Summary: "I shouldn't exist."-Edward Cullen, Twilight. AU/AH. The place where she visited him in her dreams couldn't possibly be real. But they had a connection beyond all others. She had to find him outside of the dream because only then could she be with him.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. Very simply put.

Author's Note: Yes, I should be writing and updating For Eternity. But as many writers out there will know, inspiration must be taken when it shows itself. The third chapter is finding itself rather difficult to write and this story was just begging to be put down on paper…or screen, as the case may be. This one won't be too long, five parts at most and I intend to have it done prior to heading back to school. Please remember that reviews are always appreciated!

Something Was Missing

Part I

It was the same dream that I had every night for as long as I could remember. I knew that it was dream only because I had been revisiting it for so long. If it hadn't been for that, I'm certain that I would believe it to be reality. It was too magical to not believe it.

Every time I closed my eyes, I found myself surrounded by a sea of green. Tall wild grass stretched on as far as the eye could see. It rippled like emerald waves in the warm, comforting breeze that was always present. The grass extended in all directions, uninterrupted until it finally met the dark, ink black night sky at the horizon. There was never a moon present but the field was brightened by the stars that shone magnificently from the heavens. They alone provided enough light to see by. I could see the yellow daisies in clumps here and there, the tiny blue forget-me-nots, golden moonbeams, deep red and pink wild roses, and orange lilies. There was something about this place that was vibrant despite the lack of a sun or moon. The colors were like ones that I had never seen before; they were so intense that they stained my eyes even when they were closed. The fantastic colors blended together and shone in a way that nothing else could.

The air that rippled through the field was alive. It was as though I could feel every molecule of it brushing against my skin as it flew past me. It was charged and I knew that I had never felt as alive as when I was in this place. I had long stopped believing in magic but this place brought those long lost years back with potency. Even though I couldn't really see it, I saw it light the air, causing it to sparkle and add more light to the enchanted place. There was music too. Always the same beautiful and haunting melody that sang of a lullaby with such sweetness and love it made my heart want to break into a million pieces. It whispered through the wind, insanely quiet but I could always make it out.

The field was breathtaking. The stars, the grass, the flowers, the magic, the song. It was like a dream land. It was a dream land. But it was nothing compared to the person that I shared it with nightly.

He was captivating. His skin was creamy under the starlight. It was smooth and flawless. I could just imagine the way it would feel under my fingertips. His hair was an odd bronze color that I had never seen before. It was in constant disarray, whipping in the breeze like wildfire. I had a feeling, however, that it was the kind of hair that never stayed in place. It looked too perfect falling casually into his eyes.

His eyes.

Green. Bright green around the black irises. Glowing green against the lightness of his skin. They were more powerful than all the colors of the field.

They were also hypnotic. Every night, every time I visited the magical field, I started out by lying in the grasses as though I had been sleeping. They fanned out around me like a protective blanket that shielded me from the light breeze. I would stare up into the night sky, oddly content even though I was in a place that was different from the one I had fallen asleep in. I knew that no trouble could find me here. I would slowly sit up and take in my surroundings even though I knew them by heart. I would look at myself by instinct and I would always gasp in surprise. I was always wearing a white flowing skirt, a light white tank top of lace, and my feet were bare to the grass. I would cautiously get to my feet and twirl around slowly. I was always amazed that the field could continue endlessly until it met with the sky. When I completed my turn, my eyes would fall on him.

He too was wearing all white: white pants and a white shirt. He was sitting Indian style on the ground, twirling a daisy in his long, able fingers by its stem. His eyes would snap up to meet mine when I finally noticed him. They were intense beyond reason. No one had ever looked at me like that in my life. It held emotion after emotion. They went on forever, swirling in the jade pools that seemed to be fathomless. After what would feel like an eternity but not quite long enough, he would break the intense look that I couldn't stop staring at with a knee-weakening, completely dazzling crooked smile that showed off perfectly white teeth that added to the light of the night. He would hold out a one slender but muscular arm with the daisy clasped gently in his hand.

