of a woman who spent ten years in solitary confinement, and the only reason she kept her sanity was that she kept remembering her lessons she learned in school, and so, that's what I did. I started at first year and started remembering my lessons. It was hard to do at first, being so long since I had been at school, but after a while, with nothing else to do it got easier and easier. The years past, years and years and years. Wars waged around me, but I didn't notice, for it didn't effect me.
Then one day my savior came, and it came in the form I never thought I would see again. I was sitting against the wall, trying to remember lessons from my Latin class at the university when I heard a sound, and this within itself was a shock, not hearing any sound that wasn't made by myself in years, but it was the sound of footsteps and then the soft tones of voices. I didn't say anything, not sure if they were friend or foe, probably foe, unless he had been defeated. Oh, how I prayed for that day to come. Finally one of them stepped on top of the grate and I could hear them perfectly.
"Okay, it says here that this room held prisoner number 5656561, but I don't see anyone here."
"You think he died maybe?"
"No, because if he did, it would have said so. I can one thing about that madman; he was very organized. Plus it says there are three life-forms in this room."
"HELP!!" I cried as loud as I could, my voice cracking from lack of use for so long. "HELP!!"
"Did you hear something?" One of them said suddenly.
"Yeah, it came from below you." I heard what sounded like a gasp. "Look, it's a grate."
"Down here" I yelled again. "Down here"
"I think there is a person down there." Ya think, I thought to myself. "Quick, go get James." Footsteps retreating and then silence, all I could see was the small bit of light to know that someone was there. Soon the footsteps returned and I heard another voice, one that sounded so familiar, but yet, I couldn't place it.
"You said you found something Peter?"
"Yes, it's right down there."
"Hello, anyone down there?"
"Yes" I called back.
"Don't worry, we'll get you out of there." Suddenly I felt myself start to move slowly upwards, the light getting bigger and brighter. I closed my eyes, the light above me getting unbearable from being in the dark for so long. Soon I felt myself hit solid ground, and I let out a sigh of relief. Slowly slitting my eyes open, so it didn't hurt as much I looked around at the three men, or should I say boys that were looking at me. They couldn't be more then seventeen or eighteen, just graduated from school.
"Ma'am, are you all right?" one of them asked. Am I all right? I have been stuck in a hole for who knows how long, and you ask am I all right, what do you think?
"What year is it?" was the only thing I could think of to say.
"2025" The one with the voice I recognized said. Ten years, my god, it has been that long. It was year 2015 when I was captured. My son was eight, and now he would be eighteen, the same age as these boys here. Everyone was silent for a moment. It seemed like they were waiting for someone. Suddenly a voice was heard down the hall.
"Randy McNabb, Where are you."
"Right here sir" one of the boys spoke up. A large man stepping through the steel door, he wasn't exactly large, taller really.
"I see you found the prisoner James." The man said looking at the boy whose voice I recognized. I quickly turned my head. This man called him James, his friends called him James. I looked closer, finally regaining the full use of my eyes. I looked at this boy, trying to picture what he would look like at the age of eight, and every time I came up with my memory of my son.
"Jamie" I murmured under my breath. He quickly flipped around, looking right at me with an expression of half anger half confusement
"What did you just call me?"
"James, that's what your name is, isn't it?" I didn't expect that he had heard me.
"No, you called me Jamie." He looked at me for a couple moments. "My mother was the only one who ever called me Jamie. But my mother is dead, father told me so."
"You're father is alive?"
"Yes, why?" He looked over at me again. No, then he couldn't be my son, for Harry couldn't be alive. I must have been mistaken, I am sure there are many people in the world named James as well.
"James, quit bothering the woman. We have found fifty other prisoners that need to be taken care of as well. McNabb, take her to the great hall will you." The tall man said.
"Yes sir," both of the boys said. The boy called McNabb tried to help me to my feet, but I refused to let him touch me. I followed him through the twists and turns of the castle. I still had not gone outside, and that's all I wanted to do more then anything, go outside and see the sunlight, breath the fresh air. Of course I was led to the great hall first, which was filled with other prisoners, most of them who looked a worse sight then I, or so I hoped. There were a few with missing limbs, and some who were wandering around aimlessly.
