Author's note – some of you who have read the previous version 'Low Roar' which I had posted would not be surprised with this fic. There are a LOT of changes made to the plot and the narrative. I won't be deleting Low Roar because even though it's terrible and I hate it, I feel like I owe it to the people who were kind enough to support me through it to not disrespect them by removing it. People can read if they wish to. I would recommend otherwise – It's terrible.
The reason for me rewriting this entire fic is that the last one was so clumsy and terrible and it had so many loop holes.
PLEASE NOTE in this Alternate Universe – Young Do's father and Rachel Yoo's mother are married.
Also, happy New Year! I hope you all have a wonderful year to look forward to.
Chapter 1
Kim Su Bin loved Jun Ah since the first day they'd met. She was a pure sweet soul and a fun person to hang out with. But Kim Su Bin hated Rachel Yoo. For reasons, Su Bin couldn't understand, Jun Ah was best friends with Yoo Rachel, even though all of them had met at the same time. Yoo Rachel was mean and she would pass terrible comments at Su Bin making her feel uncomfortable. While Jun Ah would stand up for Su Bin, there seemed to be a sort of endearing quality to the admonishment that she'd subject Rachel to which was quite useless really. Hence, the two of them found themselves meeting each other more often than they'd like because of Jun Ah.
"I don't want to be friends with her," Su Bin says as crossing her arms across her chest. Jun Ah sighs. "She's not that bad, trust me."
Su Bin rolls her eyes. "For some reason she is convinced that I'm out to sabotage her life – well, she's not as interesting as she thinks she is," she glared at Jun Ah daring her to contradict her.
"Okay, I just want to hang out with my best friends tonight, okay?" Jun Ah said making a sad pitiful face. Su Bin pursed her lips.
"I don't know why you need the likes of her. I'm quite a handful for someone – aren't I?" Su Bin asked threateningly. Jun Ah threw a book at Su Bin's face missing her by an inch.
"Park Jun Ah!" Su Bin cried annoyed. "If that had hit me, I would have killed you," Su Bin said throwing the book back at her friend. They both were sitting in class killing time waiting for their teacher to come.
"You're coming and that is FINAL," Jun Ah hissed leaving no room for discussion as the teacher walked in.
Yoo Rachel did not have friends. She had acquaintances who hated her. Jun Ah was perhaps the only person, apart from Young Do, who willingly spent time with her and found her to be so much fun.
Rachel was like the cat Su Bin knew as a kid. The cat had scrutinized Su Bin's every move for forty-eight hours before allowing her to even come close. Rachel was the same way. She needed to be assured that Su Bin did not have an ulterior motive –she wasn't trying to sabotage her in some way. Nobody wanted to be friends with Rachel without a motive and Rachel preferred it that way. She didn't trust how other things worked.
Rachel Yoo did not like Su Bin. She didn't know what was so special about her that made Jun Ah stick to her like glue. It was downright pathetic but Rachel usually refrained from commenting because she knew her friend was really fond of the commoner. The heart wants what the heart wants, C'est la vie, Rachel would tell herself. But what escaped Rachel Yoo was why she was expected to spend time and be seen in public with the commoner. Rachel Yoo felt like she had to sanitize her body for sitting only a few feet from the Commoner. The commoner was glaring at her.
"Oh, it's so nice to be out with you guys!" Jun Ah said extremely cheerfully. Rachel wanted to sneer at her for her pseudo-cheeriness but she bit back her comment. Su Bin, however, rolled her eyes.
"Uh-huh, it's beautiful," she said taking a swig of the beer bottle in her hands.
"Oh, don't be grumpy. I've called someone for you," Jun Ah grins. Su Bin's face twists.
"What do you mean you've 'called someone for me'?" Su Bin asks narrowing her eyes.
"Oh, nothing," Jun Ah giggles. "This boy, I know, I called him. You might like him."
Su Bin groans. "I don't like boys and boys don't like me. I should've been born a lesbian," Su Bin groans hitting her head against the bar table dramatically. Jun Ah laughed while Yoo Rachel snorted. She shot Rachel a glare.
"Oh, yes, I don't envy you heterosexuals," Jun Ah laughed. "Oh, here he comes. Say hello and play nice, okay?"
Su Bin makes a nasty face. "Definitely not that face. Rachel, we'll go dance after I've introduced them, okay?"
