Burnt Out Stars
A/N: I wrote this for Kuro Ookami Hatake who requested a Kleptoshipping A LONG time ago. ^-^ So sorry for the wait on it. This has an established relationship between Bakura and Yugi. I hope you like it. For those of you who have me on author alert, sorry for the first false alarm email about this story, I had to take it down rewrite the ending. -.- Edited Sept. 3, 2010
When Bakura and I became involved, he was already hooked on drugs. He snorted cocaine and injected heroin. But he didn't do them often, just when he went out to party and everyone else was doing it too. As our relationship become more intimate so did his with the drugs. Cocaine and heroin weren't enough, and he began doing LSD and speed. And instead of helping him quit, I continued to watch him destroy himself because I didn't know how to help.
Whenever I was conflicted, I would go out to watch the stars and drag him with me. We wouldn't say anything; just stare deeply into the stars. One time, when Bakura was sober, he asked me why I was interested in the stars, so I decided to show him. We were an odd couple and our dates were usually very strange. I took him to the park, arranged a blanket on the soft grass, and we laid next to each other. I pointed out the major constellations to him and told the tale behind them.
After two hours, when we were getting ready to leave I told him, "Everyone loves stars, Bakura, even you."
He smiled tightly, "It's because the stars are so high and unattainable." Thinking nothing of this comment I smiled and softly agreed. I linked our fingers together; he walked me home, and left me on my doorstep with a lingering kiss.
The next time I saw him, the sun was setting and I was walking home from Jou's house. He was sitting at a bench across from the game shop, staring intently up at the stars. As I approached, I could see in his eyes that he was high. I slowly continued and sat quietly beside him, following his gaze upwards. We sat there for a long while before Bakura even noticed me. "I'm high like the stars." Was his greeting, followed by a doped up laughter.
I hated when he was high. He did so many different drugs now that I couldn't even tell them apart anymore. "The high isn't real, Bakura." I thought as he stood. He grabbed my hand tightly as if sensing my thought and yanked me off the bench. He took my hands and started spinning me in a circle, dancing us around to the imaginary song in his head. He suddenly stopped and said, "Let's go to the park, and chase the stars." He tugged on my hand. I stood instead of letting him pull me along.
"Let's go." He repeated tugging again, frowning like he couldn't figure out why I wouldn't follow and probably couldn't. The drugs messed up his mind and thinking skills, so it wouldn't surprise me if he couldn't. "Fine," he let go of my hand. "I'll chase them without you."
He sulkily ran off and I watched until he disappeared into the night, and I let out a deep sigh. I followed him to the park.
When I arrived, I saw him sitting on the highest tower with his head resting on his hands that were atop his knees. I could tell his high was wearing off. I slowly climbed up the bars leading toward the tower. Bakura's eyes lit up when he saw me, but that was the only acknowledgment he gave to my presence. As I sat he stood and began to climb to the roof of the tower, with shaky legs he stood up and raised his outspread arms towards to the sky. "I want to be a star!" He yelled to the darkness. He laughed like a crazy person before the laughter died out to choked up sobs.
Alarmed, I cautiously climbed up to the roof and guided him to sit down. Though the drugs made him have violent mood swings, I still wasn't used to them. I put my arm around his shoulders and began to console him. "It's alright, Bakura, the demons aren't real, the drugs cause them. They're not real…" I continued reassuring him but at one point I slipped up. "Maybe if you quit them…"
He snarled and pulled away from me. "Easy for you to say when you're not the one hooked, isn't it, Yugi?"
"No!" I exclaimed softly, "It's not like that… I love you, dammit, and if you continue on this way, you'll OD and die. And then what? I'm left all alone because of your stupid drugs." He glared deeply at me and I held his gaze. "Is that what you want?"
He snarled again. "You don't understand." He tried pulling away some more but I grabbed his shirt by the hem.
"Maybe not, but I want to. I want you sober all the time, why can't you be?" I asked softly, pleading.
"I just can't. I don't know how to be." He pulled away more gently this time. "Now let me go, I'll play safe and see you later." There was something in his voice that made me believe him so I let him go.
Bakura gracefully jumped off the tower straight to the ground. He began to run off but not before shooting me a maniacal grin. He ran with his fingers lifted to the stars as if running his fingers through them.
At dawn, I heard him slip into the bed. He probably picked the lock like he used to at the beginning of our relationship. Groggily, I asked where he'd been.
