Fly home.
There are eggs in your nest.
You have suffered, now rest.
I am waiting for you.
"Fly Home," Big Red Sun
Fly Home
The item was beamed directly to the bridge of the U.S.S. Carthage at First Officer Rachel Garrett's insistence. She knew that a package that was important enough to travel on three different transport ships from Betazed to get into transporter range was always something worth investigating. Besides, it had been a slow day.
Captain Haden raised his eyes in the general direction of the transporter chief's disembodied voice and sighed, resigned to his fate. "It's not alive, is it?"
"Uhh, not exactly?"
Haden turned to his science officer, who looked appropriately horrified. "As long as the Daughter of the Fifth House isn't arriving to commandeer my ship, you might as well beam it in."
"Yes, sir."
From his station, Ian Troi shrugged helplessly. "I have no idea what this is, I swear."
When the particles coalesced into solid form again and the transporter beams dissipated, a silver box sat on the floor in the center of the bridge. It was slightly smaller than Ian's console, made out of a shiny metal, and, most importantly, had a very humanoid face. The eyes were closed, as if it were sleeping peacefully.
Everyone froze, waiting for it to do something. Systems beeped, the gentle hum of the engines floated up through the floor. Finally, Lieutenant Zipser looked around. "She ain't in there, is she?"
Captain Haden stood up and strode toward the box. "What do you want?" Behind him, Garrett bit back a laugh. Haden drew himself up to his full height. "Speak, box!"
"Captain," Garrett said, voice strained with restraint, "it's a Betazoid gift box. I've seen my husband's family use them. They're sent to announce important occasions. They only respond to the recipient's voice."
The entire bridge crew turned to look at Ian, who stared back at them.
Haden huffed impatiently. "Well! Say something, Troi!"
Ian was suddenly at a loss for words. He slowly pulled himself out of his seat and wandered over to the box. He looked down into its shiny face and cleared his throat.
"Hi?"
The eyes flew open and the bridge crew stumbled back. Zipser let out a high-pitched squeal and fell out of his chair. Commander Li's phaser was trained on the box before it could speak.
"Ian Troi! A message from Lwaxana!"
"Subspace isn't good enough for her?" Zipser grumbled as he climbed to his feet.
"Congratulations, Imzadi! The joyous occasion is at hand!"
A hatch on the top of the box popped open and confetti shot out. Haden jumped, one hand on his heart, and then frowned at the mess on his bridge. Small pink and purple balloons floated out amongst the shower of confetti. An Ensign watched them go sadly, knowing he'd be the one figuring out how to get them off the ceiling.
Ian waited for the box to elaborate, but it just grinned at him. "What are you talking about?"
The face rolled its eyes and, instead of explaining itself, opened a hatch on the front of the box. Dozens of small items poured out across the floor.
Ian stared down at them, realization beginning to dawn on him. His eyes widened and he felt something grab at his heart. It ballooned in his chest and warmth spread through his body. Also, some faint panic.
Ian felt the rest of the crew gather around and begin slapping him on the back. Their voices rose in cheer, muffled through the ringing in his ears. The Captain recovered enough from his confetti-induced heart attack to shake his hand.
Ian stared down at the baby bottle that had rolled out of the box and hit the toe of his boot.
He felt Garrett hug him and finally looked up into the happy faces of his crew-mates. Zipser scooped up a handful of pink candy cigars and began passing them around. Li tucked a small stuffed bear into her phaser holster. Phillips and the Ensign had stacks of beads around their necks with small pacifiers hanging from them and were trying to coax one onto the Captain.
The gift box winked at him and after delivering the last of its message, closed its eyes and went back to sleep.
"Fly home soon, Papa."