Su Bin saw Rachel shrug. When the boy walked in Su Bin knew she wouldn't like him. It was just the way he swaggered in like he owned the place. The way he leaned in too close when Jun Ah introduced them. He was being too intimate. Su Bin shot Jun Ah a glare asking her to not leave him alone with the guy but Jun Ah was way too busy following through with her plan to pay attention to Su Bin's pleading glances. So when she was introduced to the guy, Su Bin was forced to play along. Another old man was insistent on Su Bin dancing with him, despite rejecting him several times. Her...date was nice enough to take care of it but it seemed his actions were not borne out of altruism but egoism.
"You seem to be popular," He winked.
"Only among the creeps," Su Bin said even though half the joke was on her.
"Don't you think you owe me more than a drink for how I helped you out?"
Su Bin raised an eyebrow.
"I wouldn't have needed your help," Su Bin shrugged. "The bouncers are there, and I could've asked them to help me out. I would've been grateful to you if you hadn't said those god awful narcissistic words and tried to exploit me at what you may have thought to be a vulnerable moment," she sucked on her straw and looked at him coolly before saying, "that's kind of a sick thing to do, really."
Su Bin watches as the boy's smirk falters to be replaced with a sneer. "You're a bitch," he said as he left. She only scoffed as she ordered vodka shots for herself. "Come to Amma," she said as she dragged the tray of shots to herself, and downed one shot.
"Ugh, greedy girl, what have you got here?" Jun Ah nudging Su Bin's arm which was shielding the four shots of vodka.
"Rachel, come!"
"What was wrong with In Sung?" Jun Ah asked with a frown on her face. Su Bin groaned.
"Forget it," she said. Rachel rolled her eyes. "You heard the girl, drop it. This is as boring as her."
"Wow, Rachel, nice of you to join us. I thought you were losing your touch when you didn't make a nasty comment for the past one and a half minutes," Su Bin said. Rachel scoffed.
"It was two and a half minutes, actually," Rachel said smirking.
"Oh, I see you time your bitchy comments too. Wow, you're just full of surprises," Su Bin said in a mock-cheer voice.
"Children!" Jun Ah scolded. "We're here to have fun. Not fight."
Both of them glared at Jun Ah. "I think I'm going to go with my other friends to have fun. You should stay here and keep Rachel company. She doesn't have the option of going out with her other friends. I'm not sure if she knows the word friend has a plural form," Su Bin said as she took out her phone. Rachel's eyes widened at the comment and she looked like she was going to explode.
"I wouldn't know the ways of paupers anyway. You should go hang out with people from your stature anyway," Rachel said scathingly.
"CHILDREN!" Jun Ah shrieked really loudly. A few people turned but Jun Ah remained unaffected. "I came out here with two of my good friends to have fun. This night is about ME. So both of you are going to make up right now so that I can have my fun night, okay? OKAY? ME – I'm the important one here."
Rachel and Su Bin scoffed but seeing Jun Ah as angry as she was startled both of them. Su Bin nodded curtly as Rachel rolled her eyes. "Fine," Su Bin bit out. "We'll play nice. For one night."
Jun Ah looked over at Rachel expectantly. "Okay," Rachel conceded with a sneer.
"Good girls," Jun Ah said clapping her hands. "Young Do!" Jun Ah exclaimed happily. "What are you doing here?"
She was looking at the boy sitting in the corner. "Came to see Rachel," he said approaching them.
"See what I have to deal with?" Jun Ah said jokingly. He smirked at her and made a motion of zipping up his mouth.
"When did you get here?" Rachel asked in a flat way but Su Bin could see there was tenderness there. Was this boy her boyfriend? That would explain this creepy comradeship that was coming off of them.
"A half hour ago," he replied handing her something. "Picked up something for you," he said handing her a packet from a pharmacy. Rachel took it and shoved it in her purse. "Thank you," she said cracking a genuine smile.
Su Bin's eyes widened. This was perhaps the only time she had ever seen Rachel Yoo smile genuinely. It was creepy.
"Do you need something or are you done gawking?" Rachel asked sternly as she turned around to glare at Su Bin. Su Bin looked away embarrassed.
"Whatever," she muttered not being able to come with a good enough retort. "What are we drinking?"
"Vodka," Jun Ah answered wiggling her eyebrows. While Rachel and Jun Ah were busy ordering Su Bin decided to satiate her curiosity.
"Are you her boyfriend?"
The boy snorted. "No," he said gazing at her curiously. "Then?"
"I'm her step-brother."
"Ah, I'm Su Bin" she says before she realizes she shouldn't be talking to him. He's of the Devil's Party. What if someone thought she was interested in him? Su Bin wouldn't be able to take the gossip.