"Further in the park, staring at the stars until the sun began to rise." He replied, holding me close to him. I had also lain awake; worried about him up until an hour before, when I fell asleep. "Let's sleep…" He said. We dozed on and off, but when we both woke he'd kiss me harshly on the lips before dozing off again.
It was around noon when we finally got up. Bakura said he was going to leave but when I offered him lunch he opted to stay. Grandpa had passed away two years ago and Atem was in Egypt, so we had the shop to ourselves. I made him a sandwich and he nosily ate it up in four bites.
We stumbled back upstairs, tangled up with each other, and didn't leave the bed until four. As we were just lying in bed together, I asked him if he wanted to go out for dinner. He agreed so I sent him home to get ready. We were going to a fancy restaurant at seven.
At seven thirty, when Bakura still hadn't arrived, I decided to leave the restaurant. I paid the check for services and walked solemnly to his and Ryou's house. When I arrived, I knocked on the door, Ryou answered shortly after. "Yugi," He greeted. His eyes looked tired and he was paler than usual. I imagine at this point, everyone who cared for Bakura was looking that way: Sick with worry.
"Hello Ryou," I said, "Is Bakura here?"
"Yes, he's out in the backyard…He's been there since he got in." Ryou moved to the side to let me in. "He's high." He added.
I sighed deeply, walked in and to the back door. I watched Bakura sitting in a tree through the window before going out. The night was cool and the smell was sweet. I walked slowly to the tree and noticed he was glaring at the stars. When he saw me, he glanced down and his glare didn't lessen.
"I waited for you for a half hour." I stated blandly.
"What?"
"At the restaurant where we were going to have dinner tonight," I reminded him, "I waited for you for a half hour."
"What restaurant?" He muttered looking back up at the stars, his glare never leaving his face.
I sighed, "Come down, Bakura. You need to get some sleep." I extended my hand to him. He eyed it for a while before accepting it, and I helped him down. We held hands and I walked him to his room. Whatever drugs he had done before I arrived had put him in a daze, so I helped him undress and put on some pajamas. Then I tucked him into his bed and kissed him softly on the forehead. "Good night, Bakura. You'll feel better in the morning." I whispered.
As I was turning away he grabbed my arm. "Am I beautiful like the stars?" He asked me, his voice uncharacteristically quiet.
My face softened. "You'll always be more beautiful than the stars in my eyes, Bakura." I assured him and kissed him again, but this time on his lips.
His face lit up. He closed his eyes and his arm fell limp. When I was walking out the door, I whispered, "I love you." I heard him softly return the sentiment. "Love you, too."
Later that night, I was woken up by the phone ringing. Groggily, I reached for it and answered, "Hello?"
"Yugi!" Ryou's voice sounded frantic.
At the sound of urgency in his voice, I sat up quickly, "What's wrong?"
"Bakura didn't wake up this morning, so I went up to his bedroom… It didn't seem like he was breathing!" Ryou wailed. "I'm headed to the hospital right now in an ambulance, could you please meet me there?" In the background, I could hear sirens.
"Oh, my God! Yes, I'll be right there!" I quickly hung up and rushed out of my room to get ready.
Within five minutes after the phone call, I arrived at the hospital where a sobbing Ryou met me. "What happened?" I exclaimed.
"He-he overdosed… He was announced de-dead on arrival." Ryou choked.
Suddenly, my world crashed around me. Guiltand sorrow filled my stomach; Bakura's death was my fault. I should've pressed him harder to quit. I gulped harshly, "Was it…suicide?"
Ryou nodded slowly, "There was a note with your name on it." He looked into his coat and started rummaging through it. Finally he pulled out a note with messy scrawl on it, and handed it to me, "I didn't read it," he promised.
I took it with a shaky hand and read it:
Yugi,
It looks like I finally achieved what I wanted: To be higher than the stars. I wish I hadn't had to leave you behind, but maybe someday you'll join me.
Bakura.
Slowly, as if being controlled by something else, I walked out of the hospital doors. There were rows of benches, and I collapsed into one of them, not caring what others thought.
The stars were still out, though barely, and I looked up at them. I don't know what I hoped to see. Maybe what drove Bakura to his death or maybe some small part of me hoped to see Bakura among the stars. They twinkled and shone, but they no longer looked beautiful, they seemed to be taunting me.
I hadn't noticed Ryou, but apparently he had followed me as I could feel him sitting close by. I collapsed into his ready arms, sobbing my heart out. I knew now that Bakura was with the ugly, burnt out stars, and I would never be able to reach him again. He's gone and I'm the one now wondering why he had liked the stars so much…