"Sit here" McNabb said, leading me to a place on the floor. I watched his retreating back. I'm sure he thought I crazy, and that whole bit with his friend sure didn't help much. I wondered why I was still sane, and then again he told me I wouldn't lose my mind. It was too ironic. I was given a blanket and then the lanterns dimmed, but did not go out, so even though there was no natural light, you still could see shadows of the people around you, and that's all I really cared about. If I was in the dark again I would surly lose my mind. I fell asleep, pondering what would happen to me next. Would they think me crazy, and put me in an institute, or would I be able to convince them otherwise. Would I be able to find what is left of my friends and family? Of my son? Of my parents? Would they even be still alive? Ten years was along time, you know.
I woke up some time later by a young boy shaking me. "Ma'am, Ma'am, the captain would like to see you now." Not saying anything I followed him to another room off to the left where a flame was burning brightly, lighting up the tall man I had seen before. I sat down in front of him, with the blanket wrapped around me, and tried to look as sane as possible, but I was sure I still looked a sight. My hair was long and greasy, and my skin was thin and pasty, but what can you expect from being in the dark for ten years. "I'd like to ask you a few questions, is that all right?" the man asked when I was situated.
"Yes, of course" I answered softly. He may ask me the questions, but that doesn't mean I will answer them truthfully. I didn't even know who he was.
"Well, let me first introduce myself. My name is Terry Boot, and I have one of the head Aurors for the ministry." Terry Boot, I went to school wit h him, I thought to myself. A/N – He has returned> "I am in charge of this whole operation. First I want to ask you if you know who you are?" I shook my head yes. "Who?" Like I was going to tell him.
"Mary Anderson" I lied.
"Okay Mary" he looked at me like he didn't believe me, but didn't want to argue. Maybe he recognized me from school, maybe he didn't. we were in different houses after all, and that was many years ago. "How long have you been here, do you know?"
"Since 2015"
"Okay, I hate to ask this, but have you ever been associated with him" I glared at him.
"Have I ever been associated with him, is that what you ask? I would never, ever associate myself with him." I practically hissed. "He took me away from my family, killed my husband because he wouldn't tell him information. Information that was so precious to you and your ministry." He scooted back in his chair, away from me. "And you ask if I was ever associated wit h him."
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to insult you." He looked at me like I was about to pull a knife and kill him. "We just have to ask everyone that, for some people were associated with him, and displeased him in some way, and that's why they were imprisoned." He paused. "Now, do you have any friends or family that you would like contacted?"
"No, I don't have anyone anymore." I went back to my soft whisper of a voice.
"All right, I think that will be about all. If you would please go sit back outside, we will try and find a place for you."
"Yeah, a place in the mental institute" I mumbled as I was led out by the same boy who had led me in. He handed me some food and left me alone. I sat down and listening to nit bits of conversations around me. One caught my attention. It was between the boy who looked like my son, and the boy who had led me away.
"Who's that woman over there?" the familiar one said, pointing at me, or in my direction.
"That woman, you mean the one Randy and Peters found, yeah Boot said her name was Mary Anderson, but he says he doesn't believe her."
"Why not?"
"He won't exactly say, but he did say he recognized her from somewhere, and that he was pretty sure her name wasn't Mary Anderson."
"You know who she reminds me of?"
"Who?"
"My mum"
"But I thought you said your mum was dead?"
"Oh she is. Dad said he saw her die, and now he never will talk about it. She was killed when I was eight. There is no way she could be her, but yet, when she called me Jamie back there, I could have swore."
"I'm sure she's crazy, just like the rest of them. I mean, Jamie sounds a lot like James you know. I mean, maybe she did have a son named Jamie, and you reminded her of him."
"I know. Just hopefully thinking I guess." He sighed. " I better be off. Peter said they found ten more prisoners down in the dungeons."