"Choi Young Do," he offers and her eyes widen. "I saw what you did to that guy," this Choi Young Do said taking a swig of the beer he had in his hand. Su Bin nodded hesitantly, not knowing how to respond.
Jun Ah and Rachel returned with shots. "Bottoms up," she said as they threw back the alcohol.
"Su Bin, aren't you going to dance?" Jun Ah asked, getting off the stool to head to the dancing area.
"Nah, I think I'm done for the night."
"Is that all you're having Young Do-ya?" Jun Ah turned to Young Do with a frown.
"Yes, I'm on driver duty," he said, smiling. It was so menacing Su Bin couldn't tell if he was being nice or mean.
"Hah, don't believe him. He just tells that to people because his precious masculinity would crumble if people knew he was a lightweight," they heard Rachel say as she poked Young Do on the head lightly.
"I'll have a gin, please," she said to the bartender ignoring a Young Do who was glaring at her through his blush. Su Bin couldn't help the chuckle that escaped from her throat. Her eyes widened as Rachel gave her a disdainful look. "Find something funny?" she asked, cocking her head to the side.
Su Bin rolled her eyes but looked away embarrassedly. She hated Yoo Rachel for having a perfect body, a perfect career, a perfect apartment and now a perfect family. He was her step brother for god's sake! Weren't step-siblings supposed to be terrible to each other?
"How long are you planning to stay?" Rachel asked Young Do.
"Do you have someone to drive you back home?"
"Taxi," she replied perfunctorily. He nodded. "I'll be going then," he said as he made his way to the door.
"Well, now that that's sorted," Jun Ah said swinging her arms over her friends' shoulder, "we should get crazy."
An hour and a half later Jun Ah was drunk like a fish and needed to be sent home. Su Bin called Jun Ah's driver to the front as she and Rachel dragged her to the front door and down the stairs where they waited for Jun Ah's driver to come.
"Aren't you coming home with me?" a drunken Jun Ah asked Su Bin.
"No, I'm going to Hyori's place," Su Bin said. "Remember, I told you this when we arrived her and you asked me?"
Jun Ah nodded absentmindedly. "You guys are the best," she murmured sleepily. "Thank you for escorting me – hiccup – all the way here – hiccup," Jun Ah said as she slid into the car.
"Ah, well, look what we have here," someone said startling Rachel and Su Bin.
"Finally, caught you here, all alone," the man said leering at Su Bin. It was one of the boys trying to hit on her from before. Su Bin ignored him while Rachel scoffed disgustedly.
"Is she my consolation prize?" she guy said as he advanced towards Rachel. Rachel's eyes widened as she glared at the gall of the boy to think she would deign herself by ever engaging in any sort of relationship with him.
The boy caught on to her arm. "Let her go, you jerk," Su Bin threw her one of her high heels at him. It hit him in the face leaving him vulnerable enough for Su Bin to take a go at his crotch. Rachel's eyes remained as wide as saucers at the man groaning on the floor. She ran to get her shoe and dragged a frozen Rachel outside.
"Are you okay? Did he hurt you?" she asked as they stepped out. "I'm fine," Rachel snapped. Su Bin nodded as she frantically tried to look for a cab.
"Hey, you!" They heard someone shriek from behind them. It was the guy. He seemed to have caught up to them. "Oh no," Su Bin whispered as she pulled Rachel farther away from the entrance. "Go get security," she said pushing Rachel towards the stairs. Rachel stumbled a little but she quickly ran up the stairs.
The guy caught Su Bin by the hair and slapped her right across her face. "That's for hitting me," he said as he hit her in the face again. "And that was for acting like a bitch."
Su Bin crumpled to the ground, too much in shock from the hit, to do anything but whimper. She watched as Rachel and some bouncers approached but the guy was making a run for it. Rachel kneeled down next to her and said something which Su Bin couldn't understand. Her ears were still ringing from the blow. Su Bin's eyes focused on Rachel and tried to understand what she was saying.
"Su Bin, let go of your face," Rachel said insistently. She hadn't realized she had been holding her face.
"Miss, are you okay?" one of the guards asked, approaching them hesitantly.
"Does it look like okay?" Rachel snapped. "I want you to go find that guy or I will destroy your club," Rachel hissed scathingly as she helped Su Bin up.
"How is it our faul-"one of the guards began but another shushed him. "Yes, Miss. We'll do everything in our power to find that man."
Rachel nodded curtly. "We've hailed a cab for you. You should take your friend to the hospital."
Su Bin snapped out of her stupor at the mention of the hospital. "No," she said firmly, her hands still holding her face. "It's nothing major. I just want to go –"she stopped because she realized she couldn't go to Hyori's place like this.