I would slowly walk forward, reveling in how graceful I felt in this place. I was naturally a klutz that managed to trip over my own two feet. He would continue to watch me patiently with the smile still present and the arm still outstretched. Once I was within a foot of him, I would collapse gently into the same position as him. The grasses here were bent out in a circle, smoothed to the ground where we were sitting but past our heads on the edges of the circle, enclosing us. It was our own little fortress in the endless expanse.

Before I could reach out to take the daisy from his hand, he would lean forward. I always got the same anxious horde of butterflies in my stomach. He was close enough to smell. He smelled sweet and calming, like the smell of laundry in the spring time. I could see flecks of gold in his passionate green eyes which bore into my own brown ones. His one hand would come to cup my cheek with such a delicate touch that my heart sputtered and stopped from the sweetness of it. The other hand, the one with the daisy, would tuck a lock of wavy brown hair behind my right ear then put the flower into place. All the while, he made a conscious effort to touch every part of my skin that he could and he handled me as though I was precious as porcelain. His lightly calloused fingers left burning trails of heat on my cheekbone, the length of my ear, and down my neck before he pulled away slowly. His hands would then fold in his lap as he stared pleasantly at me with emotion so strong, so real that my heart would flutter at an abnormal pace, one that I was sure would kill me.

That was how I found myself where I was now. I was looking over his face, examining the contours of it as though I would never get another chance. He was more boyish looking than he appeared to be from a distance. However, everything about him was so defined and angular that he was clearly a man. He had a handsomely strong and chiseled jaw, a straight nose, high cheekbones, and a smooth forehead. If I could guess, which I always did, I would say that he was about eighteen, nineteen at the most; much too young for me. I was disturbed by how that fact bothered me. It was as though I was angry for being the twenty four year old that I was. I knew that this was a dream, that this couldn't happen, and it wasn't real but I was still angry.

And yet….

I felt younger than I had in a while. The stress of my job made me feel older beyond my years. I was constantly teased for seeming to be middle-aged. Either I lost the stress that engulfed me in the real world or…but no. That wasn't possible, even for a place filled with magic.

Sometimes we would just stare at each other, unaware of the time passing. Sometimes, we would lie on the ground and watch as the stars slowly changed their positions in the sky even though the sun never rose. Sometimes he would hum along with the music that whispered in the wind, perfectly in tune with the notes. It was during times like these that he would smile at me with a secret smile and his eyes would glint with something unknown.

But tonight was different. Tonight, he talked. Despite the number of times that I had sat with him, which was probably for years (and he never changed), I had never heard him speak. The thought never crossed my mind. We were simply too content to bother with words. We felt everything about one another in the silence. Maybe it was magic of the land. Maybe it was the music. Maybe it was something else entirely.

His voice was beyond words. It was the most beautiful sound in the world; the music paled in comparison. It was like velvet and honey at the same time, melting and caressing me into a frenzy. It was music in its own way, as though notes were issuing from his mouth as well. I felt as though it was a sound that my body had been longing to hear without realizing it. I reacted in ways that I could not describe; my heart beat with furious nature, my mind spun, and my hands trembled.

"Bella."

One word, that's all it took. I was a pool of nothingness.

It took me a moment to realize that the music that issued from his mouth was my name. I couldn't imagine how he knew my name. We had never spoken before, not even to introduce ourselves. It was unnecessary in this place. It was as though we knew each other, that we were looking for each other all our lives. Names didn't matter now that we were together.

But I knew his. I was sure of it, just like I was sure of my safety in this place, sure that this was happiest I had ever been. I don't understand or even know how I knew it. It was just there in my mind and on the tip of my tongue. I spoke it without hesitation.

"Edward."

He smiled crookedly at me. I was sure that if I had been standing, I would have gone weak at the knees. He studied me for a minute before his gaze lingered on my left hand. I didn't look down even though I was curious as to what could catch his interest there. I always looked to same here, always wore the same thing. Nothing changed. But his next words rebutted my assumption.

"You are different," he said, his charming voice threaded with emotion. As I searched his face and his eyes, I was shocked to see what I found there. He was always so happy and serene. But now, I could not deny the sadness on his face and in his voice. No, it was worse than sadness. Despair.

