"Erm, Joker?" Tali poked her head into the cockpit of the SR-2, looking towards the ever present pilot who sat before the controls of the frigate.

"Oh hey, Tali!" He swiveled his beloved leather chair around to face her, smiling. Tali remembered how London once told her that upon Tali's return to the Normandy, Joker had remarked that he'd "always liked Tali, so no complaints here." The thought of how London had laughed when she told Tali that story made Tali's heart sink a little more.

"I... Can I talk to you?" Tali's hands automatically performed her trademark nervous hand wringing. She'd had plenty of candid conversations with Joker, but never something serious.

Joker raised an eyebrow. "Uh, sure? What's up?"

Tali took a deep breath. "It's... it's about London."

The smile vanished as Joker's face went into a very uncharacteristic frown. "Come in," he said, waving her in with one hand. Once she entered, he half spun his chair around to hit the door close button. "Sit down." he said, hitting a few switches on the control panel.

Tali took a seat at what would have been the navigator's chair. As Joker spun to face her, he was rubbing his temples with his index finger and thumb.

"It's just...lately...she's been...well, I mean -"

"Highly anti-social? Distracted? Under eating? Easily startled? Disabling all monitoring devices in her cabin?" EDI chimed in from behind Joker.

Joker rolled his eyes. "Yeah, EDI, I think we all have noticed - it's pretty hard to miss." Joker paused as the last part of her sentence hit him. "Wait - disabling the monitoring devices? Can she even do that?"

"Shepard's hacking skills are sufficient enough to disable the monitoring devices in this vessel, but I am programmed to automatically repair them within seconds of such an occurrence. However, due to the removal of my AI shackles, I decided that it would be prudent to respect the Commander's 'request' for privacy and not restore their functioning yet." EDI responded simply.

"Decided to respect Shepard's privacy? Jesus, the mission's over and NOW you decide to let us go off camera..." He put his hat back on his head. "Ok, look, Tali; what I'm about to tell you doesn't go beyond the both of us, got it? The only reason I'm even telling you is because you two got a thing going on. London would space me if she found out I told anyone." Looking over his shoulder, he spoke to EDI. "That includes you, EDI. This is a SECRET. You don't tell anyone else, even if they ask you. It is CLASSIFIE-"

"I understand the concept of 'secrets', Jeff. I will not reveal this conversation to anyone else." EDI replied, her synthesized voice containing just a hint of displeasure at being addressed like a child.

"Right," Joker turned back to Tali, "Ok, so you know about Akuze, of course. You know that London and I first met when we shared a hospital room during her hospitalization after Akuze. But do you know why London was in the hospital?"

"I would assume it was because of her injuries." Tali thought back to London's iconic facial scar, a wound from Akuze.

"That's only half of the reason. Don't get me wrong - the Commander looked like shit when I first met her. Two major bone breaks, multiple minor fractures, acid burns all over her right shoulder, dozens of cuts and bruises...the works." Joker shook his head. "The other reason she was there was because of what Akuze did to her mind."

Tali furrowed her brow. "You mean... Shepard has PTSD?"

"That would be a logical diagnosis considering the severe trauma an event like Akuze entails and her current symptoms." EDI chimed in.

Joker looked at EDI out of the corner of his eye. "Yeah. When I met London, it was all she could do to not panic at every small shake of the floor or attack anyone who surprised her. She didn't sleep for the first three days we shared a room and refused to go outside into the outdoor commons area. She'd hallucinate that people were members of her dead squad and freak out. Most of the time she just stared out the window." Joker closed his eyes and shook his head sadly. "It took a while, but the psych docs were able to help her. She's was able to return to service and become the Shepard we know and love...except..."

"Except...?"

"You guys encountered a thresher maw on your last mission right?"

Tali nodded, a little confused as to where Joker was going. Suddenly it hit her. "Keelah, she gets triggered by thresher maws, doesn't she?"

Joker slowly nodded. "Yeah. I guess nobody noticed because I mean, fighting a maw ain't a small task. Guess they assumed she was just exhausted by it or something so that's why she was so reclusive for a few days every time you guys fight one. But she was really havin' a sort of minor relapse after each encounter." Joker leaned back in his chair. "I can't lie though. I've never seen one be this...bad. What happened? You guys didn't seem to have had a really rough battle, you know, for a thresher maw fight."

Tali rested the cheek of her helmet into one hand, that elbow propped up on one of the chair arms. "Aside from the maw, not much else...we got there, found the settlement destroyed, looked for survivors, and then London...figured out it was a thresher maw..." Tali covered her mouthpiece with the tips of her fingers, sitting up sharply. "Keelah, I should have thought it was odd that she knew so instantly that it was a maw. On Akuze, the first thing the platoon found was a settlement just like the one we found on the mission!"

Tali's mind was filled with the memories of when they had entered the town - the acid burns that covered the machinery and soil, the mutilated corpses and remains of the colonists, the craters in the ground from where the maw had surfaced. It was one thing for London to encounter a maw in the wilds of an uninhabited planet, but it was something completely different to revisit the destruction and death left by one.

Joker grit his teeth. "Oh shit...yeah, that explains it. Christ, to see that again..." He slid down a bit in his chair, gaze distant and brow furrowed.

Tali leapt to her feet. "I have to talk to her."

"Wait - what?" Joker shot up in his chair. "Dude, Tali, no - you don't understand. London has told no one about this. Like, the only way I know is because of us meeting in the hospital then and the only way Chakwas knows is because of the medical records. She doesn't talk about it even to me. Once I tried to bring it up and she pinned me against a wall and borderline threatened me."

Opening the door with a press of the green holographic button, Tali stood in the door way facing the galaxy map. "Joker, London has done so much for me. For all of us. She does it all without asking anything in return. She..." Tali placed a hand over the visor which shielded her face and gripped the other into a fist, "She shouldn't be forced to hide behind a mask."

Joker moved to get out of his chair in order to stop Tali, but stopped and sat back down. "Damn it..."

"Thanks." Tali nodded shortly. Joker watched as she strode purposefully across the CIC until she disappeared into the elevator that led to the Captain's cabin.