"You can come to my house," Rachel murmured softly. The guards were still standing here waiting for them to come to a decision. "Where is the cab?" She asked stiffly looking at the guards. They called out haggardly at the taxi driver making the whole ordeal extremely awkward for Su Bin and annoying for Rachel.
They were quiet throughout the ride and when Rachel led Su Bin upstairs to her apartment in the building. Panic seized hold of Su Bin at the door, "your parents...?" but Rachel waved her off. "They don't live here. It's just Young Do and I."
"Young Do?" Rachel called out as she opened the door and stepped in.
"Yeah? You're home earlier than I thought," Young Do said from the couch. He had been watching television. He could see the girl from earlier in tow. Su Bin. But she seemed to be cowering behind Rachel. He raised an eyebrow at Rachel questioningly. He thought she hated her. it was then he noticed Rachel's ashen face and watery eyes.
He stood up abruptly. "What happened?"
"Need your help," she said. Su Bin had an arm wound around her torso as she made her way to the couch and sat down.
"This happened," she said taking off her hand. Young Do didn't say anything but the shock was apparent on his face.
"I can take care – "
"Shut up," Rachel's brother said cutting her off. His expression was serious as his fingers touched her cheek gently to assess the damage. "It's going to bruise. Get some ice," he told Rachel whose natural instincts to orders repulsed her for a second before she gave in and went to fetch ice.
"Go to bed. I'll take care of things here."
Rachel was going to protest but the look Young Do gave her made her give in. Rachel returned to give Young Do a bag of ice before retiring into her room. He pressed the bag of ice against Su Bin's face but she whimpered and pulled away. She held out her hand for the bag and Young Do acquiesced.
"I'll be back," he said as he went into the other room. Su Bin sat there pressing the bag of ice against her face, refusing to cry.
"It's over now," Su Bin was interrupted by Young Do's calm voice. She looked at him questioningly. She hadn't realized she was clutching the leather of the sofa tightly, her other palm shaking in her lap. Her body felt fragile and her bones felt like they might shatter any second. She closed her eyes and tried to regulate her breathing. It's all okay now, she repeated to herself like a mantra. She wanted to be held really tightly but she swallowed her impulses. Rachel' brother handed her some tablets. "They help with the pain," he explained.
"How are you feeling?" he asked sitting next to her
Like crying, like throwing up. She just nodded. "Thank you," she whispered softly not meeting his eyes.
"Thank you for protecting, Rachel," he replies. "You can sleep in my room."
Su Bin wanted to scream that she didn't want his thanks. Look what her stupidity had gotten into! But she didn't because she couldn't.
"There's no need for that," Rachel suddenly interrupted them. She was in her pyjamas and she looked quite...tired. She wasn't wearing any make up. "She can sleep in my room with me," Rachel said. "Do you mind?" she asked flatly, looking at Su Bin.
Su Bin shook her head. She hated the thought of being left alone right now. "We have an extra mattress somewhere in the store room. Young Do and I will go get it. You can go to my room and pick out something comfortable to wear for the night."
Su Bin nodded as she made her way to Rachel's room. Young Do looked at his sister questioningly.
"I can't imagine being alone. I'm sure she doesn't either," Rachel said as she made her way to the store room. Young Do put an arm on her shoulder and felt like a fool for not realizing the effect the incident had had on Rachel. She was human too. She was always so strong that it was easy to forget that she too could crack if not break completely. Rachel turned questioningly only to be hugged by Young Do really rightly. He patted her head in a very uncharacteristically affectionate manner.
"Are you better now?" he asked a very stiff Rachel who looked away not willing to answer his question.
"Let's just get this day over with," Rachel said as she nodded at the mattress. "Well? It's not going to move itself," Rachel said raising an eyebrow. Young Do snorted.
"As you say Your Majesty," Young Do made his way to pluck the mattress from all the junk they had thrown in the room. It was clean enough. "Place it in my room, will you? I need to drink something."
Young Do nodded as he made his way to Rachel's room. He could hear the girl in the bathroom. He started placing the mattress next to the bed with Rachel helping out with covering it with sheets. When Su Bin steps out, she's holding a towel against her face. She hadn't realized how utterly gross she was looking – like she had been mauled. Rachel looked at Young Do silently asking him to leave.
"I can help you cover it up with makeup," Rachel said softly. Su Bin's eyes snapped to hers. She hated Yoo Rachel for putting Su Bin in this situation in the first place. Su Bin didn't want to be a hero. She just wanted to go out and have a good time.