"Am I?" I asked in wonder, not sure how to respond to this new emotion. All I knew is that my heart wanted to burst because of him.

He merely nodded and reached over to me slowly. He picked up my left hand in his slightly cold one. His thumb slid down the back of my hand, the heat trail burning pleasantly. It moved to my ring finger and slid down that too, over top of the obstacle that it found there. He looked back up into my eyes, the sadness and knowing smoldering in his green orbs. I held his face for a minute before I looked down in shock at my hand.

A diamond ring.

Suddenly, everything flew back to me. When I was in this place, even though I knew it was a dream, I tended to forget reality. I let it slip away with my stress and worry. I let everything from the real world stay there so that it would only be me and my personal angel of magic. But it did not stay away tonight. I saw the last evening I was awake clearly in my mind's eyes. A tall, handsome, russet skinned man on one knee. He was holding a diamond ring, the same diamond ring. He was sliding it onto my finger. Jacob.

My finger suddenly felt constricted, trapped. I pulled my hand from Edward's exquisite grasp even though I didn't want to. I tugged at the ring fiercely but it wouldn't budge. Had I agreed to this? It seemed so hard to imagine now that I was in this perfect place with this perfect man that I didn't even need to talk to to communicate with. Was it possible that I felt that way about the man from the other world? While I could remember instances and memories from that place, I could not feel the feelings that accompanied them. But I must have wanted it for it to be on my finger now, right? But if I did, why did it feel so wrong for Edward to know? Why did his pain tear at the very seams of my being, causing me to believe that I was in pain myself?

"I won't come off here," he spoke softly as he watched me. His smile was just as gentle as his voice and just as upset.

"Why not?" I asked as I continued to pull at it. My finger was red with the exertion. I could feel a dull, slightly throbbing pain but it was nothing compared to the pain that was stabbing at my chest with the furiousness of an animal. Vaguely, I wondered why I could even feel pain in this dream land.

He looked thoughtful as he peered over the grasses and around our land. When he looked back at me, he shrugged. "I am not certain. I just know that it won't."

"Where are we anyway?" I had never thought to ask until now. It had never mattered. I could have been in the center of Hell and it wouldn't have mattered. But now that things were less than perfect and equally troublesome, it somehow seemed to matter now. It was like knowing where we were would somehow solve why I couldn't make the ring budge.

"I am not positive on that either," he said, the smile returning and a light laugh was present in his voice. That was even more magical than the air. It ran down my spine in cascading waves. I shut my eyes while it rang around us so that all I would know for that moment would be that sound from heaven. "All I know is that it a place of waiting and finding." His look now was significant as though he was trying to convey something very important to me. My hand immediately stopped trying to remove the ring as I focused on him. I tried to understand but his meaning was beyond my grasp.

"So," I said after a minute of staring at him in silence. "Others come here then?"

Edward nodded slowly. "Yes, every second of every sunless day. Some leave almost immediately after their arrival. Others lounge in the grasses, too pleased to move, until it is their time as well. Others roam for days, months, years, waiting for something; they are the minority, though." He gazed into my eyes and I instantly knew which was the case for him.

"How long have you been here?" I asked in a quiet voice. I was stunned to learn that others were here with us. I always suspected at we were alone. For all I knew, there could be someone only a foot away from us for the grasses were too tall and too thick to know for sure. But at the same time, the knowledge did not frighten me. I knew that this was a place of good and no harm would befall me here. The fact that I somehow knew that Edward would protect me willingly if something did come for me stayed in the back of my mind before it could embarrass me.

Edward sighed and leaned his strong chin in his left hand as he looked into the sky behind me. I knew that he was not really seeing the glorious stars that gave us light. He was deep in thought. "I cannot be sure, Bella. I have wandered these grasses aimlessly for some time. Time is not counted here. One minute, one hour slips into the next without recognition. I would believe that time failed to exist completely if not for the passage of the stars. Maybe it is for the best. Surely I would go mad if I knew how long I had been waiting."