"All right, see ya around." And they split up, James going towards the door and the other boy wandering off in the other direction. This conversation sure got me thinking. So they did think me crazy, well if they believed that, which in all things considered, I would understand why. I pondered these things for some time, having nothing to do, and wishing that they would let me outside. Calm down Hermione, you have waited ten years, you can wait another day or so I kept on telling myself, or another, or another, or another. They kept me there for three days. They fed us food; better food then I had had in years, but that wasn't what I was hungry for. Soon the other people in the great hall depleted till there were only four or five of us left. I didn't talk to anymore who was there, and no one really talked to me. I figured most of them were crazy, which was true. I wondered when they would finally take me away. I was surprised from my half-slumber, because really, what else was there to do but sleep, by a tap on the shoulder. I spun around, startled by the face of James behind me.
"I'm sorry, did I wake you?"
"No, just startled me, that's all." I looked away.
"The captain says he's sorry for the wait, and that he has had a hard time finding somewhere for you. He says that there is no record of a Mary Anderson in all the wizarding records. I asked him that if you wanted, you could come live with my family till he found you somewhere." I looked up at him, brushing my hair out of eyes.
"No room in the local mental institute" I said sarcastically. "You're not afraid I'm going to kill you in your sleep or anything."
"We can discuss that later. Right now I'd like to go home. I've been away for two weeks. Will you come with me?" He held out his hand. I couldn't resist, he just had that look. I took his hand and stood up, still not letting go of the blanket around my shoulders. He gave me a half-smile, the tips of his mouth curling, something exactly like my son used to do when something was going his way, and he didn't want anyone else to know.
I followed him through the twists and turns of the castle, still only lit by torchlight. I could sense we were getting closer to the outer door. Soon we reached a large oak door and I could see light shining under it. I just wanted to grab the door handle and swing it open, but he was standing in front of it. "I think this is where we need to talk," He said, twiddling his thumbs, and not looking at me.
"Okay" Hurry up and talk boy, I want to go outside.
"You see" He looked up at me. " The captain told me who you really are." I stopped looking at the light under the door, and made eye contact with him. He paused for effect. "Hermione Granger" He paused, "Also known as Hermione Potter" He paused again, looking like he was trying to gain courage for what he was about to say next, something I wouldn't have expected. "Also known as my mother."
"Oh my god" I murmured. I watched as the teenage boy in front of me transformed into the seven year old boy who I knew. "Jamie"
"Mum" he whispered. I was afraid to touch him, afraid it would make him go away, and that maybe he was an illusion of my deranged mind. For a moment I thought I might be crazy after all.
"I thought you were dead." We both said at the same time. We both as well, but you could tell they were forced.
"But…but how did you know?" I finally got out.
"I knew as soon as you called me Jamie back there" he said, his voice almost in a whisper. "Of course I wouldn't believe it. Your father tells you your mother is dead, you're bound to believe him, right? You wouldn't doubt his word." He unconsciously wiped his eyes with his sleeve. "But then later the captain said he knew who you were, and I didn't think he'd lie to me, not about this anyway." He started sniffling, and I finally got the courage to pull him close to me, laying his head on my shoulder, and softly stroking his hair. We sunk to the floor, his head in my lap like he was a small child again. It was funny, I was the one who had been in prison, and here I was comforting him. But then again, I had ten years of mothering to catch up on. "It's just that why did he tell me you were dead if you weren't."
"Maybe he thought I was dead." I replied softly. Then suddenly the one piece of wood between the outside and myself swung open and there was a figure of a man standing there. I didn't pay any attention to the man there, because all my attention went to the world outside, the sunlight streamed over my face and body and fresh air filling my lungs. The man stopped in front of us, the sunlight blinding his face from view.
"James?" he said crossly.
"Sir" James said suddenly, jumping up, dusting off his robes, and wiping his face so that it wasn't so obviously he had been crying. "What are you doing here?"
"I got an owl saying that there was some-one here I would want to meet." He paused. "What are you doing on the floor with…" he glanced in my direction, but I couldn't tell his facial expression, if it was angry or confused. " Well, where is Terry?"
"Capt. Boot wasn't the one who sent the owl" James helped me to my feet. "I did"
"You? So you're the one who dragged me all the way out here. Well, this better be good" He said in extreme dislike, talking a step forward. "Whom do you want me to meet?" I had been watching this whole conversation with acute interest. It seemed like this man and James knew each other, but didn't get along. Again I recognized the mans voice, recognized it so much it sent shivers down my spine just listening to it. It sounded just like…just like…"Harry" I murmured.