She wanted to break stuff but she also wanted to cry – she didn't want to be in this shitty position. If stupid Yoo Rachel hadn't incited the guy then Su Bin wouldn't have needed to defend her. Why did she even go dressed like that if she couldn't protect herself? What made Su Bin the angriest was how stupid all of her arguments were. How chauvinistic.
What made her angry was that she couldn't really blame anybody but the guy – against whom she could actually do nothing because he had run. She had nothing and no one to place the blame concretely and she just had to live with the consequences of it. Su Bin was so tired of living with the consequences of someone else's actions. She was so tired of becoming collateral damage.
She slowly went and sat on the mattress and felt it dip next to her when Rachel sat beside her. Rachel gently removed the towel covering the bruised part of Su Bin's face and tilts her face to bring it to hers'.
"Young Do gave you the medicines?" Rachel removed her hands from Su Bin's face.
Su Bin nodded. She had her eyes fixed on her hands in her lap. Rachel remained quiet too. Su Bin looked towards Rachel and was surprised.
It was the first time Su Bin had seen Rachel Yoo cry.
The morning was terribly awkward but not nearly as uncomfortably and taxing as it could've been. Rachel's obsessive diligence had led her to organize a new pair of clothes, underwear included (Su Bin didn't know how on earth Rachel managed that! Being rich had its perks, she had to admit!), with fresh toiletries and clothes.
From that day things between them had been mellowed down to awkward politeness. It baffled the hell out of Jun Ah to see the both of them behave so civilly towards each other. Despite questioning both of them separately and together, they were tight lipped about what had transpired between them.
They weren't best of friends now but Su Bin could often see Rachel being nicer or more considerate towards her and it would freak the hell out of her. She hadn't seen the normal human side of Rachel and she didn't want to. If it took having physically abused for Rachel Yoo to have her want to befriend you then Su Bin was sure as hell didn't want her friendship.
But Rachel Yoo seemed hell bent because she wouldn't let Su Bin think things between them could be anything less than cordial.
"You know, what happened, happened but you don't need to stick around and pretend like you like me," Su Bin bit out frustrated one day. Rachel regarded her with a cool gaze before nodding.
"Okay," Rachel said. And then continued treating her more civilly and cordially.
Once Jun Ah asked, "Okay, seriously, what the hell is going on between the two of you?" Su Bin could only shrug because she couldn't understand it either. "I guess we're friends or something..." Su Bin said hesitantly, "Like you wanted."
"Well, don't forget about me, okay? I'm the most important one here you need to remember to love me," Jun Ah said crossly, but cracked a smile. Su Bin rolled her eyes but obliged Jun Ah by nodding.
"Fancy running into you here," Young Do found someone saying from behind him. He was in the department store trying to find his favourite flavour of the rice cakes when he was interrupted in his search by someone. It was Rachel's friend.
"Hello," she bowed. "How do you do?" She was smiling and her face was completely healed. He had not forgotten about her but neither had he completely remembered her. He would hear Rachel mention her more often than not and he'd remember her broken face but not really her.
He saw her smile waver and her shoulders hunch a little as she got uncomfortable. He realized he hasn't said anything. Well, it was too late to greet her now. It would look weirder. So Young Do went with a nod and examined her shopping basket. It had his favourite flavour of the rice cakes.
"Do you need those?" he said at the same time that she said, "Well, I should get going."
"Um...what?" she asked, puzzled.
He pointed at the bag of rice cakes in her cart. "Do you need those? They're out of that flavour and it's my favourite," Young Do said. Su Bin shifted the basket from her right hip to the left as she waited for him to add the magical word 'please.' But it was in vain for it never made an appearance.
"Is that a request?"
"A question."
"Well, the answer is yes, I do need them."
"Well, can I have some?"
"No."
Young Do glared at her like a wounded animal and she felt a little guilty considering what he had done for her the last time they had...met. She sighed. If it weren't for the last time she wouldn't be feeling like she owed him something. She took out two from the five she had and gave it to him.
"You're welcome," she said loudly when he didn't thank her. He smiled menacingly at her words and gave her a mock-salute as he walked towards the counter to pay.
Yoo Rachel was not used to liking people she had initially decided on discarding. But exceptions could be made, especially if the people in question included someone who would allow themselves to get hurt in order to protect you. Yes, Rachel Yoo realized these exceptions were realities she was currently living. And she found herself, more often than not, being more than polite to Kim Su Bin.