His speech was like something I only read about. It was straight from a turn-of-the-century novel. I could guess how long he had been here.

"What are you waiting for?" I asked, staring into the eyes that I longed to fall into. But once the words were out of my mouth, I knew the answer. It hit me like a ton of bricks. He could see the recognition in my eyes, I was sure.

He answered anyway. "I think I've been waiting for you." His voice was sure but hesitant at the same time. He smiled at me. "You've been coming for a while…even before you realized it, I believe. Always the same…physically. But young. You've seen me for a shorter time than you've actually been coming here. You are the only one that I know that leaves and returns again." He sighed, as he looked down at his hands. "There was a long expanse of time that I was here, I believe, before you showed up in this place. Even longer than you have been coming. I wandered around then. I'm not sure if I'm miles away from where I began or if I managed to only get a foot away. But the first day you appeared, I knew that I no longer needed to search. I knew you would return to the same place. I don't know how…instinctual, maybe. But since then, I've waited for you."

I was confused. I knew that my face was reflecting my feelings for I could see them echoing back at me through him. I gazed at him with wonder. This gorgeous person that I sometimes felt that I invented was waiting for me? Could that be possible?

"Well, if I'm what you've been waiting for, why are you still here?"

"Of the people that have waited around here, I have come to notice a kind of pattern." He bit his lip as though trying to think of a way to communicate his suspicions. "If they have been waiting here, they usually wait until someone else shows up. Then, together, they leave like the others. Sometimes it takes a while but I have never seen anyone around for as long as I believe that I have been. Granted, I do not know how long this field stretches on for but I've seen many more than I count." He sighed again, a sound that was music to my ears. "You, however, come and go at almost regular intervals. I have never seen that. But if you are really what I have been waiting for, then I cannot leave until you stay for good."

I digested this information. It made sense and deep down I knew that he was right. But something still plagued at my mind. "But how do I stay here?" I asked. I knew that I wanted to, without a doubt. While I knew that I belonged to another place and the memories from that place flooded my mind, I could not really find a reason to not stay here with Edward. I knew that I was meant to be here, where ever here was. Here, that other place held no feeling. It was just a place that didn't compare to this one. It did not have the colors, the aliveness, the magic. It did not have Edward.

He shook his head in a gesture of hopelessness. "I do not know, Bella, dear. I do not even know how I got here." The look of sadness returned to his eyes.

As I looked at him with a sadness of my own, I felt a distinct pulling sensation from all over my body. I wasn't being pulled off the ground or away but as though I was being pulled from existence. I'm sure that I look frightened but Edward merely looked on with even more sadness in his eyes.

"What's happening?" I asked, fear threaded through my voice.

"You are going back to where ever it is you came from," he answered calmly.

"I don't want to leave!" I yelled into the silence. It sounded foreign in this place of peace and it echoed across the flat landscape. "I want to help you. I want to stay with you!"

"I'm afraid you cannot do that." His voice was downtrodden and it ripped me to shreds. I was afraid to leave him. "I have no hold on you."

"Why?" I shouted as the pulling persisted. I couldn't leave. I was meant to be here. I knew that. Somehow, in my bones, in my heart, in my soul, I was supposed to be with Edward.

"I don't know." He was so helpless that I let out a cry of pain for him. His eyes scrunched up at my voice in pain of his own.

He reached for my hand. I grasped his in my own. "Please." I was begging.

"Look for me!" he said suddenly, a hopeful look in his eyes. "Look for me where you come from, Bella!"

"Where?" I cried. I felt myself disappearing from the field. His grip on my hand was not as strong as it had been a second ago.

He closed his eyes tightly as I drifted farther and farther away. "Um…."

"Edward!" The grip was almost nonexistent now.

"Chicago!" He shouted to me. He lowered his lips to my right hand and brushed his lips to it even though I could not feel it. "Look in Chicago!"

With one last look in his eyes, he disappeared from my sight. Everything was black. It was as though I had been swallowed by the sky. But as quickly as the sensation had started, it stopped.

My eyes popped open. I was lying on my bed in my room at my father's house. I was home.