"What?" the man said startled, turning from James to myself. "Do I know you?" I didn't answer, but just stared at the man. "Well, I asked you a question, do I know you?"
"That's who I wanted to introduce you to. You remember my mother."
"WHAT?" The man gasped, grabbing on to the door frame to keep him steady. "If you're joshing with me James, I'll have your hide, no matter if you are eighteen or not."
"Oh no father, I'm not joshing."
"Oh my god" I heard myself say, falling to the floor in a dead faint. I felt myself coming around, but kept my eyes closed, for fear of what I would see. But I couldn't keep them closed forever, for soon I would have to accept reality, so I slowly opened them. Looking over me were two faces, almost exactly the same except in age. "You're alive," I whispered, touching the older ones face with one of my fingers, scarcely believing my eyes. He looked different, very different, but yet the same. Same coal-black hair, same bright green eyes, but his eyes had lost their sparkle, and the way he spoke to James, it just didn't seem him, or at least not the him I knew ten years ago.
"And so are you" he whispered back, placing his hand on top of mine. Suddenly I got this strange hollow feeling inside of me, like I wasn't sure if he really wanted me to be alive or not, but that feeling went away when I felt a tear drop on my hand. "I've missed you, missed you more then words can explain, even if I started talking now, and never stopped. Every day I went to bed praying that for some reason you were still alive, and that he had lied to me. That one day I'd wake up and find you beside me and realize that it had all been one bad dream, but it wasn't. " His words choked with emotion and he couldn't go on. So instead he pulled me up and wrapped his arms around me. I laid my head on his chest and finally the dam broke lose and I started to cry. I had never cried when I was imprisoned. It seemed like such a pointless thing to do. I had to accept what life had given me, and get on with it. Even in the last three days where I had seemed to be free, no emotions came. There didn't seem any point to them, because even though I was still free of the hole, I wasn't completely free. But now, now I had seen the light, literally, and I had seen the one I loved, and it was now all coming to a close. I finally felt safe. I had finally found the comfort of another human touch, the beat of another heartbeat against my own, the feeling of complete serenity in being with someone else. It was as if the last ten years had never happened.
" I thought you were dead," I sobbed into his robes. "I thought I would never see you again."
"Sometimes I wished I was dead. Then it would have been easier. Every time I looked at something in our house, every time I saw an old school friend, every time I looked at our son I was reminded of what I did, what I caused. He let me go free, knowing full well that I would suffer on the remorse of my sins. I could have stopped what he did. I could have told him what he wanted. I'm the one who caused your suffering."
"No" I replied, finally looking up at him. "It's not your fault. You didn't know. He would have done it anyway, if not to me, to you. I always told you I could take care of myself." I gave him a rare grin.
"That you did. You have to understand now I'm not the same man as I was before." he said softly, stroking my hair, "Will you accept the man I am for the man you used to love."
"Of course, if you accept me, craziness and all."
"You…crazy" he gave a soft laugh, kissing me on the forehead. " This I'd like to see." He slowly stood up, helping me to my feet. He then turned to his son, our son. "James, are you ready? Nothing more you have to finish up?"
"No father" James said, who had been standing off to the side while all this had been happening.
"Then you must come with us," he said in a jovially tune.
"But…but…. you mean" James sputtered, looking surprised.
"Of course, you must come home at once. You have your broom."
"Yes ….yes…of course…" James sputtered again. I wondered how long it had been since James had been home.
"Then lets go." He turned to me, "I hope you don't mind a broom ride, it's the only way in and our of this dreadful place."
"Not at all. It would be lovely." I replied. I had the feeling he had no idea about the suffering of my imprisonment. He turned and I followed him out into the sunlight of the outdoors and into freedom. I realized that the past was behind us, all was left was my future, our future together, forever, and nothing could change that.
ending A/N - I realized why I made Harry so not himself at the end. It was guilt. HE explained it best "He let me go free, knowing full well that I would suffer on the remorse of my sins" Every time he saw his son he was reminded of what he did, what he had caused, or so he thought. It was a traumatic experience, and people change a lot during traumatic experiences>