It was hard for her to accept that Su Bin wasn't all that bad. She was crass at times but her crassness was no match to Young Do's and if living with a boy didn't increase someone's tolerance to crassness, then Rachel Yoo wasn't sure what did. She didn't particularly want to find out either.
Su Bin had a good sense of humour – sort of. Rachel found , that with practice, she could almost not flinch at her jokes. She had this undeniable charm, Rachel realized. Something Jun Ah had realized from the moment she had met Su Bin. Su Bin's crassness, her humour, her honesty and fierce sense of the self gave Rachel an inkling that perhaps this girl wasn't so bad after all.
What had annoyed Rachel Yoo beyond belief always was, she realized, Su Bin's confidence. Her self-assuredness. She wasn't rich or exceptionally beautiful, neither was she exceptionally smart or talented. She was just exceptionally confident and comfortable with herself and that had pissed Rachel Yoo to no extent. Nobody, nobody who wasn't exceptional in at least one thing deserved the joy of being so confident and comfortable in life – so happy.
It had been a month since the unfortunate incident and Yoo Rachel found herself finding Su Bin's company more agreeable by the day. Su Bin's agitation over Rachel's friendship was both amusing and slightly offensive to Rachel but she didn't comment.
"What are you thinking about?" Jun Ah asked pulling Rachel from her thoughts. Rachel's eyes focused on Jun Ah. They hadn't told her about the incident. And Rachel wished to keep it that way. She wouldn't know how to say it anyway. Jun Ah had come over for the day to just hang out at home.
"Nothing," Rachel said.
"Can you call Su Bin and tell her to meet me at the cross juncture near our college instead of at the subway?" Jun Ah asked, lowering the volume of the television. "Now that you're friends ," Jun Ah added slyly, "I don't see why the phone call would be weird," she said as if reading Rachel's mind. Rachel rolled her eyes and dialled Su Bin's number.
"Where are you?"
"Rachel?" Su Bin sounded surprised. "Um, I'm at the local department store. I just ran into your brother, actually."
Rachel raised an eyebrow. Young Do was still doing that? "Oh," she said, "well, Jun Ah wants me to tell you to meet her at the cross juncture near our college instead of the subway."
"Oh – okay," she heard the awkwardness in Su Bin's voice.
"That's it," Rachel said and was ready to hang up when a thought struck her and before she could truly process it and ponder upon it she found herself saying, "wait, are you at the department store near the Apgujeong-dong?"
"Uh, yes."
"Well, it's near my house – you can just come over here. Instead of all the running around."
There was a long pause on the other side before an awkward, "uh, okay," came through.
"I'll text you the address." Rachel hung up.
Jun Ah had been watching Rachel carefully the entire time. "So weird," she murmured as she turned to the television. Rachel scoffed but refused to entertain her with anything more.
Fifteen minutes later Young Do came home and greeted Jun Ah before disappearing into his room. A half hour later Su Bin arrived, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape.
"Yoo Rachel," she said, none of the awkwardness apparent on the phone present now, "you are really rich."
Rachel smirked and motioned for her to sit next to Jun Ah. "I know," Rachel said.
And perhaps it was in this unceremonious moment that things between them started progressing and the tension started decreasing.
"So, aren't you going to ask your slew of servants to bring me a tray of food?" Su Bin asked, smirking. Rachel rolled her eyes. "There are no servants here. It's self-service. There's only Young Do and I, here."
"Your parents allow you to live alone?"
"Yeah," Rachel said omitting the part where it was this one condition – their emancipation – which they had bargained for in exchange for playing the perfect children at their wedding and the upcoming events. Of course, Rachel wasn't going to tell Su Bin about this intricate arrangement. Also their parents had shifted base from Seoul to America so it was the only logical thing to do. The newspapers said otherwise but Rachel couldn't give a damn.
"How is it? Living with your brother?"
Rachel made a face. "Disgusting."
Jun Ah laughed. "Oh, come on, Young Do isn't that bad." Rachel shot her a glare which only made Jun Ah laugh more. "He's annoying and loud and so disgusting."
"Well, that's how brothers are."
Rachel's face softened. No matter how mechanized and unfeeling her family situation was, she liked the fact that she had Young Do. She liked the fact that she had a stereotype to be a part of, a cliche to boast of. 'That's how brothers are' Rachel secretly loved how that sounded. The normalcy of it all created an illusion of wholeness, of happiness - of a sane family life. She reveled in it.
"I guess," she relented.
The waiter at the cafe Au Lait helped Rachel get out of her coat and settle in.
"So why did you call me?"
"It's about Young Do."
