Disclaimer: The characters do not belong to me, only the story written about them.
Note: I don't really consider this a "tag" to Heart because it doesn't add anything to the story itself, but I was haunted by the final scene in the episode. This was written in 10 minutes and has not been beta read, so all mistakes are completely mine. I just wanted to get it off my mind.
Courage and Strength
By NCGirl
God, Sammy. I have never been more proud of you than I was today. That's not to say that I wouldn't have given anything and everything to protect you from that pain and heartache, but today I saw you as the man you've become. The man that I am not sure that I can be. You bravely accepted a responsibility that few would have even acknowledged and my heart swelled with pride - right before it painfully shattered into a million pieces.
Don't think that I missed any of the irony in this situation, Sam. It is that irony keeping me awake tonight, watching over you in your alcohol-induced sleep. It's that irony feeding this overwhelming urge to pull you into a tight embrace and at least try to absorb some of the pain that you are feeling, although I know that I can not. It's that same irony that caused the surge of anger within me just moments ago when I punched the bathroom tile, most likely breaking my hand in the process. God, how am I going to explain that one to you in the morning?
Aww, shit, Sam. I know the torment that you are going through. I've lived it empathetically every day since the day Dad died; since the minute he passed on that fucking cryptic message. I've imagined that very same scenario, in every possible combination of events and every possible combination of circumstances, over and over and over again. I feel your pain, Sammy. Better than you'll ever know. And I'm so, so very sorry.
If tonight was a preview of possible things in our future, if – and I stress the word "if" – you turn evil and become something you are not, I can only hope for your sake that I have enough courage and strength to honor your wishes and save you the way you saved Madison a few hours ago.
But I swear to God, Sammy, I will not let it get to that point. I will find another way to save us from this. I have to.
I know you can't hear these thoughts in my head- the ones that are currently screaming louder than they ever have before, but I am making this vow to you. I will not let you go. I will not give up on you. I will fight with everything I have, use every resource I can find, to stop this "destiny" before it reaches the point of no return. We were too late for Madison, Sammy, but I will not let it be too late for you. We have an advantage, kiddo. We had a warning, however vague it may have been. And we have each other. And that may just be enough.
3/23/07