Rachel looked at her cup. There was a speck of dust on the rim of the cup. She took the napkin and wiped it clean meticulously while she waited for Kim Tan to elaborate. When he didn't, for he was a dimwit, Rachel looked at him and cocked her head. He got the hint. Finally, Rachel sighed internally.
"You're living together?"
Rachel raised an eyebrow. "What is your point?"
"I need to talk to Young Do. It's time we sorted our issues you – we're going to be doing business soon. There's no need to hold on to misunderstandings and grudges."
"What a delightful attempt at adulthood," Rachel said dryly. She realized she hated this cafe with its dirty china and that fake expensive room freshner. My god, Kim Tan's taste had really taken a hit after school. It must be all the time he was spending with Cha Eun Sang.
"And what do you want me to do about it?"
"Talk to him. If we're going to transform Hangul then we need to work together-"
She couldn't decide if the name of the cafe was more stupid than Kim Tan. Definitely Kim Tan. If he believed that she would buy his altruistic outlook as an excuse to resolve things with Young Do then he was stupider than she originally thought.
"What is this really about?" she interrupted his blabber.
Kim Tan sighed. "Eun Sang wants me to make amends. Now that we're back and we're going to be moving in the same circles – she thinks it's best if we try to get along with everyone."
Of course, Cha Eun Sang would be the one to inspire such stupid inane ideas in Kim Tan. Rachel was a little surprised that Kim Tan even went along with it. My, my, the girl wasn't that stupid, after all. She knew just how to bend Kim Tan to her will.
Kim Tan and Cha Eun Sang had just returned from their vacation in America. That girl had got it going good for herself. Playing the victim most of the time, looking helpless, refusing to rescue herself from situations – Rachel couldn't understand what these boys liked about her. Was it her damsel in distress attitude that inflamed their male ego and made them like her? She could never not feel an intense irritation at the mention of the girl.
She smirked. "And you think the best way is to go through me?"
"No, to start making amends with you. About what happened. Everything. I realize how callous I was."
"We were both in a..." Rachel hesitated, reliving the painful memories of her intense desperation and loneliness, "chaotic place. What's done is done."
"You were right. If we had gotten married, I would've spent it regretting my whole life," Rachel said satisfied that her voice did not shook or waver. Kim Tan looked surprised but smiled.
"Yaan, I'm always right," Kim Tan said grinning. Rachel rolled her eyes but allowed a smile to come to her face.
"Well, whatever your deal is with Young Do, you have to deal with it on your own," Rachel said pinning Kim Tan with her cool gaze. He shifted under it uncomfortably.
"Things with Young Do have been damaged beyond repair. When I thought it was one thing that he was mad about, another problem crops up."
Rachel looked out of the window. She realized she felt incredibly bored. Perhaps she should ask Jun Ah and Su Bin to come over some time? She turned to Kim Tan. "I'll talk to Young Do," she said, getting up and helping herself into her coat, even though she knew she'd probably forget it when she returned home. Or she wouldn't. Most probably she'd be uncomfortable approaching the topic of Kim Tan and more importantly, Cha Eun Sang with Young Do. She wasn't sure if he had gotten over her yet. Boys were such drama queens.
Kim Tan nodded, satisfied. "I'll talk to you later, then."
Rachel did not reply.
"Rachel," Young Do called out but no one responded. "Rachel," He called again. He went out in the living room to find Rachel, Su Bin and Jun Ah sitting on the floor, crouching over something – working studiously.
"I've been calling you," he said, annoyed.
Rachel gave him a cool stare. "I know."
"Why didn't you respond?"
"You know why. If you want to talk to me, don't shout like an animal. Walk here and politely converse."
He rolled his eyes. She and her stupid rules. He gave her a mock-bow.
"That's better," she said coolly. He nodded in greeting at Su Bin and Jun Ah.
"So why were you calling out like a wild animal?" Rachel asked.
"I couldn't remember something and I wanted you to help me," he said, sitting down on the sofa and nudging her with his toe. "Yoo Rachel, stop ignoring your brother and comply with his requests or you won't be having dinner tonight."
Rachel shot him an angry irritated glare, her cheeks slowly turning red with anger. "Stop. It," she bit out coldly. Young Do ignored her as he said, "'...and the animals already know by instinct/ we're not comfortably at home/in our translated world...' Where is this from?"
"Oh, that's Rainer Milke's poem, 'from Duino Elegies: First Elegy,'" Su Bin chimed in, unexpectedly. She was unembarrassed and unapologetic about the intrusion. Everybody's eyes turned to her.
"Are you sure?" he asked.
"Of course."
It was the first time Su Bin had seen a genuine pleasant smile on Rachel's brother's face. "Do you like poetry?" she asked him.
He nodded as he sat down next to her. "But I'm terrible at English so I can't really understand it well."
"And if I cried, who'd listen to me in those angelic/ orders? Even if one of them suddenly held me/ to his heart, I'd vanish/in his overwhelming/ presence. Because beauty's nothing/ but the start of terror we can hardly bear,/and/ we adore it because of the serene scorn / it could kill us with," she recited smiling.
"Su Bin's an English Major," Jun Ah said, grinning.
"Not yet, I still have a year and a half left," Su Bin reminded.
"But you're good."
"I am."
"Read this to me," Young Do said handing her a piece of poetry – The Wasteland by T.S. Eliot. Su Bin wrinkled her nose.
"I won't get it so easily. You can just read the Korean translations," she said.
"They're not good enough. I feel like I'm missing out on something."
"Well, okay, let me see," She said taking the book from Young Do, "Okay, see, April is the cruellest month, breeding/ Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing/ Memory and desire, stirring/Dull roots with spring rain," she read quickly in English but Young Do stopped her.
"No, read it slowly," he said.
"Are you asking me or requesting?" she asked, with a smirk. Young Do raised an eyebrow but returned the smirk.
"Please," he challenged, his eyes shining with mirth.
"Please, what?" she asked, raising her chin. Young Do rolled his eyes but conceded.
"Kim Su Bin, will you please read out this poem?"
"Well, if you insist," she sighed dramatically at which Young Do let out a light scoff. Rachel and Jun Ah exchanged glances, warily observing this strange exchange take place between Young Do and Su Bin. They seemed like...friends. Jun Ah raised an eyebrow and Rachel shrugged lightly.
"Su Bin, don't forget, we have to do our project too," Jun Ah prodded.
"Ah, yes," Su Bin said. "I'll just read the poem for you today. We can discuss it later, if you want," she quickly added, she didn't want to seem like she was eager or anything. She wasn't. She knew it was going to be dreadful and a terrible loathsome tedious task. Young Do only nodded lightly.
"Okay," he said as he stared at her expectantly to start reading. Jun Ah and Rachel went back to their murmurs, too ostentatiously involved in their project work, while eavesdropping on them conveniently.
She turned to Young Do who had one leg on the sofa and the other on the floor, his body turned towards her, his head balanced against the head of the sofa, supporting his head. She was startled by his physical proximity but tried not to show it.
"Well," Su Bin cleared her throat as she slowly read the incredibly long poem. She felt a blush rise to her face at the way Young Do stared at her. She stopped reading after two stanzas. "Can you stop staring like that? It's disturbing...and distracting."
Young Do smirked obligingly as he turned away from her to face Rachel and Jun Ah who sat on the floor, heads bowed, working on something. He closed his eyes and rested his head against the cushion. After the second part Su Bin realized she had had enough for a day, "Good night, ladies, good night, sweet ladies, good night, good night," she ended it. It only felt right.
Young Do's eyebrows crinkled and he turned to her. "It doesn't end so quickly," he complained.
"Well," Su Bin said forcedly, "we have a lot of work to do. Sorry, kid," she said handing the book back to him with a smile. Young Do glared at her but conceded. He checked his watch. "I'm going out," he announced to no one in particular.
"Bring Tteokbokki," Rachel said.
"You should come sometime," Young Do said quietly. Su Bin looked at Jun Ah wondering if she was as confused as her as to what the step-siblings were talking about but Jun Ah was deftly avoiding her gaze. Su Bin got the hint and minded her own business.
"I will. Next time," Rachel said, her voice a cold flat thing except for a tremor of tenderness in it. Young Do caught on to that tremor and smiled.
"Do you guys want Tteokbokki too?"
"Nah, we'll be leaving in a bit," Jun Ah said.
"Alright then, kids, be good," he said as he patted Rachel's head condescendingly. She swatted at his hand and glared at him.
When Young Do came back Rachel peered at him shrewdly. "What was that – before? With Su Bin?"
"Nothing," he said, handing her the Tteokbokki. She took it but refused to break her gaze. He shrugged.
"I like the way she read poetry," Young Do said simply. "That's it."
Rachel nodded, but her shrewd gaze did not waver. She wondered if Young Do had designs on Su Bin but it didn't seem so...for now. And she hoped it would remain so. She didn't want her brother to get involved with her friends. It was so...tacky.
A/N - So, what do you think about this, sisters?